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Obsession asks the question of โman or bear but what if Bear is actually a man and youโre stuck in your own mind as youโre coerced into loving the man and getting raped by him because heโs just a niceeeeeee guy pookie whoโs too scared to confess to you and get friendzoned. Wouldnโt that be fucked up?โ
obsession was great. the themes are especially great when viewed thru a feminist lens. i think you could even go so far as to view it as a metaphor for reactive abuse (the way bear makes a wish for nikki to love him more than anything in the world / be obsessed with him, then lets everyone believe sheโs just gone crazy put of nowhere, all while still not wanting to end his relationship with her. of course itโs not one to one but the subtle themes are there.)
i also enjoyed how the film showed what everyday violations of consent can look likeโฆmedia often shows the most obvious, often-dramatized occurrences of it, but this depicted a more common way of it showing up.
bear did indeed take advantage of nikki while she was in a mentally unstable state. he was well aware her consent was compromised. all the while he is very insecure about it, knows what he is doing, becomes aware even that nikki is aware and it is hurting her, continues doing it. i love that this film names this. it even critiques โnot like the other girlsโ anti-feminism through sarah, who sees it as nikki taking advantage of bearโฆthen she ironically tries to take advantage of bearโs vulnerable state herself by coming onto him.
also on a smaller note nikkiโs batshit incestuous gorey hansel and gretel story had great prose i enjoyed it. my partner pointed out that before the wish, nikki saw bear as a little brother figure. meaning the hansel and gretel thing very well could have come from real feelings of disgust, like it nearly feels like an incestuous relationship to her.
and the ENDING. a lesser film would have insisted that, in these circumstances where the wish can only be broken if one of them dies, the male lead must survive between the two. but there was no self sacrifice from nikki out of โloveโ, there was no moment of lucidity or jealousy or rage where she kills herself, bear is forced by the narrative to take full responsibility for what he has done to nikki. whatโs moreโ he reaches for a gun, almost uses it, ultimately decides on overdosing on pills. my partner and i personally think this was intentional commentary on masculinity, by having bear consider, then reject, the way men typically choose suicide in favor of the way women typically choose it. just a fun detail and maybe weโre both batshit.
good movie. all of that said though iโm sure a lot of people will boil it down to โhaha women are soooo crazyโฆโ
the fact bear only tried to cancel his wish after being told he couldnโt alter it (and, seemingly, because he was uncertain about how real nikkiโs love actually was) - instead of wanting to do that from the start, as soon as it was clear that something was wrong with nikki - makes me so, so devastated for her. itโs clear he was more concerned with what he was getting out of the wish, rather than the detrimental effect it was having. and like, everyone could tell something was up with nikki, itโs not as if it wasnโt clear. him hanging up the phone as soon as nikki is out on the line (screaming) is so symbolic of how he is completely ignoring how he is ruining her life throughout the film
I think the thing that is the most disturbing to me about Obsession is just how quickly it becomes totally clear that Bear not only never loved Nikki, but that he never even liked her.
In the little time we spend with Nikki before she becomes possessed โfreakyโ Nikki, Obsession goes to great lengths to establish Nikki as a person.
In just the first 15 minutes of the film, we learn that Nikki loves writing, sheโs laid back, and that she cares very deeply for others. We see that sheโs funny, she likes to gently tease her friends and joke around. She has ambition and wants to pursue her writing seriously. She has her own goals and thoughts and opinions.
Sheโs also characterized very well by her wardrobe, how she talks, her body language and expressions (courtesy of Inde Navarretteโs absolutely STUNNING and brilliant performance).
In a VERY short amount of time, the audience is given a VERY clear picture of Nikkiโs personality and usual behavior.
Which makes her โtransitionโ into โFreakyโ Nikki all the more horrific when Bear makes his wish.
Because even if we give Bear some grace, and acknowledge that he couldnโt have known that the One Wish Willow would do what it did, and even if we treat his kissing her on the first night she comes over as morally grey (although in my opinion he absolutely did take advantage of the fragile mental state he believed her to be in), there is no way to excuse Bear blatantly ignoring that Nikki changes so drastically from the person Bear claims to be in love with.
After the wish, Nikki starts speaking differently and using a higher pitched voice, she starts dressing completely differently and wearing more traditionally โfeminineโ clothing. She suddenly drops her plan to quit working at the music store and pursue writing, she stops showing any care towards her other friends and the people in her life. She defers to Bear in every situation, with the only exception being any time Bear shows any sign of moving away from her emotionally (or physically).
After the wish, Nikki becomes a completely different person.
And Bear does not care or show any concern regarding this at all.
Everything that makes Nikki who she is, everything that makes Nikki, Nikki, is just gone after Bear uses the One Wish Willow.
And Bear couldnโt be happier.
