⛌﹜TOBY

Heya I’m Toby, I’m managing this little blog for myself,,, because I’m bored and I can LOL. So let me speedrun a little intro:

20yo | Introject | PF-DID + AuDHD + BPD | I stutter a lot irl and it SUCKS!! This blonde bitch @repulsivefreak laughs at me for it (ily.. don’t kill me)

I like horror/ supernatural shit like: Slenderverse, CRP, DBD, Supernatural (the show) , Fran Bow, Other cool horror games I’m too lazy to list atm,, and also Sonic and Transformers special interests LOL

Basically life has been shit, our senior dog passed away, life feels like a hydraulic press on my soul and I’m losing it

Im tired, genuinely exhausted, paranoid on the highest level because of course we have an insane amount of anxiety holders plus the WORST paranoia holder we have in front because yeah… yeah that’s what I wanted

I’m also trying not to throw up but that’s besides the point I guess, I feel like km about to end up like riddler and start shaking like a chihuahua because im having a moment

All of us feel like doom, despair, and everything shitty so it’s truly an experience tbh

Kind of hoping Neo (our gatekeeper) pushes someone whos either very apathetic or a little to front so we can take a break from nauseating anxiety and panic

Get me out bruh

I bet 10$ we’ll end up breaking down or crying chat

I heart BPD and how it’s like “oh haven’t been spoken to in (amount of time) yeah you’re the worst and everyone hates you and you’re annoying and this other person sucks but also you suck but everyone else is shit because they hate you and-“ /sar

Like oh my god. What the fart. Please let me be normal for two seconds I beg

Or it’s stupid stuff like

“Yeah you’re fucked you’re gonna be alone and that’s why you feel like shit because they hate you and won’t talk to you on purpose and you’ll be abandoned”

Not tryina romanticize being persecutors but also mfs got to stop saying that persecutors are all misunderstood, no. Not all of them, I know what I do and I don’t care enough to change.

Like yes. I’m problematic, plainly that.

Also I don’t say ts in “oh evil alter” way. Like. No? We just aren’t fucking perfect?? Like dude. Mentally ill systems are not gonna have all parts be nice and kind and perfect at coping even with therapy and meds.

We went through too many years of self destruction and trauma 4 that. LOL.

Hope ts doesn’t come off as edgy emo alter. I’m just ranting here since I’m not interested in pissy headmates if I say something wrong to whoever they fuckin’ talk to.

I dry heaved into the toilet for NO REASON like why am I feeling sickly dude. WHY.

And we also might have gastroparesis, time to go to gastroenterologist for the millionth time

Lowk we have been avoiding going back after getting our gallbladder removed bc I fear they’ve seen enough from us LOL

Also kinda still annoyed over the fact that we can’t even dance to the music we like in our room like losers without needing to sit or lay down because we’re super symptomatic to our hear rate going higher

Us vs figuring out what the fuck is wrong with us physically

Tried my best to capture how my day is going so far with this one

Tim Drake vs literally everyone else

It’s great this is awesome

I’m thinking about drawing some of us and posting it, but idk might get sidetracked

Let us know if you’d wanna see that stuff !!