Helle Hath No Fury

Getting a huge burst of euphoria, Jaune gleefully flung her iPhone 7 into the sea. She immediately started to laugh, enjoying the adrenaline rush she was getting. Slowly, her laughter began to trickle off. She went abruptly quiet, staring out at the water with deep, deep, remorse. 

“I make these choices..” Jaune said. “These horrid, horrid choices..” she turned to Helle. “Any Skittles left?” she asked, a little desperately, gold eyes wide. “Please. I must distance myself from my atrocity, lest I be driven towards more reckless and unsustainable behaviour.” 

Helle laughed. “Nope, no Skittles,” she said, before pouring the entire rest of the Skittles into her mouth, crumpling the plastic packet, and chucking it at Jaune’s face. “But I can get your phone.”

“Disgusting,” Jaune uttered, recoiling a little bit. “Oh, disgusting! Chew with your mouth closed, please, please!”

Jaune blinked as Helle started coughing immediately after her somewhat odd request. “That looked.. rough,” she said, cautiously, watching as Helle struggled to dislodge pieces of candy. “Anyway, I think I was more than clear enough. I want you to dare me to throw my phone into the ocean. Not just any dare, either,” she looked proud of herself. “Triple dog dare me. Then I can’t possibly back down.”

After finally recovered from her coughing fit, Helle cautiously consumed the Skittles one by one, cross-legged on the sand and listening to Jaune talk.

Helle was a little peeved by this request. Hell(e), she didn’t even have a phone. Was Jaune really this affected by the season that she would make such a bizarre request? When Helle really thought about it, this actually seemed like something Jaune might do anyway, be it October or January or May. What the hell(e), she thought, shrugging.

“Yes, a hundred dollar bill,” sighed Jaune. “I’d saved that. So for the rest of the month, I suppose I am living off of my candy stock,” she huffed. She startled when Helle abruptly made a dive for her pack of Skittles, eating far more of them than was required. Jaune opened her mouth to protest, before sighing. That was fair.

She shuddered at the weird crunching sound produced when Helle abruptly chomped right down on all the candy in her mouth at one time. “Alright, alright, you win! Must you eat them like that? It’s barbaric.”

Jaune watched Helle eat her mouthful of Skittles with a flat expression, before an idea came into her head. “Hey,” she said. “Dare me to throw my phone into the ocean.” she grinned. 

Helle continued staring Jaune down, unblinking, as she worked her jaw around the Skittles, gradually grinding the candy into bits with her teeth. When Jaune accused her of being barbaric, she only smirked, and opened her mouth to pour more Skittles in, even though she still had partially chewed candy stuck to her teeth and tongue. “Barbaric,” Helle mocked in a lilting accent, speaking around her mouthful of Skittles and sending some pieces flying.

Jaune watched Helle dump the small remains of what was in the empty pack of Skittles into her mouth with a roll of her eyes. When Helle flickered through her forms briefly in rapid succession, she clucked her tongue softly in sympathy, deciding to stop sadistically indulging in Helle’s apparent desperation for Skittles. She took out the second pack of Skittles she had in her purse.

With anticipation, Jaune ripped them open, taking a small handful. “Yes,” she sighed. “It’s a wonder any of my belongings have made it this far! I keep smashing things and attempting to ruin everything! I poured milk into my bathtub and dumped a hundred dollar bill in there!” she said, distressed. “And I had planned to use that for food. October can kiss my keister,” she declared. “Want some?” she held the pack of Skittles out to Helle. 

Helle grunted, trying to pull herself into a sitting position. “Milk...in your bathtub?” Her eyes widened. “A hundred dollar bill?” That whole scenario seemed absurd to Helle, October or no October. Since she didn’t technically live on the island, and didn’t have work, money was hard to come by. She usually did some odd jobs here and there if she needed something short-term, but she didn’t really have any money saved. Maybe I should really open a bank account, she mused, zoning out of the conversation for a moment. Focus was difficult to maintain this time of year...

Jaune gave a startled blink at Helle’s abrupt transformation. “Ew. Fish breath,” she teased, a smirk playing at her lips. She gave a soft little intake of breath as their lips nearly touched, only to miss narrowly. 

