Hopelessly devoted to Miraxus

It was hard to guess what she could be thinking.

She hadn’t looked at him since the day before. Not literally. She had looked at him a few times but with those glassy empty eyes that seemed to barely look past him. He had stared at her, or maybe he only thought he did, it was hard to tell since she hardly seemed to notice. She had smiled at him a bit sweetly in the morning when everyone was still barely oozing up. She was already awake, already almost dressed and ready to go. How she did that was almost as puzzling as her attitude towards him.

That was the only real eye contact he had had with her all day. Even when fiery brain and iron cast were fighting for their lives in the arena she hadn’t sent one look in his direction, only continued to smile and joke around with her guildmates from the guild balcony. Maybe that was why he used to like her old self better, the hate seemed to be universal. Or maybe he just liked hate a lot better than indifference. He tried not to think about it too much as dumb and dumber started fighting against each other in front of the whole crowd. He sighed as loudly as he could because that was almost as big as a humiliation.

This whole week had been messed up. Between Jellal and his guild asking them to break the rules to reveal some secret dark magic use, Raven Tail attacking their members, Sabertooth going psycho in front of the public and now their forced merging that already seemed doomed. It was a wonder how he could find time to think about anything else. Not to forget the way too long celebrations that ended in so much alcohol and chaos, his liver and ear drums already felt their age despite having not reached their twenty-four birthday yet.

It was exhausting. Not the competing, because it was mostly waiting around than real fighting. He had yet to face a real opponent. Although he hoped the last day would be his occasion to finally try his luck on Jura. He only admitted it in his head because he had learned what being too cocky could do to him, but he wished he could go against him, just to see if all those years of relentless training had finally paid and allowed him to go face to face with one of the tens. Because that was his goal now.

He no longer wished of leadership but he still craved some kind of recognition. Some achievement he could call his. He still wanted to fight the best. He still wanted to win, for himself and for the guild. Publicly. The fact that the Lamia Scale wizard saint had just crushed star boy’s attempts at getting the victory was only the cherry on top. Even if the poor guy hadn’t been able to show a tenth of what he was truly capable of. Still, victory would be sweet. If he didn’t also get his head crushed into the sand.

At least, it couldn’t possibly be as humbling as being beaten by the two dumbasses throwing each other in carts. Nothing could be.

Maybe the old man would get understanding and allow him to go bang their heads together to see if it did sound as hollow as he thought. But no. The old man seemed too taken in his conversation with his head barmaid and personal assistant to even notice the looks of desperation he tried sending.

She noticed. She knew he was staring in her direction. He knew she did because she had that way of tilting her head whenever she was trying to ignore him. He sighed even louder, ignoring himself the comprehensive looks Erza was trying to get from him as she probably ached too from the poor behaviour of her own teammate that appeared to have decided that defeat as one was better than victory as two. Maybe he still hadn’t digested his victory against the thunder dragon slayer and didn’t want to see yet another victory taken from his hand. That he could understand. If it wasn’t utterly stupid in the current situation.

Almost as stupid as his own current situation, taken between looking at what could be a very good fight or the definite death of his ego, and what was definitely the death of all pride, because how else would you call endlessly staring at someone that gave so much effort at acting like you didn’t exist ? How else would you call the almost teenaged way he tried so much to look at her without catching the eye of his own grandfather chatting away with her. He felt like he was thirteen again, sneaking peeks into his pin up magazines’ collection without the old man noticing.

And it felt horrible. He wondered why everyone always called it thrilling or rejuvenizing. He felt like the weight of the world was pounding on his stomach and he had no pride to soften the blow. Like he was drowning in a constant embarrassment that jumped at his throat whether he looked at the arena or at the balcony, like whatever he looked at only reminded him of the scarce situation he had managed to get himself into. It felt rather pitiful.

He didn’t know if he felt prouder for Natsu or for himself when the pink haired mage finally finished the two dragon slayers with that one last blow. He didn’t know if he felt happier for the guild, for the boy he had seen grow up during his teenage years, or for the end of the miserable state he was trapped in, for giving him some reason to still walk with his head high in the tavern that they called home for the week.

Sometimes he was afraid of how selfish that made him. He did give him a smile as a thank you, but the young mage was so beaming and gloating at everyone that he hardly seemed to notice. He didn’t take it to heart, there was hope. At least he could now focus on his main problem of the time, which took the form of a very smiley and airy woman at the moment.

She was still ignoring him, while she was sitting at the same table. It was impressive. The way she never looked at his direction for more than a glance and only engaged with his two best friends that seemed way too interested in her opinion about the right ways to cook cauliflower to be honest about it. Maybe he was the only one that thought it very hard to concentrate on whatever she was saying when her eyes were sparkling like that about cauliflowers.

Freed, he could understand because he did like cooking, but Bickslow he couldn’t believe in it, the guy had more interest in the political meaning behind the ups and downs of the stock market than he had about anything that came close to cooking, and he had never seen him even get close to a finance newspaper. From the glances he was giving her, it wasn’t her eyes either he seemed to be interested in. He wondered what excuse he could come up with to smack him on the head right there and now. A smoke would calm his nerves, he only thought as he suddenly got up with his hand already going through his pocket, catching the surprised stares of the entire table.  

“Are you going outside ?” Her voice echoed, almost startling him as she hadn’t said a word to him during the whole day.

“Yeah.” He only responded, already blocking a cigarette between his lips. He just couldn’t wait. “On the balcony upstairs.” He somehow gestured.

“Good. I’ll go with you, then.” Her smile got very wide at that as she beamed up, so much so he almost missed the silent treatment. It was less ominous. “I need some air.” She sent him one of those looks as she straightened her dress up to get rid of the wrinkles that seemed to imprint faster than lightning on those tavern benches.

He was almost against it, because that definitely felt like a trap. But his mind wasn’t quick enough to come up with a good reason to forbid her in front of the whole table that seemed to find the pairing interesting enough to stop talking ²all the while they made their way out of the main room and to the stairs. She really was exhausting just to think about.

When they got outside, he didn’t say anything at first, only lit a cigarette, leant on the railing of the balcony and stared into the lights of the city in the most intense silence he could manage. She didn’t seem to be that concerned with his little performance because she only took off her shoes, vaguely complained about how much her feet were hurting and sat down on the balcony with her legs swaying into the open air. He noticed her cheeks were flushed, but that could just be the alcohol, probably not their weird encounter from the day before. He tried to be modest about it.

The silence was heavy, though. The only thing coming out in the air was the smoke he was exhaling and the light humming from her mouth as she lightly recalled some old melody he probably had already heard down there.

Fine, he would be the one talking then. If she didn’t have the guts to start.

“So” His voice was a lot more shaky than he had meant to, which was not at all. “Did you want to talk about something ?” It was getting harder not to feel like a thirteen year old again.

She turned her head toward him with those little sway and smile she got when she was playing innocent and clueless.

“Can’t I just enjoy the fresh air of a beautiful summer evening ?” He would have believed it if her voice didn’t have that slight shake too.

“Really ? That’s how you want to play it ?” He asked with the snarkiest tone he could gather, so she would understand how annoyed her little fake tone was making him.

She probably got the message because her smile dropped then as she looked up to him, still leaning on the railing, and her legs stopped swaying. A few years ago, she would have gotten instantly mad. But now, she only sighed and looked away, visibly torn but not totally leaving the happy mask behind.

“I guess I just saw an opening and jumped on it.” She lightly grinned as she still stared into the darkness. He was almost startled by the frankness he honestly almost forgot to exhale the smoke he had just breathed. “We don’t have to talk about it if you don’t want to.”

“Who said I don’t want to ?” He almost responded too quickly to keep the nonchalant attitude he desperately tried to project.

“Well, your tone, I guess.” Her voice got shakier but she was looking at him now even he tried his hardest look away from her, as to not get caught in those eyes that almost seemed to make him stupider than he was supposed to be. “Your face, also.”

He took it out then, his done cigarette, on the wood of the balcony and then under his feet, then he turned but not towards her, he turned his back to the sky to stare at the door letting a crown of light showing through the gaps as the sounds of the party and the yelling only got louder and louder. It seemed like mayhem in there, even more so than the other nights, if that even was possible. But he knew he was only deflecting from the serious discussion she was trying to have. Even though he had wished she would finally acknowledge something all day, he weirdly felt a lot more nervous now that she had done so.

“Do we really need to talk about it ?” He only sighed, still trying to fix the shaking in his voice that was higher than usual.

“I guess not.” She sighed too, looked away again back to the city lights with the same tender grin she had all day. Only it seemed realer now, because her eyes felt a lot less glassy. “Not this week at least, it probably should wait until this whole week is over.”

He grunted. His fingers were shaking and he wanted another cigarette. But he couldn’t get one out or she would scold him about his health or whatever. It’s not like he could explain to her why he desperately needed a second one by now.

“I’m sorry.”

He couldn’t help but jilt his head this time, to stare into the depth of her soul even if she was now committed to staring into the dark night and purposely avoiding his glare. He didn’t understand it, the apology, although he had been waiting for one the entire night, this one didn’t make sense. His waiting didn’t make sense. He didn’t know what acknowledgement he wanted out of her but this wasn’t it.

“I don’t think last night was entirely your fault.” He responded in this higher pitched voice he so loathed and wanted to get rid off, but somehow it was coming out of him faster than he could think.

She laughed a bit, nervously, only glancing at him before going back to staring at the starry sky.

“I’m sorry about leaving like that.” Her voice was getting a lot shakier then, almost trembling as she nervously playing with the black fabric of her dress.

He liked that dress. He didn’t know what it said about him but he genuinely liked it. Black, with those white frills on the end, and the slit that slightly showed her guild mark on her thigh, it was hot. He couldn’t explain why because it wasn’t particularly revealing, or daring or even elegant but it was hotter than what she usually wore. He had seen her wearing much more scandalous clothes back when she couldn’t get out of her house without a top so short, everybody wondered why she didn’t just go out in a bathing suit like Cana did. But this one was a different kind of hot. Just different.

“I- I don’t mean last night”. She started stuttering and blushing, and now she was getting cute fidgeting her hands in the dark fabric while he stared dumbfounded at what was probably the least expected conversation he hoped to have all night “I mean, for that too, but… especially for back then. You didn’t deserve that and…” She flustered her way down the sentence. “I’m sorry.”

She tried to say the last one with every bit of confidence she could manage to get out to look at his eyes while she articulated the words. He didn’t say anything. He didn’t know what to say because he didn’t know what he felt about this whole conversation. Because he had tried very hard not to even think about the eventuality of it the whole time. He didn’t answer, he just stared into those dark blue eyes that were now staring into the depth of his soul while he tried to gather some thoughts and feelings about the whole situation.

It was a lie. He may not have known what he was thinking about it but he definitely knew how he was feeling about it. He could hear the blood pounding in his hears and feel the clench of his chest sinking into his guts. he definitely felt the wobbliness in his knees and the sour almost burning dryness in his tongue and throat. He could hear his heart’s hollow going batshit crazy behind his ribcage and he definitely felt the adrenaline rush to his fingers that started trembling as his brain scrambled to decide on a course of action.

Fuck, she got him again. Fucking demon, and fuck those eyes that made him forget how to breath. Fuck. Just fuck them all.

.

“Mirajane, open this door.” He tried very hard not to bang on the door but the silence that met his words made the blood run even quicker in his hands.

He could hear her breathe. He never told her how good his hearing really was. He never told her anything about his other senses as well, or his true magic. He had never told anyone. Not either the so-called Thunder Legion that followed him around for almost a year now. Now that they would stop because of it, if one thing, it would make it harder to go somewhere without them. If he told them. But today, even a deaf guy would have heard her in his place.

She was breathing, sighing, almost moaning, she was crying too, that he could hear clearly. She wasn’t far too, probably just on the other side of the door, sitting down with her back against it and probably her knees against her chest like she would sometimes do. He could almost see her in his mind as he continued to hear the muffled cries just across the wood that seemed so thin and yet so thick at the moment.

He could bang on it, but then she would probably leave and go upstairs. He could just open it by force but then he risked throwing the door on her head and she wasn’t exactly in a state to dodge or block it at the moment. It would hurt her. It would only add to the pain she was feeling and probably get him definitely banished from ever stepping into her space again and that was what he was desperately trying to avoid right now. That was why he was standing in front of her house like a desperate lost dog although he hated every second of it.

“Mirajane, can you just open so we can talk about it ?” He tried very hard to let his tone get too commanding or aggressive. He had a tendency to do that these days when he was annoyed and it had a tendency to scare people off or get them to cry even harder. He just never thought she could be one of these people. He knocked again and he could hear how annoyed the knock probably felt, but that was all he could manage. “I  just want to talk, okay ?”

She was still crying, louder than before. His stomach was turning apart because he truly hated to hear her cry for every possible reason that could be invented. His chest was aching because of how hard he had to keep the adrenaline from going to his fists. His throat was getting a little too desperate too from burying the screams that he wanted to let out. “Can you at least look at me when we talk ?”

Nothing. Just the cries and the muffled moans again.

“Mirajane.”

More moans. More cries and more hiccups from the breaths she was struggling to take.

He knew it was his fault. He knew he wasn’t the right person for the situation. He shouldn’t have gone looking for her when Erza told him that she was missing. He still had his traveling bag and his old clothes on his back when he went through the forest to find her. Hell, he shouldn’t even have gone to her house once he learnt about what happened. When the old man had told him about the job and the accident, her sister dead, and her brother in jail waiting for trial he almost lost his brain for a second.

Erza was already waiting for her when he got there. She told him she barely got out of bed for the last three days yet nobody had seen her since the morning. She didn’t even seem that worried, waiting in the living room, saying how she probably needed some air to clear her head and would probably be back before the night. He almost punched the stupidity out of her but his priority had been to turn back to find her.

It had been easy. His nose wasn’t that good compared to the salamander but it was still a lot better than a normal human. He knew how she smelt. He had smelt her enough back in the days where she sometimes stalked him around to check on his whereabouts, completely unaware that his senses picked up her presence way before she even got afraid of it. She was good at following people, but her overconfidence in having all the information doomed her every time. It only took him a few minutes to pick up her sense going in the forest and no more than twenty minutes to find her with that trace.

She was sitting on the cliff, the one that faced the lake and made it look like a very calm ocean. Her white hair was untied and fleeting with the cold wind. It was raining. The air was cold because it was late autumn and the grey sky let a light rain cover the rock. When she felt his presence, she turned around and stared. He only had time to notice how red and puffy her eyes were from the days of wallowing before she broke down into tears again while staring at him.

He hadn’t planned for the rest to happen. Not that way, at least. He had taken her back to his place because she was wet from the rain, and she needed a hot shower, and Erza was waiting back at her place, and maybe he was making up excuses for him but it was just so desperately hard to comfort someone so desperate for love without letting your true feelings out. She wasn’t that young anymore. She hadn’t seem so distraught after everything happened, before he went to sleep after four days of her hanging around his apartment, she even looked quite happy, as happy as she could be in the situation.

Maybe he should have known better. Maybe he shouldn’t have called Erza to tell her he was handling it. Maybe he should have had the strength to push her away when the white-haired kissed him even though he knew how heartbroken she always looked the few other times she had tried. Maybe he just cared a lot more about her that he was ready to say out loud. Maybe he had been lying to himself for the past year when he told himself that she was just some very hot demon he kind of liked more than other people.

It was his fault. He was trying to fix it now, tell her there was no need to panic and that he understood how serious it was and that he was not going to let her face it all by herself. If they were doing this, then it was ride or die for him. He wasn’t one of these people that didn’t stand behind their decisions and went back to normal after it. He just wasn’t. She was going to let him in, and he was going to help her through the whole grief. He didn’t care what the useless fools back in the guild, or the thunder legion, or his grandfather had to say about it. He would help her.

He heard her jump at the loud banging his hands made in the door. The first time. the second time he banged he could barely hear her move slightly, probably burying her head into her knees. The third time he banged, Nothing. She didn’t move, she still cried but nothing. The fourth time he honestly fought he was going to break down the door although he was trying not to. “Mira, just open it, please.”

There was a silence, a long break where he could no longer hear her crying, he almost had hope. But it was just that, silence. She didn’t move, he could barely hear her cry anymore. He was trying really hard to care about who could see him in so pathetic a position and swallowed away his pride barely containing his anger. He banged again almost screamed this time, but his lungs felt too heavy.

“Mira.”

He didn’t really understand what he had done so wrong. She seemed calm and happy before this whole thing. He had fallen asleep quite peacefully while she was all settled in his arms. She was wearing his old metal t-shirt that was way too big for her. He remembered her body felt skinnier in his hands because she hadn’t been eating right for the past week although he tried to stuff her with sandwiches and pastries every chance he got for the last four days.

He remembered her left arm still had claws and golden scales that felt cold on his fingers because she had troubles keeping her magic under control because of the nightmares. He thought there couldn’t be anything hotter than to see the purple light and claws shine out whenever she was trembling with pleasure. She didn’t see it that way, always apologized anytime it happened and rushed a few minutes later to get cotton pads for the scratches she made on his arms and back. He didn’t know if her arm had gone back to normal when she left while he was sleeping.

It was wrong. This whole situation was wrong, and ridiculous. He felt like he had reached the highest point of humiliation that he was willing to tolerate. You couldn’t help someone that didn’t want to help. You couldn’t force someone to accept your care and affection if they remained so hard-set on keeping you out of their space. You couldn’t spend days banging on a door if they wished it would be a wall. You just couldn’t. He wouldn’t do it.

“Fine. Do what you want.”

It wasn’t raining anymore. The air was still cold, but the sun was shining a weak light through the clouds into the town. He heard a thunder crack, and then another. His anger had called a storm. It happened sometimes. Not that he cared, it wasn’t even going to rain so it was a problem for anyone but him. He walked again towards the guild trying to ignore the muffled cries that he could still hear behind the door as he made his way though the town.

He didn’t really care anymore. Or he did because his stomach still hurled inside whenever the sound came in contact with his ears. But he wasn’t going to do anything about it. He had jobs to do and ambitions to fulfil. If she wanted space and to be alone during this time, if she regretted everything and never wanted to speak to him ever again, it was fine, he could handle being the villain. He was already the villain for a lot of people. He could handle her anger but the only thing he could never tolerate was her indifference.

.

He knew how he felt but he didn’t know how to act. He never asked for an apology, if anything he was the one that had to apologize for the way he had acted once he came back from his job. She always found a way to unsettle him, take down his defence with some new angle he wasn’t aware existed. That’s why he used to like training with her, she was unpredictable. If there was a weakness in his defence, he could count on her to find it. He only wished she would tone it down from time to time.

“Okay. Thanks.”

She didn’t answer. She smiled sweetly before going back to staring into the darkness. He got a new cigarette out. He didn’t care what she would say or the slight way she frowned when she saw it. She didn’t think they were healthy, although she used to smoke with him way before this whole mess. He always wondered how someone could change her mind so quick about something. He would suffer through her judgement. He needed it. He had had a very stressful day to say the least, his ego had.

“Tough day?” She humoured while he lit it and breathed out the first puff.

He only grinned and nodded his head. She was staring at him now, not waiting for anything, just staring while he sucked the smoke in to calm his nerves. It was unsettling, but not as much as other things she had done. He could bear it. Still, he couldn’t figure out why she still stared right into his soul. Maybe she wasn’t really okay with keeping this conversation for after the Games. Maybe she was worried if he had understood her apology or expected some other acknowledgement for it. He wouldn’t give it. He needed some kind of revenge.

“Do you want one?” He only asked as she continued to glare at him.

She finally looked away, back into the stars. Then she got her shoes on back again before standing up and leaning across the bars like he had done just before. She was only a few feet from him but crossing the distance seemed like a very dangerous game right now. Or maybe she was waiting for him to man up and do something. or maybe he should be concerned about starting to talk like Elfman. It was genuinely worrying.

“You know I don’t like the smell.” She only replied with that little laugh without glancing at him. it was his turn to stare, still deciding if this whole situation was some sort of opening he should take advantage of. None of them was drunk, for once. He still worried somebody would go up the stairs and found them in a compromising position. He hadn’t heard Cana go up last time because he had been too distracted to care. Maybe trying again would be pushing it.

“You used to like it.” He shrugged, trying to innocently lean back on the bars closer to where she was leaning. Just to see if she would stand back or let him get closer, trying to ignore the fact that he had just graduated from a thirteen-year old’s behaviour to a fifteen-year old’s. Things were looking up.

“I used to like a lot of things.” She didn’t move away, only glared at him with that knowing slight grin. He also smiled a bit. Because it felt good to joke about it.

“Yeah, I know.” He said low, almost whispered. Just to see the slight blush come to her cheeks as she started laughing lightly.

“Just tell me something.” He suddenly said, biting his tongue because he knew that was the time where she should definitely shut up before he said anything stupid that would get her mad.

“What?” She grinned even wider, with that curious light into the deep blue eyes that always lit up whenever gossip was involved.

He didn’t ask too fast, in fact he very voluntarily and obviously got even closer with his back still on the racks as she stared. She let him, the curious light still shining, getting suspicious of his intentions like all the times he liked to play with her feelings with some snide flirting remark he knew would make her redder than a tomato and so mad she would either punch him or leave very angrily. He always thought it was funny, how fast she would get flustered and immediately assume he was making fun of her. The downside was she would never flirt back with him, unless she was drunk, or high, or very very mad.

He still took the risk and got even closer, brushing against the cold, sweet skin of her left arm. He felt her tense up, but she didn’t move, only kept staring into his eyes while hers got darker as the suspicions grew into her head and she was getting ready to react. Maybe she would punch him, although that was going to be difficult to explain to the others downstairs, or maybe she would just go for his biggest insecurity and snark back. She could be kind of a bully sometimes. He tried to stop wondering as he leaned in and whispered against her ear.

