The Groovy Ghost

***SPOILERS AHEAD***

Last night, my friends and I made it to a screening of the final episode of The Amazing Digital Circus. I’ve been a fan since the pilot, so I was excited to see how this would all end. Maybe a bit too excited. See, I kind of saw some leaks before I even stepped foot in that theater. I know. The Zach Hadel Fish would hate me. But I just couldn’t help myself!

To probably that ugly fish’s dismay, it wasn’t just me that sought out leaks. My timeline was chock-full of them. Seriously, I couldn’t scroll anywhere without a major plot point just being right there in the open. And, of course, the Internet had its opinions on it.

While I didn’t watch the entire leaked episode, I saw plenty of fans giving it a hard time. Personally, I didn’t find this very fair. Judging the entire ending off a few random leaks was putting the digital cart before the amazing horse. So, I held off my thoughts until I saw the entire thing, the way it was intended.

Overall, I had a fun time. It was probably the most fun I’ve had at a theater in a while. Before this, my last trip to the movies was for The Super Mario Galaxy Movie. Which was cute, but I was on a horrible date when I saw it. The guy told me he was 6’0. He was a whopping 5’5 at best. It doesn’t help that I’m 5’10. He also made me pay for everything. Embarrassing for him. I give up on men, but anywho-

It was great seeing everyone not take themselves too seriously and simply enjoy the movie. I saw plenty of great cosplays and people being silly with each other. Someone had even made a buff Kinger for the occasion. I’m always amazed to see the dedication of fandom culture. Especially when it’s in my own stomping grounds. I sometimes forget there’s other nerds lurking around my small town.

My friends and I cosplayed too! I chose Jax, because yes, unfortunately, he reminds me of myself. I also use humor as a coping mechanism. Sorry. And a couple of people even asked us for pictures! Wonder if they knew they met the legendary Groovy Ghost in person? I guess we’ll never know.

It was also cool to see everyone’s live reactions to the finale. Maybe that’s swaying my opinion, but I enjoyed the final episode. That being said, I don’t think it was a flawless episode. It certainly had its issues. The main focus being just Jax, the other characters feeling incomplete, as well as some of the lore aspects being left unanswered. Although, at this point, I think that believing every tiny lore point has to be explored is a bit of a dork want. I know the casual fans aren’t even going to think like that, so I’m willing to give it some grace.

I personally don’t know how to feel about how they handled Jax’s character. I understand that many people are going to be overjoyed that the jerk purple rabbit is dead. In many ways, he actually kind of deserved it. Even still, it rubs me the wrong way that the moment he tries to be better, he’s killed off. He abstracted and was turned into a pet, with a collar and all. I’m not sure if that’s the best ending for a character that seems to have suffered his entire life. That trope has been getting on my nerves lately. Seems like the only way writers know how to deal with traumatized characters is to kill them off at the very last second. To me, that’s lazy and unfair in a lot of ways. But I reckon Jax is still alive in the real world so there’s that.

I saw fans mention that the finale did little to change their opinion on Jax. In the show’s defense, I think there was little to be done about that. Jax is a highly polarizing character. Plenty of people love him, but plenty of others hate his guts too. I figure wherever side you take is where you’re going to stay after watching this episode. Those sides have been established way before this and there’s no changing it now, even if the finale made Jax look like the best guy ever.

I might be telling on myself a little bit, but I walked away relating even more to that darn purple rabbit. I was drawn to him in the beginning because we both have the same unhealthy coping mechanisms. The second something seems real to me, I run. It’s easier to just make a joke of it. I know that’s not healthy, but I saw that part of myself in Jax.

This feeling only worsened for me in the finale. Jax ends up telling Ribbit that his parents split when he was in high school. His father left his life, which put a strain on his and his mother’s relationship. Story of my life. I was read like a damn book. You might as well have put a mirror in front of the big screen. For better or for worse, I walked away relating even more to Jax, the evil bunny.

As much as I enjoy Jax, I do wish we could have seen the other character’s backstories as well. Even as a fan, I can admit he has hogged the narrative this entire series. I would’ve loved to see that spotlight go to someone else. We know very little of the other characters, their real lives were mentioned very briefly. Heck, we still don’t know much about Pomni, and she’s supposedly the main character!

While there are some valid critiques, I do want to defend the ending. I think a lot of people are misunderstanding where the story wanted to go. Oddly, I haven’t seen anyone talk about it. So, I guess it’s time I shoot my shot.

