Hallo I'm Jynx. Welcome to Hell F27 sofiagray.com/?rel=618031 Code 10% off Gothicc666 Ich bin nicht gut fĂźr dich. Listen I'm weird as hell. Oh well. I like odd things and don't care what you think of it. If you like it good. Message me if you'd like just nothing stupid. I'm taken and not looking. But willing to sell pictures or anything inbetween! $GoddessJynx Have fun in in the Dark Abyss...
Idk if anyone will see this, but right now I need just anyone to tell me I'm not crazy.
Am I a bad friend for wanting to hang out with my ex-bestie (eb for short) while she has her kids or she's busy and can't hang, so I offer to come over, to help watch, to help clean? Anything just to be there for her, why? Oh because she was on her third child, at this time I literally went over to her house to play dnd with her husband and brother and her sometimes. So I would try and say "hi" or talk, but instead we stayed doing something else or barely said hi. Ok, fine, hormones, got it. It got to the point of she wouldn't want to hang out with me for reasons she stopped telling me decent sounding excuses. Fine, That's fine, I have other friends who I can hang with or find other things to stay inside and not get out of the house to do. I don't need to leave the house, to get away from the suffocating inside the house with a mentally and verbally abusive, controlling husband. That's. Just. Fine.
So you know, time goes on. we find out that the reason she won't hang out with me, but will hang out with the other girl who she hates (Mind you the other chick literally broke into their house, tried to start drama all the time, and be hazardous to her already two children But who am I to judge about the person you rant to me about how you hate them so much?) But the other chick was also pregnant after divorcing her wife. It's honestly such a mess. So "anyways, I get excluded now because I "Don't understand what she's going through" or "I won't have the same experience" or I'm "not a good source of help" Lol, Okay? I still can't help? Be happy for you? Cool. So things go on, and just things have gotten worse on my end. I'm over here with such a mind debilitating baby fever, that I'm having to pull my car over watching children get off the school bus because I'm in such a crying fit that I can't breathe or see straight. So who the hell would I go to about what do I do? My Bestie right? (There's a reason we are eb rn) I tell her, well try, Idk how much she actually listened. But I tell her how I just can't think about anything else right now. I did everything right, and the world keeps slapping me back.
I own a 4 bedroom house. we have two cars, we even have decently everything working out in our favor, But all of a sudden, I'm not good enough for anyone. My own husband two months after getting married said he hasn't found me attractive for the last two years. THAnks. That's a real boost. This didn't start the fights, but that's a whole other set of rants. about a year before my eb got pregnant, around or right before July 4th, I strictly remember, I was in the walmart fucking bathroom. I had felt so sick the weeks beforehand. Like, My menstrual cycle hates me. She's savage af. Not to mention she likes to disappear randomly and appear with just cramps or a whole flood. I never know. But I remember calling my husband in a panic because I don't know what to do while I had to go to the bathroom so bad it hurt, and all I have is half dollar sized clots. Just something my medical brain, and senior year of AP biology says, "Fuck!" I have him figure something out because I'm really needing someone to just hold me in the bathroom I feel so sick to my stomach. I'm dizzy and all these symptoms I tell him to tell the doctor or whoever he calls.. So he calls, they say whatever to him. I don't either remember or he never told me what they said, (this is a normal of hiding information from me, A LOT) They said (What he told me) to just wipe things up and clean up then if it persists in the next 24 hours to go into the hospital. But I will have to see an ob-gyn.
So, Okay. Nothing bad. but they are in charge of everything along those lines. But those were including two words, that I now know were the two words this man didn't want to hear despite, DESPITE all the teasing and jokes about having kids with me when I was younger with him and literally just dating. That was because I had to see a family planning doctor. I was told by HIM that it was nothing, and we will be fine. I just blamed it on my cramps that are horrible and never put thought to it because I had believed that's what he was told. So that's a trauma my brain locked away until recently as I'm going through my divorce right now. But, I was thinking about how shortly after that, I got a call from my eb about how they were all waiting on me because I'm making us late for bringing stuff to the grill out and bonfire later. Fine, mask all the pain and keep fucking going. right?
She seemed genuinely not worried, saying it was probably just a bad cycle. She gets them all the time too. Its whatever. My now bestie's sister has gone through the same thing I described multiple times, enough that she looked at me and was like, "No, You possibly miscarried." even her mom went on about, "they should've never NEVER brushed that off like they did. If they cared then they would've made sure you were ok. My husband denied me from going to the doctor to see anything about it. Even after when I knew my hormones and emotions were just soooo off. But that's in my mind now, when before maybe around the same time my eb came out saying to all of us even her own husband one time saying she's been feeling crummy because she went in and she found out she had miscarried. It was so short after my stuff that she disregarded then took and made attention for herself that upset her own husband because she never told him until she told a bunch of us at a bar. I mean I felt bad for her, but Now thinking back, my gut says it was a ploy to make her husband to feel bad for her and to try for another one. Where as I'm over here waiting patiently because I jumped through Hoops to get where I'm at now.
My husband promised me children. Lots, its a fucking dream to be a mum. I care for everyone else, and their kids, why not have some kind of mini me to show of what I did. That I did good. That I can be useful to this world too. That I'm not just a lump of no good nothing to this world. But first, he needed a better paying job than a gas station.
Did that, he worked at a metal parts production place. But we then gave the fact that we still live in the apartment I got after moving out from high school. We rented a house. It worked, and it was nice. But now he needs a car, but he cant do that until he learns how to drive. 3 years older than me and I taught him how to drive. AND I helped him buy his first car, a truck. Oh but now, we still can't start a family. We are only renting. I have enough good credit that I could get a house alone, but I needed a higher pay. Bam with his income together we got a house.
Bam, I'm hit with baby fever and what not. NOW I get told, we aren't ready for anything like that yet, so wait two years. Alright, I'll wait. I can do that. We were going to go on trips together and do many things together and all of a sudden, the walmart thing happened, and it just got worse from there. It got to a point I got a job paying BETTER than him and I was the laughing stock to him and his buddies. THANKS. But I'm fine, everything is fine. The walmart thing was about two years after, so I mean, it was actually in the time frame and whatnot. Things just kept going on getting worse at home, I just kept listening. For reasons, I had to quit my high paying job, and then everything got absolutely horrible at home. Had to put everything I had control over money wise into his account for he worried it would take too long to find an new job and make money to suffice for bills. It was argument after argument, but I went to my eb explaining things, asking what the hell do I do? Her advice? To just do what he wants. The thing I had to quit about? She basically never cared about it. Everything just went on being a mess. I went on just letting people walk over me because that was the advice I was given.
I voiced my feelings that I have been following lies and how I feel hurt that I'm told dreams and having them be taken away. We never went on trips much. Instead we would buy a crap ton of ammo or new guns that I'm not allowed to use, yet I'm helping fund so you can get them, but when it was my own that I BOUGHT, all of a sudden, my things went missing and he would be out using and letting his buddies use my new guns and using up the ammo I had purchased on my own. I mean, fine, but let me at LEAST take yours out if you're going to use mine without asking. It got to be so annoying that we would be asked when we would get married or when we would have kids. He would be hugging me and smiling all cocky saying "Oh well we haven't stopped trying." every time. He would start that tell people this and I finally had enough. I stopped him and told him to put his money where his mouth was. He always said shit but never actually did it or acted on what he said. He would just lie to everyone. Tell people lies because it sounded nice. Best part? I had bought a ring for him. I proposed to him because he would joke about things like that. So I basically said, "bet" and did it. I have never received a damn ring! He wouldn't even want to look at them with me. Because they were expensive. Not all of them are. I don't care what price it is, but something to say, "Hey, I love you and Don't want the odd peeps at the bar to keep hitting on you so take this with you, its dangerous out there." (Shut up. I'm a nerd) But like.... I just would make notions about, I wanted a ring. He would beg me to pool together money and buy new guns, I mean I"m not against, but I would bring up that I will want a ring. Or even something else would be you know, amazing right now because I'm in a lost place wanting kids still and my eb just announced they were having their third. (which her own family was so upset about it that they ranted to me and my mom, her own brother said that its just another kid that they will end up taking care of instead of her so she can go to the bars again. Yep) So next we talked about getting a gun safe because, before we can have kids, we need to be SAFE. Ight, we bought it. Nice matte black 33 capacity, fire and water proof, best part the front had a reallly pretty engraved waving American flag imprinted on it. It was just so smooth. (Guess who has that right now btw) So oddly enough in the middle of me not being enough for my eb, My cycle kind of returned to being semi regular, and all of a sudden disappeared. Well that whole month beforehand we went from never wanting to touch me unless it was my birthday to every night he was angry after work and took it out on me instead. I mean, whatever. But when it came to me not feeling well, I told him.
Instantly it wasn't mine. I was fooling with other guys. Like instant psycho. His childhood friend came and moved up with us, she saw this for a good few months and had to move out because he was trying to control her as if she were a child. She told me that it was not right for him to be that way and that she will never talk to him for how he treated her. (which was exactly how he was always with me too) I'm not sure if he was trying to get my jealous because his bff was a girl? Idk we worked out like literally sisters. Sooo much in common and she told me, She believes he's never wanted kids. And she watched how I broke down after he told me he wanted nothing to do with me until I took a test. He DEMANDED that I took a test right away. If it was positive, it wasn't his until proven so. And if it was negative he would be fine. this was ridiculous. He wasn't at all happy or excited. Purely upset. I felt so shitty that after the test was negative I told him and he threatened about it happening again he was leaving back to Kansas. He threatened this every damn fight, it got to the point that I gave up, I said leave then. And instantly he shut up. I got him out of gangs, crime, jail, living on the street or with his mum, and being a maaajor drug addict. Yet I'M THE BAD PERSON.
Back to recently when my eb is getting closer to having her kid, I just go through finding out I'm not and my husband is freaking out at me, nonstop yelling at me that I'm not good enough and all this shit. Yes, lil ol me trying to keep the peace in the house is a cunt and a whore. Wow. Name calling, but hitting where it hurts? I told him before, how my mother in an argument said I would be a horrible mother. And that shit sticks. IT STICKS. So what does the smart ass pull out? He repeats it. He says he's glad I'm not pregnant because I'd be a horrible mother in the end.