“When you’re alone, do you still think about me like that sometimes?” He had meant it to be flirty, but he was already getting ready for the backlash as she very obviously tensed up with her eyes widened.

She didn’t punch though, nor did she get angry. Instead, she turned very slowly to face him with a snarky grin that almost scared him to death. She didn’t get flustered. She slightly blushed but her voice was unsettlingly very steady, like she was robbing him of the effect he was trying to get out of her. Instead, she snatched the cigarette from his mouth and brought it to hers before he had time to even complain about it. Not that he truly wanted to. She took one breath in without losing his offended stare, then she gave it back.

“Sometimes.” She grinned then, just a little while he only frowned. Then, she turned her back and walked towards the door with a slight laugh he wouldn’t have caught if it wasn’t for his hearing, before disappearing behind it. The light had the time to shine entirely on him and then go completely dark with a slight bang before he remembered to breathe.

And she felt horrible about it.

If someone had asked her to elaborate, she would have said that his moves weren’t the good ones, they were good moves but they weren’t his good moves. The way he dodged felt off. The way he stroke felt off. People around her only seemed concerned because he wasn’t easily winning like they all expected. She would have said it wasn’t that he wasn’t winning as predicted, she would have said it was that he wasn’t moving as predicted.

She couldn’t predict a single move the man made, not a single reaction. None of them felt familiar. And that was the weirdest, because she used to be familiar with the way he fought. She used to be so familiar with it, it was almost comforting to see him fight. The second of knowing she got when he sent Natsu flying across the room was comforting, because she knew it was coming, because she knew which direction he would be sent flying, because she knew the form his arm would take when sending him, because it always felt like him.

And now it didn’t. And that tore her stomach in half.

Maybe it was her. Maybe she was the one that didn’t know him anymore. Maybe he had evolved so much she had just lost complete touch with him. Maybe the only thing she could predict about him now was his bored moves he didn’t even bother to make surprising. Maybe she didn’t know him at all anymore. It terrified her.

Because despite it all, despite the endless fights and his most terrible decisions, she always felt like she still knew him, like the one she had loved was still under there, that after a time he would come back to normal and he would be like he used to be, on the rare occasions when he used to be chill and not so much of an jerk, when he wasn’t performing his asshole act to make sure everyone despised him, when he used to be her friend. Sometimes her only friend.

Maybe he was gone.

Despite being back and actually trying to make some peace with the guild.

Maybe that was the price she had to pay for him not being an asshole anymore. Maybe she just had to lose him completely. In order to have him back.

That was terrifying.

.

She barely had the time to see his arm before it went crashing into her face, sending her flying against the tree that just happened to be standing nearby. Her back crashed too. So hard she didn’t even have energy left to make an agonizing cry. She lost her transformation. That was her weakness, one strike just hard enough and she couldn’t hold it anymore. She always felt so weak when she felt the power leaving her veins as her face hit the ground. She always felt so small when he looked at her, towering her with all his height. She almost hated how sexy he looked with his sweaty t-shirt on, most times without a t-shirt on.

“Your left is still way too open, with the right timing it’s like a highway for a fist, you know.” He said, not gloating, just patiently pointing out what he found as usual.

He liked doing that. Asshole.

She smiled as she sat back up and rubbed her neck with an agonizing face, almost chuckling as he sat in front of her and conjured a bottle of water out. He was almost as red and out of breath as she was.

“You worked out quite a sweat getting the right timing then.” She smirked, handing her hand out so she could get some of his water too.

She had her own bottle tucked somewhere but she liked the way he never minded giving her some of his. Like it was normal. Like she was entitled to his water. At least she liked to pretend that she was.

“Well, you’re getting faster.” He smirked as he watched her down some of the liquid without a breath. “But seriously though, you have to work on that, in a real fight, that’s a death trap, especially if you can’t keep your magic going after.”

He looked at her seriously then, almost bawling his eyes out as he took the bottle back and conjured it in his requip space back.

“I know, I know.” She sighed with a grin and a shrug, still out of breath and her back still killing her. She might have to check for bleeding when she got back home.

“Then why isn’t it fixed already ?”

“ I tried !” She almost cried out with a small smile. “But then my right opens up even faster.”

He laughed then, lightly, but she always find it was a beautiful sound. Not an often sound though.

“I promise I’ll get my left closed off for the trials.”

He smirked then. He always did when she mentioned the S-class trials. It was going to be her second time around. Even if she had to grind her teeth just to admit it. After her defeat against Erza last year, she felt like the year had just been a whole humiliating experience watching the redhead pass the blonde on the second floor while she was stuck on the ground. Her rival never missed an opportunity to make a comment to her when she came back down to get her job registered at the bar. The white-haired never responded though, just sighed and pretended nobody knew how jealous she was.

“You better.” He chuckled as he got a cigarette out and lit it up. “Otherwise I’m going to wipe the floor with your face.”

She pretended to be scandalized.

“Who said I’m even going to fight you.”

He chuckled even louder.

“Oh, I do, I can feel it.” He almost whispered. “I definitely hope so.” He mouthed while holding the cigarette up for her.

She made a sound then. Something between a chuckle and a smirk to hide the panic that took her everytime she realized that was a possibility. The cigarette felt hard against her lips. Like her lungs weren’t quite back on from the fight to sustain it. She never liked the smell. She liked the feeling. Sometimes. Especially when he was to the one to share with her.

“Well, I don’t.” She sighed as she pass it back and ignored the chuckle that followed.

“I’ll take that as a compliment.” He only said as he got back up, not letting out an arm to help back up too. “You’re ready for round two ?”

She had to hoard her ass back up by herself. And it hurt.

“Oh, you know me.” She smiled too as she watched him back down to the back of the glade they used for their training sessions. It was back in the forest where no other members came for their own training. He didn’t even bring his three new pets here. In fear of finding them here waiting for him, when he wanted to be alone or so he said. He didn’t seem to mind finding her training by herself though. Although their schedules made the occasion so rare. “I was born for it.”

It took her a lot of effort to ignore his handsome smile and dodge his first strike.

.

There were no words to describe how relieved she felt when the illusion spell vanished. When she saw the five Raven Tail members all squashed on the floor, it was like the weight of the world was lifted from her shoulders. She could hardly hide it too. She was beaming, jumping in the air as the whole crowd cheered with her. She could swear she also saw some tear in the master’s eye, but she was almost tearing up too, as well as the Thunder Legion that looked like they had just comme back from the fear of their life.

No one minded her. They were too busy cheering as well as the blonde casually walked back through the center of the arena under the noise of the crowd and the bafflement of the Games organizers that stuttered their confusion about the obvious cheating that had taken place under everyone’s watchful eyes. She didn’t even care about the cheating, she felt stupid for them, for his father that obviously had zero idea about who he provoked.

But she knew.

The whole time she had known.

It didn’t feel like him because it hadn’t been him. Because despite the time, despite their problems, he was still the one she knew, and she was still the one that knew him.

She felt high.

It was like the whole guild had caught her state when they arrived at the ihn. After all it was their first big day of victory with Erza and Laxus being the big stars of the day. Although people never missed their opportunity to congratulate Wendy on her draw against a most talented opponent.

She had made a detour to go see her brother that was still lying in his hospital bed, recovering from his fight from the day before. The Thunder Legion had been there too, she even suspected that Evergreen had made plans to go back later after congraluating Laxus on his crushing victory of the day. Her poor brother was still in a bad shape, barely able to get out of his bed and certainly not able to stand for very long as the bandages drastically restrained his possibilities.

At least he was alright.

Her sister too seemed alright as she also beamed out of the hospital room, still talking about the combats of the day. Maybe years ago Mirajane would have felt jealous of the admirative way she went on and on about Erza’s daring attitude and about how cool she had looked when she had decided to take all the monsters at once and won, or about how Laxus had looked the coolest when he destroyed his competition and went back calmly as if he hadn’t been supposed to be crushed by an unfair advantage.

Obviously they were the coolest people on the planet right now. At least within their knowledge. Maybe some years ago her heart would have sunk. But surprisingly she didn’t even mind it now. She quite agreed as well. She didn’t mind the way her sister practically flew through the room to praise the redhead and beam around the blonde.

He didn’t seem to mind her either, he looked almost soft when he patiently waited for her to finish her long lines of praise and only tapped on her head some more before bringing the bottle of beer to his lips as her sister joined the Thunder Legion at the table against whom he was standing. His half smile looked amused and proud, but she caught something else in his eyes, something that looked like a shadow, like the shadow he had when he regretted some asshole comment he made at her, back when he still did that.

He barely even looked at her when she came to congratulate him right after. Barely even smiled, almost only sighed and shrugged at her words.

“Almost disappointed really.” He half joked there before her questioning stare. “I remembered him stronger you know.” He chuckled then before deporting his attention to Gray and Juvia that had made their way to the table to partake in the congratulations line, only sending a slight glance in her direction as she too made her way to the table. Not quite knowing if she should ask him to elaborate on that. At least she knew it was probably best to leave it alone for now.

At least she knew.

He had always been like that, sending some distress signals in the form of half jokes before going away or starting on something completely different. He always processed like that. She knew she should just leave him alone with it until he felt like sharing his thoughts with anyone.

There was something so reassuring in knowing.

She liked the way his eyebrows went up and down as the people came going to him after one another. She knew he was surprised that Erza made her way up to him despite her own line of people to personally praise him and almost smile like they were friends. She also tried not to grind her teeth when she saw the half smile of pride he gave the redhead. She pretended she didn’t mind that he was giving those to someone else.

Because she was the only to know how annoyed he was at the noise, and how baffled he was to see people from outside the guild show up to the inn to join his line of congratulations. She knew he was getting thirsty because he was licking his lips in between slight remarks and because his bottle had been empty for a while now. She knew how his eyes would wander across the room in the hope of an escape to get a drink at the bar. She knew he lied when the master asked him if he was okay because one of his eyebrow suddenly went up. Because she knew that was his tell.

She was getting slightly annoyed at them now, although she wasn’t showing most of it, still smiling and almost beaming at Freed and Bickslow that painfully tried to make conversation with her and Lisanna. Thank god for Cana and her non stop stock of anecdotes because she was practically holding up the conversation by herself, and that was impressive, even though the brunette was getting her own share of congratulating from the people that came to Laxus first. She didn’t seem to be taking that much credit for what was her own exploit of the day.

But how was she annoyed.

Not at Cana, at the two men that kept on trying to talk to her when their boss, their friend, was obviously not doing good. She almost wanted to yell at them. She thought about hinting at it but something about the dragon’s slayer hearing and the way he kept sending glances in her direction somehow discouraged her. She wanted to squash them herself. With her own two hands and her beaming smile that seemed plastered on her face for hours now. But no, she just kept on smiling.

She reached her limit when they almost had no reaction when the dragon slayer suddenly left his post next to the table to make his way to the bar. Only glanced at the blonde’s back before returning to their painful conversation that she was hardly listening to anyway. She kept on glancing at him though, watching his moves as he clumsily slalomed between the tables and the crowd to order. She didn’t see what he ordered though, but from the weight of the bottle on his arm, she guessed it wasn’t a bottle of beer, but something way stronger.

She didn’t stop smiling at the two men as she kept on glancing at him making his way back, but she definitely frowned when he made a turn and went for the stairs with the bottle in his hand instead of going back to their tables. She looked at them, the two men that were supposed to be his friends, that were supposed to be here for him when he was down. They didn’t even seem to notice that Laxus was gone, only kept on staring at Cana and Lisanna that seemed lost in some gruesome story from some years ago. She hardly had listened to anything really. But something was wrong with him. She just knew.

So that was the moment she chose to get up.

She followed him, he was quick but she rapidly understood he was going for their team’s room. He probably wanted to be alone, why else would he go there knowing everyone else was down at the bar ready to celebrate him ? When she got before the door, she hesitated. Her hand stopped on the handle and she wondered if he would be happy to see that she cared, or if she was going to be told off once again. He had a habit of telling her off when she got too close.

She took a big sigh but she didn’t want to back down. She knew him. He could seem solitary and mean but he liked having people around, people that cared for him. She knew he’d tell her off but she hoped he would be happy that she still cared. Maybe her feelings didn’t matter that much right now, maybe what mattered the most after him fighting his own father was knowing he had other people.

She paused and violently pushed the door as if she was jumping into cold water. She only made one step inside before her feet and her breath stopped. The window was open, so she thought he would be smoking on the window but he was lying on his bed facing the wall and turned away from her. His torso was slowly going up and down, maybe he was asleep. A quick glance told her that the bottle she had seen in his hand was now on his nightstand, barely opened.

“What do you want, demon ?” His cold voice startled her as she heard the door softly closing behind her.

She took a pause to stabilize her breathing and her heart she could hear stomping inside her. She hated how being alone with him always had such a big effect on her. Even if it was the millionth time since she had met him.

“I saw you go up, I wanted to check if you were okay.” She replied in a soft voice while she took some steps to sit on her bed in front of his. His back still turned to her.

She heard him chuckle and immediately felt a clenching feeling grip her insides. Because she immediately knew he was in no mood to open up, and this could very quickly become a fight. But she decided, as every other time, that she wasn’t going to let it go that easy. Maybe one day she would learn, but not today.

“What wouldn’t I be okay ?” That was his mean voice, his sarcastic tone she so hated. She almost wanted to smother him with her pillow when his back turned and his mean gaze met hers. She didn’t let him intimate her with his nonchalant attitude. She knew him too much to get caught in that trap.

“Are you okay ?” She insisted as well with her eyes, not letting him look away.

He chuckled again and only shrugged before turning his back to her again. She felt herself frown and her jaw clenched. Not that she was pissed but he always made it so difficult to care about him.

“I wouldn’t be okay if my father had tricked me into fighting him in front of a whole arena.” She didn’t elevate her voice because she knew how quickly this could escalate, and she was going to break him.

“I thought your father spent his life cultivating carrots before dying of some disease nobody gets anymore.” He snorted.

His words made her want to hurt him. Because he knew she loved her father and she knew he was deliberately trying to hurt her so she would back off and leave him in his misery. But she wouldn’t let him, because he had admitted how hurt he truly was.

“Oh, he did.” She snorted back. “But it was actually cabbage, you know.”

She heard him chuckle again, but somehow his voice was less mean. His gaze was less piercing when he turned back to her to lay on his back. She laid on her side then. So he would know she wasn’t going anywhere anytime soon. No matter how much he wished to push her away to be miserable alone.

“Why are you here ?” He asked while staring at the ceiling. Purposely avoiding her her gaze that remained on his face.

“I want to know if you’re okay.” She replied with a steady voice, not shying away from her feelings. “You seemed weird downstairs.”

He sarcastically smiled again and it was definitely rubbing her the wrong way. But she didn’t let him. Today was the day she stopped letting him get on her nerves in order to avoid their connection. Because it existed, and no matter what she constantly told herself, it was still very much here, and apparently not going anywhere until something new happened.

“I’m fine.” He looked straight at her, as if he was trying to shy her away. But she held on, not looking away, not listening to her stomping heart going off in her chest that he was probably hearing right now.

“You don’t look fine.”

He laughed almost hysterically, at least for his usual self. Even more sarcastic that he had been before.

“What are you even asking if you’re not interested in my answer ?” He smiled at her while fingering his pockets, looking for the cigarette pack that was lying on his nightstand. His nerves obviously needed some steadying. But she didn’t look away, even if her brain was now screaming at her to let go and not chase after a painful fight whose consequences she would deal with for the rest of the week.

“I’m interested in any kind of answer that’s not a downright lie.” She sent back without missing a beat.

The blonde laughed again but more softly this time as he looked to the ceiling again, like he was almost satisfied with her attitude. Maybe he thought it funny that she could take feelings with the same kind of cunty attitude she reserved for his provocations years ago. He always liked when she didn’t back down from a fight.

“And you know that because took a telepathy class lately ?” He snorted, humouring her but somehow really asking. “You certainly have the time now.”

She recognized the provocation but somehow it didn’t even punch in her chest. She didn’t care anymore about not working as a mage, and she would never let him bully her into it again.

“Yeah, it was right after my pastry class.” She made her voice seem stupid, like she didn’t understand what he was trying to do. “You should try it sometimes, it’s very relaxing.”

He only smiled then, laughing silently as he put an arm behind his head. For a moment, there was only silent in the room, if you forgot about the distant uproar they could still hear from the bar downstairs. She even heard Erza’s voice making some speech in the distance. She sounded obviously drunk and she wondered how many members would not be totally hungover the next day.

“There was just too much noise, you know.” He said then and she realized she had looked away from him in her thoughts. “I’m fine, I just needed some silence for a change.”

He seemed a lot more honest at the moment, still staring at the ceiling with both his arms now crossed behind his head and his gaze seeming lost in the blank color. She wanted to ask if it was his dragon slayer hearing that made him more sensitive to the screams, but then she thought about Natsu that never seemed bothered by the noise, and pretty much was always the center of it. Or maybe he always screamed because he always heard everything louder too. She had never thought of it that way, but that didn’t explain Gajeel’s and Wendy’s more toned down attitude. Certainly explained why Laxus always had a pair of headphones on him though.

“I get it.” She almost whispered, staring up at the ceiling too now, ignoring his eyes looking for her face. “You had the longest day of us all.”

“I just remembered him stronger, you know ?”

She stopped there, hesitating on how to respond. Because she knew. She knew that was the only opening she was going to get for the night, and she really didn’t want to miss it. She knew she couldn’t be sarcastic because he would immediately close back up again. She knew she couldn’t be too empathetic because he would feel patronized and he hated that too. She couldn’t stay silent either because he would feel awkward. And she couldn’t keep overthinking it because she would get a headache.

“Did you remember him stronger, or did you just become stronger ?” She asked, she didn’t like her answer but the silence was getting awkward between then.

He sighed, not looking at her, still staring at the ceiling like he was avoiding the piercing gaze she was sending him.

“I don’t know.” He almost whispered, almost like lost in contemplation. “I never really fought him before.”

Now her brain was getting confused.

“I don’t get it.” She asked. “How can you remember him stronger if you never fought against him ?”

He smiled then, slightly. Like he acknowledged how ludicrous he was sounding.

“I don’t know.” He chuckled. “I remember seeing him fight, I think, it’s a little fuzzy.”

She smiled too, but just because she genuinely like how his teeth showed up. She always liked how pointy his fangs could seem and he smiled honestly.

“Fighting against whom ?” She sat up on the bed, letting her shoes fall down on the floor and slightly sighing as she felt the numbness through her legs. She was used to heels and only felt them when the pressure left her feet. She was his head turn slowly, barely looking at her face, and she couldn’t quite grasp if he was looking at her feet or at the skin showing when she lifted her skirt to get the shoes off. She hoped it was the latter.

“I don’t even remember.” He muttered before finally looking up from her legs to stare into her eyes, his mouth bare moving.

She slightly smiled then and casually assembled the skirt on on her lap, leaving even more of her legs appearing. She saw him chuckle again and was enjoying the way she could guess that he was keeping himself from looking down. She wasn’t feeling that hot too after an entire day in the arena. The emotions of the day had been intense and she wished she had jumped into the shower before joining the others at the bar.

“Do you wish he had been stronger ?” She asked as she crossed her legs and assembled the tissue between them.

“I wish he wasn’t an asshole.” He laughed, finally looking away to stare again at the ceiling. She wished he looked back at her again. She also wished he stopped looking so depressed because it was truly becoming heavy on her stomach. She didn’t like how his brows furrowed in worry and how dull he acted, as if the energy had flown off his body.

“Well, we all have wishes in life.” She replied, still not looking away from him, quietly enjoying the way he smiled again at her last remark.

“I guess.” He sighed while putting out the cigarette that had been going from his hand to his mouth. It reminded her how cold the air from the window was getting. “What’s your wish then ?”

She didn’t let out how startled she was at his last question, because she should have been expecting it. She should have expected that he would turn the discussion around when the topic got too intense. She only sighed and wondered if she should just let it go and let them go back to normal, to the way they ignored each other half the time, to the way they pretended not to know each other as people. She felt the weight of the task fall on her shoulders, and she just felt like she wasn’t ready to let him go just yet.

“I wish you stopped feeling so bad all the time.”

She could feel his heavy stare on her as she looked away to stare herself at the ceiling. Smiling a little because she knew his silence meant she had hit the right spot. He was either going to open up or get very quickly aggressive. She was up for both in total honesty. She didn’t feel like fighting.

“I thought you wished I learnt from my mistakes.” He startled her again but she only looked down to finally stare back into his dark eyes. Her heart was feeling sore when she truly hated how miserable he seemed at this very moment. She wished her magic had the capacity to make his spleen go away rather than grow claws into her hands.

“I wish you stopped suffering from them, that’s all.” She smiled truly, sweetly at him. Barely holding back the sadness from her eyes.

“So you don’t want me to redeem myself until I’m forgiven ?” He said it sarcastically but she knew he had never been more honest. She could hear the tension build up in his throat and she couldn’t deny it was getting quite unbearable inside her own chest.

“I wish you knew that you’re already forgiven.”

There was a silence. A painfully long silence where they kept staring at each other, not moving, not smiling, barely breathing. A long silence while she could hear his breath come out of his mouth as well as the ruckus coming from downstairs. It was only a minute but the tension in her fingers and the dryness of her throat made it feel like ten minutes were passing by.

She saw him move but she didn’t feel herself moving. She saw his legs slide down to steady themselves on the ground, she saw his chest standing up. She saw his arms moving, she saw him leaving his bed in her direction. She felt his fingers wrap up around the nape of her neck but she didn’t feel herself leaving her bed too. She felt the room moving around them but she didn’t feel the ground on her feet. She felt his lips crash onto hers but she barely felt her hand wrap her around his own head. She felt her legs wrap up around his hips but she barely felt them both falling back onto his bed.

