beau ⋆˚꩜｡⋆˚˖

—

[[ personal info !! ]]

୨୧ my name is beau !

୨୧ he/him pronouns ! they/them works too, but i'm a man !

୨୧ i'm canadian, a taurus, and an intp ! just some fun extra things for ya :3 i'm also super into music, and i play multiple instruments, like the guitar and the clarinet !

[[ blog info !!]]

୨୧ this is a kpop blog ! i don't know the exact parameters of that yet, but i would like to start writing up some fanfic sometime in the near future, hehehe

୨୧ this won't strictly be for fanfic ! sometimes i might just be on here rambling about something or going feral — don't mind me, this could just be a way to get my thoughts out !

[[ writing info !! ]]

୨୧ just to get it out of the way, i'm gay ! this means if i do end up writing some fics, they'll probably be mostly (if not all) for boy groups, and probably mostly gn or male reader ! sorry if this doesn't float your boat, but this is just what i'm most comfortable with (i'll absolutely consider girl groups/fem reader too, though) !!

୨୧ all in all, though, i'll write almost anything you want ! there are some things i definitely will not write, though (enter great segue)

what i won't write !

୨୧ idolxidol (idolxreaderxidol is okay)

୨୧ anything/anyone underage

୨୧ noncon (dubcon depends on the circumstances)

୨୧ incest/stepcest/selfcest

୨୧ bestiality

୨୧ certain kinks (i'm mostly thinking of like... certain bodily fluids, but there could be other things, no shade but some of you have odd kinks)

୨୧ honestly, if you're unsure of something, just ask ! but these are currently my hard limits, so please respect that !

୨୧ while we're here, let's spin the positive and i'll tell ya what i will write !

groups i'll write for !

୨୧ NCT

୨୧ P1harmony

୨୧ Xdinary Heroes

୨୧ TXT

୨୧ ENHYPEN

୨୧ ATEEZ

୨୧ &Team

୨୧ Ampers&One

୨୧ XLOV

୨୧ LNGSHOT

୨୧ SHINee

୨୧ These are just the groups I'm most comfortable with. If you have a suggestion for another group, don't hesitate to ask ! It just might not be my best writing :)

୨୧ Again, keep in mind that if there are any minors in any groups I'm writing for, there will be absolutely no suggestive or NSFW content surrounding them at all.

[[ extras !! ]]

୨୧ any opinion, rant, or ramble will can be found under the personal tag beau's bubbles 🫧 (as in thought bubbles !)

୨୧ any fic or more longform content can be found under the personal tag beau's books 📖 !

thanks for taking the time to read, hope you can find some sort of joy here !! see ya :D

—

Five years.

Half of the lifespan of NCT, and pretty much your entire career, you'd been a stylist. You'd gone to school for fashion design, and the portfolio that you accumulated over those four years seemed to wow some of the higher-ups at SM enough that you got the job.

You honestly didn't expect it to last long; jobs like these usually came and went. If they could hire someone with a little bit less experience that they could pinch their pennies on, another round of layoffs were imminent. But SM always kept you. Maybe it's because you actually knew what you were doing, could keep up with the more masculine-leaning fashion trends far easier as a man in the industry. Maybe it's because you were one of the few stylists that some of the idols actually liked. Either way, you had to be doing something right, no?

You'd worked with plenty of groups under SM. Name one, and you've likely had a cute interaction with at least one of the members. SM is good at keeping their staff on short leashes, though, so most of the time, you ended up being around NCT, and 127 were your muses more often than not. This wasn't always helped by the fact that you were a master at making 'ugly' articles beautiful. A new hem here, removal of a logo there, even chopping them up and Frankenstein-ing them back together with other pieces, you always knew exactly what you were going to do before you even sketched it out. It was admirable. More than once, Yuta had complimented your ability to make a frumpy shirt look straight out of a classic runway show. Johnny always seemed to like the shoes you picked out. Doyoung even came and personally said goodbye to you before he left for his military service. You were a household name at this point, and most of the idols under SM knew exactly who you were.

Jaehyun probably liked you most of all, though.

He hit it off with you pretty much the moment that you became stuck with 127; always chatty, always smiley. At first, it was under the guise of making sure he kept his English intact, because the other English-speaking members were no help, according to him. The more you got to know him, though, and the more that you styled him, the more you realized that he just liked to talk to you. By the time he was out to do his service, your conversations were no longer career-based, but rather mundane things. "How's your mother? You were saying a few days ago that she was sick" He'd start a conversation. You would respond as you adjusted sleeves and accessories. "I noticed you were rubbing you eyes earlier, have you been getting enough sleep? Do you have a headache?" As much as you thought it was sweet, how often he rattled on, doted over you, and wanted to know about your life, it was a lot for someone who was supposed to be more of a coworker than anything. Still, you found yourself missing his over-the-top compliments and softer smiles while he was gone.

When he came back, he was more overjoyed to see you than you were to see him. He came strolling into your office like he owned the place with your favourite drink in hand. He gave you a big, tight hug, commenting that he was bored throughout the year and a half without his favourite person to talk to. You gladly allowed him into your second home, letting him in on your top-secret sketches and plans for new outfit combinations with what the company already had in their current wardrobe rotation. The casual nature of you letting him keep you company was like a rumpled fabric in Jaehyun's soul that you'd seemed to iron out with ease. From there, something changed.

He was constantly bringing you little gifts. A snack or drink, a keychain, even a book a time or two, it was like he was trying to impress you with simple things that he knew you enjoyed. To be fair to him, it was working. You got even closer to him, developing a little crush, but keeping things as professional as possible. You didn't want to be that guy, after all. Plus, at least in looks, you nearly felt sub-human compared to Jaehyun. He was absolutely stunning, and while you didn't find yourself ugly by any means, you definitely weren't at Jaehyun's level. You obviously had no idea, but he believed you to be the most stunning person he'd ever laid eyes on. Every time he looked at you, it was though he was looking at an angel that he wished he could whisk away and keep all to himself. He knew he couldn't, of course, but that didn't stop him from trying.

Jaehyun began to get a tiny bit more possessive. It was nothing scary; it could easily be brushed off, and you didn't want to be touched, his hands never even came near you. But, if you were okay with it, he was constantly hugging you, holding your hand, brushing your hair from your face. He knew things like that made you blush, but how could he not be a little bit cockier when he had at least four other men to compete with? It was a no brainer to him. He kept flirting with you, getting touchier, while you tried to remind yourself that Jaehyun was just a friendly guy... even when your roommate told you that he sounded nearly obsessed with you.

You didn't have time to think about it, though. There were albums coming up. Promotions to be run. And you needed about five different outfits for each of them. You were a little swamped, and just when you thought you were finally going to get a day to yourself, you were called in. They were paying you nearly double time for this, you couldn't really say no.

You needed some new measurements for Jaehyun, but when you opened the door, he was already half naked. You thought you were interrupting, muttering a quick apology and moving to close the door, but you were easily pulled back inside of the dressing room by Jaehyun, who was a lot stronger than you remembered.

"Hey, what's going on—" You began, but he hushed you ever so softly, gently pressing a finger to your lips.

"It's still early, so not a lot of people are here yet... but I don't want to risk anything." Jaehyun whispered, already looking at you with a reverent kind of hunger.

"...What the hell are you talking about?" You mumbled back in the same tone, suddenly worried. You hadn't realized yet that Jaehyun was holding you tighter than ever, pressing you up against his built frame.

"Are you that oblivious?" He chuckled, pulling back a bit the moment he felt you shift a bit uncomfortably. "Have you not noticed that I've been practically drooling over you since before I even left?"

You nearly short-circuited. He chuckled when he saw you blush again, shaking your head and turning away.

"What, do you think I'm too good for you?" He smiled, though his eyes seemed a bit sad at the notion that you were so hard on yourself. "C'mon," he whispered your name. "I'm crazy about you."

"I think you're just crazy." You managed to sputter out, not wanting to give away that you were losing your mind at the sheer thought of being so close to him. God, his abs...

"Are you sure?" He smiled a bit wider. "I think you're trying to deflect the fact that you're hard right now."

So that's what that sudden rush of heat had been. You swallowed, finally looking him in the eye. "I think you're a bit too observant sometimes." You choked out, your throat now completely dry.