To make a long story short, they don’t make it out of the circus. They literally cannot escape. They technically aren’t even “real.” They’re just brain scans, which means their real selves have been cutting it up in the real world this entire time. It seems like their human counterparts are unaware of the circus, or at the very least each other. I’m curious as to how C&A even got the brain scans, and how they managed to put the headsets on. But alas, those questions are left unanswered.

Our crew finds peace in knowing apart of them is in the real world. In a way, they did sort of escape. Pomni seems fine in adopting this new role, even denying Caine’s attempt to call her by her human name. The gang accepts their new identities and sets off on new adventures together. Credits roll. The end.

I can see why people feel like this ending is anticlimactic. That’s because… it is. Though, I do think a lot of viewers are missing the hidden message behind it. There’s definitely more than just “We can’t escape! Oh well! Let’s give up and go on wacky adventures!”

We just have to do a little digging.

Check out this answer from the creator herself, Gooseworx:

“That there’s meaning to be found in a stagnant life.” That’s the real ending here. Pomni herself alludes to this in her monologue in episode 8:

“I think we need to abandon the idea of leaving. We got our hopes up and we were let down. I don’t know what exactly happened with Kaufmo but we can’t let that despair consume us. We should focus on what we have. Like you said, constantly chasing an unobtainable goal will drive us crazy. Maybe what we have to do now is to just… live.”

Apart of me thinks this should’ve been put in the last episode, just to really drive the point home. With so much after this moment, I think it’s easy for it to get lost. Even still, its point remains; life is worth living, even if it’s a little boring.

This is an oddly realistic ending for a series, especially one about colorful cartoon characters living in a digital circus. I don’t hate it though. I kind of like this spin on things, especially when a lot of writers just want to keep going bigger and bigger.

I keep beating this dead horse to a pulp, but this is one of the ways the Duffers Bros got lost with Stranger Things. They thought the only way to go was up, and suddenly the show’s original feel got lost in the mix. The show got so big it didn’t know what to do with itself. They got too big for their breeches, if you will.

I’m glad to see The Amazing Digital Circus avoided that same fate. It’s neat that they spun that expectation on its head. The show gave us something real and something we can apply to our real lives.

Alot of us like epic stories. Many of us like watching main characters fight bad guys and go on epic journeys. We may even find ourselves somewhere in these stories. But I hate to break it to you, we aren’t the main characters. The majority of us will live normal lives, doing normal things. We’ll never slay a dragon or save a princess, but that’s okay. There’s joy in being perfectly average.

Life is what you make of it. It’s your own digital circus. You are the ringmaster, at full control to do whatever you please. Make your own adventures. Know that joy is in the little things.

I have a masters in psychology. I also happen to be a huge media consumer. I’m like a greedy little Pacman, eating up whatever I can. Books, movies, TV shows, albums, whatever. If it exists, I probably know about it.

And since I’m a pop culture fiend who’s grossly over educated to understand human behavior, certain questions have always interested me. A big one being, how do we pick our favorite characters?

As any good little researcher will do, I did some digging. I found out that your favorite characters have a lot to say about you. In some ways, they are you.

Over the course of my psychological education, I quickly realized that humans are very self-centered. I don’t necessarily mean that in a negative way, we just like to see ourselves in things.

For example, imagine you’re at a party. Nothing major, just a small crowd of people. Maybe you’re talking with someone, and can hear quiet chatter around you. You’re not paying attention to any of the background conversation, it’s just noise. But imagine one of them happens to say your name. Odds are, even if you weren’t paying attention, you’d hear this. This is what’s referred to as the cocktail party effect. Or, the ability to subconsciously pick up bits of information. We’re always looking for self-relevant information, whether we know it or not.

Studies have shown that we tend to prefer information that references ourselves in some way or another. This includes letters of our name or brands/locations that reference our name.

Hey, I’ve never played any of the Professor Layton games… but the guy has a pretty solid name. Hi, hello, my name is Layton by the way.

There have also been brain response studies that show we tend to process self-relevant information quicker and memorize it longer than other information.

So, what I’m trying to say is, we like ourselves. We like when things involve us. Our brains seemed to be wired to pick this information out anywhere it can. Of course, the same thing applies to fictional characters.

Jonathan Cohan, who wrote Defining Identification: A Theoretical Look at the Identificafion of Audiences With Media Characters (www.communicationcache.com/uploads/1/0/8/8/10887248/defining_identification-_a_theoretical_look_at_the_identification_of_audiences_with_media_characters.pdf), argued that we temporarily become fictional characters while watching their stories. We like to put ourselves in their shoes, and experience their journey right along with them.

