Harriet

——Nica's POV——

[BLACK]

The moment a rotten fruit had fell upon Kate's shoulder, I knew she had gotten too close.

[LONDON - BEACH SHORE - NIGHT]

(Ahh…tell me this isn't real.)

As I stared out into the quiet sea, I thought back on the stroke of bad luck that had fell upon Kate some hours ago.

When I had laid my eyes on her and that unexpected bad luck—

I had realized my true feelings, to which I held my head.

(See, this is why I didn't want add anything more dear to me…)

"Bad luck will follow those loved by the one who bears the White Swan's Curse."

(Ring had always been hit by bad luck— as he's the one I'm most close to.)

Before I knew the nature of my Curse, I had thought Ring was simply not lucky,

but I had since learned that in reality, I was stealing his luck away from him,

and in part to hide my Curse, I had gradually put more distance between us.

(Still, even if she's normally not the most lucky, it could still get pretty bad for her.)

Unlike Ring, Kate was a normal girl.

Even if she wasn't Cursed, it wasn't like she had received any special training.

She was a fragile girl who may as well have gotten injured at the slightest of shocks.

(That said, she's got a strong will on her.)

But that was more so a testament to her character than it was her physical strength.

Even if Ring could laugh his bad luck off, for Kate it probably wouldn't have been that casual.

(Like what would you have done if you had gotten hurt back there?)

There was a chance she would end up caught in a messy situation, or end up receiving serious trauma…things one could hardly laugh at could happen constantly, and yet—

Nica: …There's no way the likes of me can make you happy.

No matter how much affection she hit me with, I was nothing but a Cursed one who would only give Kate bad luck;

Cursed by the White Swan with the sin of narcissism, fated to be the only one who would find happiness…

The lowest of the low.

Nica: How did things turn out like this?

Since when did Kate get so close to me?

Was it since the day we first met? During the time I had been playing her? Or around the time she learned of my true nature and had been made a toy?

They all felt like the right answers; I couldn't believe myself.

(I wouldn't have even reached out to her if I didn't have some interest.)

She was a civilian in Crown, someone not in any document on them, with a special role called fairytale keeper.

I had gotten close to her to use her for information,

but now that I thought back on it, it would be more accurate to say I had done so for my own intelligence work than for fishing out Crown's secrets.

(She's a civilian who won't be in Crown for more than a month. There's no way she could tell even if she wanted.)

But I had tried to get information through Kate.

And since I had taken an interest in that pure, innocent robin in the den of evil,

I had ended up wringing my own neck instead.

Nica: …You're not too much better, though, Spatzi, are you?

(You should've snitched on me to Crown as soon as you could after telling me I'm the worst.)

If you had done that, you wouldn't have been made a plaything; you could just be a poor girl who got played by a frivolous guy…

(Well, I know you don't have the heart for that, so here we are.)

The documents Kate had snatched were nothing major,

but it was hard to believe that those documents were the only ones in the office.

(Chances are high that shrewd Queen's Aide left only those there on purpose.)

He had probably saw our movements and left only things that would be no problem if we knew.

That was more than likely the case.

It looked like she had always been scared of getting killed by Crown,

but looking from the side, it seemed she was quite well-liked, so I figured that wouldn't happen.

(At worst she'd either be bound to another month's work as fairytale keeper, or she'd be forbidden from making contact with us.)

Though I had purposely used words to rile up her anxiety, I also knew it wasn't really such a big deal.

(But then I just had to go and make her my plaything…)

Letting out a deep sigh, I crossed my arms while thinking of what to do.

I felt responsible for her.

Her, who struck me with her blindingly honest feelings,

who I had grown fond of, who at some point I had let in…I had brought this on myself.

(To think I'm a frivolous man who plays with love to no end, huh.)

Nica: Go fall in love with some other guy, you stupid robin.

I drew a line in the sand.

It was obvious a normal, good man was better for someone honest like her, who was loved by many.

Nica: So why did you fall for the likes of me of all people?

I talked to myself as I let out a dry laugh.

[BLACK]

(…I have to do something.)

So that no more bad luck befalls on her, so that she doesn't exert herself any more for my sake—

I couldn't let her go through the same things [1] as Ring had.

[LONDON - VOGEL MEETING ROOM]

That was why Dari's words were all the more convenient to me.

Nica: As for the three who tried to kill me, Mark Hoffman was their guardian.

Darius: One of the researchers at Haus, it seems. I'd guess he took some subjects with him after it closed down and continued his experiments.

Darius: And the one who dished out those orders was exactly as you guessed, Nica— Johannes Wolfgang.

Dari gave a bright smile, spreading out a map and pointing at Europe.

Darius: It seems Wolfgang is somewhere in Europe. His family back in Germany is searching for him now.

Darius: But said search's slow at best. They haven't reached any leads.

Darius: I figured you'd be able to pin him down faster, but…well, I guess it can't be helped.

Dari made a sad look, but that was when a certain idea occurred to me.

(This might be my chance.)

I could get away from this country— and disappear from the Spatzi with this.

(The next time she gets hit with a stroke of bad luck…I'll return to Germany and join the search for Wolfgang.)

I couldn't swear any eternal love or a happy future to her.

But, I couldn't help but want her, the one and only person in my life who had fallen in love with me for who I really was, to find happiness.

And to do that, there was one thing I could do.

[BLACK]

—I would let go of your hand.

t. b. c ⸝⸝

masterlist 🍒 ┊ ko-fi ☕️ ┊ comms 🤍

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NOTES:

[1] Nica uses the word [〜の二の舞] (—no ni no mai), which means "a repeat of something" but with the added connotation that what that "something" is was a mistake or something he holds more regretful feelings toward…in this case, he seems to be implying those feelings toward Ring.

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