Jaehyun laughed softly. "You're so cute..." He finally pulled back fully, though your arms were still captured in his. "Don't you like what you see?" He showed off a bit, parading his muscles like a fanning peacock. You couldn't help but let out a giggle of your own.

"Of course I do." You admitted, letting your arms wrap around him, pressing yourself forward with more purpose this time. "I'm just surprise you like what you see."

Jaehyun scoffed, backing the both of you up to a nearby couch. "Why wouldn't I? You're the most handsome man I've ever seen." He smiled impossibly brighter when your blush deepened.

Your lips were connected by the time you both sat down. He slid his arms around your waist, pulling you into his lap as you continued to kiss him like he was your source of air. He only pulled back when he was desperate, just to take one or two shallow breaths and lean right back in. His hands roamed carefully, yet diligently, creeping up your shirt slowly as if he was waiting for you to bat him away.

"Take it off," You whispered against his lips. "Just take my shirt off."

That was all the confirmation that Jaehyun needed. He leaned back just far enough to slip your shirt from your body, immediately attaching himself to your neck the moment that he was able to, tossing the fabric to the side and closing the minimal space that had been put between you.

"You're so beautiful," He nearly moaned, voice still muffled against the crook of your neck. "Can't believe I waited so long..."

You brushed Jaehyun's hair back, gently playing with it while he lavished attention to your otherwise clear skin. This went on for a while, which caused you to yelp softly when he flipped the two of you over, hovering above you while your chest rose and fell with each heaving breath. Still, you playfully grabbed his waist, pulling him closer until he pulled in a sharp breath at your hips meeting his.

"Well don't get shy now," You teased. He laughed breathlessly, finding the crook of your neck and letting his hips roll forward. This became your next dance for a while, more articles of clothing being carelessly discarded while Jaehyun nearly lost himself in the feeling of pressing against you alone.

"C'mon, Jaehyun," You whined, a mixture of impatience and pleasure. "We don't have enough time. If you want to fuck me, you have to do it now." You added in a softer voice. He just nodded, ready to bend to your every whim even if he was supposed to be the dominant one.

It seemed like in an instant, you were both finally fully nude, and god, if Jaehyun looked like a statue before...

"Happy?" He muttered joyfully, chuckling as you hummed without taking your eyes off of his chest, his abs, his...

Without thinking, you wrapped your hand around his cock. He was already hard, unsurprisingly; you were too. Still, he let out a soft sound as he leaned forward, capturing your lips again while you jerked him off without a second thought. It was primal, visceral even, and neither of you could seem to get enough. As his head moved back down to your neck, your hand picked up speed, your thumb finding and remembering his most sensitive spots as it brushed over them again and again.

"Fuck, wait—" He said after a few minutes, gently grasping at your wrist, but not daring to pull your hand away. "I'm gonna cum, stop..." He huffed against your skin.

"Isn't that what you want?" You asked outright.

Jaehyun hummed. "Want to make you cum..." He whispered. "Can I, please? I have a condom, please, I really want you..."

You weren't even going to say no anyways; but with a face like that, handsome and strong but still so desperate, how could you even think about such a thing?

"Hurry up, then, you're leaving me hanging..." You teased, watching as he frantically pulled back just enough to find his pants and pull a condom from his pocket. He ripped it open and slipped it on, immediately grabbing your legs and holding them against his chest before unceremoniously rolling forward again, causing a simultaneous relieved sigh from the both of you.

Jaehyun was having some trouble holding back. His thrusts were fast and hard from the beginning, causing gasps and moans from you each time. He seemed a bit nervous that he was being too rough with you, but each time, you held his shoulder or the back of his neck, your thumb rubbing against his skin just so that it reassured him to keep going, that it felt good.

"Shit, 'm not gonna last long..." He muttered, realizing he was a bit sensitive from your handjob just a few minutes prior.

"It's okay," You sighed. "Just keep going, Jaehyun, you feel so good..." Jaehyun eventually started jerking you off to aid you, not quite confident enough that he was going to last long enough to make you cum. Your louder moans signalled that it was a good decision, because his thrusts started to get sloppier less than a minute later.

He moaned out your name as he came hard, still tugging you in his hand as you trailed close behind, reaching your own peak before his was even fully over.

He pulled out with a shudder, letting himself be a bit vulnerable as he buried himself back into the crook of your neck once more, this time softer. Quieter.

You let yourself relax for a moment, too, suddenly forgetting about all of the measurements that needed to be taken, all of the alterations necessary, all of the work that needed to be done.

"Before you left?" You inquired suddenly, remembering what he said when you walked in on him.

Jaehyun responded quietly after a moment. "I always thought you were cute. But some months before I left, I realized that I really, really liked you. You treated me like I was real. And you talked to me so casually. It felt so nice."

You hummed, pulling him just a tiny bit closer.

"Can we do this again sometime?" He muttered, his voice now much different from the smooth, sultry one he'd had on earlier.

"Of course," You responded with a soft giggle. "But let's find a time where we aren't rushed, yeah?" You added while you played with the hair at the nape of his neck.

"As long as I don't have to pretend to be normal while you take measurements after, anytime is good to me." He whispered.

—

Would it be too cliche to say 'it was a weekend like any other'? It truly was, at least for you.

You were splayed out across your bed, already twiddling a lighter in your hand. You were just listening to some music, fidgeting slightly while you waited for the knock on your door. He didn't even need to text you nowadays.

Weekends had become a sacred ritual, now. You were at his dorm last weekend, so now, he's be coming over to your apartment. You always seemed to have new paraphernalia when you showed up; he always provided snacks.

Kyrell didn't smoke often. He'd still call himself a stoner, sure, but it was mostly just weekends, after his shorter practices when he had time to wind down and relax. You were the one that introduced it to him, too — he kept staring at the pen you had one day while you were hanging out — so he always wanted to be with you, just in case.

Like clockwork, he showed up, carrying a bag of chips and that bright smile he always seemed to have. "Hi" he said casually, somehow still all bubbly after what he described to you as one of the most stressful weeks of his life.

"Hello," You stepped to the side, letting him in. "What kind did you get?" You asked, snatching the bag from him. "Just plain? Boring..." You laughed and led him towards your bedroom, where you grabbed a joint for the both of you.

After your little ritual became more set in stone, you realized that Kyrell was a bit of a lightweight. He was still building a tolerance, so after a few drags, he already had himself propped on your windowsill, head hanging a bit as the feeling of being high settled in his body. When you asked if he was okay, he just hummed, nodding softly. You took a few more hits yourself before letting the joint rest on the side of your ashtray.

It didn't take long for him to start clinging to you. He'd been so cuddly the last few times... he already liked being touchy with you in the first place, and it nearly quintupled while he was high. He sat in bed with you as you put some quieter music on, his arms wrapped around your shoulders as he suggested a few tracks to add to your playlist.

He was cute, sure, but damn, he was so restless. He wasn't normally like this, either, but he just kept squirming, whining like a puppy with each movement he made.

"What the hell are you doing down there?" You chuckled, not looking away from your phone. He didn't answer, so you finally looked down.

He was half-hiding his face in your leg, redder than a tomato and shaking his head every so slightly. "Sorry..." He muttered.

"Don't be sorry." You giggled. "What's wrong?"

"Just a little overwhelmed, maybe." His voice sounded strained and he still wasn't looking at you. You wondered for a moment if he was maybe a bit too high.

"Ky..." You cooed. "Tell me what's wrong." Your voice was steady, but you were still scolding him. He only whined louder.

Finally, after a bit more coaxing, he whispered as if you would kill him for voicing his distress. "I'm really horny." He held onto you tighter while you held back laughter.

"Don't laugh," He pouted as you coughed softly, trying to mask it.

"I'm sorry, Ky, I'm sorry, it's just a little bit funny." You petted his hair softly. He wasn't usually this open, even while high. "I'm not making fun of you, I just didn't expect it." You added in a softer voice. "It's okay."

After another small stretch of silence, Kyrell summoned the courage to just ask you outright;

"Can you help me?" His voice was nearly nonexistent, his face still pressed against your leg in embarrassment.

You paused for a moment, weighing your options. Not only was Kyrell your best friend, but you were both also a little bit inebriated. You took a deep breath and sighed softly.

"Are you sure?" You asked.

He nodded furiously. "Please, I feel like I'm gonna catch on fire."