She felt his tongue on her mouth and his hands going up her thighs and feeling their way up all the way to her back. She barely felt her mouth open and her tongue on his but she definitely heard herself loudly sigh on his mouth. She barely felt her hand playing with his hair but she definitely felt him as she pressed herself onto his pants. She felt his hands slip under her skirt, and she definitely heard herself moan against his mouth as they began torture her slowly going up and down her thighs.

She felt him smile against her mouth, and heard herself groan against him, just as she felt his head going back to get some air. She heard herself breathe heavily as her forehead barely stood back and her eyes stayed closed, as if hesitating to open up. She barely had the time to align a single thought before his mouth was back onto hers again.

She felt her legs tighten up around him when his hands stopped to lift her up and her back hit the mattress. She felt the weight of his body on her hips and she didn’t stop one second to think about their location while she kissed and played with his mouth. She stopped hearing herself sigh in contentment as one hand went back to caress her thigh while the other started to untie the knot that kept her dress tight. She barely stopped to think before her own hand left his bare back under his shirt to start undoing the buttons flowing below his chest.

She barely had the time to hold her head back as he groaned in discontentment to look at his chest now exposed before the door flew open.

She didn’t even hear what Cana was saying as she completely froze staring in her direction, seeing her lips move but not getting a sound while she couldn’t stop thinking about his hips pressing up between her legs and the feeling of his breath on her neck.

“Just get the fuck out of here.” She heard him yell as the brunette only laughed and left to close the door behind her.

She felt him stand slightly back, not completely leaving her but saying her name as he tried to get a response from her. She felt her cheeks flush and the realisation hitting her brain. She felt the heat taking taking all the space in her head and her chest leaving the mattress to sit up on the bed, completely flushed.

She heard him chuckle and ask her if she was okay, barely hiding the worry in his tone.

She nodded her head, not completely getting a sound out of her mouth as she stood up on her legs and he sat up on his bed, trying to get a clear reaction out of her.

“I’m… I’m fine.” She finally articulated as she desperately tied the knot back on her hip and adjusted the tissue back on her chest, her fingers then flying into her hair to put the strands back in place. Her cheeks were still red but she could see he was out of breath too and curiously not making a move, simply watching her put herself back together as he stayed on the bed with his elbows resting on his thighs. “I need to go back.”

She stared at him a little too long but he seemed more interested in looking at the parts of her body that were now covered than staring back into her eyes. Or maybe he too could feel the awkwardness building up in the air. She only looked back again once as her legs took the direction of the door, going around the bed to collect her shoes and walking way too fast across the room. She could feel her head slow down and she truly hated herself when the door slammed behind her as she walked the stairs back down again.

Next Chapter

How he had managed to accept so stupid a bet was even more incomprehensible.

He didn’t want to think about than, not when it was no longer required. Not that the demon wouldn’t have been able to remedy the situation for herself and her sister. But still, it made his stomach crawl to wonder about the matter.

She hadn’t managed to make an even stupider bet when her turn came, but it came close. She didn’t seem to be relieved when she joined them on their balcony. She looked awkward and her cheeks were flushed, but it probably had more to do with the tiny outfits she had been wearing in front of the whole crowd for the past half hour. Not that she was shy. There was a time he had seen her wearing much more daring in the middle of a less friendly audience.

He couldn’t understand why she had accepted that idiotic contest to begin with. Not even now, lying on his bed in their tiny little team room, watching her from the corner of his eye as she chatted along with the water mage. He didn’t understand what they were saying because the music he blasted in his ears was too loud, but from the sparkling eyes hanging on her every word, it could only be praise and admiration.

He didn’t comprehend it. She could have just ended the fight from the first minute without needing to go through the whole thing. And wasn’t that a little wicked of her to have waited the very last moment, once her opponent had gotten herself in her humiliating setting, before revealing they had never been playing on the same level ?

He didn’t understand how her brother could have made such a disgusting bet, but he could certainly imagine she never even thought she could lose hers.

Maybe she felt insulted to have been paired with someone that much weaker than her. He would have been, but he never would have stretch it on like she did, and he wasn’t known to be that respectful of other people’s feelings. Not that she would have likely lost the contest , but maybe that was his own vote on the matter rather than the judges’. Considering the events of the day before weren’t ingrained in their minds as they were in his.

She had been ignoring him since then, and he didn’t mind. Well, he did. He minded a lot. He really hated it when she pretended like nothing had ever happened between them and they were just two forced teammates happy to be working together for the greater good, but he never expected anything else. He knew she liked her own life private, even when things were less complicated. To be truthful, he didn’t feel comfortable making it public either. Especially when it felt so weird and hesitant.

He couldn’t help watching her though, couldn’t help noticing the beauty mark on her shoulder that he had forgotten was there and that only appeared when she took all her hair to one side. He did really like the way her skin moved around her shoulder blades, but in his current state he seemed to like the movement of every inch of skin he managed to catch.

He knew she knew very well that he was watching, didn’t show it. How could she, when there were two other team members talking and going though their stuff at the same time, preparing to join the ruckus and chants of victory that had already started downstairs ? He knew she couldn’t look at him with a knowing glare, or even blush at his insisting glances, but he very well hoped she felt it in her stomach and lower, and prayed she wouldn’t make it too hard to catch a few moments with her later.

Although with her being one of the stars of the day, and probably the only one standing, since her brother had many recovery days in front of him, he very hardly doubted he would manage a single second alone. Even if she wished it. Even if it was just to know where they stood at the moment. But she would not even look at him.

That’s why he got startled when she said something towards him, but he didn’t quite hear it and had to take a headphone off with the most uninterested face he could manage to make out.

“Are you going down with us ?” She repeated with that nice voice of hers. The one he couldn’t quite decide if he liked or not, definitely disliked when it was intended for him. But with the water mage still patiently waiting behind her, he couldn’t quite comment for the moment. He didn’t want to hurt her either. Nor could he say the dirty thought that came through his mind as she repeated those words.

“Is there going to be one of those every night ?” He asked in that uninterested tone of his.

He heard Gajeel sneer at his last remark as the dragon slayer went through the door to go down the stairs, but he ignored it because he didn’t really mean it to be funny.

“I’m afraid so.” She laughed as she got her shoes on and got up. “If they can find a way to party after a defeat, nobody could stop them after so many victories.”

She smiled then, as her eyes were still fixed on his, and it truly felt like a little bit of pride shined out of them. It did do something to his stomach. He sighed in defeat before jumping to his feet to follow the two women. He wished he could stay here in the silence, but when she made such an argument to invite him to her victory lap, there was no way to deny her the pleasure of his presence. At least he hoped it was a pleasure.

After they went downstairs, he suddenly lost track of her. He looked away at the sound of his team calling for him, but when he looked back, it seemed like she had disappeared in the same breath. After all, the tavern was filled with drunk members, happy cheers and some spectators that wanted to get a peek of some of the winners of the day. It was hard to keep track of anybody. Even her smell seemed to disappear in the crowd, and he knew it pretty well.

He gave up. She would probably turn up again, and he certainly wouldn’t find any time alone with her in the next hour. Instead, he found the Thunder Legion, which was a lot less complicated to spot, since they were making big signs with their arms to invite him at their table. Ever was missing though, he noticed as he took place in the corner. He wasn’t a big fan of people bumping in his chair every five minutes. But Cana was with them, still a bit hungover from the day before, but still drinking, along with the youngest Strauss, that seemed to have taken her own interest in his team this week.

“Have you heard then, Laxus ?” Bickslow jumped to ask him with a big smile, as the dragon slayer was barely getting his beer from the freshly poured ones on the table.

“Heard what ?” He looked at Freed, because he was usually a lot more concise with information. He appreciated that.

The rune mage pointed at the brunette before answering.

“Cana’s been chosen as your team’s reserve member for tomorrow.”

He looked at her, and she answered with a great smile and a gesture to clink their glasses. Which he did. Because why not ?

“What happened to stellar blue guy ?” He didn’t mean to be sarcastic but there was something that ticked him off about the former mage saint he couldn’t quite retain it.

Especially when his teammates never missed an occasion to laugh at his jokes. Only the white-haired girl rolled her eyes, and he could almost recognize the way her sister would have rolled them.

“He asked the master to get replaced. He said it was the best way to achieve what he came for.” The card mage answered with a beaming smirk. “Also, I think he’s still a bit hungover from last night.”

He sneered silently. It made sense. He didn’t know exactly what the man had come here to do, nor what he had agreed to with his grandfather, but it was surely difficult to accomplish stuck in their balcony all day. Since his cover was established now, he could take advantage of going freely about the arena and the whole town.

“Well you better not fool around if you’re called on to fight, I’m warning you.” He grumbled as he took a sip.

She laughed, as well as Bickslow and the take over mage, but Freed did frown at that last remark. Not that he would apologize for it, even if it wasn’t the nicest thing he could have said to welcome her into his ranks. But it was hard to be nice when you wanted to win.

“Well I won’t reach Mira’s level of efficiency, but I’ll do my best !” She went on smiling as she finished her glass.

He smirked then as the others laughed in excitement. He would have noted that Mirajane had spent a good twenty minutes fooling around before getting efficient, but it was best he kept that one to himself. If he didn’t want people misinterpreting and telling on him. He didn’t want to spoil the happy chatters that had started either.

“Did you know ?” Freed asked then as the others chatted away. “That she was planning to make it a fight in the end ?”

He didn’t. He was a bit hurt she didn’t tell him. If only to answer the puzzled look he had given her when the organizers came to ask her if she would agree to a modelling contest, only wondered about the rule book he had been reading in the past few days. If she even planned it from the beginning.

“Well, she did ask if there were any rules that got cancelled for her, but not much else.” He replied as the rune mage smiled. And he almost did himself after finishing his own glass.

If only he didn’t spot her at this very moment.

He saw her going up the stairs. Alone. Even if it hadn’t been an hour since they had joined the party. She wasn’t drunk. He could tell because the look she had in her eyes was far from the dopy one she had the day before. But she did look at him, a bit longer than just to spot him. Just one second longer before disappearing in the corridor. With the same smile plastered on her face as any other day.

So he knew he had to follow her. Or maybe that was his own desire talking. But whatever it was, he only waited two more minutes before getting up to go for the stairs. Despite the two men immediately noticing and trying to make him stay. So he only told them he was going for a smoke. And they seemed to settle after he assured them he would come back shortly.

They could be clingy sometimes.

He found her on the balcony on the third floor, sitting on the ground with her feet dangling in the air as he saw her bring the last drops of her glass to her lips. He didn’t say anything at first, only approached in expectation, attentive to the moment she was going to turn around to smile at him with the ever so same grin. He was more than prepared to tell her how much he hated when she treated him like any other random.

Sadly for his inebriated need for frustration, she didn’t turn around but stayed the same way, staring at the stary sky while he took place against the wall and got a cigarette out, just to give him something to do with his hands, or calm the tension that had came with their imagined fallout. The only thing that changed was the knowing smirk she had now. Maybe he was a bit too nervous when it came to her.

It was tensed, too tensed in comparison with yesterday’s events. The alcohol had helped a lot in that, but now that the effects had worn out and that any other presence was gone from around them, only the tension stayed. It wasn’t good tension, not the kind that announced extraordinary chemistry and better things to come, but the kind that froze your veins and made centimeters apart feel like meters. The kind that rendered any contact impossible. Like it was inappropriate.

There were some days he didn’t recognize her. Some days he wanted to shake that body off until the soul that had taken it hostage flew away to hell. But he knew it was the real thing and not some conspiracy theory. He had thought for a while that it was his grandfather that had filled her head with nonsense to absorb her into his disgusting idea of a guild. Long ago.

He knew a lot better now.

He knew she wasn’t that different from before. Even if she took one extreme to another, it was just a different kind of crazy. He liked the crazy in her, but the one she had before used to make sense to him. Even if others usually saw some weird gothic girl that could go psycho at any given moment, he usually understood everything she did. Even when she was being stupid. Even if everyone thought her nuts, it all made sense to him.

Now she just didn’t make sense to him.

People had gotten used to it. He hadn’t. People didn’t mind if she did a modelling contest for half an hour and then demoned out her enemy in the last seconds. They thought it was cool and nothing else. He thought it was cool but inexplicable.

“Why did you do it ?”

He thought he’d just ask. Because he was tired of the silence and her ignoring him. Because he was tired of staring at her like some stared at a master’s painting without any clue to understand the meaning. Her eyes did look mesmerizing. In the feeble orange light given out by the tired lamps, they only seemed bluer than before. And he never thought that possible. There was something hypnotizing about it.

“Do what ?”

They looked at him. And he tried no to get too tense when they stared and seemed like they were piercing his body to dig for his soul.

“The contest.” He tried to explain himself. “Why didn’t you just end it in the first minute instead of stringing it along for ages ?”

She looked a bit oblivious, like she didn’t quite understand the question, but only for a second before giggling. The sight of her dimples somehow made the weight of her eyes easier to bear as she only glared at him with that mysterious tone she liked to give herself sometimes.

“And where would be the fun in that ?” She almost whispered.

That mischievous air did something to his stomach. He thought about ending the conversation right here for much more interesting odds, but he wasn’t going to give up just like that. He needed to explain it, although it was hard to get his eyes away from her lips at that very moment.

“So you did it for fun ?”

He tried glancing away, but his stare was only met with black sky and weak stars that seemed pale in comparison to the other things he could look at. But he still needed to understand what fun had anything to do with the subject.

“I think a beauty contest is more fun than two people pounding themselves until one’s out, don’t you ?”

He laughed them, with a snarky tone that sounded meaner than he had meant. He really didn’t get her at all. He was a man, he could understand the fun in looking at women in magazines, but if he had them in an arena, he wouldn’t want them to pose. Maybe not everyone shared the same kinks as him.

“Not for one second, no.” He smirked.

She smiled too, like that answer didn’t really surprise her. It probably didn’t. He hadn’t changed that much compared to her. She knew him a lot more than he did her. Maybe that was his problem. Maybe he didn’t like feeling naked when she felt hidden by so many coats.

“Even if the fight wouldn’t last long ?” She whispered again, like she feared someone would hear her.

He smiled at that one. Because her fight wouldn’t have lasted long. Certainly not long enough to be fun for anybody. Maybe that was why she did it, maybe the element of surprise was the only way she had found to make it into something worthwhile. That he could maybe understand. Someday.

“At least it would have been over quicker.”

Because he didn’t like pretending, and he certainly wouldn’t have liked someone pretending to be on his level before revealing to be much stronger. He didn’t know about honour codes when it came to championship battles, but he knew about this rule.

“But it would have been a lot less fun.” She turned her eyes back to the sky, probably pretending not to be too bothered by the smoke that came in her direction with the wind.

He knew she hated that smell.

“So you had fun ?” He tried to insist, because it was probably the only way to explain what felt like an incredible and embarrassing waste of time to him.

“Not really, no. It was a bit embarrassing, to be honest.” She answered without hesitation, but not glancing at him to meet the taken aback face he suddenly gave her.

Now she didn’t even make sense anymore.

“Then why do it ?” He asked.

He sounded a bit angry when he said that. He knew because she looked right back at him with an amused grin. Because she knew she was screwing with his mind and it was funny to her. The way his eyebrows twitched in desperation for some explanation. She was aggravating sometimes.

“Maybe I didn’t want to fight.” She almost whispered again.

Well, that was a completely different question. Not that she should even be on this team if she wasn’t resolved to fight other people to win.

“But you ended up fighting anyway.” He replied too quickly, like he wanted to make her see that she wasn’t making any sense.

Maybe she did, and he just couldn’t quite grasp what she was trying to explain, but it felt so contradictory in his mind. He tried to calm himself down and took some time to blow some smoke away while she glanced at him for a while and shivered a little when some cold air blew by.

“It didn’t feel like I had any other choice in the end.”

She smiled at that one, weakly, glaring back at the dark to avoid looking at his face. She seemed a bit defeated and lost. And it bothered him so much he had nothing better to say.

“Not ready to go nude, huh ?” He snarked.

He said that to make her laugh, and it worked. He didn’t glance in case she looked at him in rage, and he didn’t feel like standing behind his own poor joke. If it was one. He heard her giggle and saw the smile in the corner of his eyes. It did feel good. Like the cold that once froze up his muscles warmed up for a bit.

“Shut up.” She ordered.

He smiled, because he liked when she swore. A few moments passed and the silence didn’t bother him some much anymore. He almost appreciated the cold air that blew on the back of his neck, if he wasn’t so focused on his next question.

“Why didn’t you just say no to that bet ?”

He said it as it came to him, but he knew the answer before she said a word. Because he wouldn’t have either.

“Says the man that once paid me a year’s mortgage.” He almost got startled by how close she suddenly got, so close he could feel the heat emanating from her.

She took his cigarette from his hand as she replied, because she was the only one that had the nerve to do that. Maybe because she was the only one he wouldn’t fry for it. He pretended he didn’t notice when her fingers slid on his. It was almost smoked out and he thought she was going to throw it from the balcony to punish him for blowing his smoke in her face, but she brought it to her lips and took a deep breath as he almost felt frozen in time.

He laughed then. Because she had some nerve, and because he had indeed paid her that for a bet. And it was stupid too. Not stupider than the thing she would have had to do if he had won, but pretty stupid too. Not that she would ever tell the others how she had managed to pay out her mortgage so fast. Even with spending that whole year on S-class jobs and rarely taking time off between them. Even if she managed to take some time to stalk him in-between.

Back when she worried about where he was, and what he was doing.

 Maybe he should have appreciated it more.

“But why go along with the contest to begin with if you weren’t sure you would win in the end ?”

That was the thing that bothered him most. Along with the mischievous grin she gave him as she finished the cigarette and took it out on the ground. They were a team, and they had a job to do, which was winning for the guild, which was weird enough coming from him. So why would she ever take the chance to lose when she could win so easily ?

“Because if there had been a chance I could get through it without fighting. I wanted to take it.”

He didn’t know what to say then. Maybe it was the biggest thing that he couldn’t quite understand about her yet. Why she hated fighting so much. Because out of the whole thing, it was the biggest thing that set her apart from the girl he thought he knew. And it bothered terribly. It bothered him even more because he didn’t know if he liked it or not. And because there was nothing he could say back to that.

“So you didn’t think there was any chance for you to win that last category, huh ?”

He said it with irony, but he knew she knew he was half serious about that question.

“Not everyone has your kinks.” She snarked with her ever so sweet voice that was more like a bully machine.

He laughed again. Maybe it was a bit true. He did have a thing for the claws.

“Besides, you don’t really think she would have suggested that bet if she weren’t sure that it would give her the victory ?”

She did have him there. He hadn’t thought about it like that. But wasn’t it a bit narcissistic to say that the only way she could have lost a beauty contest was if it meant having her in the magazine ? Maybe she hadn’t changed that much. She still had the ego. And more brain than him.

“So it was a last resort for you ?”

At least, it could make sense in that way.

“More like a twist.”

She said that one with that playful voice of hers. The one he couldn’t help but find cute. So he didn’t look at her because he didn’t want to meet those eyes that definitely felt playful too. He still had some things that needed clearing up before he could get distracted by her.

“So avoiding one minute of fighting was better than going through the whole thing when it wasn’t even fun for you ?”

She almost looked disappointed in the corner of his eye. Probably because he insisted on staring away when the sky couldn’t be so interesting to him. Because he insisted with the serious talk, and he could tell that she was growing annoyed with it. Not that he cared.

“The public had fun.”

She was serious back again. Giving up on getting anything playful out of him. Maybe that was the best way to get something truly honest out of her. Because he hadn’t thought of that either.

“And that was worth it ?”

He couldn’t relate to it though. Not even when he glanced at her to find some hidden answer in her face that looked a lot more focused all of a sudden. He could never do something like it for the amusement of other people, but it felt a bit insulting to say.

“It’s a spectacle.” She replied before looking away, like she couldn’t quite sustain his gaze. “If the public’s fun wasn’t worth it, we could just have it out in the Council’s gardens and publish the results in the Sorcerer’s magazine.”

She meant it to be funny, but it didn’t sound so absurd to him.

“Maybe it would be better.” He only replied.

She only frowned at that one, disappointed at the lack of reaction from her joke.

“Not if the point is to get jobs back on our board.”

She had a point there. Fighting in public was definitely better for publicity, even if they won the title.

“Well I’m not taking my clothes off for that.”

She giggled at that one. And he did a bit too. But ever so slightly, and it didn’t feel so cold anymore. Even if he could start hearing some familiar voices coming up the stairs, which were clearly going to make the air a lot more tensed than it was now.

“You should.” She giggled. And he didn’t know if he was supposed to feel flattered. “But it’s a good thing for the guild that I’m willing.”

He smiled too, but the voices were getting closer, and he suddenly wondered if he hadn’t wasted a whole evening talking about that fight rather than talking about what truly interested him.

“I promise you when I fight, I’ll make sure it’s impressive enough of a spectacle.”

She laughed again, but it was interrupted by the sound of her sister and Cana opening the door and calling for her to get back down with them. They did look a bit surprised when they saw them both on the balcony, but they didn’t say much more than repeating the same question to him. They didn’t to care that much when he nodded his head in refusal as they watched the takeover mage get up with the glass she had brought over.

“I have no doubt about that.” She whispered.

She looked at him then, before walking away to join her sister and friend, with that calm gentle smile of hers, and the eyes that pierced right through his skull. And it did something to his stomach, in the good way. The way that told him that maybe he could get used to that smile. Maybe he liked it. Even when it was meant for him. Especially if it was meant for him.

He only wished he hadn’t wasted his entire allowed time with those stupid questions.

Last Chapter

“I thought it was really fun.” Mirajane cheered with a sweet voice while she went for hers. “Everyone looks so talented, the games are everything but easy.” She still trembled a little bit when she caught the thunder mage’s disapproving glare as he fell onto his own bed. “Everyone did his best.”

She couldn’t help but to send a worried gaze to the water mage that hadn’t said a word since the day had ended, seeming quite empty-looking as she absentmindedly brushed her hair. Surely their defeat was much harder to swallow for her than for any of them. If only Gajeel could gather his two remaining neurons to gain some awareness and stop talking about their upcoming strategy to regain the points they had missed today.

She wished she had a pan to slam onto his head.

“How many times do I have to say I’m sorry ?” Jellal elevated his voice a bit to the incessant rants of their teammate.

Mirajane only sighed.

“How about as many times as it takes for you to go kick your guildmates’ sorry asses for what they did to us ?”

That was a good thought. If only he hadn’t yelled it.

“It’s not their fault.” Jellal sighed in turn, resting his eyes as his head was beginning to hurt. “They were only trying to keep me from revealing my true identity by beating Jura.”

She heard the blonde grunt then, even if that one went ignored as the two men continued their insufferably cute bickering. She looked at him, but he only glanced in her direction, still ignoring her as he did since the day before. It was her turn to grunt.

“What the hell do we need you for, if you can’t even use your real magic to win ?” The volume went up as the former mage saint only whined in desperation.

Even Juvia seemed to look up, also quite triggered by the dragon slayer’s unwillingness to let the subject go.

“It’s not my fault if they put me up against the only mage I couldn’t beat without it !”

The poor Jellal seemed also desperate to prove his innocence.

Mirajane sighed again, more loudly this time, so maybe the mood would lighten up and stop being so aggressive. But they still went on nonetheless.

“Maybe we should have sent thunder jerk over here, if only it wasn’t for that stupid rule.”

He grunted at that one again, more like snarked. So loud that it almost startled her, but again, their beds were only a few feet apart. She weirdly couldn’t tell if it was supposed to be an agreeing kind of grunt, with the fact that he would have been more competent to beat the mage saint, or a downright protest to being called a jerk. But with his eyes still glued to what seemed to be the rule book of the games this time, nobody could really tell.

If only they could finally stop yelling. With the selection trials during the night and the day-long games, she hadn’t slept quite enough, and the incessant ranting was making her headache even stronger.

“The last day will probably include another fight against him.”

She seemed to be the last one taken aback by the blonde’s sudden affirmation, as every one of them suddenly fell silent. Thank God, a bit of silence.

“They wouldn’t have wasted their strongest contestant on the first day.” He didn’t seem to notice because his eyes stayed faithful to the words he was currently reading. “So, they’ve probably planned a big finale with him for the end of the games.”

The absence of reply finally had him look up at them all staring back quiet. He frowned but the silence was soon broken again by Gajeel.

“Ladies and gentlemen, he can speak.”

She wished she could have refrained the loud chuckle that immediately came out of her mouth. To his great dismay as she seemed to be followed by Juvia, who finally cracked a smile of laughter, Gajeel, who seemed to enjoy laughing at his own jokes, and the stellar mage as well, so much that it quickly ended in all four of them just trying to keep the giggles in as the thunder mage only stared in desperation, wondering how long they could go on before he could fry them all for their impertinence.

Against all odds, she was the first to regain composure.

“Well, that actually kind of makes sense.” That seemed to calm the others and finally reduce Gajeel to silence as he sighed and fell back onto his bed, still getting cold sweat from the shut-up stare Laxus had been shooting him for a good 2 minutes.

And then the door opened.

“What are you all doing, looking like you’ve just been to a funeral ?” Cana suddenly yelled as they all turned to face her. “There’s a party down there !”

There was a slight pause where everyone seemed to gather their thoughts.

“Sorry, we didn’t have the greatest of day.” Gajeel only snarked against her accusing stare and the bottle she was holding in her right hand.

“Well it’s no use wallowing about it.” She only replied.” Come on, everyone’s downstairs !” She dragged Juvia to the door as the others only sighed in resignation and gathered their things to join. “I bet Natsu a hundred bucks he can’t surf on barrel and that’s just going to be hilarious !”

“Do you have enough alcohol to make every memory of the day magically disappear !” Jellal only asked as he followed, making sure to grab his hat and mask with him.

Unsurprisingly, that last question seemed to brighten the card mage’s day as her face illuminated with the shiniest smile.

“I certainly do, come on, I’ll make you forget everything.” She only patted on his shoulder while glancing back at the demon mage. “You’re coming ?” The demon mage only smiled, debating whether it was a good idea to get very drunk with the games continuing the day after, and let’s not forget the thunder mage’s presence right beside as he bumped into her shoulders before looking back at her to raise his eyebrows.

Are you coming ?

Maybe she just had to fill the blanks herself to hear him speak for now.

.

Although, the hand on her thigh was soon going to speak louder than words. Or maybe he was drunk. That was highly possible as they had been drinking for a few hours now. Drinking, and chatting, and laughing, mostly on her part. Not with each other though, but her siblings had been quite adamant about sitting at the Thunder Legion’s table, so they had found themselves shoved up next to each other quite quickly. Which was fine. Not nerve-wracking at all.

“Don’t you think it’s kind of masturbatory to have an entire guild of men ?” Evergreen continued to rant.

She didn’t know how much he had to drink. At least as much as her, so, a lot. She hadn’t counted, but the fact that she couldn’t tell the exact number was already a sign that she shouldn’t get up for some while, unless she wanted to fall straight on her face. She was already acting stupid, giggling like an idiot at everyone’s joke, even the really unfunny ones. He didn’t speak much, but it was still a lot more than before, trying to reply from his corner with at least a facial expression to every remark one of his friends made with the most expectant stare.

“Hey ! why is it weird to have a guild of men but not also for the whole guild of women ?” Evergreen only shrugged to the seith’s remark.

It was cute, the way they gazed, waiting for a reaction, like puppies waiting for their treat.

“Well, at least the women don’t spend their time screaming about being manly.” The fairy mage went on.

And kind of odd.  

“What’s wrong about being manly ?” Her brother whined.

But cute.

“Nothing, Elf-nii-chan, she’s just trying to spite you.” Her sister patted him on the shoulder, sending annoyed frowns to the woman, who only shrugged some more.

She did love puppies.

“I think it rather makes sense.” The rune mage tried to refocus the conversation. “To keep one focused on the task at hand.” Bickslow only rolled his eyes out.

If it wasn’t for the hand, one could have thought that he was totally ignoring her presence. Well, he did look at her when she talked, but he never replied, not that she ever talked to him directly. But then, there had been his foot, or maybe it had been hers first, but he didn’t pull away nonetheless. Not when she touched it, and not even when she cluelessly left it there. But his absence of reaction was total, for a while at least. She knew his poker face was good, but even his eyebrow, which she knew to be his tell, didn’t make the slightest movement. One could only imagine the disappointment she felt.  

“Don’t you think men need more help getting focused, Ever ?” Bickslow snarked, but he looked at Laxus when he spoke, with his annoying grin.

So cute.

“Well, if you say it like that.” Evergreen tried to shut him down by ordering another round.

But then, his foot had moved, not away, but against her. And the rush of adrenaline was just embarrassing. She could feel the red rushing to her cheeks, but at least she could pretend it was the tequila they had just ordered, pretend she had forgotten how much that liquid burnt one’s throat, pretend a whole lot of indecent thoughts hadn’t just rushed up to her brain.

“Well, I don’t know if I prefer the sound of that.” Her sister tried to intervene.

Was every hotel room really booked ? Or was that just a saying during the Games ?

“Of course you don’t, you have sense.” Bickslow approved, but only to spite the fairy mage. “Why do you think Laxus ? Did you ever have a hard time focusing ?”

The thunder mage only shrugged, looking back at his glass.

“Not really.” He mumbled.

She retained herself from snarking back, very badly that is to say.

But then he looked.

Right at her. Right at the moment she had gazed upon him.

And nobody seemed to notice because they had gone back to their little conversation, while his eyes stayed on hers for what felt to be so long, she had to send worried gazes around just to make sure nobody had caught that. Because they would know, instantly, everything. If not by the hot look his dark eyes had just sent straight to her stomach, making it crawl back on itself, by the way the heat had replaced her face. And she knew she was red as a poppy because she could swear he had that knowing smirk on the corner of his mouth.

“What about you, Mirajane, did you ever have trouble focusing ?” Freed asked, but it took her a whole second to understand he was addressing her.

Her unawareness made them laugh. So she giggled too, and reddened a bit. Nobody seemed to notice she had been looking at him though.

“Are you okay, Mira-nee ?” Her sister tried to help. “You look tired.”

And now, he was fully smirking, and sending those annoying glances at her. And she wanted to slam his face into that glass of his.

“Maybe we should go to bed, it is going to be a long day tomorrow.” Her brother tried too.

If only they didn’t keep her stomach in the most unnatural position.

“It’s not that late, though.” Evergreen shut his idea down, the remark did annoy him, but he rapidly refocused on his older sister.

Maybe she should go to sleep, before she drank more and stopped being able to hide the embarrassing turmoil going on inside her.

“Especially when one of you might fight tomorrow.” Freed tried to help, and even Bickslow shrugged in understanding.

But then, there was his hand, sliding up and down her thigh, so lightly it almost tickled her. And she almost jumped up, if all the stares hadn’t been on her at that exact moment.

“I’m fine.” She giggled, shutting the whole thing so quickly they changed the entire topic.

God, he was probably laughing his ass off inside right now. Especially after the infuriated glare she had just sent him. If only he didn’t look so damn sexy.

“Why does it always have to be about dirty things with you ?” Evergreen only snapped at Bickslow, while she saw her siblings redden and the seith mage explode in laughter.

She had missed something. The dragon slayer proved to be useless as he looked just as clueless as she was when she glanced at him for help.

Obviously, she wasn’t the only one having problems focusing.

Because she knew he was struggling to understand Bickslow when he repeated the joke again to gain his approval. Or maybe that was the way her foot had slowly slid up his tibia. She saw him gulp, and glance, ever so quickly in her direction, just as much annoyed. And his hand had suddenly gripped her thigh so strongly, she actually jumped a bit. Not that it could stop her from playing with the edge of his jeans with her toes.

“Don’t be gross.” Freed shut Bickslow down, before Laxus even had a chance to collect his thoughts.

Revenge was indeed sweet.

.

She knew she shouldn’t have had so much to drink. Now her legs were wobbly, and she couldn’t quite see straight. How the hell did she even drink that much ? She didn’t even remember ordering two glasses, but between the Cana’s orders in the beginning, the Thunder Legion’s orders in the middle, or the weird glasses that kept getting in front of her in the end, it was no wonder why she lost count. But now, she had to go to sleep and when she woke up, she would have to go through the whole day and possibly fight with the worst hangover ever.

Not that she never fought with a hangover, but still.

She was going to go to bed, after successfully dropping Cana on her bed with Erza’s help. The brunette was a mess after her drinking contest against Bacchus. She tried to ignore the disapproving stares the woman sent her, only rolling her eyes out with her wobbly hands and confused eyes as they tucked her into bed. Of course she would disapprove the whole drinking thing. After all, they were on a job to get the guild back on top, there was place for failure, and certainly no place for excesses.

If only her own hand didn’t shake as she tried to take the card mage’s shoes off.

And wasn’t it so funny that she thought she needed her to win this whole thing ? Like she truly thought that she couldn’t do it by herself with her own team. Maybe, she needed to worry about her own sorry ass, and be happy the demonic mage didn’t take it too seriously, or she would have one hell of a hard day when her team lost.

If only she could decide about the things she could ask her to do when that bet would be won.

Oh revenge was indeed going to be sweet.

“I can’t believe you didn’t tell me you were going to be on a second team.”

She almost jumped, but only because she hadn’t quite thought about this whole thing since the morning. So much had happened since then, she didn’t even imagine the knight mage could be still stuck on that. So she just let out a loud giggle, which was painful to stop when she met the woman’s cold stare.

“Well, I didn’t want to spoil the surprise.” She giggled some more, without so much as a reaction. “Are you seriously angry with me ?”

Her smile died then as they walked back down the corridor.

But she didn’t get an answer.

“Goodnight.”

Not did she get even a slight smile as the redhead almost slammed her team’s bedroom door behind.

She was so aggravating sometimes. Shedidn’t think much more about it as she opened her own door to hopefully tuck herself into her own bed, even it was going to spin quite a lot.

But she froze when she saw him.

He was still laying on that bed. Well, his bed. Not that she expected him to be on her bed or anything, but he never seemed to change position or anything either.

“Hey.” He only said softly, not looking up from this rulebook he had seem to get lost in again.

“Hey.”

There was an awkward silence, then. When he only glanced at her while she desperately tried to correctly sit on her bed, take her shoes off without losing all balance, and stop the heat that threatened to take control of her face again. Maybe she could just blame it on the alcohol. She then tried to find her stuff, but her bag was kind of stuck under her bed, so it took an embarrassing long time to get it out and start searching for her night clothes and bathroom supplies.

He didn’t seem to notice but she knew he was a great pretender. She cursed the master inside yet again for forcing her to be on this team and being so cheap it probably wasn’t the only time she would find herself so awkwardly alone with him. Where were the others even ? She knew it wasn’t that late. To her great shame, because now she had to admit she was already that drunk.

To him.

And she really didn’t want to.

“You’re okay ?”

His voice startled her again, even more when she found him staring at her dumbfounded gaze and probably very red cheeks.

“Yeah.” She tried to giggle, but it sounded just wrong.

“Oh.” He didn’t look away though, still piercing through like he really tried to figure out what she was up to. “Because you’ve been staring at your bag for like five minutes…so, I just wondered.”

Fuck. Five minutes ? She needed to go to bed. No, she needed to change first. But she had sweated all day, so a shower would be better first. Not that she had a choice, because it was either the bathroom or change in the room in front of him. And she knew he wouldn’t mind after the spending the last hour with his hand up her leg, but that wasn’t happening. Not when she couldn’t take her shoes off without risking falling on her nose.

She had a reputation to keep.

“Why don’t you concentrate on finding your loophole, or whatever you’ve been searching for since this morning ?”

If only he didn’t look so hot as he suddenly shut the book down to settle it on the table. He didn’t look away though, still gazed at her as he stood up to open the window and nonchalantly took out the pack of cigarettes from his pocket. She knew now why he took the window bed. She didn’t look away either, still tried to make herself as defiant as possible as she watched him smirk and light the silly thing on, inhaling it like he was some hot gangster boy from the movies.

He did look the part though.

He didn’t say anything at first, but he was the first to break their staring contest while he exhaled the smoke out and she took the opportunity to finally get her stuff out of her bag.

“So” He started, staring again like she was doing the most interesting thing in the world. “Are you planning to change in the bathroom or right here ?”

To say she got flustered was an understatement. She got so red, she knew it was impossible to hide anymore. But she couldn’t let him win after he had spent the whole day trying to get on her last nerve. She did smile though, a bit awkwardly but quite angrily too. She paused, looking first at her bag, and taking a long inspiration before rising up her eyes to meet his face. She formed the words again and again in her head, just to be sure she wouldn’t stutter.

“Shut up.”

She was happy, because her voice hadn’t trembled, nor broken, certainly not stuttered, and even though her cheeks were very hot, she knew her gaze to be just as cold. But he did smirk though, although he did look a bit taken aback, like he expected any kind of different answer. But he was getting on her last nerve, and she had plenty.

“Why ?” He insisted, still trying not to grin too widely or his canines would start showing. “I’m only asking a question.”

“Oh yeah sure, like you fucking mean it.”

She was very aggressive now, and she could feel the anger replace the awkwardness in her throat. She just had to remember to keep her voice down because God forbid she alerted the whole guild with that stupid fight of theirs. He did get startled too at that one, with his eyebrows suddenly rising, and she was pretty sure he almost choke himself on that cigarette of his.

“What makes you think I don’t mean it ?”

This one hurt her. Because she knew he wasn’t serious with this whole thing. Not the way she was. It didn’t seem to bother him not to talk to her all day, nor did he truly tried to talk to her ever since he came back. She had tried. She had stressed over, and over it, and she was done. She was truly done trying to figure out what on earth could be going on in that pretty little hot head of his.

Even though those jeans and t-shirt looked very fit on him. And even though seeing those teeth when he flirted like an asshole was definitely something. But there was difference between flirting, and being an asshole.

“Oh, is that so ?” She got up because of the anger, but she only spoke up because of the alcohol. She was this close to yelling. “So, if I were to take my dress off right here, in front of you, you’d actually do something about it, instead of staring at me like a wolf ?” She said that to provoke him, because she knew he wasn’t going to walk out of that one. And she needed to be angry with him.

“Would you want me to do something about it ?”

It was her turn to smirk. Not only because she had the images going up in her mind, and honestly it wasn’t so bad of an idea. To just get over it and talk later, at least things would be dealt with much more quietly, because there was no way she was finishing that conversation calmy. She knew she was approaching him also, but not matter how much her mind tried to tell her to go back, she only advanced until she was just one step away from him.

She could feel the cold air skimming along her neck, and she realised just how much she had to be red, because it felt frozen coming in contact with her cheeks. But she didn’t think she looked ridiculous, because he definitely staring at her like she was extremely not. And that felt good, but only at first because then, she remembered it wasn’t real, and that it was all just a game to him. And that really hurt. it really hurt to be this close to him, to catch a glimpse of his aftershave and the whiskey he’d been drinking, while knowing he would never let her get so close.

“I want you to stop playing with me.”

She said that one not too loud. Not because she was less angry but because she was close enough to touch him now. He didn’t take a step back though, he allowed her to approach until she was so near, she could start feeling the heat coming from him. He did look away, and crushed his cigarette that was only half finished. But when he looked back at her, she saw something in his eyes. Something serious, like he actually cared. And she almost couldn’t breathe.

“I’m not playing at anything, demon.”

But that wasn’t enough for her. Because she was tired. Tired of being angry but also tired of wanting to come near him but never getting to actually do it. She was tired of this useless flirting and pretending, and getting all worked up for something that never happened.

“Aren’t you ?”

So she tried. She was already so close, she almost didn’t have to move to touch his lips. She went forward and tried to kiss him, but as she closed her eyes, she felt it change. The whole seriousness he had just then kind of vanished, and instead, he was left all hesitant before turning his head away, exhaling and clenching his teeth like that took every effort in his body.

“Mira…”

And it hurt. It hurt so bad, it felt like her organs had bones and they all had broken at the same time. Her intestines, her stomach, her lungs. Even her throat because there wasn’t much left of her voice when she gathered the strength to talk.

“What the hell are you doing ?”

She knew she sounded like she was going to cry, but she didn’t care. She didn’t care because she wanted him to see how much he was hurting her, and how much she had the right to hate him.

“You’re hella drunk.”

And it felt so stupid. This whole thing. And she had to be the stupidest girl in the world because it wasn’t even the first time he used that excuse to get out of this. Stupid girl. Why did she think it would be any different this time ?

“No, I’m not.”

Her voice still trembled but she didn’t walk back, she waited until he gently grabbed her arms and tried to push her away. And she wanted to resist, but there was something so utterly desperate about it that she just let him.

“Yes, you are, your breath smells like you swallowed the entire bar.”

He tried to walk with her, tried to guide her to her bed, but she couldn’t take her eyes off of him. She couldn’t stop trying to figure out why he was smirking right now. Why he didn’t get that she wanted to hit him badly. And push him. And scream. So she gripped on his arms and bit her lip so the tears wouldn’t come out too fast.

“Why are you doing this to me ?”

She knew her voice was pathetic. She knew she looked pathetic.

“Mira, you’re drunk, you should go to bed. We can talk about that tomorrow.”

Tomorrow ? No, no way, she wasn’t spending yet another night wondering about what she did wrong or what was going in his head. No, no fucking way. Not tomorrow, and certainly not the fucking day after. So she just yelled and pushed him.

Hard. So hard he almost lost balance and fell over his own bed. But he didn’t, and she felt like running. Running to a place where she wouldn’t have to see his face and all the humiliation that went with it. She went to put her shoes on, because whatever he said, she wasn’t that drunk. Not enough to forget her shoes, and certainly not enough not to know exactly what she was doing.

It was all his fault.

“Where the fuck are you going ? Mirajane, come back here.”

She heard him yell and throw orders around. She felt him trying to reach her in the precipitation, so she grabbed the first thing that came and threw it as hard as she could at his ridiculous face. It happened to be one of her spare shoes. But he dodged it.

“Stop throwing shoes at me !”

He tried to reach for her again but she only felt the tip of his fingers before shoving him again.

 “Don’t touch me.”

When he tried again, he looked a lot more serious than just before. But she had taken some advance, so she was already at the door.

“Mirajane”

He swallowed the distance so quickly it actually startled her. But she was quick too, and the door was opened now, so she only had the time to slam it just before his face.

And then she ran. She ran downstairs, without caring anymore if anyone heard them. They were probably all drunk anyway. She heard the door open, and the fast and heavy steps that followed just after her. She didn’t hear him anymore, but he was calling. But a lot quieter, because he still cared about waking up everyone.

When she reached the ground floor of the tavern, she only had time to see them. All three of them only. If those feet sleeping on one of the benches were indeed Jellal’s. The rest of the entire place was empty. Which was weird because it couldn’t be that late, or maybe they had taken the party somewhere else. She felt relief, because he was coming after her, and she really didn’t feel like inventing some lie to explain it. At least these ones wouldn’t care that much.

If only he didn’t try to grab her just then.

“Mirajane !”

There’s something about reflexes. Something incontrollable. And relieving. She didn’t feel her hand take the bottle from the bar beside her, she didn’t even feel it come in contact with the palm of her hand. And it must have been cold. But she didn’t feel anything except the rage that was pumping through her veins. She just slammed it. Into his face. But unlike the door, it did touch him this time. And break. Into little pieces. It made a noise too. A big one. But not as big as his face.

He was wet now. And she was frozen, with the rest of the bottle falling on the ground. Not because she was afraid of the infuriated look he gave her at this instant, but because she was just realizing exactly what she had done. And by the screams she had heard from their teammates, she knew it was real. She had crushed a bottle in his face. And now his head was wet with alcohol dripping from his chin, and kind of grimacing in pain or in anger.

