hoh

ʚ TSUKISHIMA ɞ ── the one who was too late

you take a step back from him soon after you learn about his relationship. he doesn’t notice at first. how could he? he has his sights on someone else, someone more significant. someone who had the confidence to confess to him at least. yeah, he knew about your little crush on him. but being that you were going to do nothing about it, he shouldn’t pretend to care either. so why was the lack of you bothering him so much? he starts looking for you around the halls, maybe near your locker or talking to a classmate. but it appears as though you completely disappeared. were your schedules so incompatible that you made an extra effort to see him? he should’ve noticed that you were showing you cared, albeit no words were said. he comes to the conclusion that he was the coward, the one lacking the confidence to tell you how much he appreciated you. he gives the girl an apologetic frown to the girl he’d been seeing who waves him off with a smile saying, i thought i sensed something between you two. go to her. so he does.

ʚ KUROO ɞ ── the ex

he scrolls through his own feed, a feeling of phoniness rising through him. the kuroo in the pictures are smiles galore, an exact reflection of the girl beside him in those pictures. but as more time passed, he realizes just how hard he was working to keep a facade up. how did one coffee date become a relationship? sure at the time he thought no harm of it, the two of you were on a break anyway, but now that it’s escalated to something much greater than something casual, the thought of your reaction has been plaguing his mind. he remembers how understanding you were, how hopeful you looked encouraging to take the time he needed while you waited. so there he goes…and then does this? god, he can’t even look at himself. but he has to make it right. which is why he comes clean about everything to the girl he’s currently seeing and then makes his way over to your place, this time with a sense of purpose. he took a break to find what he needed. but time away made him realize that what he needed all along was you.

ʚ ATSUMU ɞ ── the used one

it doesn’t hit him at first. it isn’t until he starts to realize the little things about his day have changed; he waits at his locker for that big smile he grew to adore, he searches through the stands of the volleyball stadium for those bright eyes, yet he doesn’t see them anymore. why should he? you were in his life for one reason only and now that your job was done, he shouldn’t be expecting those sights… when you hear about the breakup, you’re shocked, to say the least. you both put so much effort in making the girl notice him and they didn’t even work out? so now not only did it cause your heartbreak, but it was also a waste of time? your question is answered after class when before you can leave, the door is closed shut in front of you. from behind you, atsumu mentally thanks suna for aiding him in his plan. it’s been a while, he says, signature smirk finding its way on his face but one look at his clammy hands shows he’s more nervous than anything. you spin around to face the boy and wait for his next words. can we talk?

ʚ OSAMU ɞ ── the rebound

the cycle soon begins again…the distrust, constant frustration and arguments. it isn’t until he shouts y/n would’ve never done this! that he realizes just how badly he fucked up. so with a final goodbye, – he reiterates final because he’s sure he’ll never fall into the same empty void again – he leaves his former ex girlfriend and walks straight to your apartment. he doesn’t expect you to take him back, why should you? he treated you like you meant nothing after everything you’ve gone through… but it never hurt to try. so that’s why he’s kneeling at the foot of your door, begging for everything you had to forgive him. he’s sorry and you know it. he spews out numerous apologies and with a heavy heart, you invite him inside for some coffee.

ʚ BOKUTO ɞ ── the matchmaker

your stomach twists at the grin bokuto sports when you ask him to meet you at the diner after his practice. you’re sure it’s a platonic smile, how could it not be? the plan was simple, get the two to meet unknowingly, without you, and just watch their story unfold. you could scoff at the hallmark-ness of the situation. as the evening passes, you’re stuck in your room, nervously biting your nails as a dreaded feeling fills your stomach. if things go as planned, your friend will have a boyfriend…god, why can’t you feel happy for her? the next day comes and you’re still in mystery about what happened the night prior since your friend never messaged you like she said she would. you greet her in school and with a sad smile, she motions over to the captain on the other side of the hallway. he’s got something to tell you, she says and laughs when you stare in worry. don’t worry, i kind of figured it out…i’ll be fine. full of confusion, you walk over to bokuto and at your appearance, he sends a wary smile. y/n, you got a second?