With another sigh, you stroked his hair. "Okay. C'mon, Ky, sit up, I'll help you." Kyrell scrambled up, trying to seem as sober as possible, but secretly elate that not only was he going to feel you, but he was going to do it while he was happily fuzzy and hypersensitive. You chuckled at his eagerness. It wouldn't hurt, would it? You were close, you would both be able to get over it, right?

"I don't want to hurt you... I want to make you happy." Kyrell muttered. "I won't hurt you, right? Not like... emotionally, or anything?" You could tell he also had his reservations, but they were more about you than himself. You smiled at how selfless he was.

"You're not gonna hurt me." You reassured him as he slid forward. His lips connected with yours while his hands trailed up the back of your shirt. You returned the kiss, trying to match how hungry he seemed to be.

"I never thought I'd get to do this. I've been in love with you since I met you." He hummed when he pulled back, tugging you shirt off and hugging you, forceful enough that you landed back on the mattress with a small thud. "I never wanted to make you uncomfortable, I love being your friend too much..."

You gently rubbed Kyrell's back as his pressed softer kisses to your jaw. Sober thoughts...

"It's okay Ky. Just relax, I'm not uncomfortable. I want you too." It was true; you'd always been a bit closer with Kyrell, and everything felt so much better when you were high.

After a painstakingly long five minutes of Kyrell just getting handsy, you finally forced yourself to sit up for a minute or two. He paused, pulling back and watching your every moment with the biggest puppy-dog eyes you'd ever seen.

You grabbed the smoldering joint and took a final hit, crushing it out and grabbing Kyrell's jaw before parting his lips for him and blowing the smoke into his mouth. He whined loudly, his hips rutting forward on your thigh as he coughed out the residual smoke.

"Fuck," he breathed, rutting forward again, this time with a bit more purpose. "Let me suck you off, please please please let me suck you off, I wanna taste you so bad..." he begged, his hands already moving to undo the drawstring of your sweatpants before you even responded. When you nodded, he only moved faster, sliding off of your lap and down even further, his mouth waiting for you before he even had your pants to your knees.

When Kyrell did take you, though, it felt like heaven. He was a little sloppy, a little bit uncoordinated, but he swallowed you like he was going to die that night. He was even louder than you were, while you mumbled random curses under your breath and soft moans, he whimpered and moaned like it was breathing. He took you inch by inch until all you could do was grab his hair and force him to your hilt, to which he blinked up at you with those big, glassy, bloodshot eyes that never failed him.

This continued for a little bit, his head bobbing softly as he adjusted to your size, still moaning around you like a pornstar. Kyrell was too ahead of himself, though, and in his hazy mind, all he was thinking with was his dick.

"Wanna make you cum on me," He rasped when he pulled off of you. "Can't wait anymore, need you..." He added, undoing the button on his own pants while you lit up another joint, taking a long drag before offering it to him. He pushed your hand away, leaning in and opening his mouth before you even had to say anything. You smiled before letting out another puff of smoke that he happily took.

When you were both naked to his standard, Kyrell grabbed your thighs and pulled you toward him. You jolted softly in surprise, the joint still dangling from the side of your mouth as you laughed softly.

"Someone's eager." You giggled.

"Don't make fun of me..." Kyrell whined as he pushed forward, pressing himself against you. The feeling of your cock against his would've been enough to make him cum then and there, but he held back, wrapping a hand around both of you, which caused you to groan in unison. He couldn't keep still, his hips bucking over and over as you laughed at him.

"I can't— can't help it, please, it's too good..." He was nearly drooling over you, frantic and pleading. A soft fog began to settle over the small bedroom due to your continued smoking, even though by bow most of it was being blown directly down Kyrell's already abused throat.

When he adjusted to push into you, he grabbed your legs and pushed them together, wrapping his arms around the bend at your knees and tossing them up, resting your ankles on his shoulder. Wherever the hell the lube came from, it was slathered anywhere that Kyrell thought would be beneficial, causing better friction and heightened pleasure.

"Hey," You smiled, deciding to tease him. "What if I told you you're not allowed to fuck me yet?" You asked as you added the joint to the butt of the other already in the ashtray.

Kyrell's eyes went wide. "...Am I allowed?"

"What would you do if I said no?" You challenged. "Would you beg? Hm? would you hump my thighs like you're in heat?"

"Don't say that..." Kyrell blushed furiously, his hips pushing forward again on their own. His tip caught where your thighs met and he keened, bucking forward further. Maybe it was a good thing you said that, actually. He couldn't help himself, he was too foggy and every part of you was so soft, so perfect... he hugged your legs close and squeezed his eyes shut, fucking faster into your thighs. after a moment, he turned his head to bite your calf softly, trying to ground himself.

"If you're gonna cum so soon, Ky, hurry up and cum inside me." You managed, leaning your head back against the pillow. Really, you didn't care where he came. You were happy enough that he felt so good.

You weren't expecting him to abruptly move from your thighs to your hole, immediately fucking into to you the point where you were seeing stars. You barely had time to catch your breath, huffing out a breathy 'fuck!' as you adapted to the feeling.

Being so hyperaware because of the high, every brush felt like a punch, every stroke like the blade of a knife. Neither of you really cared, though, just a cacophony of begging and provoking and so many noises that you were going to hear shit from your neighbours about later. Not that you cared. This was so worth it.

"I'm gonna cum... gonna cum, please let me cum, fuck, I'll do anything, please—" Kyrell panted as his thrusts became faster and fell off rhythm.

"Nothing is stopping you. Do it, cum for me." You commanded. It nearly sounded like a dare, and that in and of itself made Kyrell tumble over the edge, let alone literally every other aspect of the situation.

"Ahh, fuck! Fuck, please," He asked again, even though it was far too late for that now. He held your legs tighter, resting his forehead against your shin, now twitchy and weak. He desperately tried to catch his breath.

"God, that was so good." His voice was tiny now, completely spent in this half-hour ordeal that felt like an absolute lifetime and a nanosecond simultaneously. "I didn't know anything could ever feel that good."

You chuckled. "Now you know."

If the music in the background hadn't stopped playing, you probably wouldn't have heard him. Still, Kyrell found the strength to mumbled against your leg.

"I'm hungry."

—

He was really interested in you.

Scratch that; he was practically obsessed with you.

It started out with something so innocuous, because it always started out like that. It was a borrowed pen in school, years ago now. Then you got to talking. You found the weird guy pretty charming. He would give you little doodles of the two of you in a cartoonish style, share his snacks with you, he even taught you a few little dances. All in all, Shota was a great guy, even if he had his quirks.

Though, lately, you'd been a bit confused by him. It's not that he seemed more shut off or distant; if anything, he seemed the opposite. Clinging to you as if you would leave if he ever let go, giving you more little gifts, it was just... odd. It confused you, and didn't know what to do about it.

Well, it wasn't long before it all came to a head.

He hadn't texted you that morning. It wasn't entirely out of the ordinary, but you had planned a hangout for the two of you, and you hoped he hadn't forgotten.

You let yourself into his apartment with the key that he gave you a while after he moved in, announcing your presence as you entered. When there was no response, you wondered if he wasn't home. You were about to pull out your phone and text him, but you suddenly heard some noises from the direction of his room. You had no idea what he was doing, so you got closer and closer, before your ear was practically pressed up against the door. And then you heard him loud and clear. He'd definitely forgotten. At least, he forgot the time that you would be over.

"Fuck, please..." You heard him moan through the door. To be completely fair to the guy, he had a nice voice. All of your thoughts drained from your mind, though, when you heard a name tear from his lips.

Your name.

He was masturbating, thinking about you while he was doing it. You were flattered, but pissed off, and you couldn't tell which emotion was winning.

So, without thinking, you opened the door, coming across a... depraved sight.

There was Shota, on his bed, wearing one of your favourite hoodies that you'd been searching for, humping a stuffed animal — that you won for him at the fair not that long ago, no less — like a bitch in heat. He was holding a pair of your underwear up to his face; your favourite pair, that you'd lost a while ago. He had his phone open, too; not to any sort of porno, but to a seemingly innocent picture of you. It looked like one taken at the aquarium, when it was boiling hot out and you were wearing a tank top to keep cool. The entire room reeked of your cologne, so much that it was making even your head spin. And worst of all, he didn't even know you had walked in on him. He'd just continued rocking his hips against the defenseless stuffie, moaning your name like a cheap whore.