She then found herself blushing generously as Helle pulled her even closer. “Oh, you can tell? What tipped you off?” she asked. Her gaze lazily drifted from Helle’s lips up to her eyes. “And what do you want me to do?” she asked. “Regurgitate them into your mouth? I’m no bird, Helle.”

Helle slid her hands slowly down Jaune’s arms before snatching the Skittles packet from her grasp and bouncing back a few steps. She stuck out her tongue at Jaune and upturned the bag over her open mouth, trying to catch the last rogue pieces of Skittle shell and candy dust that remained in the crevices of the plastic wrap. She didn’t even like Skittles that much, she was just bitter at this point.

The packet ended up floating to the sand as Helle abruptly fell to the ground in seal form and then flickered back into her human body. She lay on her back, the dramatic shifts causing her to groan in pain as she stared up at the dreary sky.

Jaune giggled. “Well, I brought you some Skittles, but it appears you can’t eat them, as you’re having trouble shifting. More for me!” she exclaimed, cheerfully, pulling out a pack of Skittles and opening it, putting a small handful in her mouth. 

“Don’t worry though, I mean, I’m not judging you or anything, dear. After all, I’m dealing with my own problems,” she gave a bit of a sigh. “I mean, I’m leaving a trail of destruction in my wake! I’ve just lost all my self control,” she tilted her head back and dumped the whole bag of Skittles in her mouth. “Hm, I guess I wouldn’t say all,” she said, through a mouthful of Skittles. “I mean, I clearly have some if I managed to drag myself out here, it’s merely diminished. Not that you can tell. Can you tell?” 

Helle helleplessly watched Jaune opening the Skittles and hogging them all for herself. Were Skittles Helle’s favorite snack? By no means. Did she even like them that much? Eh, they were okay. But seeing Jaune pouring a gigantic handful into her palm with no intention of sharing was infurating.

When Jaune dumped the whole packet into her mouth, Helle gave a loud bark and fell back into her human form, scrambling to her feet and jutting her nose right into Jaune’s face. “Hey! I wanted one!” She bounced forward on her tippy toes, almost brushing her lips with Jaune’s. “Gimme.”

@helleorhighwater​

Jaune wanted to scream. She had been watching Netflix and then she’d suddenly had the urge to rip her TV off of the wall and throw it onto the floor. She’d nearly done it too, but she was hit with the sudden idea to cram herself under her bed and use packs of Skittles as an appealing distraction.

She thought it better to channel her energy into something less destructive, so after dragging herself out from under the bed, she decided to see if Helle was perhaps dealing with her own October-related problems.

With care, Jaune selected an outfit— sadly, something a little less extravagant than she would typically go for. Her fear was that she’d give into some sort of impulse and ruin some really good clothes she was fond of. She did her eyeliner, then lightly misted herself with perfume (there were few things she enjoyed more than smelling lovely). Finally, she grabbed the packs of Skittles she hadn’t found the opportunity to tear into yet and put them in her purse in case Helle would like them.

She burst out of the water and tumbled onto the sand, merging briefly into her human form before flickering back into her seal body. She barked in frustration, flapping her flippers about in a desperate effort to shift. After a few moments of struggle, she fell onto her human back, breathing heavily.

A face appeared over her, looking amused. Grunting, Helle forced herself into a seated position and made sharp eye contact with her visitor.

“Look, it’s - ”

Jaune averted her gaze immediately, able to feel the blood rushing to her cheeks. How embarrassing. There Helle went again, getting so close.. it was fine— Jaune simply wouldn’t acknowledge her. She’d stubbornly look away until Helle gave up.

This proved much harder when Helle took two fingers and gently turned Jaune’s face to look at her. Jaune’s brows shifted slightly upwards, the golden eyes in question looking a mixture of fierce and abashed. Jaune was truly unable to tell if Helle actually liked her or if she just got a kick out of messing with her. Was the flirting another type of mockery in and of itself?

“No, not an elf. Je ne suis pas une dryade. What- a succubus? I beg your- no!” she gave an offended gasp, spluttering a bit before repeating, just to make sure Helle heard her, “No!” It was a bit of a sore spot for Jaune, mainly because it was not the first time somebody had appeared to think she was one. At least Helle was (probably) just being obnoxious; the other person had been serious.

