A few months went by when a small position opened up for me at a K-8 Christian school. Unfortunately, the Lord said no.

I held out hope that God would lead me to where I needed to be. A couple weeks after this disappointment, God opened up an opportunity for me to work at a children’s swim school. While not ideally what I had in mind, I went for it anyway — desperate to leave behind the job I had.

It turned out that this wasn’t the right fit for me. What I had initially thought would be an opportunity for me to finally work with kids and teach was actually me continuing what I had been doing… customer service. Week in and week out, I stood behind a computer desk for hours, wondering if I had made the right move or if I had just been impulsive.

I quit in exactly 3 months. But God opened another door.. an opportunity for me to teach at a kids summer camp to help them review and retain knowledge until the start of the next school year.

But as with any summer job, eventually it came to an end. I had minimal experience, but experience nonetheless. I looked for more education jobs, but I didn’t meet any of the requirements needed. Since it was my last semester in college anyway, I decided to truly focus on those 6 classes I was taking and went unemployed for the entire time. I didn’t want to rush into another decision as I had done earlier in the year.

2 weeks after I had finished my last course, God opened yet another door for me — this time, in the form of being a substitute PE teacher.

And boy did she contact me. Without even having time to breathe. I was thrown in the fire. Within the next week, I had already been scheduled to sub for two different schools.

But by the 2nd week, I was being told that rather than take over for the teacher leaving for paternity leave, there was another teacher who was moving across the country. They offered me to take over his school, I prayed to God for guidance, and the next thing I know, I have a regular schedule. And I fell in love with the school site.

I have spent 3 school years at this site. I’ve gotten to know all the kids (pre-K all the way to the 8th grade). I’ve gotten to know the staff, the community, the parents. I couldn’t have asked God for a better place to develop as an educator. I looked forward to going into work every single day.

And now tomorrow is my last day there. Tomorrow, I have to say goodbye to all the faces I’ve gotten to know and love. Tomorrow, I’m going to have to find ways to stop myself from crying in front of all of my kids. Tomorrow is going to be one of the toughest days of my life.

But it’s only tough because God is so faithful. I kept praying for an opportunity to get into the classroom. PE was great to get my feet wet, but my undergrad was specifically for elementary education — classroom teaching. And if you haven’t noticed the theme yet, God has opened yet another door.

After interviewing with the Principal and Vice-Principals, after teaching a demo history lesson in front of a live class, after meeting with the head Pastor of the church attached to the school, I have been offered a 3rd Grade Teacher position at a K-8 Christian school (a different one) 10 minutes away from where I live.

I write this post as a way to see and reflect on the bigger picture of God’s faithfulness. That, 4 years ago, I began praying that God will bring me to a place where I needed to be. That, 3 years ago, the Lord said no to me because He knew that I just needed to be patient and wait on His timing. That, 2 years ago, He knew where to place me in order to cultivate me into the teacher I am growing into. That, right now, although this goodbye is going to be one of the most difficult things I’ll ever have to deal with, it’s going to be worth it because I know that this opportunity is what I’ve prayed for all these years.

I find rest in those questions of finding someone who will want to be with me by first knowing I am loved by God and not because I’m a mess up and need love, but because He saw my value through my mistakes.

And I believe we all, if we have faith will find someone who will be with us for who they know us to be through God’s love, not through our past.

The only thing more difficult than waiting on God is wishing that you had.