You could tell he was getting close when he dropped the underwear, screwing his eyes shut tight and moaning even louder than before. You couldn't take it, at that point. You didn't even know how to feel; one of your closest friends, such a pervert, with his focuses on you of all people...

"What the fuck, Shota?" You suddenly said without thinking, much louder than you intended to. His head shot up and his eyes locked on you, but by that point, he was already cumming. He slapped a hand over his mouth and looked away in shame as his cock leaked pathetically onto the poor stuffed animal.

"Oh my god, fuck, I'm so s-sorry..." He immediately apologized, shaky and broken, muffled by his hand.

By the time he'd finished, you were closer to him, arms crossed, silently demanding an explanation. You were here now; might as well know.

"I'm sorry, I'm so sorry, please don't be mad... shit..." He tried his best to cover himself up with a nearby blanket, though it was far too late for that. Tears welled up in his eyes as he apologized profusely.

"Please," He whispered your name, "Please don't hate me, I'm sorry, you were never meant to know any of this... I'll stop, just please, don't leave me..." the tears finally slipped down his cheeks as he reached out and you stepped back. You just wanted answers, but he took it as you never wanting to even see him again. He practically bawled, desperately trying to apologize or explain himself or do something. You could only stand there; you wanted to comfort him, he was still your friend after all, but he was in such a state that if you did anything, you feared he would break down further.

He explained through harsh sobs that his fixation with you had gotten a bit out of control lately, and he had been trying to reel it back in. However, with some recent ideas you'd had about moving away or leaving for a while to explore the world, he spiralled, completely losing himself in his need for you. So he stole things he thought you wouldn't notice — a pair of your underwear, a hoodie of yours, and a small bottle of your cologne — and used it to try and quell his pathetic need to just have you. The way he was crying, you'd think you already walked out on him. Hell, you'd think somebody died, the way he was sobbing.

"Shota..." You eventually mumbled, almost feeling a bit guilty, now. You were a bit weirded out due to his obsession, yeah, but he was a bit of an odd guy anyway. You had gotten used to everything else, why couldn't you get used to this? So, you pressed one hand to his hoodie-clad shoulder and used your other hand to gently tilt his face up so you could wipe away his tears. "Don't cry... don't cry, Sho, it's okay..."

It seemed to be no use. He grabbed onto you and cried even harder into your shirt, begging you not to leave now that you giving him an ounce of care and compassion.

You moved to rub his back, trying to soothe him as you reached for the nearby tissue box, grabbing a few tissues and lifting his head back up so that you could wipe away his tears.

"I'm not gonna leave, Sho. I'm staying, I promise." You muttered comfortingly, even though the other seemed completely inconsolable, terrified that you were going to leave and never speak to him again.

"Shota." You finally said, your tone a bit more firm. "I just... I just want you to come and talk to me next time. Don't resort to something like this, it's... it's weird. And not in a good way."

"I'm sorry, I'm sorry... I'll never do it again, I'm sorry..." He continued to mutter senseless apologies, still clinging to you like a koala.

"Shh, I forgive you, it's alright. Just don't cry, okay? Don't cry..." You pressed a kiss to the top of his head and he whimpered, his sobs slowly turning into soft sniffles.

"You don't hate me?" He whispered, looking up at you with puffy eyes and red cheeks.

"No, Shota. I don't hate you. I still love you." You whispered. "And I'm... willing to explore with you, if you stop doing things like this. And if you give me back my underwear." You smiled softly at the end of your sentence, and he nodded.

"Let me, uhm... wash them, first." He mumbled, embarrassed. You chuckled, simply brushing his hair back and continuing, still trying to soothe him.

"You can keep the hoodie, though. It looks cute on you." He finally smiled at that, looking at you as if you'd hung the stars in the sky yourself.

Shota pushed the stuffie away and searched for his own underwear, trying to cover up the evidence or his perversion.

You sat next to him on his bed and brushed his hair back again, as it kept getting in his eyes.

"You know, I can help you, if you need me to." You shrugged, meaning it in more ways than one. He paused for a moment, not even looking at you, as he was still pretty embarrassed.

"...Can you help me right now?" He whispered nearly inaudibly,

"Do you... need help?" You responded, sliding your hand under the blanket and placing it onto his thigh. He shivered, moving closer to you.

"I just need you. I've needed you for a long time." He mumbled, finally peeking over at you as your hand slowly trailed up his thigh. You gently pulled the blanket back to reveal that his cock still stood, at attention and waiting for you. After a moment, you wordlessly spread his legs just enough to shift on his mattress so you could settle between them. When your hand finally made it to his cock, he moaned lowly, letting his legs fall open for you further. You smiled happily; he looked like he was on cloud nine, with you between his shaky legs. He let his head fall back just enough for you to see his adam's apple dip as he swallowed hard.

"Mmph... fuck..." he muttered, still a bit oversensitive from his prior orgasm. When you slowed down, trying to let him recuperate, he wrapped his hand over yours and urged you faster again. "I can take it. I can take anything, as long as it's you giving it to me." He whimpered.

"Talk to me, Sho. Tell me everything you want." You squeezed his cock in your grip ever so carefully, pulling another round of blissed out sounds from his lips.

"Fuck, please... anything. Anything and everything. Want to be inside of you, want you to be inside of me, want... ah- fuck..." He let his arms wrap around your neck, pulling you nice and close. "I want you to use me, I want whatever you want. I want to worship you, I want you to make me feel like a loyal little servant and you're the king. Please, just do whatever you want to me-" He gasped as your lips suddenly connected to one of his nipples, tugging gently at the bud with your teeth and flicking over it with your tongue.

"You are just a little pervert, aren't you, Sho?" You managed in between laps at his nipple.

"Y-yes, yes, I'm just a pervert, nothing more... hah... ah- for you, only you... just want you..." He babbled mindlessly, too entranced by the feeling of your tongue against his chest and your hand around his shaft.

"You want me inside you, little perv?" You teased, pulling back to instead pull at his nipples with your free hand.

"Yes!" He keened as you pinched down at a particularly sensitive point. "Yes, yes please, please, I need it, I need it so bad, I need you to stretch me out like I've never been stretched before— please!" He begged, trying to hold his own legs open so that you had access to him whenever you decided you wanted him. "I don't want prep, don't need it..." He shook his head, even though he knew it was a bad idea; he'd only ever taken a few of his own fingers before, nothing bigger, and he knew that the stretch would be ever so painful, but he didn't care.

So, you reached over to his bedside table, where you'd noticed that he had a bottle of lube. You grabbed it, pulling away to slip your pants off, to which he whined. You only chuckled, knowing what his reaction would be when he finally saw you in all your glory.

You were right, too, as after you took your pants off, Shota stole a glance at your cock, almost gulping. "Oh my god," he whispered, his hole already clenching around nothing. "You're gonna tear me apart..." He knew you were bigger than him, of course, but in this context, it was a much different story.

"You still want it, baby?" You checked again, and he nodded, beginning to beg for it. So, you lubed yourself up and pulled him closer, pressing against his clenching hole.

"Just relax, it'll feel good..." You whispered, rubbing your hands against his legs to soothe him as you slowly pushed in.

The first few inches, he was fine, only moaning softly, but as you got deeper and deeper with no sign of bottoming out, he began to whine and whimper, the feeling of your cock nestled so deep within him making him tear up.

"You're too big, it won't fit..." He whispered, and you paused.

"You want me to stop?" You whispered, holding one of his hands. He shook his head, taking a few deep breaths before speaking up again.

 "No, no... make it fit. Stretch me out. I don't care how much it hurts- I want it to hurt. Break me, please." He assured you, wrapping his arms around your neck again to keep you close.

"Just tell me if it hurts too much." You kissed his cheek and continued, slowly stretching him to the point where he was nearly in tears again by the time you bottomed out.

"Mmph— you're so deep..." He shuddered as he struggled to acclimate to your length.

You graciously helped him along, pressing kisses to his beet red cheeks, rubbing his legs and hips, and whispering soft praises to him, which he happily accepted, chasing your lips with his own after each muttered compliment.

When you finally took a moment to look down, you noticed that due to his thin, lean frame, a faint outline of your cock was visible at the base of his abdomen. It made you smile involuntarily, placing your hand over it before beginning to drag yourself in and out of him at the gentlest pace possible.

"Fuck!" He shouted your name, the feeling of him finally having you inside of him, the way you were just so big compared to what he was used to, it was all overwhelming him. "Please! It's so... so much...!" He whined, practically panting as he wrapped his arms around your neck for any sense of stability in the midst of the delicious pain.