The guess was actually pretty close, anyway, as succubi are demons, and Jaune was painfully aware of this fact. She hoped Helle would maybe direct her guesses elsewhere, Jaune wanted her to be wrong some more. “I’m never going to tell you,” she singsonged. 

Watching Jaune’s face blossom with crimson was enough to spur Helle on. Sure, it was fun to mess with her - she was still an annoyance - but there was something else underneath it, something Helle didn’t care to examine within herself just yet.

Jaune’s reaction to the suggestion of her being a succubus was interesting too. Helle was sure that, while she believed Jaune was telling the truth about not being a succubus, she had gotten awfully close to hitting the nail on the head.

It took everything in Jaune not to give a shriek of horror at the wad of icky seaweed in her lap. She wanted to deny Helle that small pleasure, but she wasn’t able to suppress several full-body shudders and a little whimper in the back of her throat that she was sure did it for the other girl anyway. Thank god she wasn’t wearing anything too fancy, just a cute $25 skater skirt she’d found online that could be washed, and if that didn’t work, Jaune could replace it. Still. Just thinking about the seaweed in her lap upset her, and shipping fees here were horrible.

Gingerly picking up the seaweed and trying to touch as little of it as possible, Jaune flung it away, laughing dryly as Helle completely lost it. Jaune noted her shifting back into her human form. Her first thought was, At least she can’t spit any more seaweed into my lap, and her second thought was a bemused, Hm, not that that’d stop her. 

Selkie, that was it. Jaune groaned internally, feeling like she should have gotten that. She knew of selkies, though she didn’t know any personally, they were usually friends of friends. It was a little embarrassing the term had so completely slipped her mind.

Dignity somewhat in shreds, Jaune thought of ways to salvage the situation. “I’m not telling you,” she said, faux innocence in her tone. She twirled some of her hair around her finger. “For all you know, I could be a human.” She tilted her chin up somewhat smugly, glad she still had this one thing to lord over Helle.

Helle chuckled softly. “A human, huh?” She pulled herself onto into a seated position and inched closer. “With that speed?” She tilted her head, amused at the way Jaune was refusing to look directly at her. Helle scooted closer, putting two fingers to Jaune’s chin and turning the girl’s face towards hers. She spoke lowly. “And those eyes?”

She let the moment hang, watching Jaune closely, then dropped her hand. “Not possible.”

Jaune had nearly forgotten to keep watching when a seal appeared right in the center of her vision, leaping grandly out of the water before falling back in with a splash. Her eyes widened in a mix of astonishment and respect. She was some sort of shapeshifter type, clearly. Jaune tried to think of supernatural creatures that had anything to do with seals, but found herself drawing a blank.

Jaune’s high energy levels were beginning to ebb away. Knowing herself well, Jaune sat down on the sand— a large wave of fatigue was going to hit her soon. The chaotic deed had been done and this was the price she had to pay for it every time.  

She continued to stare at Helle from her seated position, taking a moment or two to find her voice. “Is that the reason you brought me out here?” she asked, trying to sound inconvenienced but sounding just as astonished as she looked. “To show off?” 

Helle had one last trick up her metaphorical sleeve. She wobbled over to Jaune, who had collapsed on the sand...and spit up a wad of seaweed into her lap.

At Jaune’s reaction, Helle was overwhelmed with such a wave of hilarity that she had to shift back into her human form to laugh. She quickly transformed back, bundles of pale brown hair exploding from her head as her laughter exploded from her throat. She fell on her back into the sand, kicking up her heels in the throes of her amusement. Holy shit, she couldn’t breathe. This was too good.

“I brought you out here for the look on your face!” she managed to squeal between what could only be described as guffaws at this point. Man, she hadn’t laughed this hard in...weeks? Months?

Hilarious. This stuck-up girl was just too fun to mess with. What a pleasant surprise she’d come upon today. Way better than the film she had been planning to see.

Jaune waited to see if Helle had died.

She came to a somewhat messy stop on the shore, a bunch of sand flying into the air due to her sudden stop. Delicately moving her skirt out of the way, she got on her knees and peered into the water. “Hello? Are you deceased? Drowning, perhaps? Struggling to breathe?” she called, brow furrowed slightly with concern.

“You have to respond, I need to know whether or not the authorities should be phoned,” she said, not taking the situation too seriously. Helle was fine, wasn’t she? There was something decidedly supernatural about her, and Jaune would stay to find out what exactly it was.

She kept her fingers gingerly away from the water, as that was where her fire was conducted and she learned from experience that dipping her fingers in large bodies of water like lakes and oceans was not a good idea (read as: it made her shiver and gave her flu-like symptoms for about a week). She, however, felt safe enough to gaze down into the water, which churned and frothed, a searching look on her face.

The wind was stronger near the water and blew her curls around, and Jaune had to keep brushing them out of her face.

Once under the water, Helle felt her body urging her to shift. It was possible for her to swim and remain in her human form, but it was difficult. Her selkie form naturally wanted to emerge when she was in the ocean, so she relaxed and let the change take place. Arms became flippers, her legs a tail, her flesh toughened and strengthened and stretched. As always, Helle felt her undiluted power rush back into her bones, and it was exhilarating. She swam hard for the surface and burst through, her seal body arching through the air before plopping back down into the waves with a splash.

Jaune widened her eyes as Helle went even faster on her bike. “Oh, no way,” she said, under her breath. “I refuse to be bested..” she paused for a moment, to evaluate. Could a human go that fast on a bike in such a state of horrific disrepair? A little inkling of suspicion started to form in Jaune’s mind, and it continued to grow as Helle spurred her bicycle on ever faster. 

She wondered perhaps if Helle was noticing her own scientifically implausible speed. Helle did have that sort of vibe about her, now that Jaune was really giving it some thought.. 

Then Helle started rocketing forward on her rickety little bicycle at a speed that was definitely not anything a human was capable of. With a combination of fascination and horror, Jaune watched Helle head straight for the water, her bike rushing over the sand. She didn’t know what to do except follow in hot pursuit, calling out a confused and slightly concerned, “Stop! You’re going to ride straight into the ocean!”

If she was a human, this could only end in disasters ranging from unfortunate to horrific. “Watch where you’re going!” She was going at such an unreasonably fast speed that Jaune wondered if she was perhaps unable to stop. If she employed the brakes now, the whole thing would teeter forward, certainly unseating the girl and sending her flying. Half of Jaune loved the concept. The other half, that had meticulously drilled morals and empathy until it became something approximating on second nature, was deeply distressed at the thought. “You could drown!” 

Half of her knew already that Helle wouldn’t. Jaune just wasn’t personally ready to admit it to herself yet, and anyway, she had to play along, right? Helle probably thought she was a human. She looked plain enough, what with the magic charms and the contacts— the contacts. At the speed she was going at, with all the wind whipping past her face, they should be starting to dry out. Jaune felt no discomfort. She mentally ran through everything she’d done before walking out of the door.. she’d forgotten her contacts. Oh. This changed things.

Jaune continued to run, no longer giving calls of concern, just wanting to see if anything would happen, and if Helle really was just a human after all and she started to drown or something, Jaune would call 9-1-1.

Approaching the ocean, the sand beneath the wheels got more wet and the bike got more difficult to steer. Helle could hardly hear Jaune over the crashing of the waves and the wind blustering in her ears, but she could hear enough to know that Jaune was still hot on her heels. After that final burst of speed, this feat was impressive for a supernatural being, but impossible for a human. That was the last bit of confirmation Helle needed.

Jaune couldn’t thank her enough for the taunting— it only gave her more energy. She increased her pace, even though she knew she shouldn’t. It was reckless and entirely irresponsible to go this speed chasing after a human, and she winced to think of the possible consequences. Jaune was on such a chaos high that it somewhat impaired her decision making process, and despite all logic suggesting she do otherwise, she kept tearing after Helle, even daring to add an “Aw, what? Is that all you’ve got, darling?” 

She couldn’t help but laugh out loud. This arrogant, egotistical girl probably thought Jaune would’ve been left far in the dust by now. It was too bad that Jaune was still behind her, because she would love to see the look on Helle’s face when she realized how rapidly Jaune was gaining on her. 