That. That just kills a person. That kills dreams and the feeling of wanting to keep living. Who the FUCK says that to their partner? Am I wrong for thinking that's not right? Well my eb thought I was. I told her my feelings. How I don't want to be jealous of her, but I am. That she's more beautiful, she's always had guys hitting on her in school inviting her to do things and hang out, I was the nerd in whatever class that got invited only if it was mandatory. She will be having three kids and a loving husband that can never take his hands or eyes from her, where as I have to act like a clown to get my husband to look up from his damn phone. To say something nice. To
be acknowledged while in the house. I've left and came back the next morning because I hung out at my now besties house. He didn't say a word until I came home the next morning and he looked at me like "when the fuck did you leave" No care, no love. I was stuck being a burden. Anything I ever did around the house was in vain. Everything I helped with I got shoved away because I didn't do it right. EVERYTHING I did was not good enough. I would tell him this that is how I felt and he would deny it. One day, I caught him yelling at me saying that what I did wasn't ever good enough. Calle him out right away. Bitch... He tried to change the wording to go around what he said. I HEARD IT. it was so bad I had to have my bestie on the phone to listen to how he talked to me behind closed doors. Away from public view. HER MOM HEARD IT. Thought she was watching some kind of dramatic show, until she realized it was me on the phone. She's listened to so many calls its unheard of. There was a day, I had enough of it. (Ok A lot actually) but I grabbed my laptop and my charger and left the house. I sat in the park drawing on my laptop. Texted every person I could think of that I cared so deeply for that they would care for me back. I was in a dark ass place asking for Advice. My eb shrugged off what my husband was doing and scolded me for leaving. For sitting in a park drawing out my feelings instead of being with him because he's being dramatic to her husband upset that I started an argument. I didn't understand what I started when it was over me telling him not to throw the controller when he loses a COD game because that's how it breaks. Why he threw it? Because I distracted him by playing with my cat while he was playing the damn game and made him lose! yep. Exactly that. So I was yelled at to quit. So I did. I went back to my drawing and then with my headphones on I was humming to my music. It distracted him and he lost. So I flipped out because I can't do anything in my own house without being scolded for it. So I stormed off to the bedroom to draw some more. I'm upstairs and away from him. Didn't want to eat now I'm stressed and upset. So I didn't cook anything and now he's hungry and upset at me for not making food yet. YES. That's how it started and I again was the bad person in the story for safely removing myself from an environment where all my mind was telling me to do was dark things that hurt to say. To give up on everything I have worked for and all my dreams.
That was the last time I spoke to her for a while because everything started to be only about baby and about doing this for baby. Doing that for baby. But then she would never answer me back. I was done trying to fit time to hang out. To do something, I made new friends who didn't have kids and hung out more with them. It got horrible. the sound of a child crying made my stomach hurt. I had non stop dreams of the same thing happening. It was just awful. I looked it up and it was just meaning I had something and lost it. Whatever is missing in the dream what what I had lost.
In this dream I was dressed in all black, lace and long dress covering every inch of skin on my body. I had a hat with a veil and I was rocking a bundle in my arms in an old decrepit room with peeling paint and broken toys. It was a nursery. An old ruined nursery. I was rocking just a black blanket swaddled with a hole that emptied to the void. It gives me chills, I get this dream so much that me explaining just makes my skin crawl and my body ache. It hurts to think of but I just cannot understand it. Makes sense now that I looked into it.
But me going through all of this, I can't talk to my husband about my feelings because I'm too needy and being selfish for not taking his feelings into an account. That he's not ready that we are not ready and that I'm not ready because I'm going to be a horrible mom. Cool.
I have tried so much. I couldn't be around kids. It made me so sick and I jus would have to find somewhere to hide and cry for hours. I would cry myself to sleep. Never getting comfort by him because I'm throwing a pity party. I was so hurt. Still am. I'm broken hearted. Thinking that if I had a kid, at least I would have something that needed me and would love the care I gave and would love me back. I wanted to feel loved for how much I put out in the world. I wanted to have something to ground me to this world before I did something stupid. I was in such a dark place that I drove an hour to go see my bestie because I was scared that I was going to do it. That I was going to be the big disappointment he told me I would always be. Three months later, baby is here and I go back to playing dnd with my friends and its at their house. My husband is rubbing it in my face. He's holding baby and talking to baby and doing all these things making my mind break. He asks if I want to hold her. If i if iififififi NO.
I can't I cannot. I'm trying to be respectful. I missed out on other games because I had to hype myself up. I procrastinated because I didn't know how I would be or if I could handle it. I got to the point that my eb's husband told me that he doesn't want me playing anymore because I sent a text trying to apologize to my now eb that I feel so bad but I can't see her right now since seeing her kids just sends me into a panic attack and I can't stop thinking horrible things. So she takes that as I have a problem with HER kids and not just the KIDS situation. Doesn't hear me out. blames me for everything and has me banned from coming over. in which her husband says he doesn't want me over anymore. Which my rebuttal is because she's telling him only. But he said it was his choice. I don't know don't care. It just hurt that THATS the reason I got kicked out. Not because I was good, but that I couldn't handle their kids. And I would not pay attention by drawing the whole time. I was distracting myself because I'm trying to drown out the noises of cooing making my gut rot and my mouth dry. So by all means I'm selfish for wanting a dream that I was being promised for the last 6 years of physically being with my soon to be ex. I've know for actually 12 years. And that I drove 15 hours to bring you to me since you couldn't drive.
So I need to know from real parents, was I out of line for telling my eb that I had feelings and that them not being heard or just cast to the side hurt? Am I crazy for feeling that I've been robbed? For being upset when my husband comes home drunk and abuses me? For being hurt when I'm called all sorts of names and told I'm worthless by the man I should trust the most? Please. I need to know.
I know I'm ranting, but I need to get it out. I need to find some sort of something to figure out why I'm feeling this way, or why I don't know what to do with myself anymore. I'm fighting for the divorce since i haven't been to my owned house in the last 5 months since he changed the locks on me. I moved an hour away from my home and my family and still to this day, I hurt to hear or watch children around me. I'm happy, but inside something aches and just feels empty. Not to mention that I got told by people that know me that he's been caught buying condoms. We are still technically married, and he can't be doing those things right now. Am I jealous? Upset? Hurt? All of the above? It just sucks and I'm drowning in debt a bit trying to work my ass off to get where I want in life again since all of everything has been ripped from me. I'm trying. Please let me know if I'm crazy or out of line? I want to be heard. I'm going to start to save up. I have a plan for my 27th birthday. If it doesn't work in time for my 28th birthday, I'm not sure what else I can do but join the 27 club.
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â a collection of blurbs that take place within the âreturn to senderâ universe and after the events of âin contemptâ .á
â READ âRETURN TO SENDERâ HERE [ 1 ]
â READ âIN CONTEMPTâ HERE [ 2 ]
⤡ NOTE : blurbs intended to be read chronologically âĄ
soft!simon | ŕź wedding ring | ŕź mornings | ŕź rules | ŕź kink-sploration | ŕź taking care of you | ŕź taking care of him | ŕź blowjob | ŕź facesitting | ŕź mr. possessive | ŕź marriage | ŕź shelly | ŕź hormones | ŕź full circle/how it started
You tried to move on, but no one quite measures up; not to the way he touched you, not to the way he ruined you. But when he reappears, you can feel him even before you see him. The past has a way of punishing disobedience, and now, itâs here to settle the score.
âď¸ SEQUEL TO: â RETURN TO SENDER â | AO3 . MLIST
18+ AU, fem!reader, takes place in the UK, porn with plot, pathetic!reader, harddom!simon, soft!simon, cuckolding, stalking, dirty talk, implied voyeurism, extreme exhibitionism, praise, rough sex w aftercare!, breeding kink if you squint, smidge of degradation, unprotected sex, cream-pie, oral sex (f!recieving) fingering, squirting
[ 16.6k words ]
Fuck Simon for vanishing, for leaving you with nothing but a ÂŁ21.90-shaped hole in your wallet.
Itâs humiliating, reallyâhow twenty quid can leave such a deep dent in your otherwise empty pockets. But the alternative? A fate you couldn't afford to entertainâsleepless nights, baby-screeching, endless tears, and a lifetime tethered to a man who couldn't even be bothered to stick around longer than 5 minutes after fucking your brains out, taking your favorite pair of oversized sweatpants on his way out, too. So, you swallowed the morning-after pill and kept it moving.
The immediate days after he disappeared blur together in a heavy, sluggish haze. You still show up to work, still plaster on a smile that doesnât quite reach your eyesâthough it never did, even before Simon. Every shift is the same bullshit but somehow worseâcustomers testing your patience, coworkers draining the last bit of energy youâve got, and a boss who somehow manages to be more insufferable than the rest combined, multiplied by ten, then squared.
Your life was shit before, but thatâs all been exacerbated. Nothing feels right anymore. You donât remember who you were before him, how you managed without his touch. Everythingâs off-kilter, like the world shifted just enough to make moving through it a little harder.
You try to shove him out of your mind, slam the door, bolt it shutâfor your sake. But when one door closes, a window inevitably opensâand he is the draft that seeps through, whistling through the gaps, curling around you and filling your lungs, regardless of how hard you try to shut him out.
The rational part of your brain tries, with dire urgency, to tell you that it was just sex; that it wasnât supposed to mean anything. You made an offerâarguably reckless, maybe even stupid, but not regrettableâand he accepted. Weird, but simple. Clean. Done.
But even as you rationalize and deny his effect on your life, your body betrays you. It still remembers whether you want it to or notâthe phantom heat of his massive hands branding your skin, the weight of him pressing you down into your creaky mattress, the primality of being wrecked, ripped apart, and haphazardly stitched back together.
Itâs hard to fight the way your body cravesâthe pang buried deep in your bones, in your cunt, gnawing at you like a plague. It wears you down, sanding away every hard edge you put up against the hunger for him. Eventually, you stop trying. Stop pretending.
After a week, you begin to cling to the news channels like they hold your salvation, listening like their reports are scriptures to damned ears. You sit on the scratchy, cheap carpet in your living room, bathed in the cold, artificial glow of the screen nearly every night, waiting like a dog at the door for an owner who isnât coming home. You watch until your eyes dry, stinging as you blink, your fingers twitching around a carton of pad thai, stomach a tangled knot as you swallow each bite. Every time that breaking news banner slashes across the screen, your pulse spikes, breath snagsâthinking: this is it. This is the moment his name finally breaks through the LEDs.
But it never comes. You envy how they can swallow it all down and forget him.