"I've got you. Just hold onto me, baby. You can take it." You reassured him, and he just nodded. "I can take it..." He whispered, eyes still squeezed shut as he attempted to compose himself.

To Shota, it was a lot. Every time he seemed to adjust, you went just a little bit faster, a little bit harder, and he was back to seeing stars. God, how he loved it, though. Because it was you, and he didn't have to spray your cologne on that stuffed animal or look at a picture of you just to cum anymore. You were here with him now, actually fucking him, like he always wanted. So he just basked in the feeling of you, not caring about anything else.

"Ah, yes... thank you..." He muttered whenever you thrusted a bit harder than the pace you were going at. He kept his arms wrapped around your neck, murmuring anything positive that he could possibly think of, coherent or not. You thought it was adorable, how vocal he was. He barely ever talked, so to hear him rambling so much about how good he felt, about how desperate he was for anything from you, it made you a bit giddy. He was, indeed, acting like you were royalty, smiling with every moan as though he'd kiss the very ground you walked on. You didn't really mind much at all. As long as he felt good. And it definitely seemed like it.

After a few minutes of testing the waters, you decided to give Shota a taste of his own medicine. You hooked your arms under the other's knees, pushing them up to his chest. He let out a little yelp, followed by a drawn out moan as you picked up the pace. The new position made you push even deeper, and it made tears prick at his eyes. Now, he really couldn't think. Each word he managed to sputter out became less and less coherent as he completely lost himself in the feeling of you so deep inside of him.

It didn't take very long before he hit his high, whimpering the entire way through and desperately trying to be just a little bit quieter. He didn't even mention the fact that he was cumming, didn't even move to touch himself through it. He didn't want to disappoint you by cumming too soon. You noticed this, of course, but it's not like you cared. Even if he did want to stop, that was completely fine by you. It didn't exactly seem like he wanted to do anything of the sort, though, so you teased him a bit for trying — and failing — to keep quiet.

"Where'd all of those cute little noises go?" You mumbled, leaning down to kiss him yet again. You slowed down slightly, not wanting to overwhelm him too much, but when you did, he whined louder. "Aww, you want me to keep going?" He nodded fervently, holding onto you even tighter, so you readjusted and sped back up again. Lo and behold, his noises came back even louder than before.

"It's too— feels— fuck, I can't—" He kept tripping up, and you just smiled, tucking a flyaway strand of hair behind his ear. You were barely inches away from each other from how tightly he was holding on to you, and he didn't want to let go. Everything he was feeling was so strong, especially with no rest after he came, so every time you did something even remotely gentle, he whined loudly. A brush, a ghost, a breath, and Shota was there, mewling under you.

When Shota's arms finally gave out on him and he couldn't hold himself up on you anymore, collapsing back against the mattress, you took a moment to readjust, and you ended up glancing back over at the nightstand. You realized then that there was a small vibrator that you hadn't noticed before sitting on the wooden table. It was too tempting, you couldn't help yourself. You grabbed the toy with a playful grin, pressing it against the other's already oversensitive tip before turning it on.

Shota practically wailed. Tears finally fell from his pretty lashes as he became completely consumed by pleasure, letting himself tremble and cry in your beautifully sadistic hold. His very last bit of composure crumbled immediately, and he devolved into nothing but a puddle of noises as every nerve ending of his lit on fire with pleasure.

He could barely move. He writhed against the bed, searched for your hand with his blurry vision. He squeezed tight when he found it, searching for anything that floated in the midst of his drowning. Shota slowly descended further and further into a state of the purest delight, only whining and crying even more when you covered his mouth, his muffled sound still more than loud enough to hear. It was no surprise that he was cumming again within the blink of an eye, nearly screaming into the flesh of your hand.

When he did come down from the high, this time, he did need a moment to recuperate, just sitting up to lean on you for a few minutes while you soothed his shaky muscles and wet cheeks. He sniffled softly, but didn't seem to actively be crying. He just took deep breaths while you ran your hand through his hair. It didn't last as long as you expected, though, because it seemed like just as soon as he wanted you off of of him, Shota was crawling back on top of you.

"My turn." He muttered hoarsely. "I'll do the work this time." Well, Shota more than kept his promise.

His legs shook and his hips stuttered each time he pulled himself up, and another soft sob escaped his lips every time he dropped back down. He definitely knew what he wanted. The way his eyelids fluttered when he got you to wrap your hand around his neck told you enough. He rode you like it was going out of style, whining with nearly every movement, keening with each little squeeze of your fingers. Shota was desperate to feel every inch of you, to make himself yours in any way possible. Even if it meant continuing on after not a dribble left him when he came yet again.

Shota didn't seem to care, though, even if he was openly weeping by the time you flipped him over onto his tummy. He kicked his legs, whining as the empty feeling of whatever he felt like without you. All you could do was chuckle as you pushed back in with a groan. How the hell did he still feel so perfectly tight around you?

While leaning in to kiss in between his shoulder blades, you glanced around only to find Shota's phone, somehow still unlocked and on that picture of you. You grinned, reaching over while still gripping the other's hips with a near incredible strength.

"You like getting off on pictures, perv?" You asked rhetorically. You already knew the answer, of course. "I'll give you pictures to get off to." Scrolling to the camera, you hit record, holding back your soft laughs while his moans only got louder and more open.

"P—please, please, gonna cum again..." Shota whined while you egged him on, cooing softly from behind his phone. "Please, please don't stop, don't... don't stop I need you, I need it..."

"Go on then, cum for me... c'mon..." Your words were drowning him, your thrusts got faster, sloppier, you were close too. "Gonna cum with me? Hm?" You asked, still somewhat steadily grasping the phone, and he nodded, happy to do whatever words fell from your lips. When Shota did finally finish with a few sobs, you weren't far behind, pulling out to paint his back while you added a few pictures to his camera roll for good measure.

After a small stretch of nothing but your mingled panting and Shota's little sounds, you leaned down again, this time to brush his hair back and press a kiss to his temple. "You okay?" you asked simply. He nodded.

"Thank you." He whispered, relaxing his head back against the pillow.

You smiled, softer this time. Content. "Let me clean you up."

So you did. Before Shota could doze off fully, a warm cloth pressed against his back, soothing his strained muscles and wiping away the immorality of what only felt like moments prior. He whined loudly at the contact, oversensitive and oh so tired. Eventually, you just picked the other up and carried him to the washroom, letting him rest in the hot bath while you cleaned up in the bedroom. You changed the sheets, lit a candle, wiped a couple hard surfaces down. When you were both sufficiently clean and ready, you pulled Shota from the bath, helping him dry off while he giggled with a sudden bout of embarrassment.

As you both crawled back into his bed, though, he hugged you. "Don't leave." He muttered, doubt creeping back into his mind that soon enough, you'd be gone.

"I'm not going to. Not alone." You decided. "You're coming with me. We'll figure out the world together."

He didn't respond. He just smiled, curling up closer and sighing softly.

When he fell asleep, you grabbed your own phone, tapping around a bit with a hand still buried in that bright blond hair. He moved around only slightly, making a few more almost unnoticeable noises. But you noticed.

You took a look at the plane ticket you had on your phone. You contemplated for a moment. It was just a cheap ticket, somewhere relatively nearby.

You bought another one.

—

Riki honestly didn't think he was that far behind. Okay, so he was twenty years old and you were his first partner, what about it? It was silly relationship stuff. How much could he really miss in six years?

...A lot, is the answer. A whole lot.

He felt like such an idiot around you. He just couldn't seem to read you at all, even though it should've been easy. He was so lucky that you were the type of person to tell him exactly what you wanted, liked and didn't like, so he didn't have to try — and probably fail — to guess.

Poor Riki. He barely knew how to kiss you, blushed when you held his hand, completely froze when you played with his hair. Now, finally home after a tour that nearly killed him mentally and physically, he was so tired, and so, so pent up. He thought those teenage hormones had balanced out at last, and yet, he was harder than he'd ever been, trying to hide it by laying face down on the mattress, feigning sleep. But he was such a bad actor.

"Riki," You whispered as you moved to rub his back. You didn't know exactly what was going on yet, but you knew he was hiding something. "What's up, honey? Why are you hiding from me?" He sighed heavily, burying his face into the pillow as if it would hide his shame. He could feel himself straining against his underwear, and he desperately wished he could just tell you how he wanted help.