A thought suddenly occurred to her, and she briefly looked around at her surroundings. She hadn’t the slightest idea where exactly Helle was leading her, so she had to be very cautious. She could end up lost. For all Jaune knew, that could be Helle’s intent. After all, the girl didn’t seem to care for her too much.

She’d really gotten herself into quite the situation. All the same, it was going to be worth it. If Jaune could keep up this pace, she’d be able to run right next to Helle’s bike, just long enough to give a devilish, taunting wink before running up ahead of her.

Every glance over her shoulder revealed Jaune to be closer and closer to Helle’s bike. Damn, this girl was fast, and she was gaining. Suspicions about Jaune as a supernatural being came back to tickle Helle in the back of the brain, insistent. She tried to shake them away, but really, how fast could most humans run? And barefoot, at that? Probably not as fast as Jaune was going right now.

So when Helle heard Jaune’s next taunt, she decided to test the waters a little bit. She urged her bicycle faster, knowing that she would probably reach the vehicle’s limit before she reached her own. As a selkie, her tail was muscular and powerful, so it followed that her human legs were the same. Helle pushed on, daring the both of them to find that point at which it was no longer plausible that either of them were human. She wondered when Jaune would notice, and if not, when she would break. Jaune wouldn’t dare to go too fast unless she knew Helle was supernatural too, would she?

Jaune continued to approach rapidly as the pair wheeled around bends and over slight hills. Helle thought back to that pair of mesmerizing golden eyes.

There was no way in helle Jaune was human.

And so, reckless with exhilaration, Helle did something extremely irresponsible but extremely satisfying.

Jaune searched Helle’s face for a sign of a response, and gave a single, startled blink when that face was suddenly a lot closer to hers than it had been. She stared back at Helle as she spoke, lips parting slightly as she tried to process the sudden closeness of their faces.

“Yes,” Jaune repeated, cautiously. “I’m only out for a walk.” She arched a brow, quietly mystified. What was Helle playing at? It had to be something, right? Her gaze focused on Helle’s lips as she ran her teeth over them. “Ah,” she said, exquisitely. Absently, she ran her tongue over her own.

Then Helle suddenly called for a race, the words casually rolling off her tongue. Jaune gave a laugh of startled disbelief. What? Hadn’t they just been at each other’s throats? It was hard to comprehend. The same girl that had almost crashed straight into her seemingly without remorse was now challenging her to a race.

Jaune knew full well she was no match on foot for someone going near full speed on a bicycle, but due to how erratic all this had been, she certainly had the energy to at least try. A large part of her wanted to run after Helle— but was it a good idea to chase her, after all of the mockery? Jaune had to keep in mind that Helle had almost full-on hit her and had still not expressed what she would consider a proper apology. She was just about to use her good sense and promptly leave this all behind when Helle made another little throwaway remark— ‘You know you want to.’

That was the only push Jaune needed. She hurriedly slipped out of her flats, holding them in one hand, and with an exhilarated laugh and plenty of adrenaline pumping through her system, she took off after Helle.

Eyes dancing with gaiety, she called to the girl up ahead, “You know, the thing I said about you being enamoured with me was merely jest! I didn’t expect I’d be correct!”  

Pedaling as hard as she could, Helle called on every ounce of her selkie strength. She was going to win this race and wipe the smug grin off of that arrogant girl’s face. Her hair streaking out behind her as she flew down the road, she glanced over her shoulder every few seconds to find Jaune in hot pursuit.

She’d licked her lips, right? Jaune totally licked her lips.

Laughing at the barefoot girl’s sudden earnest, Helle started to formulate a plan. If she beat Jaune to the beach by a fair amount, she could probably shift and slip into the waves before Jaune knew what hit her. Helle chuckled at the mental image of the infuriating girl standing on an empty beach, looking around in confusion.

But she doubted she’d end up far enough ahead to shift safely. This Jaune girl was...weirdly fast. Almost supernaturally fast. Helle hummed under her breath, curious. “Is she...?”

“I am fluent in French, so I’m well aware of what the word jaune means, but thank you kindly for the language lesson,” Jaune retorted. With annoyance, she watched Helle ride around her in those detestable slow circles. “There is absolutely no relationship here to speak of. I speak genuinely when I say the only closeness I feel for you is how close I am to pushing you off of that sorry excuse for a bicycle.”