Heâs gone. Not only from your life, but seemingly from existence itself. No reports. No shitty CCTV footage of him. No murmured speculations from tight-lipped officials. The world moved on within a couple of days as if they were paid to not to speak his name. As if speaking his name would plague them with the shadow of him as well.Â
Days turn into a week, a week turns to two.
A fortnight, two weeks on the day since it all happened, and still, you canât let go. The less you hear, the more you need him. The obsession burrows deeper, twisting its roots around your ribs like weeds, pulling tighter with every breathâsuffocating, consuming.
Then come the dreams.
The first time you see his eyes in your sleep, you wake in disarrayâyour sheets tangled, your hair tousled and your skin sweaty. The imprint of him lingers, burned into the backs of your eyelids, in the goosebumps on your neck.
You can't deal with it anymore.Â
You canât cope with the way he haunts you. Itâs cruel, really, how he lives up to his name. How heâs gone, yet has never truly left.
You download the BBC app and turn on notifications. Each alert is a spark, a fleeting moment where your breath catches in your throat, where your heart stutters against your ribs. You cling to the possibility, to the thought that maybe this time, there will be somethingâsome sliver of information, some sign that he still exists in the world beyond your memories.
Every vibration, every chime sets you on edge. Your fingers twitch, your stomach knots. You find yourself unlocking your phone without thinking, scanning headlines with eagerness that borders on despondency. You tell yourself itâs just curiosity. Playing detective. But deep down, you know better.
You need him.
Itâs pathetic, really, the way your mind latches onto every news clip, every report, dissecting vague mentions of overseas conflicts, covert operations, missing operatives. You read between the lines, searching for somethingâanythingâthat could be him. A shadow of a man. A ghost in the margins.
You probably look like an addict going through withdrawalsâwaiting, itching, restless.Â
In a way, you are. You couldnât get enough.
The second you feel the faint buzz in your pocket, your breath hitches, your pulse kicks up. Your fingers twitch before you even register the movement, scrambling for your back pocket, ripping your phone out like itâll tell you exactly where he is, what heâs doing, when heâs coming back. But it never does.
You keep watching. Waiting. Because something must surface eventually. Because if you stopâif you let the remnants of him settleâit makes him real in the past tense. And you canât stomach that. Not yet.
Notifications pile up as you go to work, then come home, go to work, then come homeârinse and repeat. War, corruption, scandal, catastropheâbut never him. Instead, you choke on the taste of useless knowledge, drowning in politics you couldnât care less for, memorizing names of leaders who mean nothing to you right now.
How could they mean anything when the weight of it all feels so Orwellian? You constantly think back to a time when breathing was easier, when you werenât so voraciousâso infinitely, pathetically hungry. But now, Simon is the Thought Police, and you, like Winston, can feel something comingâstalking, circling, tightening the trap.
You tell yourself you wonât stoop to his levelâthat you wouldnât degrade yourself, touching yourself to scraps like he did to your letter, your messy, faceless scribblings. But the truth is that youâre worse than he, because you donât need a piece of paper. Youâre already pent up, already had a hit of him, and thatâs all you need. Heâs there, beneath your skin, in your blood, indelible in every sense of the word.
You cave, slipping your fingers beneath your panties, knowing how futile it is. You canât touch yourself like he canâcanât make yourself feel the way he does, the way his hands, his mouth, make everything feel alive. Make everything feel worth it. That hollow emptinessâthe dark, insatiable void that is him; it will swallow you whole. But what else is there? What can you hold onto when nothing else has ever come close? Itâs all you have.
Though, when the wind blows, when you're alone in your room, your legs trembling from the soft circles you trace on your clit, it doesnât feel like you're alone at all. Thereâs something there, the faintest sense that someoneâs eyes are on youânot intrusive, but there. Observing, spectating..
Itâs that feelingâthat feeling of being vulnerable, of being prey that gets you going. The final puzzle piece clicking into place, the last push before your back arches and youâre coming undone, gaspingâno, howling his name, until it reverberates off the walls of your room.
You feel it all the time. A prickle down your spine when you lock your door at night, a sudden hitch in your breath when you pass by your bedroom windows after a shower. A pit in your stomach when you walk home from the railway station, some shadows out of place, some that stretch too long beneath the streetlights, like theyâre reaching for something. Or reaching for you.Â
Thereâs something that consistently lurks in the alley across from your flat. A narrow sliver between homes, shrouded in shadowâan odd, latent presence that doesnât quite fit, too still, too tall to be a dumpster. You swear itâs there almost every night, the air thick with it, but whenever you try to get a closer look, from your front door or wherever, itâs always goneâvanished.
It could be a trick of the night, a cruel illusion it could be anything, anyoneâbut would you be this wet if it was? Would your breath falter, thighs pressing tight, when the curtains stir just enough to frame the shadow across the street?
You feel it, a slow creep along your spine. A presence you can never name, but know all the same. It feels like him, each goosebump shouting and hissing his name. Itâs a connection that defies reason, something deeper than instinct, sharper than memory. A pull, a whisper in your blood, like an unspoken language only the two of you understand. Youâve never felt anything like it before, never known a presence so visceral, so consuming. If this is madness, if this is nothing more than a delusion stitched together by longing and desperationâso be it.
Youâd welcome insanity if it meant he was really here.
The shadow lingers. Not moving, not retreating. Just watching. Waiting.
A whisper curls in the back of your mind, sultry and insistentâgo to the window. Let him see.
You leave it open now. Always.
The only thing youâve gained since losing your virginity to Simon is a strange, newfound confidenceâlike a secret only you know, a mark heâs left on you that no one else can see. The longing isnât new anymore; itâs settled in, familiar, woven into the fabric of your days. It doesnât sting like it used to, but it never really leaves either, just hums beneath the surface, constant and quiet.
But the irony isnât lost on you. Because for all that confidence, youâve never felt emptier.
Youâre four hours deep into your shift. Itâs a quarter past four in the afternoon and youâre standing in the detergent aisle, one hand gripping the pricing gun, the other peeling discount stickers off the roll and slapping âClubcard Exclusiveâ onto bottles of Persil like a machine. Mindless. Repetitive. A perfect, numbing distraction.
Four lousy weeks since Simon. Four weeks of gaps where his presence used to be, of clawing at scraps just to feel something real. Now, all youâve got is the fluorescent hum of the overhead lights and the sharp scent of artificial âSpring Freshâ assaulting your nose.
And then comes Keith.
Fucking Keith.
His footsteps are light, but not light enough. Like a predator who thinks heâs stealthy when, really, heâs stomping through the underbrush, scaring off anything with a pulse. You always know when heâs coming, when heâs about to invade your space. It starts as a shift in the atmosphere, an overwhelming surge of something cloying, thick, unwelcome. It seeps into your personal bubble like a scent you canât scrub off, a presence you canât ignore no matter how hard you try.
"Hey, love," he drawls, his northern accent grating the moment it reaches your ears. He sidles up to you with that same cocky ease, the kind that might almost be impressive if it werenât so painfully unwarrantedâlike he truly believes he belongs at your side, like heâs convinced himself you want him there.
You donât look at him. You keep your focus on the detergent, pressing the sticker against the plastic with a little too much force. Maybe if you ignore him, heâll take the hint this time.
Though, he never does.
âDidnât think Iâd find you today,â Keith continues, leaning against the shelf with that stupid, self-satisfied smirk. As if youâve been playing some kind of cat-and-mouse game rather than actively avoiding him. âBeen hidinâ from me or somethinâ?â
You exhale sharply through your nose, and internally count to three.
Heâs not ugly. Not by any means. Heâs tall-ish, broad-shouldered but lanky, with sharp green eyes that never seem to blink, like theyâre waiting for something to happen. His jaw is set, strong, but there's an unsettling tightness to his smileâlike heâs always hiding something just beneath the surface.
His confidence is anything but charming; itâs suffocating. It pours out of him in tides, clinging to you like obnoxious, over-sprayed cheap cologne, like the lingering stench of stale Lynx body spray that seems to follow him, no matter where he goes.
âIâm working, Keith.â Your voice is flat, clipped. Not an invitation.
âOh, I see that.â He gestures to the bottles like heâs just now noticing them. âRiveting stuff. But, yâknow⌠if you ever wanna take a break, I could keep you company. Maybe grab a drink after the shift?â
The same fucking offer, over and over. Like if he keeps throwing it at you, eventually, youâll crack.
You sigh, setting the pricing gun down with a little more force than necessary. âI donât drink.â
Keith chuckles, unconvinced. âEveryone drinks.â
Jesus Christ.
You finally turn to look at himâa mistake. His grin widens, taking your attention as a victory. His eyes rake over you, lingering a little too long in places that make your skin crawl.
âCâmon,â he says, voice dipping into something meant to be sultry but only makes your stomach twist. âIâd be good to you, yâknow.â
There it is. That undertone, that expectationâthe same fucking entitlement youâve seen on him a million times before.
Your fingers twitch, itching to whack him over the head with the pricing gun. Instead, you grab another sticker, slap it onto the next bottle, and pretend he doesnât exist.
But he isnât done.
âYouâve been different lately,â he muses, watching you too closely, eyes raking up your body, to your face, and back down. âReal quiet. Distracted. Whatâs up with that, honey?â
Your jaw tightens. You press another sticker down, smoothing out the edges.
âNothing.â
Keith hums. âThat right?â
You grit your teeth. You hate this. You hate that heâs noticed. Hate that heâs perceptive enough to see the cracks. Hate that some part of you, some stupid, pathetic part, is sort of enjoying the attention âeven if itâs coming from him.
Because itâs something.
Because itâs not radio silence.
But itâs not him. Itâs not him, and you fucking hate that. You hate Simon for leaving you ravaged without so much as a goodbye. He ruined you, twisted everything you thought you knew, and then just vanished like you were nothing. And thatâs what cuts the deepestâthat you were never even worth the closure.
You should've known better, back then. But you sure as hell know now.
Usually, youâd brush Keith off with a simple excuseâa friend you donât have, a date that doesnât exist. A lie. Youâve perfected the art of deflection, wrapping yourself in a comfortable mask that keeps him at arm's length. Heâs persistent, but youâre sharper. Always have been.
But when he presses again, you hesitate.
âCâmon,â Keith says, his voice too casual, âJust one drink, on me. What do you say?â
You feel the old reflex kick in, the instinct to shoot him down. But you hesitate. The words hang there, suspended in the air, ready to be said.