Stories explore character motives and perspectives, allowing audiences to understand them from an emotional level. This not only builds attachment to characters, but it’s an opportunity for audiences to adopt their viewpoints. Cohen claimed that audiences may take on certain aspects of fictional characters, and even internalize their actions. This is what leads to many fans defending morally grey, or even downright horrible characters. Somewhere along the way, we’ve adopted their point of view.

There’s also Krakowiak and Oliver, who published When Good Characters Do Bad Things: Examining the Effect of Moral Ambiguity on Enjoyment (https://onlinelibrary.wiley.com/doi/abs/10.1111/j.1460-2466.2011.01618.x). These ladies argued that characters do not have to be morally right to be likable, they just have to be understandable. Now traditional media theory would have you believe that superheroes are the most likable archetype. Strong, attractive, and morally righteous. Surely Marvel has been successful for a reason, right?

Krakowiak and Oliver argued that the more compelling character is flawed since more people can relate to them. They claimed that watching a character struggle leads to stronger emotional attachments than a character whose life is perfect.

Their argument checks out, at least if you’re asking me. Flawed characters are more human. We are more likely to see ourselves in flawed characters, since we have our own problems. Yes, everyone has issues. Even you, dear reader.

Even me, especially me.

Let’s go back to superheroes. Is it really their inhuman abilities and perfectly sculpted abs that make them interesting, I mean, sure, maybe. Or is it their deeply traumatic backstories? Just look at SpiderMan. That dude has suffered every day of his life, and everybody loves him!

This is a non researched based tangent here, but I think these theories are why “Mary Sues” are universally hated. If you don’t know what that is, here’s a handy dandy definition:

“A derogatory term for a fictional character who is unrealistically perfect, possesses unearned abilities, lacks meaningful flaws, and bends the narrative to their will.”

In other words, they’re not relatable. We can’t see ourselves in them because they’re uncannily perfect. Where’s the fun in that?

Now you might be thinking, my favorite character is nothing like me, this lady is crazy! True, I probably have a couple screws loose, but let me introduce you to the self-discrepancy theory. Coined by ET Higgins in 1987, this theory argues that the self is not singular… but rather three parts:

Actual Self: who we are in the present moment

Ideal Self: who we wish to be

Ought Self: who we should be

A lot of our favorite characters fall into one of these three categories. There’s characters that reflect your actual personality, but others show who you want to be.

As a kid, my ideal self favorite was definitely Rainbow Dash from My Little Pony. I mean, I’m cool.. but she’s 20% cooler.

Other theories suggest that fictional characters allow us to safely explore our own emotions. They give us a space to process how we feel without real consequences. This means that seeing a character’s story can sometimes impact our very real lives.

The most relevant example of this is definitely Heated Rivalry. Real athletes have shared their stories because Shane and Ilya gave them the space to.

A Concert Reflection

Let’s just get this out of the way. Yes, I know this is going to make me sound like the most annoying boomer you know.

But just listen.

By the grace of the concert gods, I was able to see Phoebe Bridgers on her popup tour in my hometown. Nobody ever plays here, it’s almost embarrassing. So imagine my surprise when a 4x grammy winner decides to come to little ole Huntington, West Virginia. It sent my best friend and me into panic. I swear we never moved faster in our lives. The entire drive to The Loud was a complete blur, but somehow we made it in line.

Once the initial shock had left, I had time to let things sink in. We made small talk with fans in line, the sun boiled my vampiric skin, and I realized just how cool of a show this was going to be.

Everything about this tour is physical. The show itself was announce by a simple flyer taped on the venue’s door. No formal announcements, no website updates, just a single piece of paper.

To get tickets, you had to physically be there. As a Ticketmaster veteran (who, at the time, just fought my latest battle for twenty one pilot’s at Ohio Stadium), I appreciated not having to deal with that sinister website. Seriously, I hate Ticketmaster’s guts.

And here’s the real kicker, the show banned electronics. All of it. No phones, no apple watches, no meta glasses. Just your eyeballs.

As someone who appreciates the 70s and 80s, I liked how this show was how they used to be. When I told my mother about the show, she commented on how Phoebe was giving us the “full 80s experience.” She wasn’t wrong. Even though I act ancient, I’m still very much Gen Z. It was fascinating to get a glimpse of how things used to be.

This may sound silly to my older audience, but these moments are always fascinating to those who have grown up with technology. Lately, I’ve been seeing a lot of online discourse surrounding how humans did simple tasks before AI. The most baffling one I’ve personally seen is “how did we write 10 pages of an essay without AI?”