She could have been afraid. But there was something about his face, and his eyebrows twitching uncontrollably. Something so funny and utterly ridiculous. Something about the rage coming down in one blow. She just broke out into laughter.

Horribly.

Uncontrollably.

And she heard the others laughing with her, and their hesitation to come up. And it was all so stupid, she felt like nothing but painfully apologizing between two hiccups, even if her stomach wasn’t so keen on helping her. She tried to articulate the words, but it was just so hard.

“I’m sor…”

He didn’t feel like laughing though. He looked torn between throwing another bottle at her head or frying her on the spot. His vein was pumping on his forehead, and it made all the blood leave her head to go straight to her feet.

Fuck, he was pissed.

And she wasn’t normally afraid of him, but the firing look in his eyes somehow made her forget she was capable of handling a drunken fight with him.

“Run.”

So she just ran again.

And if someone ever had to comment this scene, they would say that never did they see someone so pathetically run for their life.

.

She didn’t know how long she had been running for. Five, ten minutes. She didn’t even understand how he hadn’t already caught her. The guy could transform into lightning for god’s sake. Or maybe he didn’t know which way she went. Or maybe he was lost. Which was likely because he had the worse orientation skills ever. But wasn’t he supposed to have a dragon’s nose or something ? Couldn’t he find her with that ?

It was still weird to her, to think of him as one of them. She tried not to think about it too much but every time she remembered, it somewhat pinched her chest. She had known him for too long not to be hurt to hear something so important so long after. Or maybe she was just hurt he never told her himself. Especially when she used to tell him everything about herself. More or less.

She was getting tired now. Even with the three months of training, her stamina wasn’t the same as it used to. The alcohol wasn’t helping either, and she was very much trying to ignore the sick feeling that was growing up in her chest as well. It was cold too, she realised when she stopped. The street was full of drunk people having fun in all those bars. Probably all tourists that came for the festival.

It was loud too, and it smelled like smoke and beer. And so cold. She shivered and suddenly wondered when the last time was she had seen her sweater. The last time she saw it, it was on the bench they were all sat at, she remembered because it had been in the way of his hand to access her thigh, when everything was still hesitant, and not gone totally wrong. She shivered a second time, not because of the cold, but because she thought back on the feeling of his hand against her skin.

Maybe she should start fleeing again.

She felt it, the heaviness. It always came when he approached, it was like an invisible dark cloud following his every step. Most people missed it because they did not know him, but she would have recognised it had she been lost in the sea of a thousand people. And it sent chills down her spine. And not only because she had to start running again.

She couldn’t even run anymore. There were so many people she couldn’t make two steps before crashing into someone. Some of them even that weird frowning face like they recognised her from somewhere but couldn’t quite tell where. At that pace, he was going to catch her in no time. She should transform into someone else, maybe with the crowd, he wouldn’t be able to spot her smell. She didn’t even know how good he was with smells.

She entered a perpendicular street, because it was always a lot quieter to transform with less people looking, besides, she had to transform into someone going the other way or it would look weird. But then she saw it. She saw the neon, the music coming from the place, the man guarding the entrance but the weird windows with their shuts down. It could only mean one thing. Strip club. So she rushed into it. The man didn’t even stop her. Why would he ?

Inside, the music was a lot louder. And it couldn’t be that late because the girls dancing still had way too many clothes on. She didn’t even bother thinking about where she was going, instead, she went for the back room just near the scenes. Hopefully, she could hide in there. Hopefully, he wouldn’t be able to catch her smell in that street. Hopefully, he wouldn’t imagine that she would go into a strip club. Hopefully, he didn’t know where the backroom was.

It was surprisingly empty. But that worked to her advantage, maybe she could transform and dress up as a waitress or something. Annoying thing was she had to choose the uniform carefully if she didn’t want to be forced to take it off without blowing her whole cover. Maybe she could make herself into a brunette, or a redhead. Maybe he didn’t like those and wouldn’t even look at her. Or maybe he would look and recognise her, and she would get anxious her whole life every time he looked at a brunette.

God that was stupid. She told herself as she saw her face change in the mirror circled by lights. She looked cute, in some way. Even had given herself freckles and green eyes. The face was always the hardest to change without a model. But she had actually managed to do a great job. Now she had to find some clothes. Hopefully.

“There you are.”

She froze. She hadn’t felt him behind her. And she always felt him. She jumped also and weirdly tried to punch first, because in desperate cases, attack was surely the greatest defence. She must have been sloppy because he stopped her punch with one hand and way too easily. He was grinning too, almost laughing. If only he didn’t slam her against the wall just as fast.

“Really ?” He smiled again, but this time she could actually smell the tobacco on his breath. “That’s all you can do ?”

She gasped, even lost her transformation as her head recovered from the shock. He was blocking her wrists with two hands and there was no way she could get out of his grip without magic, but that would probably alert the whole party going on in the next room. Even if he probably had wet dreams about getting his ass kicked by one of her demons. She laughed then. Honestly. She was lost in giggles because she didn’t mind the position that much. Even if it meant getting her ass fried in less than two minutes. She would have had a good run.

“Stop it !” She yelled, still giggling hysterically as she started feeling some all too familiar tickling in the palms of his hand.

“Did you really think you were going to get away with that, little demon ?” He teased, still sending small charges through her arms, just to see her squirm and gesticulate on the spot.

“Let me go !” She wanted to add please, but thankfully she stopped herself.

And just when his arms left her hand and she thought her misery over, his hand grabbed her face and his lips crashed into hers. Not that she cared, she would have been angry if it didn’t come to that after his little game of torture. She knew he was smiling as she gripped his hair and tried to shove him closer. His tongue felt nice, and so did his hand going down her waist to grab her just below. So she almost bit him. Because it surprised her, but also because she couldn’t possibly let him win.

She almost felt lightheaded. Especially when he started tracing his way down her neck, while still grabbing everywhere he could. And that felt good. She always relished on his touch. It was rough, but sweet, but really so hot. She gripped his jeans also, and tried to bring him even closer, because it felt like nothing was ever going to close enough. She did grab her face again, and she moaned of frustration. But it didn’t last as he kissed her so deeply, she had to grab his shirt and wonder if she still had the strength to tear all those buttons off.  

He tried to faintly protest, but then, they both heard the door open, and it was like a very cold shower coming down on them both.

“Oh, sorry to bother you guys, but both of you got to get out.”

She was pretty. The girl that interrupted them. A brunette, but she didn’t really care right now. Not when his hand was still on her waist, near but not quite where she truly wanted them. He smelled good too, behind the whole reek of alcohol and tobacco, he smelled just like she remembered. And it was just the best. She did giggle though, at the awkwardness of getting caught. He seemed more bothered in his tasks than anything else.

 “Unless you’re down with a third.”

He did look at her them, almost hesitant, and she almost jumped out of her skin. What the hell was he thinking ? There was no way she was doing that with him, well with him maybe, but not with someone else. He even had the nerve to look disappointed. It finished convincing her to shove him away as they parted and took their way to the exit. She almost heard him apologizing to the girl, and she swore she could have punched him so hard.

She looked a bit awkward though, trying to put her dress back on correctly as they made their way through the crowd. The air seemed twice as cold as it had been before when she stepped out. Not surprising though as it had been horribly hot in that club. She did shiver a whole lot more when she felt his hand grab her waist and pull her towards the main street at the corner.

He didn’t say anything at first, but he looked a lot calmer than he had been before. So, she just followed him, like a convicted criminal bowing to their sentence. He even stayed quiet until they left the crowded street and walked peacefully towards the tavern.

“So, should we find somewhere else to go, or do you want to go back ?”

She did feel her heart jump at that one. But hopefully she didn’t show anything, and looked at him with that annoying grin on her face. Shaking her head though.

“Every other hotel room is booked, remember ?”

He grinned.

“Not the kind that rents by the hour.”

She laughed. He was truly that desperate. But she was drunk, and so was he. And it was all too important, she couldn’t have looked herself in the mirror if it ended in some creepy hotel with weird stains scattered across the room.

“Let’s just go, before the others come looking for us.”

They did go back, without saying anything, although she could feel some kind of small disappointment in his eyes, but he was still kind of grinning, so all was well.

“Where the hell were you guys ?” Gajeel asked as they walked in the room and found them all already getting into bed.

Jellal was still sleeping like a baby, which was weird because she didn’t even know if he was supposed to sleep here or with his own guild. Not that it mattered that much, but he certainly was going to have one hell of a headache tomorrow. If not the whole hangover that traditionally went with it. At least, he probably wasn’t going to be asked to fight anymore.

“Nowhere.” Laxus answered without many details.

She watched him crash on his own bed, as she went to find her night stuff again. She knew Gajeel wasn’t convinced by the answer, and that Juvia wanted to ask a whole another number of questions. But maybe they were intimidated, or maybe they honestly didn’t want to know that much, anyway, they didn’t ask any more questions as she finally went into that bathroom to get ready for the night.

She hoped she would catch a glimpse of his eyes as she walked out and tucked herself into her own covers, but he was already looking towards the window and away from her. It disappointed her, but it didn’t distress her that much. After all, he surely wasn’t going to ignore her after everything that happened today ? Not in private at least. If they succeeded in getting any private time without having to throw tableware around. It would be nice change. A nice, welcome change. All was well.

Next Chapter

Talking to him had been difficult. Between the three months of intense training and their unexpected depart for the Grand Magic Games as the secret but still official second team, it had proved itself impossible to get him alone in a room. And she tried. Many times. Or so she made excuses for herself.

His teammates had been haunting around him the whole time, so she couldn’t possibly make a move. Even if once he had been alone, but then she completely blanked about what excuse to use to drag him into the storage room, so she chose to retreat and abort the mission. Another time, she actually had him alone, inside the master’s very small office, and she could see in his eyes that he was waiting for something. Some acknowledgment. Some meaningful talk.

But then, Erza had walked in.

And even she seemed sorry she did. Because she knew, and she desperately wanted to help. And Mira thanked her for that. For being her friend. Even if at the moment she felt more like slamming her head into the desk.

So they hadn’t talked.

Now they were going to work as a team. For a very public and probably goofy fighting event. She had to concentrate to keep her fingers from trembling. She hated fighting at public events. She hated fighting in public. Always did, even as a rowdy teen she only did it to gain the respect from her peers, or so she said, but she always blushed inside and very much outside when the rowing was over. She hated people seeing her magic. Because they always mistook her for it. And that was just wrong. Just because the others made it their whole personality, didn’t mean she couldn’t be a more complex character.

At least she hoped. But the master had made it pretty clear she was expected to participate in the event and could no longer make excuses for herself to stay in the background. He had chosen a real team for the first team, but just in case the individual forces mattered most, there was to be a second, with all of the strongest mages left. Maybe he was also hoping it would help her to finally get over the trauma.

But they hadn’t talked. And now they were going team up in front of everyone. Not just the whole guild, but the whole country. And if that wasn’t enough for her to feel the heat going straight for her cheeks, they hadn’t talked. And they were mad. At least, she was mad. Absolutely revolted by the things he had done, and the way he had randomly come back to save the day, as if nothing happened, as if everything could be forgotten just because he showed up when they desperately needed him to.

Because it didn’t work like that, did it ?

She knew why she was angry, but she still couldn’t figure out why he seemed so. What did he have to be mad at her ? What did he have against her that they hadn’t already fought about in the last two years ? He couldn’t say she was weak and a coward anymore because she had slammed his strongest teammate flat into the ground when he tried to hurt her brother, and even convinced him to quit this whole ridiculous fight.

Because that was her new thing now, giving people the choice to recognise her superiority and quit before she actually beat them. It was more merciful than before. A nice compromise. Or so she justified herself.

And he certainly couldn’t say that it was only a one-time thing, because he knew she had been an inspector the trials, and that she had fought against the dark guild that attacked them. Even if she had lost. He was right on one point though. She was weak now, since it only took her siblings’ presence to have her capabilities shrunken. Evergreen proved it. Azuma proved it. And she seriously had to change that. Because if she couldn’t protect them with her magic, then what was truly the point of having it ?

She tried to work on it during her training. Tried to ignore their presence. Tried to fight against them but she still restrained herself, even if Elfman had been begging her to go harder. Because he wanted to become stronger. Stronger to get the S-class title next time, stronger than Natsu, Gray, Cana and all the others. And now that Laxus was back, he would start to train Freed again. And he would fall behind without the strongest sparring partner. And that was just unfair. Because she was the strongest. At least to him.

She didn’t realise he had woken up before she met his obscure gaze as he started sitting up. He had seemed in a bad shape ever since he stepped up on the train. He would never admit it if she asked, especially not in front of the others, but she was still certain he was also suffering from some kind of motion sickness. Just like Natsu. And apparently Gajeel, completely sprawled out on his seat, paler than ever before. That was okay. She would never tell a soul anyway.

She tried to ignore the look he gave her. She got so lost into her thoughts, she probably deserved it anyway. Probably stared him down like the worst serial killer. He seemed more puzzled than angry. Maybe that was a good thing. She tried to make herself more together. More absent. Like she didn’t care. But still cold so he would know she was angry. But not too distant, or Juvia, or Gajeel, or God forbid Jellal would catch on and start asking questions.

So, she had to be normal. But still cold. But her normal was warm and bubbly. But warm and cold was just normal, so just bubbly. But would he get it if she was just bubbly, or would he think that she was acting like she would with anyone else ? But certainly, he couldn’t think she was going to be all not angry at him after everything that happened ? He couldn’t be that dense, could he ? Well, he was a man. Or maybe that was sexist, but maybe that was okay because he was a man. Or maybe it wasn’t.

She got so caught up once again, it took her an embarrassing time to realise they were at a halt in the Capital and going down the train to get to their inn before the games began the next day. He must have realised she was weird because he frowned and waited just a little bit for her before jumping to the exit.

The sun was incredibly bright that day, she went a bit blind when she stepped outside. And he was still looking at her, but just from the corner of his eye. Still frowning though, but normal frowning. Or maybe that was just his eyebrows. They did have a very arched shape. Compared to hers anyway.

She couldn’t remember the last time she had visited the big city. That was a way of speech, she did remember, quite clearly even, but it seemed so long ago, it almost seemed like another era. Even if it was just two years prior. Well, nine. Before that cursed job got her working a lot closer to home. She even remembered him.

.

She had been looking for him.

She was a good stalker. Of course, he went to the town for the job, but then, he could disappear for days, weeks sometimes. He didn’t come back straight and wondered across the country to meet God knows who. Even when he was at home he didn’t stay long, tried to make an act of presence and had a fight with his grandfather before taking a job again, and disappearing.

And it worried her. Even if she would never admit it.

So she would go looking for him, after her own job of course. Always managed to get a look at his request, sometimes memorised the town from all the S-class ones so she could find him. She knew his favourite spots anyway. So she just did them in the order she would if she was coming back from that exact town. And she always found him. Always. He was as predictable as a pattern anyway. At least, when he didn’t fight.

She found him in a poker hangout this time.

The bouncer almost didn’t let her enter though. Her being a minor and everything. But by her angry look and very angry boots, he didn’t bother asking for her Id. Only frowned and asked if she was over eighteen. To which she lied of course. That was okay. It was only one year.

The whole building reeked of tobacco when she entered. With the smoke and the music, she almost thought she wouldn’t be able to see him in all this mess. But she didn’t need to see him. She could feel him. His magic. It was slow and heavy, and she could always tell when he was in the same room. He said it was because he was extremely strong. She said it was because she was extremely talented.

She could feel him across the room. So she went straight, ignored all the gawks and disgusting stares on her exposed skin. The dress was probably one of the sluttiest things she had ever worn. Lots of black und purple leather and corset-like laces, very short also, even if she was wearing shorts under it, just in case she had to fight. But it was worth it. It gave her just the right confidence to get down those stairs straight ahead to his table.

He almost choked on his drink when he noticed her in front of him. Weird, he usually caught on her presence way earlier. But he didn’t show it. She only noticed because he gulped very hard, and that was also not usual. So she smirked, because he was drunk and she could see that his pupils were already firing up looking at her attire and those boots that had just enough square heel to put her to his chin, but enough leather and laces to start a bondage club. She then saw him fuming because he knew it was amusing to her, and he just realised how many heads he would have to break if it turned out she hadn’t put on her shorts this time.

But he didn’t show anything, no more than he could control anyway. He only smirked a lot and gave a sign of the head to the guy in front of him so he would give her his place. And he did. One of the perks of the very short leather dress.

He was pretty, as always, to her very sick eyes at least. She couldn’t help staring at him, which was downright embarrassing because she knew he could feel her gaze on his forehead, even if he masterly avoided any kind of eye contact. His hair was just the good amount of ruffled to make her have to swallow that saliva, and he had just started wearing those shirts that made him seem all proper even when it was so lazily ironed and just buttoned enough to make her dread her decision to come. At least, she knew that, no matter how many times she told herself that the more an asshole he became, the more likely it became that she would eventually stop lusting after him, it was still not enough. Maybe the guild could take one for the team.

They didn’t talk at first, just played a few hands before he began speaking.

“What are you doing here, little demon ?”

She scoffed. Because she didn’t like that nickname. Or maybe she liked it too much. And she probably would slam the head of anyone who would dare call her like that. Except him, because she couldn’t, or maybe because it just sounded different in his mouth. Or maybe that was just her very sick ears.

“Just felt like playing.” She replied with that little nice voice. She was getting very good at that voice. He still managed to hear though, even over the very loud music banging in the background.

He knew she was lying. She had that smirk. There was absolutely no chance she had ended up here wearing that thing in this place without a pretty good reason. He knew she liked poker, but she also hated the smell of the smoke, even if she sometimes smoked herself. It was a whole thing. He knew she had come looking for him. Like all the other times she had randomly ended up exactly where he was without any good reason.

“I had a job not too far away. Got to pay the mortgage, you know.”

She was still murmuring, staring him down with those blue orbs that seemed more like daggers to him. He didn’t bother answering to that one though. He certainly wasn’t duped like the two losers losing all of their money at the same table. The one that had left surely thanked god he hadn’t gone against her. She was merciless. But he certainly wasn’t losing. Not with everything he had won before.

“Why didn’t you come home in a while ?” She wasn’t talking down anymore, her voice felt a lot deeper all of a sudden.

“I did.”

She shot a few daggers then.

“You know what I mean.” She was so serious.

He could see the vein pumping on her forehead, and it amused him. The seriousness in her pupils so mocking every other time.

“You haven’t been to the guild in almost a month.” Her voice was also trembling a little now.

He sighed. He was getting sick with her questions, and the accusations. Just because he didn’t want to be like all those losers that treated his guild like a damn amusement park, and then dared saying it was their family or some other crap.

It was exhausting.

“Didn’t have the energy to deal with the old man.” He sighed again and tried to hide the anger behind his cold and smirky stare. But she didn’t let him, continued to stare him down with that horrible serious stare. If only her eyes weren’t so deep. “What’s it to you ?”

She didn’t answer then. Only stared like his question was stupid, and indeed it was. Very stupid. Because if she were to disappear for a month, he would be looking for her too. Even if they were just friends, or something like that. He knew he would.

She sighed again, more angrily this time, more trembling. She got up, having taken enough money from their tablemates. So he got up also. Because he could feel it was growing into a fight and he didn’t want to get kicked out of yet another bar because of her. Not like the time she had slammed a bottle onto a barmaid’s head, which had later turned out to be the owner of the bar. Well maybe that was on him, because he had a tendency to flirt back when pretty bartenders made cute passes at him. Even if it was just to get more tip money out of him.

So he followed her as she went out. Ignored and refrained himself from death staring at each and every glare that dared to go up and down that one damn cloth that looked like a dress and definitely deserved to get burned. If only he wasn’t so damn scared of hurting her forever if he dared to tear it apart himself. She didn’t seem to care, though. She never did. Never showed it at the very least. Or not often. And certainly, never in public.

“Why the cold shoulder all of a sudden ?” He smirked and tried to pester her as they walked to the hotel every Fairy Tail mage stayed in this shitty town that claimed to be a capital. The owner had a deal with the old man. An old friend or so he said. Not in the same room however. To his great dismay. Or his great relief. Now that he realised the length of her pyjamas probably equalled her dress’s.

“Because you’re an asshole that only cares about himself. That’s why.” She didn’t even look at him, but he could hear her stress each and every word, and it was difficult not to take it personally.

“Well, maybe you should accept that now, and stop trying to change me.” He still got very angry. Couldn’t help it. “It would save us a lot of time, you know.”

She turned to face him then, in the hallway where their rooms both laid.

“Why won’t you stop trying to pretend that this is who you are.”

“Because it is.”

He almost screamed that one. Well at least, spoke it very loudly. More like whispered it very high in the quiet hallway. If he cared just a single bit, he would have been worried to wake the other customers. But he didn’t. He didn’t have to scream though. He was so close to her, he barely had to take a step to touch her. And she wasn’t walking away. Even if her eyes trembled and he could swear she wanted to cry. But she never would. Never in front of him. And his stomach instantly crawled.

“No, it’s not.”

He would have sworn her voice was already crackled up with tears when she said that last one. But he was already unlocking his door. And when he tried to look behind him, he only saw her own door slamming. Not bothering not to wake all the other customers either. He would apologise in the morning. Not for what he had just said but for the screaming part. Or the angry whispering part. She wasn’t the one he was angry at. He simply hated his grandfather and every one of those losers that transformed his guild into a flying circus. Not her, he would never be angry at her.

If only she hadn’t already gone away when he woke up.

.

When they arrived in the room they apparently shared, nobody even dared to say a word. The blonde fell onto the bed closest to the window, headphones still stuck in his ears, like he was ready to sleep some more. Which was weird because he usually chose the bed closest to the door when he was sleeping with other people. How she knew that, she would never admit. But she felt almost disappointed because she had planned to visit the city a little, and could have used some company, and a good occasion to talk face to face alone.