Maybe itâs the loneliness gnawing at you, sinking its claws deeper into your skin with every passing day. Maybe at this point, youâre craving anythingâthe heat of another person, the touch, the distraction. Anything to fill the space Simon carved out and left behind, like a hole in your chest that nothingâs been able to fill.
Or maybe itâs just a fuck-you to Simon. A fuck-you to the way he still haunts you, weaving through your mind like wind through dead branches, whispering questions that will never be answered. To the ache burrowed deep, winding through your ribs like roots splitting through concrete, relentless in its hold.Â
You suck in a breath, the tension fizzling and popping inside you, and before you even realize whatâs happening, you hear yourself say, âAlright. Fine. One drink.âÂ
At least it was on him.Â
Keithâs expression shifts, his eyes widening in shock, like the idea of you saying yes never even actually crossed his mind. The surprise on his face is almost comical. He stumbles over his words, trying to mask his confusion with a quick laugh.
âNo way,â he says, shaking his head, a grin tugging at the corners of his mouth. âReally? Iâuh, I thought youâd shut me down again.â
You donât answer, just shrug. The words feel too heavy in your mouth like they donât belong to you. But theyâre out there now, hanging between you like a promise neither of you fully understands yet.
Keithâs smile widens, but thereâs something gross behind it now. Something triumphant.
âWell, if youâre sure,â he says, stepping a little closer, the air thickening with the scent of his cologne and something darker, more insistent. âI know a place nearby. Not too far. We can grab a pint or two, talk... maybe get to know each other better.â
His gaze lingers on you, too long, too shallow. His eyes flicker down to your lips for just a fraction of a second, then back to your eyes, and you feel a shiver run down your spine. Ugh.
It should make you step back, re-think what youâre jumping into.Â
But you donât. You canât. You need Simon out of your head and gone. For good.
âAlright,â you say again, this time with a little more force as if youâre trying to convince yourself just as much as you are him. âOne drink.â
Keith grins like the Cheshire Cat, the satisfaction in his eyes clear as day. âIâll pick you up at 9,â he says, voice low and assured. âPlenty of time to get home and change, right?â He lets out a small chuckle, his confidence oozing from every word like he already knows the night is his to win.
You nod mechanically, a brief pause before you speak again. âYeah⌠Iâll uhâIâll text you my address.â The words come out flat, detached. Itâs no big deal. Totally.
His smile widens, smug in a way that makes your stomach churn. âGood. Iâll see you then.â He turns to head back toward the break room, giddily gliding down the aisle, like he's walking on air.
You just stand there, frozen for a second, watching him go. The store hums around youâdistant chatter, the clinking of metal shopping carts, the soft shuffle of customers weaving through the aisles. It all feels like a blur, the noise distant and muffled, as though you're submerged in water. Your mind is far away, caught in the thick fog of uncertainty.
You donât even know what youâre doing, but maybe this is what you need.
Simon lingers in the back of your mind like a shadow youâre always reaching for without thinkingâan instinct, a reflex you canât unlearn. And the thought of replacing that longing with something so fleeting, so hollowâsomething so⌠Keith, feels like a betrayal. Like carving out a piece of yourself and handing it to someone who will never understand its weight.
A sigh escapes you. You pull out your phone, thumb hovering over the screen as you look at the glowing numbers. Your heart flutters, unease building with each second that passes. But you donât stop yourself.Â
You type out your address slowly, each letter feeling like a weight added to your chest. It shouldnât be a big deal, right? It couldnât be that bad. Youâll just go out and try to make the best of it.
You hit âsend.â
So much for getting to know each other.Â
Keith hardly bothered to ask anything about you; the conversation is dominated by the insufferable droning on about his crypto investments. You arenât really listening.. Your mind keeps drifting, thinking of his absence.
Simonâs absence.Â
God, it bothers you how deeply heâs imprinted on your mind. Was it the fact that he took your virginity? Thereâs no way it could have been that chemically altering. Yes the sex was amazing, but how could he haunt your thoughts so extensively after barely saying a word to you, only ever muttering filthy things while fucking your brain numb?
Stop thinking about him fucking you. This is a problem.Â
You pull yourself back to the present. The dateâs going... fine. Nothing special. Youâd pulled on a simple pair of jeans, a black top. Nothing too flashy, nothing that screamed you were tryingâbecause you werenât. What did it matter? Not like you had anywhere to go, or anyone to impress anymore. Clothes didnât mean much when your world had narrowed down to this: a quick escape.
The pub is crowded for a Thursday night, an odd mix of tired regulars and middle-aged menâDILFs youâd much rather be accompanying. They laugh loudly, their voices thick with the warmth of too much liquor; theyâre the ones you should be with, the ones who seem to care, to be alive in a way that doesnât feel so desperate.
But instead, youâre stuck with Keith. His voice drones on in the background, talking about Bitcoin and intermittent fasting like heâs just discovered the secrets of the universe. His words are empty, meaningless in the moment, but you smile and nod, letting the noise of the pub drown out whatever nonsense heâs spewing. The drinks are goodâstrong, surprisingly soâand it burns its way down your throat, a welcome distraction. The alcohol settles into your chest like an old friend, warm and familiar, a little dangerous, but comforting all the same.
Youâre a pint and a half deep, just enough for a pleasant buzz, for the edges of your thoughts to soften. Keith, on his third, is looser, expressive, leaning into your space a bit too much, his knee brushing against yours beneath the table. The alcohol makes it easier to stay present, to focus more on the moment instead of the static in your head.
He cleans up decently. The dim lights of the pub soften the harsh hazel-green of his eyes, take the tension out of the lines around his mouth. After a pint, heâs not as awful to look at. As you near the end of your second, heâs not too hard to listen to. His presence in the booth next to you isnât suffocating anymore. The uncomfortable tightness has faded, replaced by something more manageableâa comfortable numbness that lets you go through the motions without feeling every single heartbeat. The kind of numbness you can live with for a while if you donât think too hard about it.
You welcome it, more than you welcome the shit storm youâve been for the past month.
You let the minutes pass, letting yourself be carried by the momentum of it all. You finish the pint, your focus drifting to the sensation of his hand brushing against yours, to the faint, gnawing in your heart as it cries for affection. It was all so simple. So much easier than youâd expected, this little dance, this surface-level distraction.
Then, a few minutes later, it happens. Keith leans in, his lips parting, the space between you closing like a slow, inevitable collision. His conviction wraps around him like a cloak, thick and heavy, as if he knows exactly how this will unfold. The warmth of his breath grazes your cheek, his scent faint but persistent, a mix of cologne and something stale, like the nightâs beer. His eyes flicker with implicit expectation before they flit shut, his lips a mere centimeter from yours.
You donât pull away.
You donât have the energy for that anymore. Not for the back-and-forth, the push and pull of deciding whatâs right and whatâs not. Youâve been worn down, layer by pitiful layer until all thatâs left is this: the heat, the need, the emptiness that drives you to reach out and accept whatever is offered. You let it happen, your lips parting to meet his, the kiss tentative at first, but growing more insistent as the seconds pass.
Itâs not good. His lips are too stiff, too small against yours, moving with a clumsy eagerness that reeks of desperationâlike heâs been waiting for this and has no idea what to do now that itâs happening. But itâs something.
Something to dull the ache, to quiet the static in your mind long enough to pretend youâre not suffocating. Something to ground you, to remind you that youâre still flesh and bone, not just longing and regret. Something to forget in the morning.
Because why not?
Maybe if you drown yourself in something elseâsomething that isnât honey-brown eyes and a mask that hides too muchâyou can finally erase the impression Simon left behind. Finally silence the ache, the apparition of his touch that you still feel under your clothes, even within the pub. Even with Keith by your side.Â
Maybe if you let yourself unravel into someone else, scatter the pieces of what Simon broke and stitch together the fragments of what came before him, youâll be able to move on. Maybe if you swallow it all, stretch yourself wide, dislocate your jaw just to fit it all in and swallowâyouâll get by. Youâll manage. Even if it never digests. Even if it all bleeds through the cracks anyway.
So, you push further. Let your fingers ghost over his knee, lean in closeâjust enough that your breath brushes his skin. You whisper, low and saccharine, asking if he wants to get out of hereâhead back to your place. A distraction. A mistake in the making.
Keith practically yanks you from the bar, his grip firmâtoo firmâas he steers you toward his car with single-minded determination. His fingers dig into your wrist like heâs afraid youâll slip away, like he needs to keep you tethered. The street lights flicker overhead, casting fleeting shadows across his face, sharpening the hunger in his eyes.
The drive is a blur of speed and silence, the tension between you both is thick enough to choke on. His knuckles are white around the steering wheel, foot heavy on the gas, cutting the fifteen-minute trip to your flat down to five. He doesnât speak. Neither do you. Thereâs nothing to say. Just expectation hanging in the air, dense and stifling, laced with something desperate, something thoughtless. You let it wrap around you, pull you under.
Then youâre at your door, and heâs on you. His chest flush against your back, hands already gripping your hips, body pressing close, his breath hot and uneven against your neck. His teeth graze your skin, just barely, like heâs tasting his killâlike he already knows heâs won.
God, you feel like a slut.
The world keeps spinning. Traffic hums in the distance, the wind howls through the alleyways, life presses ever forward, indifferent to the choices you make. But here, as your hands tremble against the cold metal of the lockâit all shrinks to this. The frantic thrum of your pulse. The too-firm grip of his hands, insistent and wandering, pressing into places they have no right to be.
Because you donât belong to Keith.
You donât look back at him. You canât. Because if you do, if you meet his lustful, haughty gaze, you might stop.
And you canât afford to stop. Not yet.
When you both make it inside, you shut the door and Keith tries to kiss you, to make this something itâs notâsome messy, desperate collision of lips and teeth, a lustful explosionâbut youâre not down for that. You tilt your head and give him your neck, dodging his lips like itâs second nature. He doesnât notice as you guide him to your room, too lost in the idea of getting his dick wet to realize youâre steering this whole thing.
And wet, he gets it.
He fucks you on your bed, and itâs got to be the most boring experience of your life. Heâs got you prone, on your stomach, and you donât look at him. You canât look at himâbecause that would make it real. That would solidify the fact that youâre here, in your own bed, fucking Keith of all people.
You keep your gaze fixed ahead, on the dim sliver of moonlight seeping through your windowâs curtain, as he ruts into you. The pace is off, mechanical like heâs following some half-baked porn script in his head. You have to fight the urge to ask if itâs even in, if heâs just finger blasting you. With Simon, you didnât have to wonder. The stretch, the burn of him splitting you open, the way he had you trembling, leaking down your thighs before he even properly fucked youâthat was something else entirely.