ʚ AKAASHI ɞ── the second choice

awh, i’m sorry i was paired with someone else already, your friend says sadly when akaashi asked to be her partner for a project. you and y/n can be partners! you avoid his glance because you’re far too tired to see the look of disappointment that probably flashed in his eyes. akaashi agrees to be your partner and the two of you meet in the library for the next few days. it’d been a while since he spoke directly to you and he can’t help but feel bad. how come he never realized how smart and caring you were sooner? he finds himself gazing at you as you nervously chew your lip, deep concentration written on your face as you work and looking over at you in class during lessons. he mentions hanging out with you more often following your project and with a stiff nod, you accept. he’s observant though and asks about your look of discomfort. and then there you are, admitting your inferiority complex when standing next to your best friend and akaashi feels his heart sink. i’m sorry if i ever made you feel that way. you’re worth way more than that and i’d like to show you that, if you’d let me.

ʚ DAICHI ɞ ── the friendzoned

he can’t help but feel that there’s something wrong. you’re not as active while participating in conversations with him; you give mere head nods with a smile never reaching your eyes. he doesn’t know what’d wrong until sugawara has to break the news to him. she likes you, you dummy. i think she’s giving up on her feelings for you so that’s why she’s keeping her distance. the words echo in his mind for the following few days, guilt building up in his stomach. was he really blind to your feelings for him? he sure liked using the friend card on you and never did it occur to him that it probably hurt to hear those words again and again. now that he knows, though, he can’t seem to fight the blush on his face. he was never aware when someone liked him so you being his first? what did you even like about him? was he sweating? did he look weird? god, how weird you suddenly made him feel. it isn’t until one day you ask him if he’s alright because he’s looking rather…constipated, that he blurts out you’re making me feel weird! you open and close your mouth a few times, looking away so he can’t see the disappointment in your eyes. wait, wait, that’s not what i meant. i meant it like, looking at you makes me feel weird? no, that’s not right either. look, suga told me you liked me and since then, i also might feel something for you.

ʚ KAGEYAMA ɞ── the neighbor

you’re kidding, you think with a frown. why did today out of all be the day your mother invites the neighbors for a meal? so, kageyama ends up in the seat in front of you, fiddling with his utensils and avoiding all eye contact with you. yep, it’s awkward because it’s been so long. your mothers gush about how much the two of you have grown since you were little and take a trip down memory lane, spewing whatever childhood stories of you both that they can remember. by the end of dinner while you and him wash the dishes, most of the tension seemed to subside. so girlfriend, huh? you can’t help but blurt. kageyama profusely shakes his head. nah, nah, that didn’t work out… he mumbles, looking back up. you? with a scoff, you shake your head. kageyama rubs the back of his neck, pausing from drying the dishes. it’s really nice to see you, by the way. maybe we could see each other more often?

ʚ SAKUSA ɞ ── the rival

bokuto koutaro

bokuto likes to give his best at whatever he does, loving is no different. he goes all out like usual. he spoils you with a huge bouquet of someone else’s favorite flowers, so extravagant that you could hide behind it if you tried. the way you hide behind his past lover’s identity. he brings home what he swears is your favorite food after extended hours of practice to make up for lost time. and you swallow it down the way you swallow your pride every day when he mistakes you for someone else. you don’t have the heart nor the guts to say you don’t really eat that. he surprises you with gifts saying “i remember you’ve always wanted to have this, so i got it for you!” but you don’t have it in you to tell him it’s no surprise how he got it wrong again. “no, koutaro,” you wanted to say. “i’ve only ever wanted you to love me the way i do,” you think in your head but you can’t will yourself to voice it out. you fiddle with the ring and its excessively large diamond. he mistakes your tears from that of joy and pulls you in his arms.

miya atsumu

atsumu absolutely sucks at taking care of himself even though he’s an athlete and needs to be in tiptop shape at all times. but he swears he does a better job at taking care of you. he rhythmically treats you like royalty every few weeks or so. he goes out of his way to make sure your fridge and pantry is filled with more junk food than there are healthy options. copious offers of bubble baths and cuddles and back rubs and playing with your hair. when he changes the sheets you assume he’s just being tidy for a change. when the bathroom is stocked with enough pads to bleed yourself to death twice you assume it’s better to be safe than sorry. you don’t assume, you pretend not to notice that your period ended two weeks ago and the reminders he had set on his phone were for someone else and he never got around deleting them. when he tediously picks blueberries out of your food you assume—no, you pretend not to know you’re not the one allergic to them. “you take such good care of people, atsumu.” you mean it with all your heart. he just doesn’t take care of you.

suna rintaro

suna thinks he sucks at expressing his feelings just because he can’t find the words to say, but he doesn’t know he’s pretty good at showing them through little things. he sends you memes and jokes at the ungodliest hours and you laugh. the punchline is that he keeps sending inside jokes he shared with someone else and you couldn’t feel any more stupid than when you try to understand them. he shares his earphones with you every chance he gets and plays the same playlist with all your favorite songs. he hums to the tune and half-expects you to sing along but it doesn’t occur to him that you don’t know the words, you’ve never even heard of it before. he drops off a few hoodies at your place before away games so you don’t miss him too much, that’s what he says. he even sprays your favorite perfume of his so you feel like he’s right there beside you. you get a whiff and you could have sworn you told him you like the other scent better. you’ve never felt so far away from him as you did then. the distance couldn’t be traveled by bus or foot or even when he went home after the games because it's the kind that sets your heart apart. he thinks he sucks at expressing his feelings, but he lets you know just fine that you are the farthest thing in his mind all the time.

sakusa kiyoomi

“I’m in love with you kuroo.” you whispered finally. 

you watched as kuroo shook his head softly before turning around and muttering a string of curse words. as every second passed, you could feel your heart shriveling up in your chest. 

but that was nothing compared to what he would say next. 

“y/n...I just can’t.” he breathed, “you’re my best friend. you know what you mean to me, but I just, not like that—” 

“I-I got it.” you quickly interjected. not that you actually did, but you knew you wouldn’t be able to handle the rest if he kept talking. 

giving him a tight smile, you got up from the edge of his bed and grabbed your bag. 

“I think I’m going to go.” you whispered, choking back a sob as you ran out the door. 

✰ ✰ ✰

you hadn’t talked to kuroo in a week since you had confessed. kuroo knew you needed space so he didn’t contact you for the first couple days, but after that he started to get worried. after all, you were still his best-friend and even if he wasn’t in love with you, he still cared about you a lot. 

hearing a knock on your door, you got up from the couch with a groan and made your way to the front door. 

opening the door, your eyes fell on a soaking kuroo who stood there with a sheepish smile on his face. without a second thought, you quickly ushered him inside before running into the house and coming back with a towel. 

“you idiot.” you muttered softly, every thought of never wanting to see him again flying out the door he came in, “why didn’t you bring an umbrella?” 

“it was only drizzling so I didn’t think I'd need it.” he admitted with a shrug before taking the towel from you. 

you waited till he was dry before asking him with a sigh, “what are you doing here kuroo?” 

frowning, he moved closer towards you before enveloping his hands into yours. his thumb rubbed the top of your hand softly, a habit he always had, a habit that you fell in love with. 

but now it made you flinch as you quickly pulled your hand back to yourself, “j-just talk to me.” 

surprise filled his eyes but he continued, “listen, I know last time we didn’t end things on a good note but I just want to talk things through y/n. I still care about you, a lot.” 

you nodded. you knew you had to be mature about this one day or the other. when you fell in love with kuroo, you couldn’t deny that you were afraid of confessing to him for this very reason. before loving him, he was your best-friend. and you couldn’t lose that. 

“okay, let’s talk then.” 

✰ ✰ ✰

several years passed after you confessed your love to kuroo. while things were awkward at first, you tried your best to get over him while he tried to set some boundaries between the two of you to make sure you weren’t uncomfortable. 

the both of you were at a college party when you met a certain someone that was sure to make your life a little more interesting. 

reaching for the last strawberry-flavored drink, another hand beat you to it, swiping the drink up. turning around with a glare ready, you saw a blonde boy staring down at you with a soft smirk on his face. 

“sorry, this is the only flavor I like.”

“that’s not my problem. I was here first.” you retorted back, motioning for him to hand it back to you. 

chuckling, he said, “no problem. you can have it if you can reach it.” 

just then he lifted it high above his head, which happened to be a good couple feet above you. 

you raised your brow in amusement, “didn’t realize we were back in middle school. a little immature, don’t you think?” 

giving you a half shrug, the smirk only grew on his face as he continued to taunt the can above your head. 

rolling your eyes, you knew exactly what he wanted to see but you weren’t going to give him any of that. returning back the very shrug he gave you, you simply walked over to him before letting your hand rest on his chest. 

blinking at you in surprise, the boy’s breath hitched as you lifted your head up so that you were only a couple inches away from his lips. 

“hey,” you whispered, “how about instead of all this, we just share, hmm?” you drawled softly, letting your finger slowly trail up his chest. 

while you were playing an act, you couldn’t help but feel your face flush especially when this said boy looked a little bit too attractive and had a nicer body than you anticipated. 

but you weren’t one to back down. you let your hand fully wrap itself around his neck as you moved in closer. 

“I—” he started to say when suddenly he felt his arm being pulled down and next thing he knew, his hand that once held the last can was now empty. 

watching as you pulled yourself away from him, you stepped back before waving the can in his face, grinning from ear to ear. 

“thanks for my drink!” you teased as you turned around and started to make your way back to your friends when—

“hey wait!” he called, catching your attention. 

looking back, you cocked a brow at him, ready to send another sarcastic comment until you saw a genuine smile spread across his face. his eyes sparkled as he looked at you, causing your heart to suddenly beat faster in your chest. 

“I'm atsumu, miya atsumu! ” he added before giving you what seemed like a hopeful look. 

instead you replied with a soft chuckle, “nice to meet you atsumu, I'll see you around!”

✰ ✰ ✰

a couple days passed and it was finally the start of the new semester. you were sitting in your first class of the day as you pulled out your laptop, waiting for everyone to roll in and have the professor start when an all-too-familiar voice spoke up beside you. 

“hey miss no name.” 

jumping in slight surprise, you looked to your right just to see a familiar mop of blonde hair enter your vision. 

“a-atsumu?” 

dropping his backpack to the ground, he sat down beside you before shooting you a smug smile, “the one and only.” 

the initial surprise on your face wore off and was slowly replaced by amusement (and also nervousness cause shit he happened to look even better than he did in the dark). 

the next couple minutes went by much more smoother than you expected. despite the fact this was only the second time you saw him, you couldn’t deny feeling a certain comfort around him. whether it was the way his eyes gazed at you with every word you spoke, or the lingering smile, but you knew that this wouldn’t be the last of him anytime soon. 

✰ ✰ ✰

“so, how’d that test go?” kuroo asked, almost instantly causing you to groan. 

“kuroo please, I’m trying to forget that even happened.” you groaned, thinking back to the chemistry test you took yesterday that you knew for sure you bombed. 

grinning, he replied, “you do know I'm a chemistry major right? you could’ve asked me for some help with studying dummy.” 

"I know I know.” you said, shaking him off with your hand, “I ended up studying with a friend from class because like you, he’s surprisingly good at chemistry and equally annoying about it too.” 

quirking his brow at that, he was about to ask you who that was when the both of you turned around at the sound of your name. 

“Y/N!!!” 

“speak of the devil.” you muttered under your breath, but Kuroo didn’t miss the way a smile tugged at the corners of your lips as you rolled your eyes at a figure that made its way towards the both of you. 

“can you refrain from screaming my name across the campus, please?” you scowled at him. 

atsumu grinned back before replying, “Nope, I need to let everyone know that I know the ever-so beautiful Y/N.” 

eyes widening, a blush quickly filled your cheeks, “You—” as you hit his shoulder. 

turning to kuroo, you motioned towards atsumu before saying, “kuroo this is atsumu. he’s in my chemistry class. atsumu, this is kuroo. he’s my best-friend from high school.” 

atsumu turned his attention towards kuroo who had already been staring intently at the male since his arrival. clearing his throat, kuroo gave the blonde a nod, “it’s nice to meet you.” 

smiling back, atsumu said, “you too,” before looking at you and adding with a wink, “didn’t know I was competing with a childhood best-friend.” 

for the second time that day, you punched atsumu as a string of curse words left your mouth, “oh my god stop saying shit like that you idiot.” 

kuroo felt his chest tighten as he watched the both of you bicker back and forth (aka flirt) in front of him. it was clear in almost every single way how the two of you felt about each other that anybody would’ve been able to tell in a matter of seconds. averting his gaze elsewhere, an odd sensation coursed through his veins, one he never felt before when it came to you. 

fists tightening at his sides, he couldn’t help but think only one thing at that moment. 

that used to be him. 

✰ ✰ ✰

and it could have been him. if only he wasn’t such an idiot all those years back. 

he watched as tears of joy streamed down your face as you covered your mouth  in utter surprise. 

it felt like the world slowed down for him at that moment. every single movement appeared in front of him felt like a stab to his already broken heart. 

you nodding yes. atsumu slipping the ring onto your finger. you grabbing his cheeks as you pulled him into a kiss. atsumu twirling you around before. all of your friends erupting into cheers around you. 

all except for him. 

osamu ft. kita | soulmate! au 

it was the middle of the night when you felt that sudden sting on your wrist that had you crying out to your parents. you remember them rushing to your side just to have warm smiles on their faces when they saw it appear, the mark of your soulmate. fast forward several years later and you were now in college and while many of your friends had found their soulmates, you were in a very different position. the most unfortunate position. you remember the day you first saw him. you knew in that very moment that this would be a feeling you would never forget. a memory that would both fill your heart to the brim just for it to turn cold and shatter it in seconds. "osamu! this is y/n, y/n this is my twin osamu!" atsumu introduced excitedly, a grin plastered across his face. however the both of you were frozen. you didn't know what made you so bold, but there you were grabbing the wrist of a stranger, no your soulmate, and flipping it to see the very mark that matched your own: a sun. "y-you're my soulmate..." you whispered in a mix of surprise and disbelief, suddenly hitting you as the words escaped your mouth into existence. looking back up at him, your eyes twinkled with joy. you found him. you finally found him. "holy shit." atsumu whispered in complete shock while osamu simply stared at you, lips pressed together in a tight line, his eyes void of any emotion. almost as if he...wasn't happy. suddenly he snatched his hand from yours, pulling his wrist close to his chest as if your touch had burned him. 

“no. I'm not looking for a soulmate.” 

your eyes widened in surprise until slowly the horror of his words dawned on you. 

“o-osamu! what are you saying—?” you heard atsumu start to which his twin simply glared at him. 

“you knew this atsumu. we’ve been over this, I don’t want a soulmate.” he said coldly before letting his eyes fall back on you. 

your eyes had welled up before you could even realize, your heart that had been racing just seconds ago felt abnormally slow, almost as if it was fighting to beat, to keep you alive. 

“I'm sorry.” he simply said before turning back on his heels and walking out the cafe doors, leaving you standing there with your world crumbling in a matter of simple minutes. 

☼ ☼ ☼

after that day, you felt lost. you had tried talking to osamu again, and again, and again, asking for an explanation, asking for a chance, asking for anything. but much to your avail, he had rejected you each time, giving you no reason, nothing. 

so in the end you proposed him one final thing.

“can we at least be friends?” you whispered tiredly. 

osamu’s eyes widened in slight surprise. after weeks of you asking osamu for a variety of things, this was something he didn’t expect. 

“what do you mean?”

you chuckled humorlessly. looking up at him, osamu could see that the twinkle in your eye was almost gone. all because of him. 

“have you heard of platonic soulmates, osamu?” you responded softly. 

he nodded slowly, still unsure where you were going with this. 

you took in a shaky breath, gathering every last bit of strength in you before you finally plastered a weak smile on your face. pushing your hand out, you said, “hi. I’m y/n, and from today I’ll be your platonic soulmate, a friend.” 

☼ ☼ ☼

several months passed and slowly, osamu opened up to you, as a friend. never did either of you cross that boundary. no matter how much your wrist tingled whenever you came close to him, no matter how much you could feel yourself falling harder and harder each day, for your soulmate who wanted nothing to do with love. 

you had heard stories of soulmates that didn’t end up together, after all the universe wasn't perfect. while you never knew you would be one of them, it gave you slight reassurance that there was hope. that maybe one day you’d be able to move on and find someone else who would love you. 

for you that day came a lot sooner than you imagined. 

“I am so sorry!” 

standing in there in absolute horror, you watched the coffee stain spread across your white blouse. 

“I—” you started slowly when he ruffled through his book bag before suddenly thrusting some paper napkins into your hands. 

“please use this, I’m so terribly sorry. I didn’t see where I was going and this is completely my fault.” 

looking up slowly, your eyes grew wide as a boy with silver hair filled your vision. you didn’t know whether it was the way his warm but apologetic eyes softened when they met your gaze, or whether it was his face that seemed to slightly glow despite the deep flush in his cheeks from embarrassment, but it was something because suddenly you couldn’t look away. 

you must have been staring at him for a while because he waved his hand in front of you, motioning for you take the napkins. 

blinking, you nodding slowly as you dabbed the coffee from yourself as much as you could but there was no chance the stain across your shirt would go away anytime soon. 

“shit, I have a presentation today...” you whispered softly as you stared down at yourself in pity, knowing you had no other choice but to go like this since there was no time for you to change and get back in time. 

just then, the boy before you quickly removed the cardigan he was wearing. 

“please take this!” he said, pushing the cardigan towards you.  

bewildered by his sudden actions, you shook your head, “what, no! it’s fine! I know you didn’t mean to—” 

“yes, but I would feel horrible having you walk around with that because of me. please wear this to cover it up.” he repeated, desperation laced in his voice. 

so you took it from him, his eyes watching you as you pulled it over you. while it was slightly too big for you, it did the job, the coffee stain neatly tucked behind the blue knit fabric. 

“thank you,” you finally whispered with a small smile, looking back to meet his gaze. 

“no please don’t thank me, I don’t deserve that.” he shook his hands, chuckling awkwardly. 

bidding each other an awkward but still warm goodbye, you had only made it a a couple feet away before you turned around, a sudden unidentifiable giddiness filling up your chest with every passing second. 

“hey! what’s your name?” 

turning around, his lips melted into a soft smile, “kita. kita shinsuke.” 

☼ ☼ ☼

kita shinsuke. the man who came into your life like an accident started to feel more like the universe had an interesting way of playing fate. as several months passed after your encounter with him, you only came across him more. first he was in two of your classes the following semester, then he became your co-worker at the same coffee shop. before you knew it, the two of you became close and something more than friendship began to blossom between you both. 

you remember the day when kita told you about his soulmate. 

holding his wrist out to you, your fingers grazed softly over his mark, a full moon. except, it was fading. 

a fading mark was an indication that one’s soulmate had passed away. kita told you he remembered when he first noticed it back in high school. his wrist had been hurting for weeks, sharp pains every now and then until they suddenly stopped. and it was then he saw the moon on his wrist that used to brightly gleam now began to fade. 

“I-I’m so sorry.” you whispered softly, your heart breaking in your chest for the boy who sat beside you. kita deserved the world, no he deserved the universe for he was the kindest, most genuine person you had ever met in your entire life. it was unfair that this would happen to him, of all people. 

shaking his head, he gently covered your hand with his, “hey, it’s okay, it’s not your fault. after all, I hope they are happy now and not in pain. that’s all that matters to me.” 

it was then you told him about yourself. outside of osamu and atsumu knowing, you hadn’t confided in anyone about this. you didn’t want them to pity you, to see them look at you with those eyes as you told them that your soulmate said he would never love you. 

but kita didn’t. instead, he pulled you into his arms and let you cry softly against his chest, whispering things to you that made you feel like you worth something. 

days later and kita asked you to be his. he told you how he felt and that you didn’t have to reciprocate, after all you still had a soulmate and if you wanted to try to win his love he would never judge you for it. he told you to take your time and let him know, and no matter what he would still be there for you. 

but you didn’t need time. the universe may have given you a soulmate, but it didn’t mean it gave you the right one. kita always felt like the right one. and now you knew it for sure. 

☼ ☼ ☼

osamu watched the two of you from a distance. you were laughing at something kita said while he looked at you in complete adoration, his eyes filled with love as you spoke to him about something osamu couldn’t hear from where he was. 

he felt his wrist throb. 

pulling up his sleeve, he massaged the spot where his mark was, in hopes of easing the pain. but the more he did, the more it stung. 

looking back up, he suddenly locked eyes with you. he watched as your brows furrowed in confusion until recognition set in. before osamu could do anything, you were already making your way towards him and pulling kita along. 

