âyouâre not the only ones.â the universe is at peace these days, but it doesnât stop the worry in the back of finnâs head. itâll be a little easier to breathe when sheâs back with them. itâs hard to stop the worry the past few years have fermented. in the past, when one of them have been gone, heâs had to wonder whether or not they were going to come back. thatâs the realities of war for you.Â
it just doesnât feel right without rey and bb-8 around.Â
finn feels his heart drop to his stomach, or his feet: he loses track of it somewhere as it plummets. she did. he clears his throat, pushes off the doorway heâs leaning on. for a moment, the look in his eyes is bright despite the mismatched, somewhat tentative expression on the rest of his face. âa whole company, poe! a whole company defected. lived out there.âÂ
heâd thought he was the only one. not because he thought he thought he was the only person to have doubts, to put down the blaster, but how many stormtroopers would have had the chance to follow through? how many avoided being reconditioned, actually escaped? how many stormtroopers had a resistance pilot with them the same moment theyâd decided to defect?Â
he finds an extra crate not too far from poe and sits down on it. it takes him a moment to meet poeâs eyes, and by the time he has, the electricity has dropped from his own.Â
âyou think i should?âÂ
poe hadnât trusted jannah at first, in the initial few moments --- after all, kef bir wasnât exactly a welcoming moon and they werenât there for reasons he wanted to share. theyâd had so many false starts, already; so many near-alliances that crumbled in the face of the first orderâs might. it felt like a miracle when jannah and the rest of company 77 just up and helped them, no questions asked.Â
and then again, all over, finding out where they came from, that finn wasnât the only one who got away--- not the only one who made it out long after childhood, after a ship couldâve been intercepted carrying kids. not the only trooper to see the wrong in what theyâd been forced into. poe grins, bright and wide --- finnâs excitement is contagious, layers on top of poeâs own joy at finding someone else, anyone, some proof that the first order wasnât winning every single battle they fought.Â
it has poe leaning forward as finn sits down near him, reaching for finnâs hand and covering it with his own. poeâd never be so arrogant as to tell finn what he should do --- when they met, finn had nothing put his convictions and plan to escape, and that was more than enough for poe. finnâs always been enough, more than enough, just as he is.Â
but the thought of him having family out there, missing a child, a sibling--- the thought that he might find his homeworld, that it might be good for him... poe could never deny finn that. where the energy has fallen a little from finnâs eyes, poe picks it up, squeezes finnâs hand. âif you want to --- finn, you deserve to know where you came from, if thatâs what you want.âÂ
poe almost makes a joke: who knows, maybe youâre secretly royalty--- but they both saw what the past can do. what it nearly did to rey. poeâd just as easily get it if finn didnât want anything to do with where he came from. âwhat do you think?â