Jellal only excused himself to go outside, awfully quiet since this whole travel had begun, probably to join his guild and talk about his own goal that was worth pretending to be a member of theirs. Which was a shame, because she would have loved to learn more about the man that still had Erza completely obsessed with him since God knows when. She would have found it funny if her own situation wasn’t already so damn ridiculous.

Juvia was awfully silent too. Getting her stuff on the bed in front of Laxus, and since Gajeel had already taken the one beside hers and Jellal the one in the corner, or put Mystogan’s stuff on it, it meant that she had to take the one right next to Laxus. Great. That wasn’t bothering her at all. After all, they had at least a whole meter between them, it wasn’t bothering at all. She tried to smile nicely at her guildmate who started her long babbling about how she planned to find out where the other team was, and the restaurant she had reserved at to go with Gray. Adding to the long list of almost ridiculous obsessions Mirajane had to solve to understand how three of the strongest women in the country had gotten themselves into.

And how on earth, she had ended up as one of them.

When she was gone though, there were only them and Gajeel left, which reached a whole new level of awkward. For some reason, he had taken up babbling about the games and strategy as he called it, which basically sumed up to how they should let him take care of Natsu so that they could concentrate on taking out the other bigger fishes in the other guilds. Which was probably the weirdest part of it all, because she always took him to be one of the silent and broody ones. Or maybe he too could feel the horrible awkwardness to decide it was best to take the conversation into his own hands.

Which said a lot about her own trouble, because she was usually the one that lifted the atmosphere with her nonsense babbling.

She wasn’t apparently the only one startled at that development because it turned out to be enough for Laxus to take his headphones off and gaze at her with the most puzzled and frowning look she had ever seen on him. Which made her chuckle, but she could only allow herself a bit if she didn’t want to laugh at her guildmate’s face, so she bit her lower lip to ensure she wouldn’t.

It didn’t seem to hide it though, because she could also hear him chuckle in her right ear, so she bit stronger, and still it proved enough for Gajeel to stop talking and blush at what was probably their incredibly amused faces. It was cute. In some very weird way, she would have said that he kind of looked like the blonde when his cheeks burned, but he didn’t have eyebrows, so it was way less funny. Or maybe it was just the stress they were both in.

“Screw you guys.” He finally yelled, going for the exit, probably to see the town with the others. “You’re supposed to be the ones planning all that stuff anyway.” And then he slammed the door behind him.

And then, they were alone.

Maybe it had been his plan all along, waiting them out until they were all gone so they could finally talk. Alone. In the room they shared with the others, so nobody would bother them for at least a few hours. It was such a good and simple plan, she was almost ashamed she hadn’t thought of it herself. Or maybe, he thought it had been her plan, and that was the reason she wasn’t already out to go meet the master and her siblings. Maybe she should have thought of it sooner and went out before they ended up like that, because right now, her mind was blank.

What had she thought ? Being alone with him ? She hadn’t the slightest clue what to say to him first. Or on which tone they were supposed to talk now.

“So ?” He asked, startling her, still nonchalantly laid out on his temporary bed. Glaring at her like she was supposed to know the answer, or whatever question it was supposed to be.

“So what ?” She had meant to use her nice voice, but it came out a lot deeper and aggressive she had meant to be. She didn’t do good on stress anymore. Maybe the whole competition thing wasn’t that good of an idea.

“Do we have a plan ?”

She only blinked before she understood the conversation hadn’t changed subjects like her mind did at least three times in the last hour.

“You mean for the games ?” It came out nice again, which was probably the weirdest switch she had ever done, but he didn’t seem to be bothered by it. Continued to stare at her, almost like he didn’t remember that they had like a thousand other things to talk about. Or maybe that was just her.

“Well, I don’t mean for dinner, I’m pretty sure the Thunder Legion already has it covered for me on that.” He looked back at his Sound Pod, even if he hadn’t headphones on anymore, maybe just to avoid her anxious questioning gaze.

Dinner ? Well, not dinner apparently. God, what if her siblings had planned to go eat with the thunder legion ? They had a weird habit of hanging out with them since the trials. To her great relief, because it meant that she didn’t have to find too many excuses to be the one to take his order, but also her great dismay because even with that, she still hadn’t found out any way to drag him out alone.

Except now, but now she couldn’t figure out a single way to start the conversation in a natural way. Or any way.

“Well, what kind of plan do you want to make ?” She tried to smile more peacefully but he seemed pretty obsessed with his screen.

“I don’t know.” He seemed a bit taken aback at this one. Like he wasn’t the one that had just asked the question. “Like, do you want to be the one to take Erza out when the time comes, or, do I have to do it ?”

Erza ? She chuckled a bit. On the one hand, because she had tried very hard to avoid that particular question and he had jumped right on it, on the other, because she had never really enjoyed hearing that name into his mouth. Because she was a bit stressed out, and ridiculously jealous, even if it took her years to admit it, when any other girl’s name crossed his lips. So she just blushed.

“Oh.” She blushed even more, and he started staring at her again. She didn’t even have the reflex to keep herself from looking down, so she was more staring at her sheets. And God, that was a stupid state to be in when he asked an even better stupid question. “I… I don’t even know if I could, I kind of skipped a lot of training, you know.” She was stammering now, and blushing even harder if that was possible. “Can’t we just hope another guild will take care of that ?” She tried to smile naturally behind her blush, but it certainly wasn’t fooling him.

“Can we really ?” He chuckled at that one. And for some reason, that made her displeased blush deeper. Well, she knew the reason. Because that terribly sounded like a compliment, and she honestly couldn’t handle any compliment from him about her. She just couldn’t.

“Fine, I’ll try.” She snapped a bit. Which only made him frown and smirk even harder. And she really hated him right now.

“You’ll try ?” He infuriately insisted.

“I said I’ll do it.” She tried not to snap too hard but as that must have felt harsher than she meant when she got up at the same time to gather the things she needed. She really needed some air. And Elfman and Lisanna were probably already waiting for her somewhere as they had planned to check on the first team only in the evening. And she was hungry. And in the worst state possible to handle any kind of useful conversation with him right now. And screw it, surely, they were going to have plenty of other occasions to talk alone this week, now that they were supposed to hang out all day together.

She only heard him chuckle behind her as she was reaching for the door, probably a lot redder and more distressed than she ever felt like explaining to anyone that would see her coming out of this room. Because she really didn’t feel like explaining why he was so infuriating. And clueless. Like how couldn’t he see that she wanted to talk to him ? Why couldn’t he try it himself instead of staring at her like she was the weird one ? And why on earth was she still so stupid ?

“Okay. Little demon.” Screw him.

Screw him.

It was ironic. If she had worn her dark clothes and boots, and the deep frown he knew her, she wouldn’t have looked just as sad. Just more emo. But she didn’t wear those anymore. She wore long dresses in so many colors it would be too long to list them all. Yellow, pink, some still black but the last time he had seen one was almost three months ago, just before the Grand Magic Games had ended and with them, the team they both belonged to.

Not that he cared that much about that team. He had his own, and, maybe they weren’t perfect with their stupid interests and fights, maybe they weren’t as strong and sometimes very aggravating, but they were his team. And he did kind of enjoyed having one, a real team, not just pretending bodyguards that followed him everywhere and did his every bidding.

Because that was tiring. And lonely.

They were still weird around him though, still hesitated a lot before being honest with him, before disagreeing with whatever he had said before. Apparently, that took some effort. Or maybe he hadn’t quite succeeded at making himself less scary, and inaccessible.

Because apparently that was his goal now. Being less arrogant, out of reach, maybe mean was the word. And more down to earth, approachable, friendly. And god was that hard.

People had more or less deemed him inapproachable since forever, since he had gotten that scar at least. And he could get that really. He wouldn’t come and spark up conversation with someone that looked like a hitman for the mob either. But he still tried.

“Do you even like me ?”

He didn’t know. He felt like he didn’t know her. Like she lived a million miles away, out of reach, out of perception. He didn’t know what to say to her.

Maybe.

Maybe not.

It was hard to like someone that felt like a stranger.

He thought she was beautiful.

Honestly.

She always had been beautiful. He had his reservations at first, with the whole pink and bow thing. It felt so very strange. Compared to the whole black skirt and thorn shit from before, it was so very strange. Not that she didn’t rock it. She looked good in anything. Probably one of the perks of true natural beauty. Or maybe it was just him, maybe she could look like a total disaster and he would still find her beautiful. Not that he would ever tell her that.

She was hot too. That he would tell. Like breathtakingly hot. There were days he wondered how anyone could go on with their day without getting their eyes glued up to her ass. And other places. It was so fucking hard. So many times he caught himself staring so hard he swore he could have carved holes into her body. But he always hid it. Didn’t want to make her uncomfortable, especially since she had seemed to change her mind and forget all about him.

Until she caught him. And he tried to own it, because getting caught was one thing, but chickening out was a totally different one. And honestly, he had never seen someone getting so red so fast. Which was weird, because he’d think that after trying to bone her ass so many times, she’d at least know that he had to be staring sometimes. But no, her cheeks fired up like a poppy until the demon kicked in and before he even knew it, he was caught in some hot flirty game that somehow ended in his bed. And his couch two weeks after. Until she had to leave because of her siblings still being up and worried.

And that was it. She avoided him now. Sometimes blushed a little when she caught him glancing. But never getting back in the game. Which was weird because she was the one that had invented it. He did try to talk to her but she would always be too busy, jumpy, and fled at his mere approach. Even after another job and a good week, she still wouldn’t talk to him. So, he stared. Tried to decipher what the hell could be going on in that pretty little head of hers. Tried to catch her eyes to read something in them.

They were quite expressive. Her eyes. He had always loved them. They were so blue. Fuck, that sounded stupid, but they did have that hypnotizing thing. Something about the color. And the emotions that seemed to turmoil inside. She always had been emotional. Even with her angry glare, it was still angry. Whether she cried, or screamed, or schemed, or tried to put him a facer. It was still raw. And passionate. And so very much like her. And he did like that.

Maybe that was the biggest change. Maybe the one thing that definitely wasn’t like her, was the happy poker face she always seemed to have on. Honestly he didn’t care about her pretending to be stupid to lure money in. She was an idealist, but she definitely wasn’t stupid, or genuinely coy. Maybe that was her own way of being less threatening, so people would forget she could destroy a table just by stepping on it. And it seemed to be working. Maybe he could learn from that.

Maybe he could learn how she managed to always seem interested in whatever bullshit people blathered at her. He listened to crumbs from time to time, with his headphones still on, so nobody would suspect him overhearing. They always seemed to forget he had a dragon slayer ear anyway. And god was it boring. One day he spent an entire evening wondering how long she could take about Macao’s accounting problems before throwing her own cash register at his head. But she only listened, didn’t even offer any kind of advice, just nodded, and smiled, and empathized like she was genuinely caught by the problem.

Maybe she was. He didn’t know anymore. He could have sworn the old Mira, if that was a decent way to call her, wouldn’t have cared two pennies about his bullshit story. And up until recently, he thought it was all just an act, that she was still the same inside, just terrified of being alone again. But now he didn’t know anymore.

He didn’t know her anymore.

And he didn’t know how to get to know her again. It wasn’t like he could repeat history. Lure her back into being his friend to receive her thoughts.

“I don’t know how you handle all that shit.” He tried one day. As she was the wiping the glass the last chatterbox had left behind. But she only frowned at him and shrugged.

“I like hearing people’s stories.” She simply answered as she put the glass down and proceeded to pour him the pint he ordered.

“How ?” He smirked, he might have been a little too arrogant on that one, because she frowned even deeper. Maybe he didn’t know what made her happy anymore, but he could still definitely tell when she was getting annoyed at him. “I mean, why ?”

She smiled a bit and shrugged again. “I guess I just find people interesting.”

“People, maybe.” It felt harder than it should to hear that coming from him, from the way she eyed him. “But not their groceries and accounting stories.” He tried to chuckle, but she wouldn’t let him. Just sighed and shrugged yet again, and he was the one getting annoyed at that.

“I don’t know.” Oh, but she knew. “I just feel like people get the most real about mundane things.”

And there she went, to wait on some random that had called out, and hear all about his life. So he gave up on it and went back upstairs with his beer. It’s not like she was going to wonder about him anyway.  

She was too busy for that.

She always had been hardworking. Only Erza could compete with her on that front. Always so focused. Even as a broke thirteen-year-old. Especially as a broke thirteen-year-old with two other kids to look after. She used to train so hard he sometimes caught her walking home with broken ribs, actually had to make her visit Polyussica once or twice. It terrified him sometimes, how far she could get, and he wasn’t the last one to exceed his limits. After the second time though, he did have to rat her out to the old man to make sure she wouldn’t kill herself. But she would never stop.

Even now, in a much tranquiller life, she still refused to step down, took so few days off, she had to be forced so the old man wouldn’t be arrested for violating workers’ rights. Not that she would take any money for helping with the administrative work and even took care of him, which was also not on her paycheck. Not that the old man hadn’t offered her to put it there several times.  

But no, she was simply unstoppable. Until he tried.

“What is it you’re thinking so hard about tonight ?” The old man had asked him that night, after he just came back from his job and somehow ended up having dinner with him in the house he had mostly grown up in. But he only shrugged to the question, he was annoying like that.

“Is it a girl ?”

He only received a death glare but that didn’t seem to destabilize him.

“Did you have a fight with one of them recently ?”

He didn’t answer but he could definitely the weight of his glare exploring the blonde’s face as it sighed from desperation.

“Or is there one in particular ?” He was definitely annoying too.

“I’m fine.”

He only slowed down not to finish his plate too fast, or he would be left with nothing else but to find a lie to tell.

“Well, I’m from the old school, as you’ve probably guessed.” Nothing ever stopped him either. “But I always find that flowers work wonders with women.”

He lifted an eyebrow, then.

“Except if she has pollen allergy.”

He scoffed and grunted, trying to mutter again that that wasn’t the problem but clearly wasn’t convincing enough.

“Except if she doesn’t like flowers either. Then, you should never, and I mean it, never get flowers for her then. It will only convince her that you don’t care about what she wants. And believe me, you don’t want that.”

Someone, make it stop.

“But if she does like them, then believe me, it doesn’t matter if it seems a bit too easy or cliché even for her, it’s worth a try. No matter why she’s mad at you…”

He did growl a bit, and sent him the most frightening glare he could get out, and planted his fork a little bit too hard into the plate, but a lot less than he had wanted to. Progress came with time.

“Alright, alright.” The old man exclaimed and went back to his own plate with a loud sigh. “Solve your own problems alone, if you’re such a grump.” Still didn’t flinch under the weight of his death glare though.

Like that was going to solve anything.

It’s not like he knew if she even liked flowers.

Surely, she did, right ?

He did go back though. To the guild. Even if it was so late. Especially because it was so late. He was growing sick of the silent treatment like he was the only one guilty there. If she had changed her mind about him, then the least thing she could do was informing him so. Because he had other things to do than wonder about her demonic ways. And he would tell her. Tonight. Maybe not as an ultimatum, but just some kind of clarification in case she was confusing him with some random she could string along to lick the ground behind her.

But the guild wasn’t empty. He thought it would be, but maybe that was the reason it wasn’t closed yet. There were still some people getting drunk and laughing way too loudfor his liking. So he didn’t jump on her immediately. Because the last thing he wanted was other people, guildmates, butting into his business and snitching to the old man about him. No, it was private matter. So, he simply settled again at the counter and ordered his evening drink. Whiskey. Stat.

She did kind of look taken aback at his view. Batted her eyes a little before fetching the bottle. Even if she already knew he was back in town.

“Weren’t you supposed to have dinner with the master tonight ?” She asked while filling the glass, just a little too much, must have picked up on his mood. He shrugged.

“Please tell me you two didn’t fight again.” She smirked a bit, still staring at him as she counted the register of the day. How she could multitask that way, that, he would never understand.

“No.”

He might have answered a bit too quickly. “He just tired me.”

“Oh.” She grinned. “So what ? You’re going to drink your sorrows here until the earth turns around and you two magically get along again ?”

Well, at least she was still a bully.

“Well, it did work for Erza and you.” She did still raise her eyebrows too. “I’m just hopeful.” He added as he emptied the glass and gave her the sign to fill it again.

“Well…” She put the bottle back down. “I think whiskey had a lot more to do with that than the earth turning back on its axis.”

He did chuckle at this one, or maybe he was just getting drunk. Maybe that could explain why she suddenly looked so damn hot again. Maybe he was doomed. Doomed to stare at her until his eyes fell out flat on the ground, or until she got sick of it and beat the hell out of him until he dug his way down there.

 She only ignored it for now. And he wasn’t hiding it. They were practically alone anyway. Just some leftover drunks that called out to her to get a refill. He did take a sip but he should too definitely slow down on the booze if he didn’t want her to wipe his ass from the ground. It was her ass that desperately needed some attention.

He did like her smile too. When she greeted some of the people outside. Even if it wasn’t quite the same as before. He wondered if that one he knew was gone for good. If maybe, he should have imprinted it a bit more on his mind. The joyful, genuine grin she had between two very aggressive growls. Maybe if he had known it would become so rare. Or that he wouldn’t be invited anymore when it did get out.

Fuck, that sounded sad.

“All sorrows not drunk yet ?” She did take him out of his reverie. He didn’t even notice when he had stopped watching.

“Nope.” He did empty his glass again though. “But, maybe it could go faster if you drank them with me.” He almost forgot to send a look down the hall, to assure no one had heard his bold pathetic attempt at getting a date, because that would spread around like wildfire. But there were completely alone now. So he just glared back at her.

And there it was. Not the smile but the glance. The knowing glance. The only one that indeed confirmed he wasn’t completely delusional, and they were indeed something. Something more than just guildmates that occasionally joked around. And he didn’t know he needed that. The annoyed, playful, demonic glare that told him he was walking on damn thin ice.

Not that he indeed gave one damn.

Until she slammed another glass just before his face, and proceeded to install herself on the stool next to him. She called his bluff, fine.

He tried to gather himself. Because, alcohol or no alcohol, he was getting kind of nervous at this development. Even avoided her glare discreetly as she calmy sipped down her own glass of whiskey and waited for his confession.

It was time.

Time for the big talk, the not so ultimatum he had to give her so this whole charade would finally end. The time to tell her he wasn’t planning on following her around for the next two more years. The time to decide if they would ever be like that again. Alone. Personal. Intimate. And it was sad.

Because fuck, he didn’t want it to end.

“You know, I did think about it and I don’t think mundane stories are as boring as you make them out to be.”

Well, maybe it didn’t have to end today.

“And what’s so enthralling about tomatoes, huh ?” He took a sip without getting his eyes off her pensive frown. He liked when she got lost into thoughts, she always had that little pout that could be weirdly classified as cute. She seemed a bit more natural then. To his own standards. She had stopped with the ever-staying smile and high-pitched remarks. She looked more serious, deep in whatever reflection could be going on about leeks and potatoes.

“I just think you can’t ever know someone if you don’t know what their everyday looks like.”

He grunted in semi-approval, but he honestly hadn’t really thought about it that way. He definitely knew what her day-to-day could be going on, didn’t mean he had the slightest clue about who she was. Since he couldn’t even tell if she would try to make him swallow the flowers whole if he ever bought her some. Knowing at what time she was doing inventory didn’t change anything to it.

And even if she did like them, it didn’t mean she could like any type of flowers. Didn’t some women care about sorts, and colors, and meanings or stuff ? Because he didn’t know anything about it. Thank god he didn’t listen to the old man because that clearly sounded like some elaborate trap where you could get ghosted for getting pink roses instead of carnations, or whatever they were supposed to be called, or even the red roses. They were surely better ways to die.

Would she even kill him ? Metaphorically, nobody was talking about killing anybody here. But could she still get angry ? He felt like she could recently, during their recent intercalations, when she was drunk or particularly vexed about something. But she never felt mad. At least not like the fiery pit she used to. Maybe he was the one that wanted her to get furious. To shove him against a wall, try to get a knife below his throat, or just yell very loudly at him. And fuck, did he hate the yelling, hurt his ears like hell. But still, just to show she still cared. They were bound to fight anyway, and if he had to choose between her getting angry or cry. He knew which one he liked better.

It took him a while to notice she had stopped talking. Stared at him blankly, with worry spread all around her eyes that bore holes into his face. Fuck. He did mean to listen. Guess he just zoned out again. And she had noticed. Fuck, fuck. How stupid did he have to be ? It was only going to get harder to convince her to talk to him alone. Fuck. Stupid. Or maybe, she was going to pin it on his “fight” with his grandfather. Yes, that was his chance. He just had to make her believe he was a bit distraught about it and she would forget about his stupidness.

If only she didn’t stare at him like that, didn’t lift her eyebrows with that demonic glare clearly pissed off at his lack of consideration. Or maybe that was the hand on her thigh. Fuck, he hardly even noticed he had it there. Not that he took it off, chickening out and everything… It felt nice anyway. And she hadn’t said anything, so maybe she didn’t even notice either. Unlikely ? maybe. But she must not have been too bothered by it, or she would have said something, right ? Not that he wanted her to think he was only interested in one thing from her, because that was certainly not the case. Otherwise, he wouldn’t be here making a fool of himself like that.

This whole shit was getting a bit too hard on his brain.

He saw her smirk. So maybe they were okay. She did take a breath to say something, but he didn’t let her.

“Do you like flowers ?”

He kind of blurted it out. He knew it because she widened her eyes so much, they seemed bigger that he ever though they could be. And she got red. Like instantly. Good thing to know he was still doing that too. And looked down with some semi-held back chuckle. It was still hot too.

“Wh-what…?”

He did see her teeth now, so he definitely took her by surprise.

“Flowers.” He tried again, never chickening out was his motto. “Do you particularly like them or not ?”