Keith leans over you occasionally, breath hot and panting against your ear, his attempt at dirty talk making you cringe.
âYou like that, love?â
No, Keith. Youâre jackhammering my cunt with your pencil dick.
You donât answer out loud. You just lay there, belly pressed against the mattress, and try to conjure the feeling of someone elseâsomeone bigger, rougher, someone who knows what to do with you. But even in the dark, even facing away, you canât bring yourself to lie. This isnât Simon. Itâs not even close.
You wait. You endure.
Finally, he shudders and spills into the condom you made him wear, and you silently thank the universe that the miserable ten minutes are over. Simon had you writhing for at least thirty. After eating you out, too.
You continue staring ahead as Keith collapses beside you with a satisfied groan, murmuring something, pressing a kiss to your forehead like this meant anything. You donât react. You barely register his voice.
Because out the window, across the street, thereâs that shadow again.
Still. Watching. Waiting.
And for the first time all night, you feel something genuine.
You definitely couldâve found better than Keith. But God, heâs easyâeasier than a prostitute in the back of a bar, and just as desperate.
Itâs been a month since you first fucked himâtwo since Simonâand heâs like a goddamn pest, lingering, clinging, always there. But you donât push him away, either. Not completely. Because if youâre being honest with yourself, it is nice to have someone in your bed, someone to text, someone to pick you up when you donât feel like taking the train. Heâs convenient. Reliable, even.
But his affections are only tolerable in small doses before they become suffocating. Heâs a lovesick puppy, always trailing after you, those hopeful, stupid green eyes searching for something youâll never give him. And God, you feel horrible for using himâhorrible, but not enough to stop.
Each time heâs between your legs, each time his name pops up on your phone with a good morning, love, each time you toss him a scrap of attentionâa lazy smile, a half-hearted hug, a peck on the cheek if heâs especially luckyâyou see it. That flicker in his eyes, that glimmer of something warm and delusional, like he thinks this is leading somewhere. Like he thinks youâll wake up one day and want him the way he wants you.
And maybe thatâs the worst part. The way he clings to every half-truth, every unspoken maybe, every quiet moment that isnât outright rejection. Heâs a fool for it. And maybe youâre cruel for letting him believe in something that doesnât exist.
But you did warn him. Laid it out in blunt, undeniable termsâthis isnât love, Keith. Just sex. No strings, no expectations.
But you suppose, for someone like him, being something to youâno matter how small, how insignificantâis still better than being nothing at all.
Simon doesnât linger in your mind the way he used to. Not as much. Not as sharp. You shut off notifications for BBC, but couldnât bring yourself to delete the app. Just in case.Â
But every time Keith is on top of youâgrunting, sweating, tryingâyouâre reminded of what you had. What it felt like to be wanted in a way that left bruises, but youâve accepted the fact that Simon is gone. Gone with the wind; traceless, like he was never here to begin with.
Keith stays over some nights, always making sure to slip out in the morning. Per your request.
At first, he obeys. But then the edges start to smudge. Morning lingers too long, bleeding into midday, stretching into afternoon like melted wax. Before you know it, heâs still there. Still there when youâre making coffee, still there when you just want to be alone in your dingy flat.
You wake up one morning to an empty bed and the smell of eggs sizzling, the sound of your cabinets opening and closing. You drag yourself out of bed, rubbing the sleep from your eyes, and there he is, standing in your kitchen, bare-chested and humming some god-awful tune as he tends to eggs and flips pancakes with a spatula that hasn't been used since you bought it.
âMorning, sweetheart,â he says, flashing you a grin like this is normal, like heâs your boyfriend.
You blink at him, groggy, disoriented. âWhereâd you even get pancake mix?â
âHad some at my place,â he says, as if thatâs a completely reasonable explanation.
You texted him last night for him to come over and fuck you, and he brought foodâfrom his own flatâto cook in the morning. Was this supposed to be romantic? Jesus, fuck. You turn back to your room, ignoring the smell of breakfast permeating your walls, and throw yourself back under the covers.
It only gets worse from there, though.
He starts using your shower, stepping out smelling like your shampoo, like your soap, like your space isnât your own anymore.Â
Even when heâs not here, he finds ways to insert himself into your day. Youâre halfway out the door, ready to catch the train to work, when your phone vibrates in your pocket.
Keith: Hey, on my way to pick you up
Your stomach sinks. You didnât ask him to do that.
You sigh, rubbing your temple as you type out a quick, You really donât have to, I can take the train.
Keith: Nah, babe, Iâm gonna.
And thatâs the problem. It doesnât matter what you say. He just does it anyway.
Youâre on your lunch break one day, tucked away in the breakroom, enjoying a moment of peace with a granola bar you snagged from the petrol station days ago. The store is busy, but back here, itâs quietâjust the faint hum of the coffee machine and the distant chatter of coworkers.
Then, something tugs at a strand of your hair, pulled tight in your ponytail, making your head jerk back just a little.
Your throat tightens before you even turn.
Sure enoughâKeith.
He plops down in the chair next to you, all smug, too close, legs spread wide as he leans back like he owns the place.
âHowâs my lovely girlfriend?â he asks, tone playful.
Your fingers tighten around the granola bar, the wrapper crinkling. âIâm not your girlfriend, Keith,â you say, feigning a small, polite smile. âBut Iâm okay, thanks for asking.â
Keith just chuckles like youâve made some kind of joke. âYeah, totally. Yâknow, weâve been at this for a while, lovey. Think youâll let me meet your parents soon?â
You freeze mid-bite.
Thereâs a slow, nauseating churn in your gut, a deep unease that coils tight around your ribs, squeezing, festering.
âYou canâtââ you pinch your nose bridge, âYouâre not meeting my parents,â you say, firmer this time, staring at him, hopingâprayingâthat maybe this time, heâll get it.
Keith just shakes his head, still grinning. âAwh, thatâs alright. Youâre just scared, dolly. I can wait for you.â
Your mouth goes dry. You donât even bother dignifying that with a response. You just shove the last of your granola bar into your mouth, chew like youâre forcing down something bitter, and push back from the table.
âGotta get back,â you mumble, standing, already heading for the door.
Keith doesnât follow, but you can feel his eyes on you as you leave.
The more he smothers you, the more you wish you never started this shit in the first place. What were you thinking? You shouldâve just put on your big girl panties, pushed the memory of Simon as far down as you could, and moved on. But each time you think of Simon, itâs like a knife twisting in your gut, because God, just the thought of being able to moan his name makes you want him all over again. You crave the way he fit, the way he understood you without all the effort. You want him to give you what you needâwhat you crave, even though you know deep down that itâs a foolâs wish.
With Keith, the cracks are starting to show. In bed, he starts trying too hard, like heâs desperately trying to prove something to you. Heâs fishing for praise, waiting for some kind of validation. Heâll ask, âThat was better than last time, right?â as though the answer matters to you. As if youâve been keeping score.
You arenât. You never were.
Your room smells like him nowâlike cheap cologne and sweat. He just gave you the most disappointing dicking yet, and heâs already passed out. The light is off and youâre lying there, forced into a state of calm thatâs not really calm at all. You can feel him beside you, his breath steady as he sleeps, completely oblivious to the storm inside you. You turn away from him, laying on your side, staring blankly at the wall in front of you, your heart hammering in your chest.
Fuck, what the fuck are you doing? Why the are you doing this to yourself? It feels like punishment. Like you've shattered some unspoken rule, a silent code, and now you're paying the price. You just wanted an escape, a moment to breathe. Not to be someoneâs charity case. The questions spin around you, but there are no answers. No clarity. Just endless doubt.
You let out a soft sigh and toss back onto your back, the weight of everything pressing down on your chest as your head rests on the pillows. Your eyes catch the sight of Keith's hoodie, thrown carelessly over the desk chair.
As you stare at the hoodie, lying there where you first saw Simon, you truly feel itâheâs really gone. No longer in the fragments of your room, no longer in your bed, slouched in your desk chair, lingering on your dresser.
The room is suffocating, thick with heat that presses down on your chest, suffocating you with every breath. Itâs heavier than it should be, the air stale and still, clinging to your skin like a second layer. Keith insists on keeping the windows shut. He hates the drafts. You hate him for it.
You sit up, your skin sticking to the sheets. The weight of the night lingers like a fog, clouding your thoughts. You sigh, lethargic, your body sluggish as you swing your legs over the edge of the bed, the coolness of the floor greeting your bare feet. Your panties are discarded somewhere in the mess. You find them and pull them on absently, the fabric sliding over your skin
You round the bed quietly, your footsteps muffled against the worn carpet as you approach the bedside table next to his sleeping form. Keithâs pack of cigarettes sits there, unassuming, but it calls to you. You tug one out, the familiar crinkle of the cardboard grounding you for a moment. You take his lighter next, the flick of the flame a cruel reminder of how the nasty, expensive habit has settled into your bones. You never meant to start smoking. You swore you wouldnât. But now, itâs just another part of the routine, a pointless comfort youâve grown too used to, another reason you shouldâve never gotten with Keith.
You walk to the shut window and lift it open with one hand. The cool night air rushes in immediately, cooling your skin. You lift the cigarette to your lips, sparking it, and watch as the tip ignites. The glow is soft against the dark, the only light in the room for a brief moment before the flame dies and the smoke curls up, wrapping around you like a secret. You take a drag, inhaling deep, the burn of the nicotine settling in your chest, grounding you, if only for a second.
You lean against the window frame, half-sitting on the bottom portion as you lean to let the smoke escape outside. The night is unnervingly quiet. You guess itâs just about midnight, but you donât bother checking your phone. You take in the sight of the street, the houses on your block, There's nothing across the way tonight, just the empty stretch of alley, and you find your gaze drawn to it, unable to look away. The stillness wraps around you, and the faint echoes of your own thoughts seem too loud in the silence.
Something coils sharp and tenacious in your chest as you stare into the emptiness. You let Keith in, let him slither into the cracks of your life, and now itâs rotting you from the inside out. Youâve been shoving anything you can into the hollow space he leftâdistractions, vices, fleeting touchesâbut it only stretches wider, gaping and endless..
A part of you aches for that shadow to appear, if only once, just to feel something. Because another part of you knows what it isâwho it is. Knows that heâs gone.