"Nothing." He responded shortly, trying and failing miserably to be nonchalant as his voice cracked halfway through the word. After another gentle nudge, he finally lifted his head up, looking at you with the saddest puppy dog eyes anyone had ever seen.

"I'm... I'm so hard right now, and I don't know what to do about it because I'm so tired. I'm so tired right now..." He whined ever so softly, as if he were dying because of this scenario alone. When you chuckled, he buried his head back into the pillow, whining again. "Don't laugh..." He sounded so embarrassed. It was so unlike him now, for him to act so cute, even unintentionally.

"I'm not laughing, honey." You whispered, even though you were stifling another little giggle. "Why don't you let me help you?" You moved a bit closer to him. He felt himself throb, but he didn't want to burden you... plus, he'd always wanted his first time to be that stereotypical, overly-romantic kind of experience.

"I just... I should probably just sleep it off. It's fine." Even though the prospect of you helping him sounded wonderful, he didn't feel like it would be fair, making you help him.

"Hey, c'mon," You pressed down just a little bit harder and he let out a low moan. "You're tired, you're horny, I get it. I can make you feel better." Your voice was so soothing, careful and playful and a little bit raspy from fatigue, he wanted you to speak to him like that for all of eternity.

"Will you be gentle?" He managed to whisper, internally hitting himself. He knew you would be. He was just paranoid.

"So gentle. I'll make you feel so good. If you'll let me." He was about to cry, at this point. You were so prepared for any answer, like all of this came as naturally to you as breathing. Riki was almost envious. But he still wanted you more than anything.

"Yeah." He nodded, rolling over onto his back. When you repeated his sentiment, he nodded again. "Yes, please..." He choked out, leaning his head back and closing his eyes. He was still so sleepy.

When you kissed him, though, it definitely gave him a little boost of energy. He kissed back, still a little bit messy as he hadn't exactly found his groove yet. Not that you seemed to care, as you continued to kiss him, only breaking from his lips when you desperately needed to. He whined every time you did, and he got antsy when your lips strayed from his for more than a few seconds. Though, he didn't seem to mind it as much when you trailed from his lips to his jaw, then his neck, then his collarbones... he was ecstatic that you were kissing him wherever you wanted. He was just a bit too tired to express it properly, instead just letting out soft whimpers that, compared to his speaking voice, were quite high in pitch.

It wasn't too long after that that you had Riki's legs hooked around your waist and your fingers buried inside him. Terrified that he was going to humiliate himself, he tried to bite back the moans that crept up his throat, which only made them higher in pitch, in turn embarrassing him even more. You, however, thought it was the cutest thing in the world.

"Why are you trying to hide from me, Riki?" You whispered in between his little noises so he could hear what you were saying. "I want to hear you. I want to know how good I'm making you feel. Make some noise for me, honey." After finally getting confirmation that he wasn't a complete loser, he let his jaw drop as your fingers curled just enough inside of him that he thought he'd reached nirvana. He didn't realize that he would ever feel so good in his life, and he definitely wanted to portray that to you, somehow. Unfortunately, words weren't exactly his strong suit at that particular moment, so instead of saying something like "You make me feel so good, don't stop, I don't want this feeling to end," what came out was

"Fuck— you, ahh— feels s-so good, please don't st— mmh, fuck, please—"

By the time you pulled your fingers out of him, he was already a mess, sputtering and whimpering at the loss of stimulation. His face was flushed redder than a tomato, he was covered in hickeys and love bites, he was aching, and he was so close he didn't even realize it. He just wanted you.

Riki was nearly overwhelmed. Still, though, he happily let you in between his legs, let you wrap your hand around him, let you push his legs up until his knees were halfway to his chest... when you finally thrust into him, he nearly screamed. It was as though heaven and hell had collided and created something new and terrifying and beautiful. He was panting, unabashedly moaning with every fraction of movement. He babbled on as you continued soothing him with kisses, begging for less, then more as the painstakingly slow pace was set. He wished that he was better with his words, that he could properly tell you that you were right, and he'd never felt better in his life. But his mind was so hazy that all he could think of was to pant out thanks and curse and whine and cry. The worst part, he would later find out, was that this all happened in the span of less than a minute.

It only took a minute more before Riki was cumming, spilling over your hand with a loud keen and an arched back. He was breathing heavily, tears pricking at his eyes he writhed, somehow getting even louder as he came all over your hand and his own stomach. When he did begin to come down from the high, it was slowly. He was so sensitive, and every little shift made him gasp or hiss softly. He kissed you a few more times. Your lips, even if just on his, took away any tenderness that he had. He barely wanted to clean himself up, only letting you when you had peppered enough kisses over the expanse of his face.

When you settled back into bed, he cuddled up to you as close as possible. Unlike him, sure, but he felt a lot softer, now. Not that his walls had been broken down, but like the gate was opened, just enough to let you in. He fell sleep quickly, with your hand in his hair as he snored softly against your chest. He felt like he could conquer the world, now, because of that experience alone.

Was it what he'd pictured? Not in the slightest. Still, he wouldn't trade it for anything in the world. And he'd go on a hundred more tours, as long as he got to experience that when he got home again.

—

Riku wasn't usually so shy; at least, not around other guys. The other Wishies were his best friends, the rest of NCT he was completely fine around. Staff, strangers, friends of friends, anybody else, he was just fine.

But some sort of switch flipped the minute he met you.

You were handsome, but a pretty kind of handsome, where you weren't super rugged and masculine but rather noticably comfortable and even androgynous with your looks, style, and physical identity. You always greeted him casually, kindly, dapping him up or opening your arms for a hug, to which he always obliged; because he wanted to return your kindness, not because he loved the smell of your cologne on you. You were just so amazing and cool, talented and laid back... how could be not fall in love with you?

He struggled with it first, of course, it was only natural. But eventually, he came to accept that he was so in love with you it made him see doubles and trip over his own feet and sigh longingly like he was in a nineties sitcom.

When he told you, he was practically wasted, barely able to hold his head upright as he confessed his adoration for you. He didn't expect you to even be remotely into men, let alone want him, so when he asked to kiss your beautiful lips and you refused, it solidified it for him — he made the wrong choice, and now you hated him forever — even after you assured him it was just because he was drunk and you didn't want to do anything with him while he was in a state where he could barely think properly. When you drove him home shortly after, he cried the entire way, apologizing, trying to convince you not to despise him as you held his hand or played with his hair, trying to get him home safely while also comforting him or trying to assure him that it was okay for him to have feelings for you.

He cried as you helped him inside his apartment, as you made sure he was able to change into pajamas, and as you tucked him into bed and kissed his forehead. He cried until he fell asleep, and when he woke up, he felt even worse, both physically and emotionally, so he cried a little bit more.

He had just stumbled out of the bathroom after hacking his guts out for about five minutes when a gentle knock was placed on his door. When he opened it and saw you, he almost started crying again. You had flowers, medication to help with his hangover, and a few of his favourite snacks, and a gentle smile. You spoke in that smooth, wonderful baritone of yours, softly apologizing for not kissing him last night, but wanting to save it for when he was sober and knew what he was doing. He hugged you tighter than he'd ever hugged anybody before, thanking you profusely and apologizing for the mess he'd been the night prior. You stayed for a while, making sure he was okay and talking it out, and when you left, you were his boyfriend, and he was yours.

It was definitely something new for Riku. He was adapting slowly to being with a man, and while he loved you to death, he was still a bit scared of the unknown.

You made sure to make him as comfortable as possible, asking him or letting him initiate physical touch only if he was okay with it, buying him snacks or little gifts, cooking for him, doing anything you could possibly think if to make sure he felt secure in your relationship.

It didn't take long for him to get comfortable, though. Soon enough, he was kissing your cheeks, stealing your clothes — or a bite or two of your food — and telling you that he loved you.

It did take a while before he began thinking about an intimate relationship between the two of you, but even with his 'research'... which consisted of watching a few adult videos and googling a few things he didn't understand, he was nervous about bringing it up.

One night, though, after dinner, you two were lounging around on the couch, cuddled up together, when he suddenly asked you,

"Have you ever had sex with another man before?"

He immediately slapped a hand over his mouth after he said it, his face going beet red as the words slipped from his mouth before he could even process that he was saying them.