Jaune was starting to question if the human race was really worth saving. She crossed her arms, stewing silently in irritation as Helle continued to talk. Her eyes idly followed Helle’s pointing finger before focusing back on the insolent girl on the bicycle. 

Personally, she felt that jumping into the ocean was highly preferable to standing there and listening to the sound of Helle’s voice. Even so, she wouldn’t consider doing such a thing. The shirt she was wearing was certain to sustain some sort of damage, and considering it was an 85 dollar piece, Jaune wasn’t about to sacrifice it just to make a point, even if doing so would probably propel this further. She couldn’t recall the last time she’d slipped up and let herself indulge in some casual pandemonium. A small part of her was still reprimanding herself for enjoying it so much. The other part of her was content to keep enjoying it. It was, after all, quite revitalizing.

“Anyway,” she said, airily. “You’re entirely correct, I was just out for a walk, but surely you have places to go. After all, you were in such a hurry to head into town! I know I’m captivating, but please, don’t let yourself remain so deeply enamoured with me that you miss any obligations you might have,” she batted her eyelashes. “I’d hate for you to miss something important.”

This time around, Helle couldn’t stop herself from laughing at Jaune’s play on words. She tried to turn it into a derisive snort, but the genuine laugh underneath bubbled through. She couldn’t help feeling a quick bolt of fondness for this feisty acquaintance. It was almost impressive how well Jaune had held her own against a frustrated Helle. Almost.

She caught Jaune looking mildly intrigued at the very thought of jumping into the ocean. Contrary to what she wanted to think, Helle knew somewhere, deep down in her stubborn heart, that she’d found a kindred spirit. Why not do something crazy, just for the heck of it? Life was too short. Or for Helle, too long.

Turning suddenly and screeching to a halt a foot from Jaune’s nose, Helle issued an invitation with a smirk and a wild glint in her eyes. “Just out for a walk, hm?” What was she doing? She had a film to catch.

Ah, well. Nothing that wouldn’t be showing tonight or tomorrow.

She tilted her chin up and cocked her head to the side until her face was a few electric inches from Jaune’s. Against her better judgement, she let her teeth run slowly over the soft flesh of her lips, eyeing Jaune’s reaction carefully.

“Race ya.”

Jaune’s eyes flared. “Oh, haha,” she said, sarcastically. “How quaint! I’ll have you know, I have been nothing but cordial! You,” she took a deep breath, smiling politely, though the indignation didn’t quite manage to leave her face. She pursed her lips. “Alright,” she said, exhaling calmly. “Well. There is absolutely no cure for the impudent so I shan’t waste anymore time on this— are you seriously riding circles around me?”

Her eyes only darkened the longer Helle kept it up. “Dom fucking Pérignon,” breathed Jaune. “Dom fucking Pérignon in the fridge. All mine.. tall glass…” Breath in, breath out. “My name is Jaune, you little pr.. potential.. friend. It’s not yellow.”

She took more deep breaths, but she still felt like a single rubber band, pulled taut, with eyes and a mouth. She snapped. “Have you no shame?” demanded Jaune, those golden eyes narrowing. “You’re the one who came speeding down the corner! I took it surprisingly well, you know, and now you are expressing an explicit desire to genuinely strike me with your bicycle? I have a question— if you say the word ‘sorry’, with any shred of authenticity in your tone, will you suffer from a stroke? Go into anaphylactic shock? I’m genuinely curious, because this aversion you have seems serious.” 

All thoughts of caramel and Dom Pérignon had completely disappeared. “By the way, Helle is fitting,” said Jaune offhandedly, internally groaning. No. Now she was definitely provoking the girl. Her ‘new Jaune’ mantra had failed her completely. “This is easily the most hellish encounter I’ve ever had.” she casually looked down, inspecting her nails with faux carelessness.“Anyway, are you going to move out of the way, love? I do have places to be. I can’t just stand around and talk to four year olds forever.” She flitted her eyes up to meet Helle’s with a challenging and mischievous smirk. 

Jaune was going to have to put at least 15 dollars in the ‘Bad Jaune’ jar. 

