graphene fiend.

      [★] Dandy stood there, sunken eyes staring back at his unwanted guest. Fervently scanning every single detail of the intruder’s ill-gotten gains, while the ire resonating deep within tightened into his chest. Morsels of crumbs spewing out of his mouth as he spoke, a trickle of pineapple juice slithering down his chin, and an incriminating amount of vanilla frosting smeared over his garments. Caught in the act and all he could do was feign his innocence with an insincere grin – where, oh, where was the shame?!

      There were no words left for the hunter to speak. As much as he wanted to chew into this thief with as much piss and vinegar that he could lace into his verbiage, he couldn’t will his lips to move. Rather, choosing to exhale deeply before lowering his head in defeat. Though not willing to disclose it, there was a measure of empathy that he felt for the hapless stranger. Quick to understand that if the shoe were on the other foot, desperation would’ve likely lead him in the same path. Nodding in acceptance, Dandy would turn on his heel to head back to his bedroom, allowing Ling to finish his desse–

      “ THINK FAST, SHIT-HEEL! “

      Swiftly without the least bit of hesitation, Dandy unsheathed his trusty equalizer from the inside of his varsity jacket. Pressing harshly down on the trigger, as its wave-like particle beam spiraled out of the gun’s tip, maneuvering in its destructive path towards the yankii’s mark. Maliciously grinning in anticipation of the demise of this dirty, no good, cake stealing knuckledragger!

            *BOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOM!*

        … only to miss completely, leaving a crater-sized hole in his kitchen.

    “ Uhhhh… whoops! I mean… t-totally meant to do that! That’s what we sharpshooters like to call a warning shot! Honest! But… but just for clarity’s sake, ya’think you could do me a favor and inch a little bit closer to the left? My left, not yours. Right over there where my toaster oven used to be. Thanks! “

     Normally, the prince’s first reflex would be to draw from his martial prowess and do like... a cool flip out of the way or something. But the way this man aimed what had almost looked like a children’s toy suggested the trajectory was nowhere near the spot he had been occupying.

     And so, sitting perfectly still with a blank stare of incredulity on his serpentine features, Ling had just allowed the oaf to shoot with no indication he’d felt intimidated in the slightest.

     When the shot was squeezed off, and the dust had settled, the only reaction to the ruckus the half-Homunculi’s face portrayed was surprise that Dandy’s...

     Well, if he knew what a cereal box prize was, Ling would have described it as that---That Dandy’s Cracker Jack trinket had managed to fire at all.

          “Huh...” Admiring the crater left in the middle of the man’s appliances, Ling placed himself in the line of fire, a hand plastered to his chin in wonderment of the power that thing could kick out. A swivel on his hips, and he’d turned to face the yankee once more. “Here good? Or are ya done makin’ a fool of yourself? The cake’s gonna get all hard on us if we keep standing here making a mountain out of a molehill.”

     His affect was entirely blasé, ridiculous events compounding upon each other until the situation was farther out of hand than he’d expected a simple cake thievery to go. What Ling would soon come to consider the cherry on top would be the reaction of the bounty hunter’s housemates---Simple fists against the walls, shouts commanding silence. He’d even heard a shout of ‘Put your goddamn laser gun away already, jackass! No one was impressed the first fourty fucking times!’ come from where he’d surmised to be next door to the east.

          “No,” A light breath was pulled into the Homunculi’s chest, the ghost of a smile playing at the corners of his drawn lips. Brows taut with an effort to keep a neutral expression, a pair of crimson irises resettled themselves upon the icy woman’s cold gaze. “Didn’t seem like you were the type who would.”

     Sure, it was seedier than what the little prince may have been used to, and sure, the stench of grim and disrepair burned at their nostrils with every breath... But for the homounculous, the lower floors were the closest to his heart’s home he could imagine.

     A couple weeks of exploring the hundreds of tiers Greed had been able to access with his status of a newcomer, he’d settled himself into a sort of residency within the 100 to 50 range. A sweet-spot of debauchery and corruption, but without too much sacrifice of the worldly technology the locals seemed so reliant upon. His need to venture back to his housing was only as present as the second strongest soul within him’s control---With no need for sleep, and a rare need to eat, he’d passed his time in a veritable land of plenty.

