the grand story

So I met Misha at Hollycon in Osaka and he was the sweetest thing in the world.

The photo op went by really fast (probably less than 30 seconds for every person) but I pushed my luck because, I don’t know, I have one chance to meet him so I might as well? When I went up to him, I was shaking and all I could manage to say was “Oh my god, can I hug you?” and he said, “Yes! Of course!” and I replied saying “Jesus Christ, I’m fucking shaking” and he started laughing. At this point, I started tearing up and trying not to cry because holy shit, I’m actually talking to Misha Collins. Anyway after the photo was taken, I held his hand and I said: Misha, it would mean a lot if we’d take a polaroid with my camera later on. Said by this lovely person, they were fucking right. Misha can never say no. I was absolutely shocked when he said yes!

Skipping to about four hours later, the autograph line had more than 400+ people but our little angel greeted every single fan as genuinely as he can. He said thank you and listened to the Japanese fans, encouraging them to continue speaking even if they struggle with English.

My chance was coming and I was shaking when I saw Misha and I think I was holding my breath the entire time. I told him everything about how shitty my life’s been and he listened to me so carefully. I told him things I’ve never told anyone in my life and he said that he was so sorry that I had to go through that. I told him how much his story motivates me to get through bad things, and I told him how much Supernatural means to me.

I was just so choked up on tears and I kept apologizing for crying and he said that it was okay. Then he started to get up because I was sobbing by then and then he hugged me and said that “there’s always a light at the end of the tunnel”, he looked at me in the eyes and asked if I was okay. I looked back at him and held his hands like my life depended on it saying, “Misha, I was six months clean until two days ago and I feel terrible about it”— it was so hard to say that simple sentence and I felt so crushed. He looked genuinely upset and it broke my heart but he replied saying, “You’ve been six months clean?” and I confirmed it. He then held my hands and said “it’s not worth it, things do get better and I promise that” and I broke down even more by then. He hugged me for a longer time while I cried and he was so sweet and gentle about it. He let me go and put his hands on my shoulders and I started laughing because, goddamn it, my glasses were fogging up.

And I almost forgot! I asked Misha again about the polariod and he was like “Oh yeah, I remember you saying that!” and then we took a photograph together. I looked at him and started tearing up again (because let’s face it, I’m a cry baby) and I said, “You know, you’re just as nice as everyone says you are” and said, “oh no, that’s not true”. Misha, if you’re reading this, it is true. You saved me.

After I gathered my stuff from the table, I looked back and said “Please let there be 10 more years of Supernatural” and he laughed and said “Oh, yes!”

I can’t believe I got to spend so much time with this man. This absolutely angel. I held up the line and I apologized to everyone but I saw that they were teary eyed by my encounter with Misha too, they saw his gestures and got emotional over seeing this. I was speaking English throughout all of this when everyone else was Japanese— this huge language barrier doesn’t matter, everyone saw what Misha did and they took it to heart.

I didn’t think I could love Misha any more and then this happened. I’ll never forget this and I’ll never forget what he’s said and done for me. Gosh, I’m actually sobbing while typing this. I’ve always daydreamed about meeting him but… I never thought that it would go like this. I’m beyond grateful.

— Kalel (but I told Misha that my name was Anna)