But humans did it. Humans have survived thousands of years without smartphones and artificial intelligence. It’s so strange that we have convinced ourselves we can’t do anything without it. We can do so much more than we think we can, if we just put in the effort. It just takes some brainpower.

I like to think this is why so many people are turning to more physical media nowadays. Technology has simply taken over our lives, and some folks are finally fighting back. Things like books, vinyl, CDs, and journals are gaining popularity again. Physical items that you can hold and interact with. I think the resurgence stems from the fact some of us yearn for something tangible. Not something that’s on a screen. Something you can actually own.

After hours of waiting in line, it was finally time to see the show. I paid for my ticket, and my phone was locked away in a pouch for the night. Let me just say, it’s a weird feeling. As someone who fights the brainrot everyday, I’d love to tell you everything was sunshine and rainbows. It wasn’t. It was weird being disconnected from my phone.

The strangeness bubbled up in ways you can’t even imagine until it happens to you. For example, that was the first time in years I had no idea what time it was. Not like I could ask my fellow concert goers, they lost their phones too. I was completely cut off from the outside world. All that mattered was what was happening in that room. For just a couple hours, that was my entire universe. Oddly, there was comfort in that.

I also realized that when the devices are away, you have to do other things to pass the time. You can’t scroll through Instagram or fake check your emails.

You actually have to talk to people.

I talked to so many strangers that night. I made friends, shared stories, and connected with other fans. That’s what these events are all about. It’s one of the coolest things about live music. A concert is one of the very few times you and everyone else in the room share a common interest. Take advantage of that. That’s prime opportunity to make some friends.

This is where the boomer portion of this article kicks in, but this is what we need right now. We need to talk to other human beings, and make those connections. Because if you are constantly online, it’s easy to become a hateful person. When you constantly hear bad news and dystopian headlines, you start to believe that’s how the world works. It’s not good for you. We’re not meant to handle constant information all the time. So when you go out into the world, and interact with real people, you realize not everyone is evil. There is still good out there, you just have to go find it.

Here’s the point everyone was waiting on. When the show finally started, everyone was in the moment. It was incredible to see. Everyone was sat on the floor and in complete awe.

Yes, that’s right. The venue made everyone sit on the floor. The irony of making a bunch of twenty-somethings sit criss cross applesauce like a class of kindergarteners was not lost on me. It was poetic that Phoebe Bridgers stripped us of everything and took us back to our roots. Class was very much in session.

Everyone locked onto her as soon as she stepped out. It was dumbfounding to look out into this crowd. I saw people crying, friends swaying with each other, fans clinging onto every word she spoke. What I didn’t see, was a single screen.

There was something in that room, you could feel it in the air. There’s something powerful in having a room be silent like that while a performer takes a stage. She had everyone wrapped around her finger. I always appreciate an artist that has a commanding presence. Especially when it’s a woman. I won’t lie, I love a lady with authority.

After the show, Phoebe met with everyone who wanted to meet her. Meaning, if you were in the building, you were guaranteed a chance to speak with her. Once again, the no phones rule was still in full force. Fans weren’t upset though, in fact it was the opposite. People were talking to her and she was talking to them. There was zero pressure to take pictures and prove that it existed.

Somewhere along the line, we started thinking we need to justify our existence. We have to take pictures of everything or it doesn’t exist. We feel the need to prove to the world that we’re out doing things.

You don’t need those things, though. Sure, it’s cool. Although, I argue, isn’t it more special to have a chance to say something truly meaningful to an artist you love? Rather than just snapping a picture and moving on?

Point is, you don’t need pictures or videos to show that something was real. If it happened, it exists. If you experienced it, it’s real to you. That’s enough. And nothing can take that from you, even if you don’t post it on Instagram.

i went to heater rivalry night. i also happened to vlog the entire thing. check it out here: https://youtu.be/zBsIyQiBgZ8?si=BdCKIjklFGDIoyOn

ok so everyone is posting reviews for this so what’s one more. here’s my review for wuthering heights as someone who has never seen the movie:

happy valentine’s day! to celebrate the love today, let’s talk about some of the best love stories of all time. here’s why historical romance is better:

more simone weil and twenty one pilots content! the most work i’ve ever done for a video, as far as research, reading, analyzing and note taking. i found some really interesting stuff, things i haven’t seen anyone else talk about. 👀

thank you for the memories, catherine. rest easy ❤️

trying to analyze more things than just music lately. and sometimes that means i’m over analyzing hairy wolf women.

here’s my latest video on that: