𝒊𝒏𝒕𝒐 𝒕𝒉𝒆 𝒅𝒂𝒓𝒌

💗   𝐕𝐀𝐋𝐄𝐍𝐓𝐈𝐍𝐄'𝐒  𝐖𝐄𝐄𝐊  𝐏𝐑𝐎𝐌𝐏𝐓𝐒

chill   breeze   hits   him   as   soon   as   he   opens   the   door,   nose   scrunching   as   he   adjusts   to   the   weather,   inhaling   quick   breaths   for   a   moment   before   he   manages   to   gather   himself.   it   wasn't   usually   like   this   —   overwhelming   —   to   be   around   isla's   family.   saved   for   a   couple   months   that   followed   their   break   up   and   the   few   arguments   with   milo,   the   glances   coming   her   parents   held   a   glimpse   of   care   that   he   didn't   deserve   anymore.   and   then   again   the   moment   he   stepped   out   of   rehab,   welcoming   him   with   open   arms   despite   everything   he   had   put   her,   and   them,   by   proxy,   through.   she   was   kind   enough   to   allow   him   back   into   her   life   and   they   followed.   no   wariness   expressed   for   him   to   see. spending   time   with   them   was   a   given   from   the   moment   they   started   dating,   many   years   ago.   isla   was   close   with   her   parents   in   a   way   he   couldn't   understand,   not   because   they   didn't   deserve   it   but   because   he   had   never   experienced   it,   or   witnessed.   sure,   there   were   parts   of   the   sykes'   routine   that   matched   his   own   at   home.   the   family   dinners,   the   house   packed   for   christmas'   eve   and   the   big   birthday   parties.   but   they   were   never   quite   the   same.   he   had   never   seen   isla's   mom   walk   back   to   her   room   with   her   head   down   after   her   dad   had   a   few   too   many   drinks.   things   were   different   at   her   house.   their   parties   were   just   as   loud,   but   for   different   reasons.   their   christmas'   tree   was   filled   with   presents,   but   things   they   actually   bought   for   each   other   and   not   picked   from   some   magazine's   list   of   most   purchased   toys   for   kids.   they   were   warm,   even   if   one   of   their   favorite   family   tradition   was   to   be   stuck   in   a   cabin   in   aspen   during   the   holidays. he   doesn't   have   to   look   up   to   know   who's   walking   into   the   balcony   as   he   hears   the   door   sliding   again,   face   softening   before   he   searches   her   eyes.   an   apologetic   look   reaches   his   face,   followed   by   a   deep   exhale   he   can't   contain.   he   knew   she'd   follow,   just   as   he   knew   their   presence   would   be   noticed   by   everyone   else.   and   he   hated   it.   putting   a   damp   on   their   celebrations,   even   if   he   knew   they'd   go   out   of   their   way   to   assure   him   he   wasn't   doing   it.   theo   slides   to   the   side   on   the   couch,   opening   up   space   for   isla   and   wrapping   his   arm   around   her   body   as   soon   as   she's   close   enough.   "   i'll   go   back   in   a   bit,   i   promise.   i'm   fine   "   and   he   was,   or   he   would   be.   a   few   minutes   of   silence   was   all   he   needed,   a   few   minutes   to   reorganize   his   thought   and   remind   himself   where   he   was   and   how   he   got   there   —   and   all   the   other   seven   steps   his   therapist   had   walked   him   through   so   many   times.

  silence   sits   between   them   for   a   beat   and   he   can   feel   worry   radiating   off   of   her   body,   even   as   she   attempts   to   hide   it   by   burying   her   head   against   his   neck.   "   nothing   happened,   it's   just—   "   his   voice   crack   and   he   hates   it,   even   more   now.   his   attempt   to   assure   her   fails   before   he   even   starts.   he's   back   at   start   before   he   tries   again,   quick   breaths   as   arm   falls   down   from   her   shoulder   to   reach   for   her   hand,   intertwining   their   fingers   and   tucking   them   safely   into   the   pocket   of   his   jacket.   "   i'm   really   glad   your   christmas'   eve   looks   like   that   "   he   whispers,   ignoring   the   pressure   that   grows   behind   his   eyes.   "   it   means   our   kids   will   have   that   someday   "   there's   a   hint   of   a   grin   that   grows   across   his   face   with   the   thought,   of   their   family   having   something   nicer   than   what   he   was   given.   "   i   don't   think   i   ever   had   both   of   my   parents   home   for   christmas,   unless   we   were   spending   with   some   other   family   "   and   even   then,   they   would   still   find   ways   to   ignore   him.   "   this   is   nice,   i   promise   "   overwhelming,   but   definitely   nice.   a   type   of   happiness   he   would   have   to   get   used   to.

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Melissa Barrera as Laura Franco YOUR MONSTER (2024) dir. Caroline Lindy