And that, more than anything, stings.
The cigarette is nearly burned down to the filter, the last embers glowing weakly in the dark, a pale orange against the quiet night. A gust of cold wind bites at your skin, snapping you back to reality with a sharp chill. You turn to look over your shoulder, and Keith is sprawled across the bed, mouth hanging open in that obnoxious, ungodly way he sleeps. A snore rattles through the silence and your eyes instinctively roll.
You take a final drag, the smoke bitter on your tongue, and then snuff it out against the window sill and toss it, watching it smolder into the dirt below. You stand up, stretching your stiff limbs, and close the window, leaving just a small crack for the night air to filter in.Â
Fuck Keith and whatever it is he wants. This is your house. Youâre not his mom, his girlfriend, or whatever the hell else he thinks you are. If you want the window open, then so be itÂ
You turn back to the bed, your body aching for the solitude of your own sheets. You crawl under the covers, pulling them tight around your shoulders. The warmth is a small comfort, but itâs enough. Sleep tugs at your eyelids, beckoning you into the quiet. Your hands cover your ears, trying to block out the guttural snoring coming from Keithâs side of the bed. Itâs like a fucking chainsaw cutting through the peace you crave. But you hold on to the stillness, the promise of escapeâif only for a few hours.
Youâre dead asleep when the sound cuts through the thick haze of unconsciousnessâa soft, broken whimper. Barely a sound at all, more like a breath hitching in a throat, swallowed before it can fully form. It weaves itself into your dreams, threading through whatever meaningless fragments your mind had pieced together, distorting them into something unsettling.
Your body is heavy, limbs weighed down by exhaustion, but the noise needles at you, persistent in its quiet agony. You groan, eyes still shut, rolling onto your side as you mumble something incoherentâsomething about Keith shutting the fuck up, that you have work in the morning. Whatever it is heâs doing, you donât want to hear it.
For a moment, silence settles over the room like a thin sheet, barely there but present enough to lull you back into the pull of sleep. Then the bed shifts. A slow, deliberate movement, like someone rising carefully, trying not to wake you. A footstep follows, then another, the faint creak of floorboards. You breathe a little easier, thinking maybe heâs leavingâmaybe heâs finally getting the hint.
But then it comes again. This time, distant, muffled. A cry, higher-pitched, threaded with something frantic. It makes your skin prickle, not with concern, but with irritation.
You frown, eyes still shut, brain too fogged with sleep to process much beyond vague annoyance. Heâs either having a nightmare or, worse, a wank in the corner. Neither interests you. You donât even want him here, in your bed, taking up your space.
You sigh, pressing your face deeper into the pillow, trying to will yourself back into unconsciousness. Whatever it is, itâs not your problem.
Seconds later, you hear it again, more desperate this time, like a wounded animal with its throat ripped out, struggling to breathe. It grates against your nerves, pulling you further from sleep, until frustration bubbles up in your chest.
With a groggy grumble, you push yourself up, your movements sluggish and heavy with exhaustion. Your right arm props behind you for support as you rub at your face, knuckles pressing into your tired, shut eyes.
âKeith, will you shut the fuââ
Your voice cuts off mid-sentence, throat tightening as you finally blink the sleep from your vision. The dim light from the streetlamp outside casts long shadows across the room, bathing everything in sickly, pale yellow streaks.
Keith isnât in bed with you.
Heâs in the chairâyour desk chairâagainst the wall and facing your bed, bound with ropes that are wrapped so tight they cut into his arms, legs, wrists, chest. A rag from your kitchen, dark with spit, is stuffed into his mouth, held in place by a strip of fabric wrapped around the back of his head. His chest heaves, his nostrils flaring with panicked breath as he stares at you with wide, frantic eyes, veins bulging against his skin.
Your body locks up, breath snagging in your throat.
âWhat the fââ
You barely get the words out before Keith starts thrashing against his restraints, his muffled cries breaking through the stagnant air of your bedroom. His whole body shakes with the force of it, the chair rocking slightly under his weight, but it doesnât budge. The ropes hold firm.
You start to move, heart hammering, the slow creep of realization curling up your spine like a cold finger tracing each vertebra.
Then you feel it.
A large, cold, calloused hand slowly traces the curve of your upper back, dragging upward, a ghost of a touch against your spine. It lingers at the nape of your neck, fingers threading through the back of your scalp, tightening just enough to make your breath hitch.
Every muscle in your body locks up, your breath shuddering out in uneven bursts. The room shrinks, walls closing in around you. The grip on your hair tightensânot a yank, not yet, just a firm hold that makes your scalp prickle.
Then, a shift. A press of something solid and warm against the crown of your head. The unmistakable drag of breath as whoever inhales deeply, like heâs committing you to memory. A low, gravelly hum rumbles from his chest, thick with something unreadable. Satisfaction. Possession. Maybe both.
He's right beside you. Close enough that you can feel the heat radiating off of him, that his presence warps the air around you, suffocating, intoxicating.
You donât dare move.
Because you know exactly who it is.
The scent of him just like you rememberâgunpowder, sweat, something faintly woodyâclashes with the lingering staleness of your room. It seeps into your lungs, an old ghost resurrected, clawing its way back to the surface.
Then, finally, a voiceârough, undeniably Mancunian, curling at the edges with something almost amused.
âBeen busy, huh, pet?â
The words slither into your ear, smooth and deliberate, sinking their hooks into you like they never left.
You swallow hard, the heat pooling low in your stomach at the deep, deliberate pull of his voice. It scrapes against something raw inside you, something that never healed right. Your heartbeat stutters, then picks up, but not from fear.Â
Still, you donât move. You donât look.
If this is a dream, you donât want to wake upâwake up and risk him being gone again.
Your eyes stay locked onto Keithâs, wide and frantic in the dark, his chest rising and falling in shallow, panicked breaths. He looks at you like youâre supposed to do something, like youâre supposed to save him.
But before you can, Simon makes the choice for you.
The grip in your hair tightensâno longer just a hold, but a command. He tugs, slow and controlled, and your head tilts back whether you want it to or not. Your breath hitches, your fingers twitch at your sides, but you let him. Youâll always let him.
And there he is.
Maskless.
Your breath snags in your throat, brain stalling, tripping over itself. You need a secondâone long, aching secondâto make sense of it, to stitch together the face you only ever caught in fragments. A shadowed jaw, a flicker of his mouth, the barest glimpse of his nose when he was buried between your thighs all those weeks ago.
But his eyes, his eyes donât lie.
Theyâre the same eyes that have haunted you for weeksâdark, relentless, burning into you even in sleep. The same ones that linger behind your eyelids, that youâve conjured in the dead of night, that youâve chased with trembling hands and gasping breaths, desperate for something that feels like him.
And right now, theyâre burning into you, unreadable as ever.
Heâs here, in the flesh.
His bone structure is cut from marbleâsharp cheekbones, a strong brow, a subtly clefted chin that adds to the undeniable masculinity of his face. Soft blond stubble shadows his jaw, catching the dim light as he tilts his head, studying you with those dangerous, all-consuming brown eyes.
Scars carve their history into his skin, some thin and white, others pink and freshly healed. One splits through his eyebrow, another drags across his cheek, and two more pull faintly at his lips. They settle among the freckles dusting his nose, a contradiction of softness and violence, of things that should never coexist but somehow do.
Heâs devastating.
His other hand has found your throat, palm rough and massive against your skin. He could snap your neck with half a thought, with an eighth of his strength, and yet, all he does is trace along your jugular, feeling the rapid thrum of your pulse beneath his fingertips. Itâs possessive. Calculated.
His grip shifts, sliding up to cradle your jaw, just before his thumb drags across your bottom lip. He presses forward, slow, deliberate, until his thumb slips past your teeth, resting heavy on your flat pad of your tongue.
You donât think. You just react.
Your lips wrap around the digit without a secondâs hesitation, without him even needing to ask.
And the look in his eyes?
Like he never expected anything else.
With his thumb hooked in your mouth, saliva pools at the corners of your lips, threatening to spill. You canât swallow, canât do anything but sit there, pliant and open for him, while he holds you in place like some helpless, caught fish.
His grip in your hair loosens, but only so he can guide your head forward, tilting your chin with the hand still in your mouth until your gaze lands back on Keith.
Heâs wide-eyed, panic threading through every inch of him. His breaths are ragged, desperate, as he tries to piece it all togetherâhis wrists bound tight, the ropes cutting into his skin, the oppressive weight of the man looming behind you, and the sight of you. Sitting there, silent, pliant, unresisting.
Keithâs mind races, but thereâs nothing he can do. No words, no pleas that will untangle this mess. You can see it in his eyesâthe confusion, the fear, the realization that heâs powerless. Heâs looking at you like he doesnât even recognize you anymore.
Simon hums, low and contemplative, a deep rumble that vibrates through your very bones.
âThis yâplaything, baby? What youâve been fillinâ yâtime with?â
You try to move your head, to make some kind of response, but his thumb presses down, firm, stopping you before you even begin.
His tongue clicks, a disappointed tut that rolls through your ears like a warning. Like he already knows the answer and doesnât like it.
âKnow I left you... Wasnât very nice of me, now, was it?â
His voice is thick, rich with something unreadable, but his grip tells you enough, a warning and a promise all at once. He tilts your chin back up, forcing you to meet his eyes again.
You want to tell him no, it wasnât nice, that he ripped something out of you when he left. That youâve spent every goddamn second since trying to fill the void he carved. But all that escapes is a strangled, pitiful âmm-mm,â your lips parting helplessly as spit slicks your chin.
His smirk deepens, eyes darkening as they flick down to your mouth, to the mess youâre making of yourself.
âWasnât very nice of you, though, was it? Goinâ âround openinâ your legs for the first man yâsee, hmm? First one willinâ to put his cock in what ainât hisâŚâ
The words strike something deep, hot, and ugly inside you. His? If you were his, then why the hell did he leave? Why did he disappear like smoke, slipping through your fingers, leaving you clawing at the air, grasping at nothing? What is he doing here now, after all this timeâafter breaking into your home, tearing through your life like a storm and vanishing just as quickly, leaving you to sift through the wreckage alone?
Anger surges, reckless and unthinking, and you bite down on his thumbâhard.
He doesnât pull away. Doesnât even flinch. Just smirks at the pain like youâre some unruly little puppy testing its limits. His eyes gleam, a slow, predatory amusement playing across his features as he finally, finally pulls his thumb from your mouth.