Helle let Jaune talk, sometimes throwing in a word or two, mimicking the girl’s formal manner of speaking. “Quaint,” Helle echoed, her voice high and mocking. “Cordial. Impuuuuuudent.” She knew she’d really gotten under the Jaune’s skin when she started muttering something about fancy wine. What was this girl’s deal? Did she think she was royalty or something?

“Funny,” Helle said lightly, letting go of the handlebars entirely to plant on hand on her hip and let the other tap against her chin. The bike wavered slightly, but continued in lazy circles. “Granted, it’s been a while since I’ve spoken French, but - ” she threw one palm dramatically to her cheek - “my, oh my, I do believe that jaune does...in fact...mean....yellow.”

Golden eyes flashed, which only egged Helle on more. “Hm, what would happen if I apologized?” she mused thoughtfully. “Well, I would be lying through my teeth, and I feel like adding dishonesty to our relationship at this stage would just be a touch too drastic. I think we’re both better off being genuine, don’t you?”

When Jaune made a pun on her name, Helle couldn’t help raising one corner of her mouth in a silent smirk. God, she loved puns. But she also loved winning arguments. So when Jaune suggested she had the demeanor of a four-year old, Helle could only laugh. Oh god, if only Jaune knew. Helle didn’t talk about her age often, especially not in front of what were probably just annoying humans, but it took a lot of self-control for her not to pull the thousand-years-old card right then and there.

Jaune went silent, trying very hard to reign herself in (read: not start grinning stupidly). How chaotic. She wrestled with her urge to goad Helle on, trying to think happy thoughts— caramel, her bottle of Dom Perignon waiting for her in the fridge when she got home, smiling condescendingly at Helle to make her upset—

“Well…” said Jaune, mentally reminding herself that was something the old Jaune would do. The new Jaune does not push others to make bad decisions. She mellows out and she has a good time. She’d been doing this for decades, was this a reminder she still required? “My name is Jaune,” she introduced herself. “Thank you so much for asking. As for how you could help me.. I’m thinking perhaps a proper apology.” 

“Oh, and you know what?” cried Jaune suddenly, struck with an idea. “I’ll give you a guideline. I mean, apologies can be difficult, don’t you think? Anyway, you could say something like ‘Hello, Jaune, it’s very nice to meet you, though I do wish it had been under slightly better circumstances. I’m sorry for raising my voice. I realize now I was turning a corner at an unreasonable speed on a bicycle unfit for riding, and for that, I apologize and will agree not to use the vehicle anymore until I have acquired a helmet and it is securely fastened on my head.’ Then I’ll leave it to you to ad lib something about starting afresh.” 

Jaune smiled hopefully, meeting the other’s glare without blinking, a little too prideful not to meet Helle’s piercing gaze with one of her own. “That works, right?” Her brain was still pinging with chaos, and she felt instinctively that she might have to jog off the excess energy. She felt ready to run a race.

Oh, boy. Oh boy oh boy oh boy Helle was about thisclose to losing it with this girl. Did Golden Eyes think being irrationally gorgeous would let her off easy? How arrogant.

“Wow, funny, I literally didn’t ask,” Helle muttered when the pain in the ass introduced herself as Jaune, and gripped her handlebars tightly until her knuckles turned white. She listened to Jaune’s entire monologue about apologies and resisted grinding her teeth, though she did find herself bursting out into sharp laughter when the soliloquy finally ended. What a character she’d run into. Or rather, not run into. She found herself wishing that she had. Was it too late?

Helle smiled forcefully, her lips tight at the edges. “You’re right. I do have a few words for you. And thank you so very much for the template, I shall be sure to employ it.” She cleared her throat. “Hello, yellow, it’s very awful to meet you, though I do wish it had been under no circumstances whatsoever. I am not sorry for raising my voice. I realize now I was turning a corner at a reasonable speed towards a person unfit for befriending, and for that, I am regretful and will agree to only use the vehicle from now on if I’m going to actually hit the asshole who’s walking in the middle of the street. As for starting afresh...suffice it to say, I would rather not.”

As if to illustrate her point about the bike, Helle urged the rusty old thing into motion and rode in slow, taunting circles around Jaune. Oh, it had been a while since she’d gotten into a good argument. Energized and mind buzzing frantically, she felt ready to bike a marathon.