     Women, drugs, men, weapons, drunks and addicts looking to be humbled---With the absence of Father, a sacred purpose, and his annoying ‘siblings’, this place had become a playground. If he weren’t such a covetous bastard, then perhaps it wouldn’t’ve bothered him to have his Ultimate Shield stripped away.

     No matter, he’d regain his trump card in time.

     Presently, he’d been troubled.  He’d noticed their body growing lethargic in the past handful of days, and an abdominal region stricken with borborygmi. ‘Hunger’, as Ling had explained it. He had no desire to waste his precious attention span on something as tedious as eating, being Greed rather than Gluttony after all. He supposed he’d allow his backseat driver the reigns of their shared body, if only to save himself the tedium.

     As his consciousness came to the forefront, Ling Yao reflected on his vastly different proclivities. How Greed hadn’t seemed to notice or become bothered by the irritation in their sinuses was beyond him. Such squalor was a reason he’d wished to become the Emperor of Xing in the first place... There were good, kind people here living in filth without a way to elevate themselves, and all they’d need to do is look upwards to see just how much healthier those above their caste were able to live. When he’d been given the reigns, he’d felt it was his duty to improve the life of those he came across in any small way he could manage. They weren’t his subjects, but they didn’t need to be---A good, kind leader seeks to make the world around him better. His country is just the start.

     When his thoughts had concluded about the subject, as if by cue, a call to action presented itself in the form of a young woman, not much older than himself.

     Her shouts of displeasure were audible, but at his distance, unintelligible. Her tone sounded short and distressed, her permed pigtails bobbing with the effort of her dispatch from the resident who’d dared to hassle her. The bass of his voice reached his ears more clearly; shouts and curses, accusing the young girl of being an outsider.

     With a placid expression on his face, the prince’s marital arts prowess made itself apparent by way of two boots to her assailant’s face shortly before he’d been able to make contact with a palm to her own. It was as if he’d dropped from the sky, an angel meant for the sole purpose of her rescue. The man crumpled to the gritty concrete as his consciousness floated from his eyes.

   GIVE THIS POST A ❤ ❤ ❤ IF IT’S ALRIGHT FOR ME TO:

contact you about an rp!

write you a non-event starter at any time!

send you ask memes!

turn your ask meme responses into new threads!

though for some, this kind of thing is a no brainer–but i can be shy sometimes. this sort of affirmation can really help me talk with people!  (´・ω・｀) 

GREEDLING.

fullmetal alchemist

(slightly different voice) fullmetal alchemist

two career shitheads for the price of one

usually greed’s in charge though so expect him more often than not

joth

wants it all, including your SO

chaotic hungry

good afternyan, everynyan! the name’s cléo and i’m here at isola for the first time!!

some of you (presumably very few) might remember me from my spotty presence at citta between it’s inception and some time around 2016 when i withdrew from groups altogether. i was the charlotte (fe: fates) to ramona’s dandy most notably! if you do recognize me, hello! if you don’t, hello all the same! i look forward to meeting you!

here’s a few fast facts about me that should help us along to great plots and fun threads!

i’m an old lady so i’d really prefer not to rp with muns who are minors! minor muses are fine, though!

i’m... an exceptionally wordy bitch. i really love long threads full of emotion and introspection.

and on that note, i love plotted threads! if we have a plot in mind or a direction to strive for in our character’s development, i’m more likely to respond fasterer and betterer.

unplotted is always fine, too.

i love writing angst and gore the most, but i have a huge soft spot for shippy stuff.

i’ve got no triggers so nothing’s off limits plot-wise aside from the usual taboos, but they’re against group rules anyway!

greed is bisexual and polyam, so if your muse is interested, let me know and something could likely happen there...

as for ling? We’re Just Not Sure. anything could happen with good enough chemistry, but he’ll be monogamous.

nothing too intimate can happen though -- their body is only 15.

i have some serious health problems i’m working through right now, so my activity here might be a little sporadic. i’m reliably reached on my twitter, but you can send me asks and ims any time you’d like! (my twitter is here, follow reqs ok!)

part of those health problems include my eyesight, so please be mindful of your formatting when threading with me! any text smaller than this is difficult for me to read.