I Am A Student

I am a student. I haven’t figured it all out yet. I began this journey excited and thrilled to be a small part of a worldwide mission to help others.

I am a student. I apologize to everyone for it, even though I shouldn’t.

I am a student. I am learning, I ask repetitive questions, I don’t always understand and sometimes I may look like I’m capable, and I’m not.

I am a student, I am sometimes frightened before I walk into a patient’s room. I am a little fearful to talk to families. I am fearful to speak up. I am just unsure.

I am a student. I am also human. I goof off, usually in the moments when everyone is looking. I am a student, I also have extraordinary goals. I study hard, forgo social invitations, neglect my loved ones, spend hours researching, and hours in tears of frustration.

I am a student. Sometimes I have absolutely no idea what i am doing, or why I chose this major.

I am a student. I will screw up, say things that will annoy you, ask questions that will frustrate you, do things that will irritate you.

I am a student. I am scared. I am hopeful. I want to be you, but I also want to be me.

I am a student. I am sometimes in your way. I am sometimes in my own way. I am a visual learner. I am a tactile learner. I have learned that standing against the wall or in a corner won’t save lives. I am a student, your student, your past, and I want to learn from you.

I am a student. I am grateful for feedback, I am thankful for the supportive people who remember their own beginnings.

I am a student. Guide me.

I Am A Nurse.

I am a nurse. I don’t apologize for that anymore.

I am a nurse. I chose this profession, I did not settle.

I am a nurse, I graduated an accredited college, it doesn’t matter which one. I am a nurse who supports others with their goals in education. I support everyone’s right to learn inside or outside of an institution.

I am a nurse. I passed the rigors of a licensing exam, and I am not defined by the 75 or 265 questions I answered.

I am a new nurse. I will be subjected to hazing, bullying, mockery - and I will endure it.

I am a nurse, I don’t always know the right thing to say, or do, but I will do my best in this moment to listen to what my patients need. I am a nurse who learns from my patients.

I am a nurse. I am no longer afraid to speak up. I am not afraid to ask for help when I’m not sure.

I am a nurse. I’ve learned that dying, and the art of letting go is a dance of immense pain, yet it can also lend immense beauty to the memory of life when a patient’s final moments are regarded with dignity.

I am a nurse, and I work hard. I still have extraordinary goals. But I am also human. I may goof off at the exact moment when a patient’s family is watching. I will probably good off when the nurse manager or supervisor walks by. I sometimes lose patience when I’m stressed, I sometimes wish people would just go away, and leave me be. I neglect loved ones when I’ve had a rough shift and retreat into silence. I spend hours reflecting, and sometimes wishing a trapdoor would open up rather than face another day at work.

I am a nurse. I sometimes will make the most extraordinary mistakes, I am a nurse who gains wisdom and mindfulness from each error. I am a nurse who has learned to admit the error, take responsibility and accountability - without blaming the title or profession of nursing.

I am a nurse. I don’t attain to be perfect, but I attain to learn something each day, and I attain to take great care of my patients through their joys, and during their most difficult times. I attain to provide the kind of hope, comfort or support they need.

I am a nurse. Sometimes I still have no idea what I am doing.