We get a whole montage of Bear and โNikkiโ as a โhappy coupleโ hanging out together and ignoring everyone around them.
Itโs not until Bear starts seeing actual consequences to his wish, such as โNikkiโ causing a scene on their date or feeding his dead cat to him, that he begins to worry about her behavior.
And even thenโEVEN THEN!!!!โBear STILL adamantly refuses to accept that Nikki is not behaving rationally or how she used to in any way. While he eventually acquiesces to canceling his wish, he first tries to just โalterโ it to make it so Nikki still loves him, but is just less intense.
He would rather use โNikkiโ to satisfy his own desires and ego.
If Bear loved Nikki, hell, if he even just LIKED her for who she is, he would be horrified by โfreakyโ Nikki. He would have recognized and acknowledge extremely early on in their relationship, that something was deeply wrong. He would know that the woman he was with was not Nikki.
But Bear would rather have a bootleg version of Nikki that he can feel validated by, than have an actual relationship of any kind with the real Nikki.
He does not love Nikki. He does not even like her.
He likes the idea of Nikki. He likes the image of Nikki that heโs constructed of her, the image of her that only exists in his head.
He likes the fantasy of what Nikki would provide to him emotionally and physically.
From the beginning of the film, Obsession shows us exactly who its villain is. Nothing that โFreakyโ Nikki does horrifies me as much as Bearโs treatment of Nikki and his refusal to see her as an actual person with autonomy.
For me thatโs the most disturbing element of Obsession. That the people you trust the most and care about may be so obsessed with the version of you theyโve created in their mind that theyโll actively ignore your personhood and autonomy.
God. Obsession is so fucking good. I love film. I love cinema. Thank you Inde Navarrette. Thank you Curry Barker. Film of the year, if god hates horror fans why do we keep winning.
One thing that really stuck with me and proved that he does not even know Nikki is that Ian is the one who questions if she was using MD again. Bear did not know about it. Ian, and then Sarah, question it when Bear says Nikki is acting strangely because she's upset her father has cancer. Their immediate response was "the father she hates and doesn't talk to?" but Bear never questioned it. When Nikki tells him about her dad, he doesn't ask when they started talking again. Did he even know she had a bad relationship with her father?
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i absolutely love how nikki is nearly always bathed in shadow (whether itโs fully in the dark or with a single light behind her with her as the faceless darkness). sheโs quite literally become a shadow of her former self. no autonomy, no personal thoughts or emotions, just a carved image of what bear desired.
I genuinely appreciate how obsession doesn't try to frame bear as morally grey but just fully leans into how deplorable he is. a lesser movie would have tried to give him redeeming moments along the way but no, at every single crossroads bear makes the wrong choice. when the customer service rep asks him if he wants to cancel his wish, he says no, and asks to alter it. when nikki, the real one, begs him to kill her, he asks her "if it would be so bad to love him", and right at the end, backs out of killing himself and tries to throw the pills up. he is the villain, not another victim, not a confused, cowardly boy, the villain.
thinking about how when you experience a lot of shame in your formative years (indirectly, directly, as abuse or just as an extant part of your environment) it becomes really difficult to be perceived by other people in general. the mere concept of someone watching me do anything, whether it's a totally normal activity or something unfamiliar of embarrassing, whether I'm working in an excel spreadsheet or being horny on main, it just makes my skin crawl and my brain turn to static because I cannot convince myself that it's okay to be seen and experienced. because to exist is to be ashamed and embarrassed of myself, whether I'm failing at something or not, because my instinctive reaction to anyone commenting on ANYTHING I'm doing is to crawl into a hole and die. it's such a bizarre and dehumanizing feeling to just not be able to exist without constantly thinking about how you are being Perceived. ceaseless watcher give me a god damn break.
on my second viewing of obsession, i had the realization that nikkiโs story at the party wasnโt the movie using incest as an easy shorthand for making the audience uncomfortable or creating a general โthings are offโ vibe but was another way the real nikki was crying outโa metaphor for the fact that nikki, like gretel, is being made to fuck her โlittle brotherโ (bear) under duress, at the behest of an external magic (the witchโs spell in her story; obviously, bearโs wish)
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if i think too hard about nikkiโs experience in Obsession i feel physically ill. imagine one second youโre just walking up to your house after a night out, and then the next, youโre looking out of your own body, but youโre not longer in control. youโre a prisoner to a terrible, unnatural version of yourself that only exists because of a choice someone else made. when you scream, nobody listens. when you claw your way out for long enough to explain that this isnโt you, nobody listens. when you beg the man who trapped you in this situation to put and end to it, to set your free, he just. doesnโt. listen. and then when you do finally regain control, all your friends are dead, and you are covered in their blood. because of a choice someone else made
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