You wipe the drool from your chin with the back of your hand, straightening as much as you can under his hold. âIâm not yours,â you say, low and firm, but your voice lacks the conviction you wish it had. âIf I was yours, you wouldnât have left so suddenly, you dick.â
His expression shiftsâless amused now, more exasperated, like youâre missing something so glaringly obvious it physically pains him. He pops the same thumb into his mouth, licking the taste of you off like itâs second nature, like heâs reclaiming something.
"âCourse I left, love. Was on the run.â
You blink.
Oh.
He watches the realization flood your face, that sudden shift in your gaze thatâs almost embarrassing to witness. You can feel the heat of his stare, the sharpness of it, cutting through the tension in the room. Simon leans down toward you, dropping to one knee to be at your eye level, his movements slow, deliberate, like heâs savoring every second of your discomfort. His hands rest casually on his thighs, but thereâs nothing casual about the weight in his voice.
âBut,â he says, a playful edge in his tone, but the undertone is sharp, cutting through the soft hum of the room like a knife. âI guess if yânot mine, then I guess I should go, huh?â
The words hang between you like a challenge, testing your resolve, pushing at the walls youâve built so carefully. You feel your heart pound in your chest, your throat tightening. You open your mouth, but the words catch before they can form. You shake your head, but itâs not enough to make him stop.
He stands up then, straightening to his full height, and itâs almost like the air shifts around him, âFine then,â he says, his voice low, almost amused. âNo problem. Iâll leave. Yâcan stay here with Keith, yeah? Let âem keep yâ company.â
The words hit like a gut punch, a shock to your system as you realize youâve completely forgotten about Keith. Heâs still there, bound and helpless, and a grimace pulls at your face as you glance over at him. Sure, he was annoying, but this? This isnât what he deserved.
How Simon knows his name is a mystery, but somehow, it doesnât surprise you. It never does with him. Keithâs name slipping from Simonâs lips is an ugly reminder of something youâd rather keep buried. Something you regret.
Simon starts to turn, heading toward the door, and the world tilts on its axis.
You canât let him go, canât let him walk out like thatâagainâlike itâs nothing, like you can just let him leave and keep pretending that none of this matters.
Your legs feel weak, like they might give out from underneath you, but you manage to stand. Slowly at first, then with more urgency, your hands reaching out toward him without thinking. They land on his forearmsâmassive, firm, like steel wrapped in skinâand you grip him hard, pulling him back just a little, just enough to make him stop.
Simonâs body tenses under your touch, but he doesnât say anything right away. He simply turns back to face you, his expression unreadable. The quiet between you two stretches.
He lets you stop him. He knew you would, he wanted you to.Â
You glance at Keith, whoâs dumbfounded as he struggles to comprehend whatâs unfolding. Then you look up at Simon, where that insufferable, knowing smirk tugs at the corner of his mouth.
âDonât,â you say, voice tight.
He cocks his head, brows furrowing slightly, though amusement lingers in his dark eyes. âDonât what?â
You swallow, feel the words stick in your throat before forcing them out. âDonât go.â
Something in his expression flickers, shifts just slightly before settling into something heavier. He doesnât waste time. He steps toward Keith, bending at the waist until heâs face-to-face with him, a lion looming over an antelope with its throat already torn open, arterial spray painting the dirt, limbs twitching in useless protest as the last dregs of life seep out.
âHear that, lad?â Simon drawls, voice thick with condescension. âShe doesnât want me to go. Wants me tâstay right hereâstuff her full oâ my cock, yeah? Bet she doesnât want that from you.â
Your mouth falls open, lips parting in shock. Not because heâs wrongâJesus, heâs not wrongâbut because he says it like itâs the simplest fact in the world, like heâs reading it straight from the book of universal truths.
Keith is trembling now, his whole body shaking like a leaf caught in a storm. His chest rises and falls in quick, shallow breaths. He looks so small, so pathetic compared to Simonâs hulking figure.
Simon doesnât look away. He watches him, studies him, his gaze slow and calculating before he hums, almost thoughtful. His voice is deceptively quiet, laced with something deceptively soft. âThink that pencil dick does âer wonders, eh?â
Keith whimpers, eyes wide, body rigid, already feeling the metaphorical teeth at his throat. Simon just reveles in it, feeding off the fear like itâs sustenance. And youâre dumbfounded.Â
And aroused.
You shouldnât react to this the way you are. You shouldnât feel your cunt growing wetter than it's been in months. shouldnât feel your breath hitch at the way heâs openly claiming you without hesitation, without shame. But you do.
Because even if Simon doesnât have the right to stake his claim on you, doesnât have the right to act as if you still belong to himâdoesnât he?
You signed your name at the bottom of that letter all those weeks ago.
And to Simon, that was the dotted line. The confirmation.
You swallow, the sound too loud in the thick silence, your body frozen as you watch Simonâs one-man pissing contest unfold. It gets his attention, though. His head turns sharply, eyes locking onto yours with an intensity that pins you in place, cutting through the tension in the room like a knife.
Despite the draft floating through, the air is thick in the room; it presses against your chest as you stand frozen, caught between two menâone holding you hostage with his eyes, the other trembling with frustration and fear. Simonâs smirk doesnât falter as he straightens up, glancing over his shoulder at you with that same cold gleam in his eyes. Heâs toying with you. You know that. He has been. But there's something different now. Something sharp and jagged in the way heâs looking at you, like heâs definitively claiming the space between your hearts, drawing lines you canât ignore.
Keithâs eyes flicker between you and Simon, darting like heâs searching for an escape. You imagine he thinks Simon is some crazy ex, some jealous, unhinged thing from your past. But that couldnât be farther from the truth. He whines through the make-shift gag like he wants to say something, to demand an explanation, to plead. But heâs frozen, paralyzed, locked in place as it all crumbles right in front of him, powerless to do a damn thing about it.
Simon, however, is unfazed. Barely even interested. His eyes flick back to Keith, sharp and dismissive, like heâs looking at a stale loaf of bread.
âYou, lad⌠are just a stopgap. Temporary. Got that?â
Simonâs voice is steady, calmâlike heâs explaining something simple, something Keith shouldâve already known. Then, without warning, he grips Keithâs hair, yanking his head up from the scalp and forcing him to look into those cold, unrelenting eyes.
Keith lets out a sharp, choked noise as he makes Keithâs head bob in a mockery of a nod.
âYeah,â Simon murmurs, voice laced with amusement. âThatâs right. Now youâre gettinâ it.â
Simon releases Keithâs head with a sharp flick of his wrist, sending it snapping backward. Keith groans, but Simon doesnât spare him another glance.
Instead, he turns back to you. Fully. His gaze is heavy, piercingâdigging beneath your skin like heâs peeling back layers, searching for the fight in you, daring you to contradict him.
But you donât. You canât.
And he knows it.
You want to scream at him, to remind him that youâre not a prize to be fought over or a possession to be claimed. But the words die in your throat, stifled by the raw, undeniable tension curling in the pit of your stomach. Because heâs right.
He stalks toward you, closer and closer until youâre forced to crane your neck to meet his gaze. The room feels smaller, quieter, as if the world around you has paused in reverence of him. You canât escape his eyes, those brown depths that see right through you. They peel back the layers of your mind.
His lips curl into a dangerous, knowing smirk that sends a shiver down your spine. âThought yâcould just disobey, sweet thing?â he murmurs, his voice soft but dripping with venom. âThought yâcould just fuck off and be so⌠disrespectful?â
His words slice through the air, every syllable hitting you like a lash against your skin, the sting burrowing under your flesh. His eyes darken, becoming something primal, like heâs waiting for the moment you finally realize just how much he controls you. âThought I wouldnât know?â His voice drops lower, almost a growl. âThought I wouldnât do somethinâ about it?â
You try to hold your ground, to summon the will to look away, but the weight of his gaze pins you in place. His eyes bore into yours, unblinking, unrelenting. Thereâs a coldness there that you never thought youâd see from him.
Itâs unmistakable now. The contempt he feels for youâdisrespecting him, breaking his trustâitâs palpable in the furrow of his brown and the frown lines on his lips.
Your throat tightens, a mix of shame and anger swirling inside you. You want to argue, but how could you? After everything? Heâs right, isnât he? You did disrespect him. You did go to someone else, let another man touch you.
You didnât think heâd come back, but deep, deep down you knew he would. You knew he was still there, always watching, you just didnât want to accept it. And now, as you stand in front of him, feeling the weight of his gaze, you realize the kind of power he has over you. Not just physical, but mental. Emotional. And that power isnât something you can run from, no matter how much you want to.
His hand reaches up, brushing a loose strand of hair from your face, the touch soft, almost affectionate, but you can feel the danger lurking just beneath the surface.Â
His breath skates along your ear, scorching in its proximity, his lips barely touching but still branding you like a slow drag of a candle stick on paper. His other hand settles on your throatânot choking, just securing, owning. Like heâs collaring you, like heâs locking you back in place where you shouldâve been all along.
His voice is low, every syllable laced with quiet fury. âGotta show yâlittle plaything who yâreally belong to, huh?â
Your breath stutters, your pulse hammering beneath his fingertips, but you nod, eyes wide, body betraying you in how quickly you submit. His heat rolls off him in waves, seeping through your flimsy shirt, wrapping around you like a smothering embrace. Itâs too much and not enough all at once.
âWords,â he murmurs, his grip flexingâjust a tease of pressure, just enough to make your stomach drop.
âYes,â you rasp, the word trembling as it falls from your lips.
And then youâre movingâyou donât know how, donât know if he shoved, pulled, or if you just folded for him, but suddenly youâre laid back on the bed, looking up at him.
He towers over you, broad shoulders blotting out everything else, his presence suffocating in the way that makes your lungs tighten and your blood rush south. You stare up at him, and he stares right back, gaze heavy and dark, like heâs been waiting for this.
Like heâs already decided what heâs going to do with you.
Simonâs voice, a low, guttural growl, fills the room. âLook at him,â he commands, his fingers snapping the buckle of his belt. The metallic click echoes, a sharp, ominous sound.
You turn your head to the side, gaze locking onto Keith's. His eyes, wide and terrified, dart between you and Simon's hulking frame. His hands twitch against the restraints, his legs kicking feebly, a desperate, futile struggle.
The leather of Simon's belt snakes through the loops and he tosses it aside, metal clanking on the floor. Then, a sharp tug on your ankles yanks your hips towards the edge of the bed. You gasp, your head whipping back towards Simon, shock and fear battling for dominance in your expression.