You only chuckled though, placing your phone down and looking at him as he looked away from you.

"I have. ...I assume you haven't?" You smiled, trying to crack a small joke to make him feel better.

He nodded, still embarrassed from his sudden outburst.

"Riku, don't hide from me, pretty-" You shifted, trying to pull his hands away from his face, but he only curled up further. So, you relented, gently petting his hair in an attempt to soothe him.

"You know, it's okay to talk to me about these things. Actually, I want you to talk to me about it. It helps me know where you're at experience wise and what you're okay with." You explained as you carefully twisted a strand of his hair around your finger.

After a minute or two, he found the courage to speak up again, still hiding behind his hands. "I'm nervous..." He mumbled.

"Is there anything that would make you less nervous?" You asked, back to your agenda of making sure he was as comfortable as possible.

"Maybe, uhm... your hoodie or something?" He said genuinely, and you smiled, pulling back just enough to slip your hoodie off and over Riku's head. He slipped his arms through the sleeves, taking a deep breath, trying to focus on the excess cologne - the scent that he now unabashedly loved - that had rubbed off onto your sweater.

"I'm not... I'm not super experienced anyway, but... I've never been with a man before, so I don't know how it works, or what I'm okay with, and..." he trailed off, beginning to get worked up again. You brushed a thumb over his cheekbone, just happy that he wasn't hiding from you anymore

"It's okay to not know." You whispered, trying to reassure him as best as you could. For just a moment, it was quiet, but you spoke up again not too long after.

"Would you..." you threaded your fingers with his. "Like to figure it out?" He peered up at you and you just continued to smile softly, trying to help with the things he was nervous about.

"We'll go at your pace, and I'll be so gentle with you," you started, pulling him ever so slightly closer so he could hear your now quiet mumble of a voice.

"And you can tell me everything that feels good. I'll help you, as long as you want me to. Just let me know, okay? It doesn't even have to be right now, just... whenever you're ready, tell me." You pressed a kiss to his cheek and waited patiently as he processed all of your words.

"...Okay." He finally said after a few minutes. "I want you to help me figure out what I like. Please." You couldn't help but chuckle softly at how adorable Riku was, your beautiful man who just wanted some guidance from you.

So, you slowly stood and led him to the bedroom, letting him situate himself on the mattress before you joined him.

"Are you comfortable with taking anything off right now?" You asked, and he paused for a moment before nodding and moving to take the hoodie and his shirt off, leaving him bare-chested before you.

You'd seen him shirtless before, but in this new context, it was even better. "Oh my god, you're so handsome..." You ran your fingertips over his toned abdomen, causing him to shiver ever so slightly.

"Can... can you take your shirt off, too?" He whispered, and you nodded, complying pretty much immediately.

He visibly relaxed now that both of you were semi-nude. He wanted to move a bit faster, but simultaneously, the thought of what came after his pants were off made him even more nervous.

But then your lips found his neck, and he melted. All of his nervousness and stress seemed to crumble as you graced his neck in open-mouthed kisses, sucking gently in certain spots to form a few hickeys in places that weren't too obvious, just for his sake.

"I-I like that... keep going, please." He wrapped his arms around your neck, and you carefully pushed him back, until his head laid against the pillows. He let out a few little noises as you marked up his neck, which began to turn to breathy whimpers when your kisses trailed lower. When they reached just below his collarbones, his hand found its way to your hair.

"Keep me updated, okay, Riku?" You mumbled against his skin, and he hummed in agreeance, the vibration of your voice against the sensitive flesh of his collarbones making him a bit ticklish.

Almost agonisingly slowly, your lips trailed to his navel, your hands roaming his torso as he occasionally assured you that he liked what you were doing and wanted you to keep going, accompanied by his quiet sounds every so often.

He gasped when your hands found his chest, fingers trailing over his nipples. You paused, but he just cleared his throat and spoke again.

"That's... that's good. I like that." He managed to find his voice, if only to get you to keep going.

With the added stimulation, it seemed like not long after you started to tease his nipples, he was grinding up, his body unconsciously trying to find some sort of relief for his dick; which had been aching for a while at this point.

He noticed you giggling softly, and the blush somehow got even darker. Was he doing something wrong? Was he too desperate? Pathetic?

"My poor boy," you whispered to him. "you need some relief?" you gently rubbed his thigh, your voice still hushed as you leaned back up, adjusting yourself to make sure both you and him were comfortable. Everything should've been normal, Riku shouldn't have had such a reaction, but his hips bucked hard as a short whine escaped him, because the way you cooed made him feel faint.

"Y-yes please." He breathed, shutting his eyes in a feeble attempt to ground himself, though he ended up rutting forward into nothing again.

The soft hum that you let out as you hooked your arms under his knees to pull him closer only made him whine louder, now fully uncomfortable with how hard he was and receiving no stimulation.

He was about to ask again, but his voice didn't even have time to get up his throat before your hips rolled against his and he nearly saw stars.

The noises he let out were completely involuntary. He practically squirmed in your hold, hands reaching to grasp your biceps so his soul didn't immediately leave his body.

"Again—! Please, please do that again please—" He begged, letting out a shameless moan as you did so. A tiny part of him felt disgusting and pathetic, but the way you made him feel was way, way too good to actually care.

You, of course, took note of his reaction, and for the next little while, you continued to just roll your hips gently, not needing to speed up or be any harder, as he seemed to be in heaven from the soft friction alone. He writhed, whining as his hips bucked involuntarily to meet you own. By the time you slowed to a halt, he was panting, eyes unfocused as he lifted his head to look at you.

"Why—" Riku cleared his throat, but that didn't help much. "Why are you stopping? Please, please don't stop, I was— that felt so good..." He whispered, beginning to overthink things again. But you made them all disappear with that velvety-smooth voice of yours.

"Do you want me to take these off?" You muttered into the heat of the room, fingers hooking under his waistband. With how on edge he now was, it wasn't a surprise that he nodded fervently, squeaking out a quiet yes please.

So, off they came, with you pulling back just enough to be able to see all of him.

Yet, after his pants came off, he seemed to get shy again. He squeezed his legs shut, tilting his head back a bit and biting his lip nervously, as if he didn't even want to see himself, let alone have you see him, too.

You gently placed your hands on his bent knees, pressing a little kiss to one of them.

"Will you let me see you, pretty?" You asked, moving your hands down to massage his calves slightly.

After a moment, Riku took a deep breath and nodded, to which he let you gently pull his legs open, just enough to see him in all of his glory.

"Riku, you're so beautiful..." You smiled sweetly, now holding his waist as you shuffled a bit closer.

He really was. His honey-like skin was prettier than anything you'd seen before, the tint of blush trailing from his face down to his chest causing you to smile... his beautiful cock, leaking like a faucet as it waited impatiently for you to get back to what you were doing.

"Can you... will you take yours off, too?" He mumbled, still dealing with traces of that previous nervousness.

"Of course, pretty. Anything for you." You pulled back for a moment to slip the rest of your articles off. When you settled back to where you were prior, Riku was taking in the sight of you, trying to wrap his head around the fact that everything about you just seemed so perfect.

When his eyes finally flicked down to your length, his jaw nearly dropped. You were big. Big enough to put him — who thought he was of decent size — to shame. He obviously stared for far too long, because you spoke up after a brief pause.

"Like what you see?" You joked, and he smiled, chuckling as he turned his head away and placed a hand over his eyes.

You leaned back down and kissed his jaw a few times, pulling his hand away. You were happy that you could make him laugh.

"Is there anything else in particular you want me to do?" You whispered, moving your careful kisses to his cheeks.

"Uhm... maybe, uh..." He stumbled over his words, blushing even harder as he tried to voice what he wanted from you. "Maybe you could just... just touch me? Or... or something?" He whispered, holding one of your hands.

"I can do that, if it's what you want, pretty." Your other hand moved to caress his thigh, slowly making its way to his awaiting cock.

Once your hand finally wrapped around him, he gasped again, which turned into a relieved sigh, then he leaned up to kiss you properly; you two barely had any time for air. Riku let out more soft noises into your mouth, eventually wrapping his arms around your neck yet again.

"Please..." He mumbled when he finally pulled away for some air. "Please, keep going, that feels... feels so good..." He whimpered before your lips connected again.

Eventually, you pulled back, deciding to ask him if he wanted to go any further.

