2026 is the year my life fell apart. On January 18th I dropped everything and flew across the country, where my mom received the diagnosis that shattered all our worlds. I could hardly bring myself to hear the prognosis, just hearing terminal I couldn’t handle knowing anymore. Almost 2 months into this new reality, looking into clinical trials and reading aloud I accidentally recite the truth I’ve been avoiding: 95% survive beyond 5 yrs.. and I want to scream. Average age of diagnosis: 64. I want to wake up from this nightmare. And I THOUGHT I knew sadness, ha ha ha.. wait until the person who gave you life is fighting for their life. Something inside of you shatters and it’s the sharpness that keeps you awake. I feel more desperate for life than ever before and I also feel like I can hardly bring myself to care about anything, that what is the point when we are faced with such insurmountable odds.. 😢 it has been painful, to say the least 😭 and any bit of kindness touches my heart in a way I’ll never forget 💗 it’s hard to say the words out loud, I find myself choking up, and I’d rather keep it to myself bc it’s so hard for me to express. All that to say.. Please be kind and gentle with ppl, bc you never know what they carry inside 😢