“osamu! what are you doing here?” you asked casually, a wide smile resting on your face. 

osamu frowned. he never saw you smile like that since he knew you. and for some reason, he felt his heart flutter in his chest as you continued to stare at him with that smile. 

“osamu? hellooo, earth to osamu?” you giggled, waving your hand in his face. 

clearing his throat, he quickly replied, “I-uh was just heading to my next class.” 

“ohh, gotcha.” you nodded. turning to your side, you gestured towards kita, “this is kita, he’s my boyfriend.” you added softly. 

as the word “boyfriend” left your mouth, you felt a sudden anxiousness fill ever inch of your body as you looked cautiously at your soulmate. 

just then osamu smiled brightly at the both of you before holding his hand out to kita, “it’s nice to meet you. she’s been talking about you a lot.” 

at that, you felt all the nerves ease before hitting him playfully on the shoulder, “hey you can’t just expose me like that.” 

kita laughed softly in amusement, “it’s nice to meet you too, and please tell me more.” 

the three of you walked together in conversation till you reached where osamu’s class, before bidding him a goodbye and making your separate ways. osamu watched as you both turned around while kita slipped his fingers through yours,  pulling you close to his side as you walked away. 

osamu felt the throbbing feeling return, yet this time it wasn't his wrist. pressing his hand to his chest, he felt a pain like no other in his heart. taking in a heavy breath, he tried his hardest to look away but he couldn’t, not when you were shining as bright as the sun.  

a sun that was no longer his. 

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bokuto koutaro

bokuto likes to give his best at whatever he does, loving is no different. he goes all out like usual. he spoils you with a huge bouquet of someone else’s favorite flowers, so extravagant that you could hide behind it if you tried. the way you hide behind his past lover’s identity. he brings home what he swears is your favorite food after extended hours of practice to make up for lost time. and you swallow it down the way you swallow your pride every day when he mistakes you for someone else. you don’t have the heart nor the guts to say you don’t really eat that. he surprises you with gifts saying “i remember you’ve always wanted to have this, so i got it for you!” but you don’t have it in you to tell him it’s no surprise how he got it wrong again. “no, koutaro,” you wanted to say. “i’ve only ever wanted you to love me the way i do,” you think in your head but you can’t will yourself to voice it out. you fiddle with the ring and its excessively large diamond. he mistakes your tears from that of joy and pulls you in his arms.

miya atsumu

atsumu absolutely sucks at taking care of himself even though he’s an athlete and needs to be in tiptop shape at all times. but he swears he does a better job at taking care of you. he rhythmically treats you like royalty every few weeks or so. he goes out of his way to make sure your fridge and pantry is filled with more junk food than there are healthy options. copious offers of bubble baths and cuddles and back rubs and playing with your hair. when he changes the sheets you assume he’s just being tidy for a change. when the bathroom is stocked with enough pads to bleed yourself to death twice you assume it’s better to be safe than sorry. you don’t assume, you pretend not to notice that your period ended two weeks ago and the reminders he had set on his phone were for someone else and he never got around deleting them. when he tediously picks blueberries out of your food you assume—no, you pretend not to know you’re not the one allergic to them. “you take such good care of people, atsumu.” you mean it with all your heart. he just doesn’t take care of you.

suna rintaro

suna thinks he sucks at expressing his feelings just because he can’t find the words to say, but he doesn’t know he’s pretty good at showing them through little things. he sends you memes and jokes at the ungodliest hours and you laugh. the punchline is that he keeps sending inside jokes he shared with someone else and you couldn’t feel any more stupid than when you try to understand them. he shares his earphones with you every chance he gets and plays the same playlist with all your favorite songs. he hums to the tune and half-expects you to sing along but it doesn’t occur to him that you don’t know the words, you’ve never even heard of it before. he drops off a few hoodies at your place before away games so you don’t miss him too much, that’s what he says. he even sprays your favorite perfume of his so you feel like he’s right there beside you. you get a whiff and you could have sworn you told him you like the other scent better. you’ve never felt so far away from him as you did then. the distance couldn’t be traveled by bus or foot or even when he went home after the games because it's the kind that sets your heart apart. he thinks he sucks at expressing his feelings, but he lets you know just fine that you are the farthest thing in his mind all the time.

sakusa kiyoomi