She was so red he thought she was going to explode.

“Well…” He saw her blink to get some answer out. “I do have a garden.”

He almost spit his drink out.

“A what now ?”

She blinked.

“You know, like a thing to grow plants in.” She was amusing him now. “I mean, it’s more like a vegetable garden, really, but I do have some flowers in it.”

“So, you like them ?”

She blushed again. “Well yeah… I mean, not every kind… but still.”

Huh, definitely a trap then. Or maybe he should go get a look at that garden just to make sure he wasn’t digging his own tomb.

“Lisanna does most of the watering too… since I don’t have much time and…”

She must have thought he zoned out again, because she suddenly stopped and looked down to her glass to swallow the rest in one hit as he stared again. And god, that skin of hers did feel nice on his hand. And she still didn’t seem to mind. Only gave him the glare. And fuck it was hot. But it would look even nicer on that counter if only he could gather the right timing to get her butt on it. And that back of hers. And she would stare at him with those eyes and it would just…

He had to stop. Or do something. One or the other. If only she could stop breathing so close because that was definitely wasn’t helping his hard-on to slow down. Or breathe closer, either way was good. Fuck, she smelled good too. Like jasmine, and vanilla, and sweat. He couldn’t explain it. But it wasn’t helping. And making him a bit crazy. Like turning her over that counter and make her taste the wood kind of crazy. She did like it rough. That he knew.

And why wasn’t he doing it again ?

Oh yeah, because he didn’t want her to think it was the only thing that drove him here. Maybe he should just stop thinking about it. Or stop thinking at all.

Yeah, maybe that was the best option.

Option she obviously didn’t consider.

He did feel her hand tremble a little when she grabbed his face to make him look straight back again to her. Even if the crash of her lips that followed didn’t at all. And he didn’t ask any more questions. Practically jumped on her to grip her all and finally get her on that counter that was this close to obsess him. And she probably expected it because she only threw her arms around his back to force him close and shove her tongue right into his mouth.

And the grabbing. Fuck he missed it. Hadn’t changed one bit. Even grew more aggressive and restless. She was less shy, didn’t hesitate before gripping his shirt to slide her hands under it. Almost bit him as he grunted, just a little. But he wasn’t going to let her have her way. Almost tear her dress apart when he tried to free her chest from what was to him a terrible prison. Heard her whimper as the grasp roughed even harder on her butt and felt just how warm and restless she must have felt all this time. Or maybe that was just him.

He didn’t think he had waited this long for this, but now he knew he had been this close to dying.

Fuck, even her breath was hot. And those moans. He could have killed himself right there just to get another one. Not that he needed too.

If only he could have gotten just one more before she pulled away when they were done.

She was breathing so roughly he worried for three seconds he had been too harsh. But then remembered he was pretty much in the same state and just collapsed on the stool back again to get the minimum clothes back on. Not that she cared.

She was actually even more gorgeous that way. All spread out on the counter with that long dress of hers hitched above her knees, barely even covering that her underwear was long gone with her bra that probably laid down somewhere behind the bar. Not that he minded, he always thought her breasts looked way better without any kind of incarceration. Because it was a crime at this state.

She was still panting when she looked back at him and blushed all over again at the staring. Cute, yes, but not only. With her bangs all stuck to her forehead by the sweat. And if biology wasn’t against him, he might have gotten another boner just from that view. She had that smile too. The one he liked better than any other kind.

He did walk her home that night. Would have walked her way farer if she hadn’t declined his invitation. Because she had to get up early and make breakfast in the morning for those dorky siblings that obviously couldn’t even manage to make their own breakfast alone. Maybe he should find a way to get Ever to make Elfman get a cooking class. Lisanna would surely follow just to make fun of them the whole time, but it was an almost flawless plan. Didn’t mean he couldn’t be a gentleman until he found a way to enforce it.

He was even motivated to hear about whatever story she wanted, but for some reason she had gotten quite silent since she had gotten her clothes back on.

“You’re okay ?” He found a way to ask a few blocks from the guild.

But she only had a sad smile when she nodded. And he didn’t like that. It got him nervous, even if he couldn’t think about one thing he could have done to upset her between their heated session on the counter and now. Maybe he should have offered to clean it before they took off, or maybe that was too stupid a question to be the problem at hand.

He tried to focus back on her but she still seemed determined to walk silently. And he wasn’t going to engage. They had a strict share of tasks, and he wasn’t the talker here. If only he had quit his idiotic thinking before they climbed the stairs to her doorway and she turned back to face him, still silent and back to trembling a little. And he knew he had to do something.

He wanted to kiss her. A lot. And grab her everywhere again. But for some reason he got afraid she might recoil at his touch. So, he settled for her cheek. Just one kiss, a bit too long to be friendly. She didn’t pull away but she did stare at him awkwardly before her cheeks got red and she turned back to unlock her door as he walked back down. But he could still feel her glance when he passed the small gate.

“Laxus ?” He turned back. A little bit too fast but she didn’t seem to notice.

She did look sad there. All alone in the night surrounded by the silence. Up the steps, glaring down, almost teary as their eyes met. Her voice was shaking, and it left him kind of astounded when she articulated the words that would have him spiraling for the next two weeks.

“Do you even like me ?”

Desperately.

“Do you even like me ?”

But fuck, was that hard.

“Do you even like me ?”

Because if she could ask that. Then maybe it was doomed. Maybe it wasn’t even worth trying.

“Do you even like me ?”

“You’re not honestly still stuck on that, are you ?” She only responded, not even raising her eyes from the Heart Kreuze magazine she had been skimming over for a good thirty minutes, ignoring the traditional ruckus going on in the background.

The new collection was bad. It was disheartening, to say the least. She couldn’t even figure out if that last armor was supposed to be pretty, or frightening. So basic. Erza was not a vain woman but she was still a woman with taste. She liked a ribbon here and there to give the steel some unseen twist, if the armor didn’t at least bother to be powerful.

It was a pity. She used to love this creator’s collections. The armor she was wearing at this very second was one of his. And it truly was her favorite. So pretty, and shiny, and just revealing enough. She didn’t like to be vulgar. The knight mage contemplated what people would think if she threw and sliced that magazine right there on the spot. To punish it for being so lame. Or give it to Natsu, so that he could light a nice little warming fire to comfort her saddened soul.

“Are you even listening to me ?” The card mage was looking right through her now.

But, if it could give her a chance to avoid this truly uncomfortable conversation, then, maybe it was worth a few more pages. Everyone deserved a second chance, even a very bad armor, with way too many knots for it to be practical.

“What is it that you want to say, Cana ?” She finally gave in. Because looking at a bad collection was one thing but doing so with a drunk shooting daggers at you was too much for the redhead to handle.

They were glaring at each other. And not the drunken contest kind. Like when the brunette tried to make her confess about her whereabouts that night, when she and Jellal went for a lengthy walk along the canal while the other members were too busy getting hammered on whatever was left in those kegs. It had been a nice evening. She liked to recall it. Everyone deserved to have a soft spot for one night. Even if she would rather die than admit it to her friends.

It’s not like it was any of their business.

But no. Today was not one of those days. It was one these rare ones when the card mage abandoned her nonchalant, non-caring, humored look and actually managed to care about something. If only for one minute. And it was weird, to say the least. Which it’s why the redhead had felt the need to give in on her inquiries and tried to pay attention to her friend’s revendications. If only for one minute.

“I can’t believe you and Mira would go drinking, and gossiping, and not even think about inviting me.” She was trying to be mad, but she could see her purple eyes trembling. “I thought we were friends.” She stopped glaring, drank a sip without much want, just to have an excuse to look away. “The three of us, I mean.”

“I am your friend.” The redhead tried to defend herself. She felt a bit taken aback, not really understanding yet why she was being put on trial. She had nothing to reproach herself. Nothing.

But she was only met with the angry purple glare.

“I don’t just hang out with people I don’t like.” She added, not living her eyesight for one second, oddly becoming more and more engaged in that conversation. Because it was stupid.

“I know we’re friends.” She took another sip, with a sigh to go along with it. Which was starting to annoy her. She didn’t like people to make grievances about her and then be all vague about it. It was immature. And stupid, did she mention that ?

“I’m pretty sure Mira’s your friend too.” She was the one glaring now. Getting more and more worked up about how the brunette just wouldn’t glance at her, avoiding her gaze like she wasn’t the one that had started this whole ridiculous thing. She tried to take a deep breath, people told her sometimes that she could get worked up quick, and scary, and that it wasn’t enticing. She tried to smile, but it didn’t come out right.

“I know that.”

“Then, what’s your problem ?” She was hissing now, tried to feign indifference. She felt her cheeks burn with the awkwardness going up her face. The brunette didn’t get up, but she almost turned her back to her, to focus on whatever else was happening inside the hall at this very moment.

“Forget it.”

Oh, but she wasn’t.

She tried to take another deep breath, as she closed the magazine. Tried to gather her thoughts to clarify the situation. She didn’t know how long it took, but it must have been longer than she thought because the card mage almost seemed startled when she spoke again.

“We don’t do it that often.” She stammered a little. But it definitely got her interest because she immediately jumped back on glaring at her. All eyes and serious again. “Just when I’m here. And the guild is slow.” She breathed, and she really needed it. “We would do it in the guild with you, really… It’s just so noisy here.”

She frowned so heavily, her blood made a turn.

“Why didn’t you invite me, then ?”

She sighed again. She felt put on trial. As if it hadn’t been difficult enough to get there with Mira. Let alone justifying herself.

“We didn’t mean to exclude you.” She got a little bit quieter now, tried to shut her stomach from crawling even at the way the brunette would make her eyes roll. “It wasn’t intentional, I swear.”

They got silent. The redhead truly prayed it was the end of this. But she felt bad, especially because she had never seen the brunette caring about something so trivial, she always seemed to be the laid-back kind. But she could get it. After all, she too, liked to gather with her girlfriends. And didn’t like it that much when she found out they had been gathering without her, even if they had a good reason (such as her being stuck on a pretty long job without any exact date of return).

“It just started more like a sad thing, really.” She started again as the card mage explored her face with attention, no longer looking angry. Just hurt. And curious. “Back when things weren’t…” She tried hard to find a word for this one, but they just seemed to elude her. “…great.”

Cana took a sip. Not replying, glaring at her continuously as to invite her to elaborate, but that wasn’t going to happen. Expecting an apology was one thing. But expecting her to confound herself in excuses and lick the ground in repentance was a totally different one. She wasn’t Mother Theresa. She could ask Mira for that one. Not that the thought of the white-haired on her knees wasn’t strangely enticing.

“We didn’t think you’d want to join on the pity party, that’s all.” She meant to close the discussion but brunette clearly didn’t intend on letting her go away with it. Staring at her like she was, her chest almost spread out on the table before her.

“Why didn’t you invite me after ?”

“Because it wasn’t supposed to become a thing.” She was getting spirited again, but her tone seemed to have very little effect on the card mage. It’s not like she was going to hit her when she was the one in the wrong.

They fell silent again.

She knew she had messed up. Even messed up her explanation, and her apology. Maybe she needed to get to that before the brunette would get up and leave. She liked having friends, and even if they didn’t hang out very often, it was a good one. A very good one. With someone she respected. And hoped she was respected by. And Erza didn’t like losing the respect of someone like that.

“But, , I guess it did.” The brunette turned again. And there she could see it. The hurt, the pain behind her friend’s eyes. And her stomach crawled again. “I’m sorry.” She gained a smile then. It was reassuring. “We didn’t think you’d care about it.”

The brunette frowned. But the glow didn’t look sad anymore, more like a bit offended.

“Well, it did use to be the three of us going to town before.” She finally replied, a bit snarky for her taste. “Why wouldn’t I care that you two decided to go on without me ?”

“Going to town ?” The redhead almost spit her drink out. “It happened like three times in like two years.” She gave her the eyes. “You’re really sure that alcohol hasn’t messed up with your brain and you just remember it all in double ?”

That got her a laugh. And a loud one. Covered by the ongoing general noise behind them. She felt herself expiring, like she had been holding her breath until now.

“Well, it was enough for my heart.” The card mage laughed as she took another sip and sent the redhead an amused look, like for one second she had become the funniest person on earth.

God, she felt bad.

“Well, I don’t know about you…” The knight mage started again, with an unusual grin. “But I think Mira’s been getting out with a little too much lately.” The smile was mutual as they both leaned over the table, like two villains plotting out their revenge. “And it has definitely become a two persons’ job.”

And from the smile she received, she knew the combat was won.

And from the look the white-haired sent her from behind the bar, she had definitely felt the cold shiver going up her spine.

.

It’s not that Mirajane had a sixth sense. But she usually was in tune with the general ambiance of her life. And for an unknown reason, that night, when Lisanna had unexpectedly volunteered (which was weird in itself, especially with Laxus out of town for many more days) to take her evening shift, so that she could go home early and relax with a long movie, she didn’t even think about getting into her pajamas when she fell on the couch after her shower. Looking at the dark screen, with that annoying feeling that it wasn’t even worth choosing a good movie while waiting for the storm.

Which would explain why she wasn’t that startled when an unexpected but determined knocking resonated on her door. If she didn’t know better, she would have said it strangely sounded like Erza’s traditional knocking, as the redhead hardly ever could contain her excitement and banged on every door as soon as she gave a damn about whatever was inside.

But, not quite.

“Get out the heels, darling, we’re taking you drinking.” The brunette exclaimed as she opened the door to reveal the two mages standing on her porch, already dressed in what seemed to be their combat outfit. She even frowned at the sight of the brunette’s tight dress and high heels because she wasn’t the kind to get all dressed up so often, if not forced. Erza, however, even if she played coy, took advantage of every situation to get her outfits out. Probably even had fashion shows alone in her room.

Her guts never let her down.

“Wait, who’s taking who to where ?” She tried to smile nicely but the fierce looks they both harbored somehow awoke her battle spirit and she almost growled as the two women crossed, by force, her threshold to go straight to her room.

“We’re taking you out.” Erza added with that cocky smile of hers as the white-haired contemplated the occasion of kicking them both out with her claws. But they looked pretty determined, and even the demon knew she needed at least a strategy to take them both down on her own.

“Girls ?” She tried calling them out as they went up the stairs, and settled on her bed without so much as a ‘come on in’. “I don’t really feel like going out tonight.” But they only ignored her as they opened her closet and started going through her one too many dresses, in hope for a less poofy one than usual. And she actually had restrain her hand from resolving into a useless fight. “I’m kind of tired.”

“Too late, this dress says she wants to go with us.” Cana only replied as she mischievously threw the tissue on her bed. “And get the laced boots with it also.” She added as they closed the door behind her to let the demon mage change. “That if you can still get into those, of course.”

Maybe sometimes violence really was the answer.

The bar they had chosen was a nightmare. Honestly. Couldn’t they have gotten one with a little more people on the street ? Because she definitely felt like she hadn’t got her fair share of stares as they walked down the block. At least their table was a little bit isolated from the rest. There was that. It was most likely the VIP one though, because from the angle she could get at the main room, it was pretty full. It probably wasn’t every day it hosted three of the most popular female members of the guild, as the Grand Magic Games had each granted them with their part of fame.

She did get a lot of glares though, from people crossing their room. Sometimes mesmerized faces, sometimes just hints of recognition. They were not all directly for her but for some reason she seemed to be the only one annoyed, as the two other women went on pretty casually with their conversation, something about jobs, or cocktails. She hadn’t followed. And why did they have to keep that light so red, was it supposed to turn into a sex club after midnight or something ? Because she had boundaries. Mostly decided by the limits of mutually agreed monogamy.

“So, what is this about ?” She finally cut straight to her point, interrupting the other two that took on to staring at her like she was bursting into flames. So innocent of them.

“What do you mean ?” Erza frowned, with her innocuous face that just made her blood boil.

“Surely, you two didn’t kidnap and bind me in this dress just to talk about how great tequila sunrises are.” She was bitterly sarcastic, but they deserved it. Although, they didn’t seem that impressed. “Seriously, couldn’t you have chosen a tighter one ?”

She barked that one at her, but Cana only laughed.

“If you didn’t want to wear it, then maybe you shouldn’t keep it so front row.” Erza smirked as she took another sip without looking away from the white-haired.

“I have to admit, I’m not a fan of those.” Cana sighed as she finished her glass like it was a milkshake. Were they trying to annoy her ?

“Maybe they’re a bit too sugary for you.” Erza only replied, now ignoring the demon mage’s death stare. “We should get some beer next.” Yes, definitely.

“Yeah, I want a drink that actually does something to my tongue.” The brunette exclaimed as she lifted up her hand to try and hail the server. “Not some fruity shit that just slides on it.”

“Maybe we should get you a guy if you want things done to your tongue.” Mira only snapped sarcastically as she finished her glass and ordered a beer to the now-here waiter that left right after. Tight after coughing a dozen times at her last remark. Poor him.

She thought this one was going to slide right back on like a sugary cocktail, as the two women had been ignoring her ironic comebacks for forty minutes already, but they only stared at her. Cana had her smirky laugh, clearly appreciating the thought, and Erza her offended one, that she really wished she could just punch out of her, like she hadn’t been the one being snarky at her this whole night.

“Can’t we just enjoy a nice drink in your company.” Cana tried to break the tension with her smile, but it didn’t do much for the white-haired frown, still very suspicious of their intentions. She could just feel them exhaling out of these two. “It has been a long time.”

“Pretty sure I’m always there when you enjoy your drink.”

This one shook another laugh out of her as the redhead finally looked away with an amused grin. She was pretty drunk already.

“Yeah, but not like that.” The brunette whispered, but the white-haired still heard so it must have been louder, otherwise she wouldn’t have caught it over the general music of the bar.

“We’re not here to interrogate you. If that’s why you’re worried about.” The knight mage finally made the eyes at her. Like she was the crazy one. Especially with that smirky smile of hers. “But, if there is something you’d like to share…”

“Yeah, about maybe…” Cana really thought her way out to formulating this one, almost two full seconds. “…a special someone.” She winked with that one, and Mira wanted to vomit. It was ironic because she usually was the one to wink at people to get the secrets out of them.

Maybe it was karma.

“I’m not telling anything about my relationship with Laxus.” She tried to cut them there.

“Oh, come on !” Cana exclaimed, only confirming her suspicions that it was indeed the reason why they had brought her here. “I deserve it.” She took a sip, trying to calm her laugh. “Besides, Erza already knows all the dirty details, it’s not fair.”

She had that weird puppy looking glare, like she thought she could guilt-trip the white-haired with her fake cuteness and a few cocktails. And it wasn’t working. Never. At least not without a few more drinks.

“No, she does not.” “No, I do not.”

And then they were back, the twin sisters of the apocalypse. Only ever in sink when it came to deny the terrifying truth. They were friends. The brunette laughed again at their all too offended stares, and maybe because she felt her stomach turn around a bit for being death-stared like that.

“Oh, please…” But she wasn’t one to shy away from the battle, even against the scariest monsters the guild held. She would die a hero, or she would die not. “Everyone knows she’s the oathkeeper for all the juicy stuff.”

“Maybe about the general story, but I don’t get anything juicy.” The redhead only finished her glass, cheeks getting red and gaze getting a little too lost.

“Why not ? That’s what girls’ night is for.” The brunette exclaimed again, completely ignoring the general volume of her voice, as they were getting stares from all around the room. “Besides, he probably tells everything to his friends, so you’re fine.”

“I don’t think he does”. Mira frowned but getting more grinny as the alcohol seemed to do his job on her blood and brain.

“You don’t think Freed and Bickslow already know everything about your ass ?” Cana almost burst out laughing but Mira only kept gazing at her.

“Laxus’ a pretty private person. Plus, I don’t think men go that much into detail.” She tried to explain but regretted as soon as she saw their glare jump on her when she dared use his name. “Besides, I wouldn’t want him to do so, especially since Bickslow’s kind of dating my sister, if you remember well.” She paused then, pretty determined the card mage was had. “So, I’m not going to be one to start.”

She wished the pause that followed went on longer.

“Whatever.” The card mage grinned but didn’t succeed to hide her disappointed glare. “It’s not like you could shock me since I’ve already kind of seen things.” She smirked so mischievously, it was definitely karma. “If you remember well.”

“Oh please !” It was the demon mage’s turn to exclaim. If only she could make herself shut the hell up. “It’s not like you’re the only one that’s ever caught us.” She smirked too. She wanted to shove her hands on her own mouth but kept talking for some reason. “You really need to stop bringing this up.”

She knew she had made a drastic mistake when it was Erza’s turn to stare at her in bewilderment.

“Wait, what ? Who else has seen you two… ?” She asked right away as the brunette drank but stared all the same.

She withered. She knew she had taken it too far. Or maybe it had been Cana’s plan all along, to trick and play with her ego to get her to spill something. God, she was stupid. She should have punched them both when they showed up on her doorstep. Surely, the infirmary or anywhere else was better than here.

“Well…” She tried to close her eyes, but when she opened them, they were still there. “…you know…” God, her neck was so sore, she spent way too much time in a bad posture at work. “…my brother kind of did, that one time…”

“Wait, what… Elfman ?” They were almost in unison now, glaring so hard on her with their stupid confounded eyes. God, she wished she could forget that story. She didn’t even like remembering it. Let alone telling it to someone else.

“Well…” She tried to start but she was definitely getting creeped out by their way too concerned faces. “…if you promise not to say anything to anyone…” She should have gotten them matching sweaters to go along with the matching nod. “Once. Back when he didn’t know about… you know.”

Yes, they knew.

“Well, he was supposed to be on a job for like, two more days…and Lisanna was working, so…” She knew she was stuttering, but the tequila was making it harder and harder to formulate the words. “…we kind of decided to take advantage of the house.” God, she was blushing so hard.

“Please tell me he didn’t catch you both doing on the kitchen counter.” It was Cana’s turn to be horrified. How the tables turned.

“No.” She wanted to scream but remembered just in time they were still in public. “He was a bit too late for that.” She tried to make this one very low but from the laugh she got, obviously not enough.

“Point is…” She tried to concentrate herself for that one. “… We were in my room, but he kind of thought that I was hurt or something…” If only she could die right now, if only the amount of blood in her head could actually kill her from the mortifying. “…and kind of slammed his head on the doorway when he saw I was not.”

She wanted to die for the whole very long time they laughed. Of embarrassment, of shame. Not only of what she had said, but of the fact that she had actually shared that one with someone. It should have died without anyone knowing.

“Oh my god.” Cana had to swipe the tears from the² laugh. “Did he try to fight him or something ?” God, had she hoped for a joke.

“Yeah…” She sighed, still red as a poppy, trying to sip desperately on her desperately empty cocktail. “…after the initial shock.”

They laughed again. And okay, maybe it was a little funny. She grinned too.

“And ?” Erza inquired again. Still not letting this go “What happened ?”

“He got a black eye.”

Her jaw started to hurt after the minute that followed.

“Wait, I thought that was when Evergreen had punched him.”

“Yeah… that’s what they told people.”

How stupid did they have to be ?

Honestly, he wondered. There were some days he even wished he was tall enough to smack them both across the face with his wheelchair, just to get their brains both back into places. If only nature hadn’t been so cruel towards him.

Mavis, he couldn’t believe it.

And the nerve they had. Unbelievable. To just pretend like nothing was happening, right under his nose. To smile and chat like everything was fine, without a thought to what he might be feeling or wondering. To vanish one after the other, not at the same time, oh no, Mavis forbid they even let the slimiest clue that they were actually going back together.

Un-fucking-believable. And he didn’t like to swear. Not when he hadn’t drunk. He shook the habit out after years of hanging in the guild with a thousand children running around.

Not that he wanted to catch it again, even with them all grown.

If only they could stop acting like children.

Those two stupid brats.

And he loved them. To the death. Didn’t even need to explain why. Not when it came to him, but to the girl… Oh, how he grew to love her. Like his own, even if she was one of the only ones to actually remember who was originally supposed to love her this way. And it wasn’t just blind fatherly love, since he spent most of his days in her company, trying to get some work done, or mostly watching her getting the job done.

Watching her grow up, and loving what she was becoming. How beautiful and kind, and caring, and just the right amount of witty. Sometimes, he even wondered if she couldn’t be some angel sent from the sky to save him from his old days. Not that he wasn’t encouraging her to enjoy life as much as she could, even if it meant doing anything, or anyone for that matter. As long as it meant making her happy, and finally taking the life she deserved from the fate that took so much from her.

He just wished she hadn’t taken it so literally.

Because him. Well, he certainly wasn’t going to make her happy.

And it wasn’t as mean as it sounded. Because he loved him and also wished him the best joys of life just as much, if not even more. They just weren’t right for each other.

Too much baggage.

They were too different. Or not enough. He couldn’t tell. But, he certainly could tell how it was going to end. Horribly. Like some cheap heartbreaking show. Actually, there were several ways it could end, since they were both honestly damaged. Not for the rest of their lives. But for now, and until they actually managed to break through a few relationships, to have time to contemplate what their hearts lacked and were able to give.

If only they weren’t so stubborn as to skip all the trials to get to the one that could maybe harm the guild. And he didn’t want that. Not after everything. He didn’t want to die seeing them both tearing each other apart and his life work with them. It was just too much. Too much for his old heart to bear.

The only thing he didn’t know was who was going to bolt first.

It could be both really.

He was just so insecure, so hurt. And with reason. The old man had done his best, taking him in, raising him to the best of his ability, but no grandfather could make up for a shitty emotionally abusive father and a run-away mother. It was actually a miracle the boy wasn’t that messed up. He had character, that you couldn’t take from him. Most men would have wrecked the world and become a drug addict, or a warlord for that matter.

But he was damaged. Didn’t trust anyone. Not even him. Especially not him. But that was mostly his own doing rather than his father’s. Barely even opened up to his own carefully chosen friends, that would never dare break his trust. Sometimes he even thought he chose them to make up for his lack of parental validation, to have people chanting his praises to make up for the years of demeaning.

He was going to crush her. The girl needed steadiness and somebody to confide in and trust with her own life. She was a romantic. Not a goofy one though. She believed in die-hard love and life-long promises, in burning desire and intimate support. He knew it. She wouldn’t say it, but he knew it. Because he knew her, knew how much she had struggled with loneliness and suffering, even with her siblings at her side.

He was going to run. He was going to get terrified of having to trust somebody else, and he was going to crush her heart into tiny little pieces when she would open up and try for it.

And for that, he wanted to kill him.

Or maybe, he was going to be the one to open up. No reason. Actually, she was just as fucked up as him. She could very well be thinking they were just having fun, and unintentionally mislead him with her emotional talk and kindness. It was difficult not to feel close to her. She had a talent for that. People loved talking to her at the bar because she drew them in with her smile and warmth. It was only when you went to bed that you realized she never even said a word about herself.

He was going to fall for it. Way slowlier than the others, but she was going to do exactly what she did all day, except this time in his arms, and he was going to fall for it and blurt his heart out to her to get the affection he was yearning for. And she was going to crush it, ruin every little effort he ever made to let other people know how truly kind and loving he was, just to step on it and take him years back without even realizing it.

And he wanted to cry at the thought.

There was no way this was going to end well. His best chance was to hope they would both keep their bullshit until the end, and go for a quick and clean break. But how could the best scenario be not to grow at all ?

Because the odds of them getting both of their messes together on the first try was just too unlikely.

And the audacity to try when it was doomed. Well, it angered him so much.

It didn’t help that they both acted like children sneaking out to eat candy in secret, or thieves getting ready for the heist of the century. They didn’t even look at each other most days, let alone exchange a few words that weren’t directly related to jobs, or drinks, or the weather, but that was them trying. He knew because he had watched, carefully, weeks after finding out about the deed.

He had heard the rumors before, of course. But nothing quite compared to seeing it on his own. He hadn’t believed them, didn’t want to believe them. There were a thousand rumors going around the guildhall every day, especially about eminent members, and he was too old to pay attention to drunken chitchat, particularly when the two concerned barely managed to talk to each other for five minutes.

It was ridiculous.

He had found out during their trip to Crocus, to celebrate Lucy’s award and drink the night away. He was old but he wouldn’t have missed it for the world. He was too proud of her.

Of course, he thought it was weird when he saw his twenty-five year old grandson leaving the party before midnight, only half an hour after he himself considered calling it a night. But the boy had never been a social butterfly, even seeing him not hating the whole gathering already felt like a win.

He hadn’t thought much about it when he saw that they were sitting next to each other the whole time. After all, they both belonged to groups that seemed pretty determined to mingle, so it wasn’t that out of the blue. Maybe he noticed it, wished they wouldn’t return to their old ways and wreck the place over what color the tablecloth was supposed to be. He prayed for that one.

Didn’t even connect the dots when Mira got up, just fifteen minutes later. Right on the clock, he had to give it to her now, the timing was perfect. She went to congratulate Lucy, and then had the nerve to come up to his table and ask him if he needed help getting back to his room. Like she wasn’t planning on skipping her own to see if Laxus’ wasn’t more comfortable.

He couldn’t believe it.

He felt betrayed.

He trusted that girl. Trusted her with all the comings and goings of the guild, the one thing he gave his life for. Trusted her with his thoughts, feelings, and doubts. Mavis, he didn’t even trust Erza that much. And she knew. She knew how much it meant to him, how he was the most treasured thing he had left on this earth.

And she went for it.

Didn’t even have the decency to tell him to his face.

Didn’t even have the nerve to face him right after he found them out.

He didn’t have the strength to face her either, to be honest.

She didn’t like when he drank, kept on rambling about how it was bad for his health and his heart, how smoking could keep him from seeing his children thrive and be happy, and did he want to miss that ? No. Certainly Not. But he was old, and it was pretty difficult to explain to her, how, despite her best efforts, he could very well be found dead in his bed tomorrow, for no other reason than that it was the time. So, he certainly wasn’t going to miss out on his last opportunity to enjoy a good whiskey or a cigar.

He was too old for that.

But, he didn’t want to hurt her. Not when she spent way too many nights making sure he was going to bed properly and taking care of his way too big of a house. Did he feel ashamed about sneaking out at five in the morning when sleep eluded him ? Certainly. Very much so.

Couldn’t quite shake the irony when they had both found each other uncovered and guilty as charged. Him on his way to join Guildarts and the last partiers, and get some hard-earned liquor, and her getting out, dissheveled and sleepy, from a room whose number he knew to be Laxus’.

Mavis, he didn’t have the nerve to call her on it when she stared at him. Pretty sure he never saw her as red or as flustered. She didn’t even try to articulate a word to him. Just stared, and he stared back at her, before walking past him without another glance. Just walked straight across him and down the corridor to her room. 

She was savage.

“I just caught Mirajane getting out of Laxus’ room'' Was the only thing he could articulate when he found an empty seat beside the fourty-seven year old mage.

He didn’t quite know how to take the warm laugh he had gotten.

“About fucking time.” The brown-haired said, trying to calm his laughter and finish his glass. He was drunk, anybody could have smelled the whiskey in his breath from a mile away.

The old man only smiled awkwardly, and finished his drink straight, to forget about the all too disturbing image.

They hadn’t talked about it. Not for weeks. The woman just pretended they had never seen each other. Even missed the opportunity to scold him about his drinking. Probably hoping he had been too tired (or, too drunk) to remember their encounter. But you didn’t spend fifty-three years running a tavern without developing a resistance to shake the gods. But he didn’t call her on it.

He observed her. Observed her manners. Looked for the slightest tell, the subtlest blush when the blond talked to her, the quickest touch between their fingers when they just stood too close. And they were good. Honestly, only someone in the know could catch it, but they weren’t invisible. He noticed the glance he’d send her before ordering a drink. He noticed the knowing smirk she had when she asked him about his job. Noticed the way he would drag time at the bar, before resigning and going up the stairs when someone else would require her attention.

And it killed him.

It killed him how they could just go along their day acting all innocent and probably laughed at him later, at all of them. About how everyone was so oblivious to it. Like it was their fault if they couldn’t assume a glance in public could mean many more things in private. He wanted to kill them. For playing with fire. For acting like spoiled entitled brats. For hiding things that they knew were bad.

He almost gagged on his drink the day he saw it. That day when she was just so drunk and he saw her grab his arm to rest on it. He even looked around to see if anyone else had seen it, but he was only met with bored eyes that didn’t have a clue about what just happened.

Maybe it wasn’t that important. Maybe everyone knew and he was the only one caring. Maybe he shouldn’t care about it and let them figure their own things out. Maybe it wasn’t that big of a deal.

But, it was to him. Maybe it was stupid and childish, but he was angry. He was angry at them for hiding such a thing from a person they were both close too. From the person that cared most about them, that knew them better than they knew themselves. Even if that person hadn’t been capable of guessing it for himself

Maybe he was mad at himself. Maybe he was sad he didn’t know them as much as he thought he did. Maybe he hated himself. For being so slow. For being so blind.

He wanted to confront her. He wanted to scold. Tell her how stupid she was being. Him too, but it was already so difficult getting time alone with him, he didn’t want to offer him an excuse to skip their rare meals together. He worked too hard for them.

But he never could. For the first two weeks because it was too awkward to bring up. For the weeks that followed because he wanted to see how much time they could go without addressing it. Maybe the boy wasn’t even aware about him knowing. Not if Mirajane had kept it from him.

But why would she ?

He almost choked on his beer the day he asked her out. Out of the blue. In front of everyone. He was pretty sure he heard the whole goddamn guild freeze when they heard. Pretty sure he heard a few ones falling from their chairs when she actually said yes. She tried to hide it of course, but she was red as a poppy, fidgeting as she tried to ignore the questions to go back to her everyday chores.

Maybe it was kind of cute.

“So, you and Laxus, right ?” He had finally asked just a few hours after that. Once they were alone in his office, trying to get through the pile of complaints hoping to touch the ceiling.

He could see her straighten a little, probably not expecting the direct question from him. After all, he kept silent for many weeks, so why now ?

“Right. ” She only responded, not lifting her eyes from the letter she was reading.

“Huh.” He thought about giving up. But no. He wanted an answer and a resistant twenty-one year old certainly wasn’t going to stop him.

She only gave him a glance then. But that was all he needed.

“And how long exactly has this been going on between the two of you ?”

“I don’t know what you’re talking about, master.” She hummed.

“Don’t play with me, child.” He wanted to scream but instead settled for firm. “I’m old, but I’m not that old.”

Still no glance, she was pretty motivated not to look at him, shrugged her shoulders and kept on working, pretending like the conversation wasn’t making her head burn.

So, he didn’t say anything next, only stared at her, very intensively, very much expecting a response. She kept on working as long as she could but there was just something about the master burning holes into her that became too difficult to bear.

She looked at him then, tried to take on her best teenage-like face about how unimportant it was, but he didn’t let her. He gave her the knowing eyebrows and she felt herself stiffen, feeling like a child whose parent remind that lying only makes the punishment worse.

She swallowed and turned back to the papers, trying to hide the disarray that spread through her core.

“A few months” She maybe articulated with another shrug.

“A few months ?” He sounded angrier.

“More or less.” She scribbled something on paper, probably a bill.

There were not many times when he wanted to unscrew her head from her body to see if she could be as unnerving, but that was definitely one of them.

“You mean you don’t know ?” He tried to control his tone, but he was fuming.

She sighed and lifted her deep blue eyes to uncomfortably stare at him, just for a second.

“I mean it doesn’t have to be that important”

“I see… ” He sighed trying to think of a mischievous remark to throw back but nothing came to mind. So he just drank his beer in silence.

A few months.

It was insane.

They didn’t talk about it again. Not for a long time.

“Why don’t you try minding your own business, for once ?” The blond also shot down every chance he took at warning him.

They both had that way of getting on edge every time he would try to put the subject back onto the table. Even if it was just to tell them that whatever was going on between them, he and the guild certainly didn’t want to hear anything about it.

So he ignored it. He waited. Waited for the day they would become ancient history and he could go back to normal with both of them.

He just hoped he’d still be alive by then.

“I don’t get what’s bothering you.” Bob said to him one day, when he was visiting on a business trip away. “You love that girl.” He put down his drink in exasperation. “If you were seventy years younger, you’d marry her yourself.” The Blue Pegasus master laughed.

Like that was a reason.

A few weeks later, he finally gave in. Just not to die stupid. Maybe he was never going to like it, but he could at least try to comprehend it.

Mirajane was just a little less inclined to answer his questions.

“What do you mean why ?” She only asked back when he went forth and tried to inquire. A bit aggressive, as always when it came to the thunder mage.

“I do not wish to fight, child.” He tried to diffuse the tension but she was already frowning to hell and becoming all agitated it took everything in him not to give up. “I am only curious.”

“I didn’t see you becoming that curious when Gajil and Levy got together.”

“Surely, you can see why that is different.”

“I can assure you, I don’t.”

There was a silence. A long one. One during which she shelved a few more papers before turning back to him to raise her eyebrows again. A bit insolent maybe. She had quite a spark, one that clashed with her usual demeanor, one that he didn’t see often. But he wasn’t going to let her have her way around him. He wasn’t that old. So he was just raised his much more impressive eyebrows back until she turned around back again.

“I really don’t get what you expect me to say.” She was tidying the desk, glancing at him from time to time while he only stared and finished his cigar, ignoring her judgmental look.

“You mean you can’t think of a single reason why you would want to date Laxus of all people ?”

He saw her smirk, but only for a split second.

“I can think of many reasons, master.” She sighed while gathering the glasses on her tray. “I’m just afraid they might be a bit too generic for what you’re looking for.”

“Generic ?”

“That’s the word, yes.” She smiled, then. Like she was having him.

He paused, blowing out smoke. But still staring at her, so she knew she wasn’t dismissed.

“I don’t know.” He sighed again, folding the paper of the day, just for countenance. “I’ve seen you turn down quite a few people from the guild over the years.”

“Well, maybe that’s because he’s not twice my age, nor divorced, or married for that matter.” She tried to giggle but his face looked just too serious for that, so she only grinned. “I like that in a man.”

Sometimes he wondered why he even bothered.

So, he tried seeing it for himself.

“Why don’t you stay for dinner instead ?” He invited her once as she was preparing to leave while Laxus sat on the couch in front of him, eyes widened and everything, as usual, when the boy (rarely) gave in to his passive aggressive invitations and came over to eat alone with him.

He saw her hesitate, he even caught the glance she threw at the blond, seeming like she was checking by him, as he wasn’t ready for any possible reason to avoid being left alone with his old man. “I really doubt he’s going to mind.” He tried adding.

“Well…” She stammered, taking her shoes back off and grabbing a glass to join them on the couch, ignoring the victory glance he had when he understood he finally managed to take them by surprise. “I guess I can spare an evening.”

He didn’t know what he expected, but he certainly was disappointed when they didn’t even try to exchange a few words through the whole night. Well, he was pretty sure they did in the kitchen, but never in front of him, let alone touch. No, not a finger, not a word to each other, only to him. He was less angry than amazed now. What kind of self-control could they possibly have ? 

He tried talking to her sister then. After all, the girl was as close to her eldest as anyone could be, so she had to know something, right ?

“I don’t know, master, they never really hang out with me either.” He was very disappointed with this one. “Not together, I mean.” The white-haired girl tried to smile, but the old man looked too concerned to be taken lightly. “They just don’t like having people around.”

He sighed.

“From the lack of witnesses, I’m beginning to doubt they even hang at all.” He smoked while the eighteen year old giggled with amusement. “You forgot one.” He pointed at the glass left on the table.

“Well, I rather think it's a good sign, you know.”

He was intrigued then, grinning slightly. “And why is that, child ?”

“I don’t know…” She finished piling the glasses up on her tray before smiling brightly at him. “The thing with my sister is that she never talks that much about the things she cares about.”

“That’s an interesting take.”

“Well, not to me at least.” She sighed too. “But from what I heard, she’s a lot more talkative with Erza these days.”

He frowned at the thought. “ Erza, why ?”

“I don’t know, maybe it’s the booze talking.” She giggled again. “Or maybe, it’s because she doesn’t talk under torture.”

He smiled at her as she exited the office. A bit more satisfied with her than with the others.

Erza, huh ?

Now, that was someone he could ask.

Or not.

From the red her head immediately got when he asked, he’d go for the latter.

“I really don’t… I really don’t know what you want me to say, master…” She stammered so hard, way redder that he’d ever seen her before.

“Don’t give me that, Erza.” He cut her, tried grinning to relax her. “From what I’ve heard, you know more than anyone in here.”

She got even more flustered. If that was even possible.

“Maybe…” She swallowed hard. “But, I’m not…” She whispered then. “I’m not really supposed to talk about it.”

He thought hard about making her. He certainly could. She would never hide something from him if he inquired, he knew that. He could order her to talk and she would shamefully confess the whole thing even if it meant betraying her friend. But he hesitated. After all, the guild peace and running greatly relied on the two women’s good understanding, and force a feud between the two just seemed too stupid for that idiotic a reason.

“I do not wish to make you uncomfortable, child, but I’m just looking for…”

“Please, don’t make me tell you, master.” She cut him though, still red as a tomato and looking down. “I really can’t have Mira hating me again.”

He nodded. Sometimes² there was no helping it.

He thought he had gotten to the end of his ressources by then. Maybe he was never going to comprehend it. Maybe he didn’t have to. Some things maybe weren’t made to be understood. They never fought like he used to think they would. They never talked for that matter. He could go on about his day without even having to think about it. He even had to check by the girl, once in a while, just to make sure this was still happening.

Some guild members even forgot and tried to ask the white-haired out, but strangely only when the blond was away. The Thunder Legion didn’t like it though. He himself didn’t like it. Just because he didn’t approve of something didn’t mean guildmates could act this way towards each other. It was a matter of respect.

He did like that Laxus came by more often though. Not too often, he didn’t like exaggerating. But he slowly stopped turning him down for whatever reason he had found that night. He was calmer too, a little bit more relaxed and smily, but that could be very well him taking his dreams for reality. He didn’t know if she had something to do with that.

Maybe.

Maybe not.

But he did see him smile that day. When the guild was dark and packed. When the chatter was so loud he had trouble understanding Cana next to him. He saw them. Up onto the balcony where they thought no one was paying attention. He had trouble at first, catching the hand on her waist, or the bright mischievous grin she had during what seemed to be a passionate and witty conversation.

It seemed like they didn’t catch the ruckus around them. Or maybe they were just too used to it to pay any attention. He wondered what could be so interesting that they wouldn’t even think about looking around. And maybe he felt a bit sad. Sad that he didn’t know what could possibly be the topic at hand. Maybe he almost felt his heart sink that he might never know.

He almost hissed though at the way he had to keep her way too close to him, and let his hands wander a little bit too much. He almost wanted to turn around at the way he dragged her closer to casually lean in and capture her lips. It was swift, or maybe it was longer. He hadn’t gotten a good look, even staring the whole time. Strangely, he couldn’t tell.

But he could tell they were smiling.

And for that, maybe.

Mira probably has an affectionate but troubled relationship with her oldest and only daughter giving that she reminds her a lot of herself and she tries to keep her from putting herself in the same dangerous situations, but knows that she can't forbid too much or she will become rebellious ans much more difficult to deal with. Although, they do get along very well and her daughter often confides in her, the girl probably hates people to compare them and tries to be as different as she can be (but doesn't really succeed).

With her oldest son, I think that Mira gets along very well and is actually one of the only ones the boy takes directly advice from (he probably takes them from his father too but hides it). He is generally very nice with her, although she has sometimes to deal with his outbursts but always finds a way to calm him (whether she has to reason or give him a wedgie).