connected

me, a witch having a bad mental health day: *shoves a bunch of different crystals in my pockets* rocks pls

On some real shit, I do not fuck with people who ride those boat things at the carnival. People who get on those do not give a fuck about life, they don’t care about you, ya mama or your kids. They literally have nothing to lose. You don’t care about life so there’s no need for me to fight you because you’re not going to give a damn about my face. 

12? I got on this bitch when I was 21 and had my head in my ex’s shoulder the ENTIRE time. Screaming like a bih too. Nope. Never again. I was praying to the gravity gods the entire time.

?????? All it does is swing back and forth???? I don’t understand the concern??????

centrifugal force keeps you in your seat.

Centrifugal force isn’t keeping me from crying tho

why is this so funny

You know skinny jeans are gonna go out of style eventually but we’re gonna keep wearing them. They’re gonna become mum jeans. Parent style. People are gonna be like “oh my god dad your jeans are so tight it’s so embarrassing please put something else on” and you’re gonna be like “oh yes because those flappy impractical things are so much better” and you will feel superior but really you will be Uncool. You will be Uncool and you won’t see it, just like your parents. This is your fate. 

Little cutie

Bring back the phase of society where having your tiddies all the way out was fine but showing ankle flesh was scandalous

i know this is aiming at 17. and 18. and 19. century fashion, but i really wanna bring back those dresses that only basically start under the boobs, like that little number Minoan snake goddess figurine is wearing

titties out, snakes up, she’s ready 2 go

I am forcibly removed from the historical narrative

me (looking at my plants): why don’t we ever talk