"Do you want me to... do you want me to do anything else?" You pulled back just enough to ask, even though he chased your lips.

He nodded softly, murmurs rushing from his mouth as he attempted to catch your lips again. "I don't care. Please... please, I need something, anything..." He nodded again, finally pressing his lips to yours once more.

You continued to kiss him as you repositioned yourself, straddling his legs as he whimpered against your mouth. You wrapped a steady hand around his cock, straining your fingers as you added yours.

Riku was so sensitive, and so to have not only your hand, but also your own length pressed against his, he couldn't help but let out a loud — and frankly, embarrassing — moan as his arms found your neck again. He wasn't going to last long like this.

And he didn't. The feeling of his dick against yours was entirely too much to bear, and within just a couple of minutes, he was cumming hard, his body tensing and his moans turning into stutters as he clung tighter to you. It didn't take long for you to cum after Riku, pent up from keeping all of your focus on him the whole time.

By the time he finally went limp against the bed, shaky and giggly and sated, you were already cleaning him up with tissues. Before he knew it, a washcloth was next. Soon enough, he was fully clothed again, cuddled up with you as you played with his hair.

"That was... good." He said, before laughing at his own bashfulness.

"I'm glad." You responded with a soft chuckle of your own.

"Can we do that again sometime?" He added, looking up at you with those big, puppy-dog eyes that you could never seem to resist.

"You think I'm gonna say no to that?" You smiled. "Whenever you're ready, pretty." You kissed his forehead.

"How about like... twenty minutes?" He insisted before cuddling up closer to you.

—

To put it lightly, you were a little bit pissed off. Not necessarily at Shota, but... definitely at Shota. You were just outside, taking a nice little walk in the snow, when he decided to start throwing snowballs. At you. You told him to stop, but he didn't, and in the end, you both got sick; you, because he kept throwing snow at you, and him because he had been holding the snow with his bare hands... and maybe because you finally snapped and shoved some snow down the back of his shirt.

You had never taken Shota to be so much of a complainer. He usually knew how to find the positive in everything. But it seemed like the moment he started sniffling, he turned into a completely different person. For example, at the moment, he was draped across your back, hugging you tightly as you lazily bent over a pot of soup on the stove. You stirred the pot carefully, and whenever you had the audacity to shift, even just a bit, Shota would whine against your back, holding you tighter and complaining that you needed to stand still. You could only let out a sigh as you grabbed a tablespoon to let the other taste test your attempt at a hearty chicken noodle soup. You finally pried him from your back, tempting him with the prospect of food, but the moment the spoon hit his lips, he was nearly hacking, begging for water.

"It's so salty!" He tried to yell, but it came out as more of a squeak as his voice was completely gone from all of the coughing and dryness of his throat. You thought he was just overreacting, but one taste and you too were searching for a glass of water to rid the overly-salty taste from your mouth. Well, that went well. You had no idea how either of you were going to recover before an upcoming music video shoot, which was — looking at the calendar — five days away. Oh well, you could just rest, order in and take it easy, maybe binge a show or two, and try again tomorrow.

Your eyes fluttered open as you heard Shota quietly rage at his computer. You were confused as to why he was even awake. Did he not still feel like absolute garbage? Honestly, you didn't know if you would be happy if he was feeling better, as with the way you felt, you would probably be jealous. So, you propped yourself up on your elbow, murmuring groggily towards the other.

"Shota? What are you doing?" You were able to ask before falling into a bit of a coughing fit. He looked over at you from his desk with big, precious eyes, smiling a bit.

"Playing Minecraft." He responded. He, at the very least, still sounded sick. You chuckled softly, sitting up a bit more with your eyes closed to try and quell the sinus headache that might as well have been rattling your skull.

"Shota, you should come back to bed and rest." You laid back down, unable to hold yourself up any longer. "Being lazy is the best cure."

"Our chickens, silly." He emphasized, pointing at the screen. "Who is going to take care of our chickens— our children!" Now, he was just being stubborn. You shook your head softly, reaching over to your nightstand to grab the glass of water you had been nursing throughout the night due to your frequent coughing fits.

"You're going to feel like shit tomorrow." You only mumbled before passing back out for another few hours while Shota tended to your shared Minecraft base.

You woke up again, only slightly, when you felt him crawl back into bed, snuggling against you for warmth. He made sure that your arms were wrapped securely around him, making a few happy noises before settling and falling asleep in your embrace. Four more days, you could do this.

Surprisingly — not — your prediction was correct, and the next day, Shota felt worse than ever. He didn't even want to get out of bed. You called out to Jongseob, who stumbled into your room, half-asleep and very annoyed that you had chosen to wake him.

"What?" He asked, rubbing his eyes.

"Will you go out and get some medicine for me and Shota?" You asked, batting your eyelashes as if that would've convinced Jongseob.

"Absolutely not." He grumbled, turning to leave your room, but you interjected. "I'll give you my card and you can get food for everyone, too. Your pick." You desperately tried to convince him, as you did not feel like going outside, especially when Shota was like this. As much as you were upset with him for getting you sick, it was hard to be mad at him when he was clinging to you like a lost puppy, begging you to rub his back to make him feel marginally better.

"...Fine. I'm buying a fuckton of food, though." Jongseob snatched your wallet off of your bedside table, and you sighed. At least you would get medicine. Plus, maybe you would be able to use the whole 'buying food' part to your advantage at another time. Right now, you were just glad that you could convince Jongseob to buy some medicine.

As you waited, you decided to dote on Shota a little bit, rubbing his back and making sure he was comfortable and warm under the blankets before putting on a cute, silly, animated show; something that didn't need much brain power to understand, if any.

When Jongseob finally returned, tossing the medicine onto your bed and giggling about all of the food he bought, you practically had to force feed it to Shota, who wanted nothing to do with taking either liquid medicine or a pill. You finally got him to take it, and though he whined and grimaced, he was out like a light within half an hour, leaving you to finally get a bit of rest. It was all looking up; you could both totally be better within three days for the shoot.

Unfortunately, though Shota was feeling much better the next day, you, with all of your doting and worrying, felt awful. Shota decided, though, that it would be a good idea to drag you out of bed and into the bathroom, for whatever reason.

When you got into the bathroom, you noticed that Shota had run a bath, loading it up with bubble bath and keeping the lights dimmed slightly on account of your practically unending headache. Damn, now it was extra difficult to stay mad at him, especially when he was kissing your cheek and slipping your shirt over your head.

Shota was a completely different person when you finally slipped into the hot bath. He got in behind you and just hugged you for a few minutes, his arms around your torso and his chin resting on your shoulder. He hummed a little bit, and you couldn't help but relax against him. Moments like this nearly gave you whiplash, as you sometimes forgot how lovely he was with how silly he normally acted.

He washed your hair for you and massaged a lot of the tension out of your shoulders, humming gently as he did so. The raspberry scented bubble bath was hard to smell over how stuffed up you were, but the few slight whiffs of it were incredibly nice. The steam from the bath did help clear your sinuses a bit, too, and by the time Shota was drying you off, you actually felt human again. As long as you two took it easy tomorrow, the shoot in two days would be a piece of cake.

All day, you had been hanging out on the couch, doing nothing. You just napped, watched tv, scrolled whatever social media you felt like scrolling through. Shota had been doing his own thing, probably playing Minecraft again. You felt a lot better, and you were glad your plan was working.

Shota eventually padded into the main area of the apartment, still sniffling, but only slightly. You peeked out from behind your phone and he pulled your arms apart, carefully maneuvering himself to lay on top of you. You didn't question it, letting him cuddle with you and bury his face against your chest. He stayed like that for a moment, before whispering so quietly that if you'd had anything playing in the background, you wouldn't have heard it.

"Thank you for taking care of me." He mumbled, trying to pull you impossibly closer, as if he were trying to meld the two of you together. "I love you."

You smiled, tilting his head up so that he was looking at you. You brushed his hair out of his eyes and leaned your head forward to press a kiss to his forehead. "I love you too, you know I don't mind." You paused for a moment, before adding, "Thank you for taking care of me." His little smile was enough to make your heart flutter. "Plus," You continued, "I wanted to make sure we were both okay again for that shoot tomorrow."

Jongseob, who was sitting in another seat nearby, glanced up from his phone as his eyebrows furrowed. "Tomorrow? ...We're not shooting that music video until next week."

Now, you were a little bit pissed off for an entirely different reason.