But his hand clamps down on your chin, his grip like iron, forcing your gaze back to Keith. He leans over, his lips brushing your ear. âLook at him,â he repeats, his grip tightening. âIf yâso much as blink, if yâlook away, this stops. And we're done.â
The threat hangs in the air. A whimper escapes your lips, a small, broken sound of surrender. ââkay,â you whisper, your voice trembling, your eyes glued to Keith's terrified face. â... OkayâŚâ
The fabric of your panties rasps as he yanks them down, a swift, decisive motion that leaves your pussy bared to his hungry eyes. A gasp escapes your lips, a mix of surprise and a sudden, unwelcome heat blooming between your legs. Without warning, heâs on his knees and his mouth is on you, hot and wet, his tongue a relentless, insistent invasion. He licks and sucks, his ministrations both brutal and exquisitely precise.Â
Instinctively, your eyes flick downwards, seeking his own. His gaze, dark and intense, is already locked on yours, a silent, predatory command. He pauses, his tongue hovering just above your swollen clit, the unspoken threat hanging heavy in the air.
You wrench your gaze back to Keith, your body trembling with a mixture of fear, embarrassment, and arousal. You fight the involuntary arch of your back, the way your face wants to contort in pleasure, the sounds that threaten to spill from your lipsâsounds Keith has never heard, expressions he's never earned. The shame burns, a hot, corrosive acid, mixing with the raw, undeniable pleasure that pulses through you, a traitorous betrayal of your own body.
Simon senses your restraint, the tension that coils within you, the silent battle raging in your soul. It only fuels his desire, a cruel, possessive hunger. He slips his fingers inside you, two, then three, crooking them in a teasing rhythm, stretching you wider and wider.His lips tighten, nearly swallowing your clit, the sensation sending a jolt of electricity through your core. A loud, involuntary whine spills from your lips, a desperate, animalistic sound you can't suppress. Your back arches and you canât help but look at him, your hips lifting off the bed, as he holds your thighs hostage against his shoulders, his mouth and fingers working in tandem, driving you closer and closer to the edge.
Keithâs panting, his chest heaving, still fighting against the restraints. But somethingâs shifted. His struggles are less frantic, less desperate. His eyes are half-lidded, glazed with a sheen of arousal. A flush creeps up his neck, his breath coming in short, rapid bursts. The sight of him, both terrified and aroused, is a brutal contradiction, a twisted reflection of the conflicting emotions tearing you apart.
Simonâs fingers move inside you, stroking your g-spot while his tongue continues its work on your clit, slurping and sucking so lewdly. âMissed this fuckinâ pussy, God,â he murmurs, his voice heady with lust. âNeedy girl, yâtaste so good,â he groans as he makes out with your folds. He thrusts his fingers deeper, his tongue swirling and teasing.Â
âLook at himâ he commands, releasing your clit with a pop, his voice a low growl. âLook at how hard yâmakinâ him, girl. He wants you, donât he? He wants tâbe the one doinâ this tâyou.â
You feel your peak building, the pressure mounting, a wave of sensation threatening to overwhelm you.Â
Your hand instinctively clutches at Simon's cropped hair, your fingers digging into his scalp as the pleasure intensifies. You drag your gaze back to Keith, his body a twisted tableau of arousal and restraint. His hips buck against the chair, a frantic, rhythmic movement, and he gnaws at the rag gagging him, a desperate, muffled sound. His eyes, glazed and dilated, are locked on yours.
You canât handle itâyou tear your gaze away, the weight of his shame, his helplessness, too much to bear. Itâs unbearable, looking at him when the only man youâve ever truly wanted is the one between your legs.
You hate that Keith is watching. Hate the way his eyes track every movement, every shift of your body. But fuckâif it doesnât send a pulse of heat through you, knowing someone is.
You try to look away, to break the connection, but Simon's eyes hold you captive. They're dark, intense, burning. This time, he doesn't force your gaze away. Instead, his eyes silently beckon you, Come, they say, Come in my mouth, baby.
Your orgasm coils low in your belly, winding tighter and tighter, heat licking up your spine like a flame searching for air. It swirls, thick and consuming, a molten ache that makes you want to cry. You arch your back, your body convulsing as you call out his name, a desperate, raw plea that fills the room. A wave of pure pleasure washes over you, and you unravel, gushing into his mouth.
Simon groans, a low, guttural sound of satisfaction, as he savors the taste of your release. Unbeknownst to you, he'd been rhythmically grinding his hips against the edge of the bed throughout your orgasm, his own arousal building each time you clenched around his fingers. He takes his time, meticulously licking you clean, his tongue lingering on your swollen flesh.Â
Eventually, he pulls away from your pussy, but not before slapping your sensitive clit, the sound echoing in the room. The force of the impact sends a jolt of overstimulation through you, a lingering tremor that makes you twitch and gasp. He chuckles at the reaction. Asshole.Â
You instinctively clutch at your shirt, pulling it off, the cool air a stark contrast to the heat still radiating from your core. Your senses are reeling, your body still thrumming with the aftershocks of your orgasm.
He moves to straddle your hips, his large, powerful thighs rooted on either side of your hips, anchoring you beneath him. He leans over you, planting his forearms on either side of your head, effectively caging you. His eyes bore into yours.
The space between you is barely a breath, just the warmth of his exhale mingling with yours. His lips are still slick, shining with the remnants of you, his cheeks streaked with evidence of just how deep he wentâmessy eater. You watch as his gaze flickers down, lingering on your mouth like heâs thinking about it, like he wants it, but he doesnât move.
You mirror him, flicking your gaze from his lips back to his eyes, searching for somethingâan answer, an intention, a reason why heâs hesitating. Your brows pull together, your voice soft, uncertain. âSimon?â
A grunt. Thatâs all he gives you. A quiet, low vibration in his chest, but his eyes stay locked on yours, unreadable, unreadable, unreadable.
Your fingers creep up, threading into the short, soft hair at the base of his skull, anchoring him in place. He doesnât pull away, doesnât stop you, just breathes. His eyes keep flicking down, but he still doesnât close the distance. Itâs unlike him. Unbecoming of him. A man who takes what he wants without hesitationâwhy now, when you're right here, does he stall?
âWon't you kiss me?â The words are barely above a whisper, but they break something in him.
He nods slowly, like itâs unpracticed. Like heâs never done something so intimate before.
He nudges his nose against yours first, like heâs testing the waters, feeling out the moment before he lets himself sink. And thenâhis lips press to yours.
Soft. Gentle. Everything you didnât expect from a man who just slapped your overstimulated cunt.
Your eyes flutter shut as the kiss deepens, slow and unsure. His lips are dewy from where heâs been, the taste of you lingering, and for once, you have to guide himâslowly, patiently molding your lips to his, showing how to do something other than take.
And he lets you.
The kisses start slow, tentative, like heâs learning you. But it doesnât last. Hesitation melts into something more primal, more insatiable, and you canât help but reciprocate. His lips part against yours, and when your tongue brushes against his, he groans low in his throatâdeep, guttural, vibrating against your lips.
It sets something off between you, a chain reaction of need. His hands start to wander, dragging over the curves of your bare skin, rough palms mapping the places heâs missed. His fingers press into your waist, then skate down to your hips, your thighs, then back up again, as if he canât decide where he wants to touch you most.
You arch into him, your body betraying you, craving the heat, the weight of him. His touch grows firmer, his grip tightening like he needs to feel you under his hands to prove that youâre real, that this isnât just a fever dream.
Somewhere between gasps and swallowed moans, he pulls back just enough to yank his shirt over his head, revealing broad shoulders and a torso carved from marble. Heâs still in just his boxers now, and itâs almost unfairâthe contrast between his near-nakedness and your own, how heâs still clothed while you have nothing left to hide.
But then his eyes rake over you, his tongue flicking out to wet his lips, gaze dark and full of intent. He reaches out, slow, reverent, fingers tracing the dip between your collarbones before sliding lower, down the valley of your ribs, spreading warmth everywhere he touches.
âFuckinâ beautiful,â he murmurs, voice rough, eyes locked onto yours like youâre the only thing in the world worth looking at.
You smile bashfully before your eyes flick to the corner, catching movementâor rather, the absence of it. Keith.
Youâd once again forgotten he was still here.
Heâs unnaturally silent, his breath shallow, his body frozen. But even in the dim glow of the room, you see itâthe damp patch spreading across the front of his sleep shorts, dark and unmistakable.
He came in his pants.
Something cold prickles down your spine, a mix of disgust and something else, something twisted. The shame on his face is unbearable, carved into every trembling breath, every flicker of his glassy eyes. His face is utterly wrecked, drained of any fight, any defiance. Like he already knows heâs lost. Like he knew it the second tied him up.Â
Simon follows your gaze as he gets off of you and leans back against the headboard, legs spread, arms resting lazily at his sides. His gaze flicks between you and Keith, amusement curling at the edges of his lips. He scoffs, shaking his head as he watches the pathetic, trembling mess still tied up in the corner.
âJizzed his pants? Christ.â His voice is dripping with disgust, but thereâs something else there tooâsomething utterly pleased. Like Keithâs shame only serves to highlight his own triumph.
Your breath is still uneven as you turn back to Simon, watching the way his fingers stroke absentmindedly over his own stomach, dangerously close to the waistband of his boxers. He exhales slowly through his nose, then lifts his hand, trailing fingers up into your hair, brushing over your cheek in one slow, deliberate stroke.
The touch is gentle. And maybe itâs that contrast, the tenderness hidden beneath all that violence, that makes you instinctively lean into his palm, nuzzling against it like you belong there.
Something flickers in his expressionâsomething unreadable, something deep. But itâs gone just as quick as it came, masked behind an air of satisfaction. He stretches, cracks his neck, and then settles back against the pillows, arms behind his head, looking up at you with expectation.
âGo on then,â he murmurs, patting his upper thigh. âGive the bloke a reason tâcry.â
You glance at Keith again, slumped against the chair in the corner, his face burning with ignominy, his breaths uneven. His teary eyes are flicking between you and Simon, his hands twitching in his restraints like he doesn't know whether to cover himself or reach out for something that will never belong to him.
Simon watches you, tracking every flicker of emotion across your face. He tilts your chin toward him. His grip is firm, but not forcefulâjust enough to remind you of what he expects.
âCâmon, pet,â he drawls, his thumb tracing slow circles at the hinge of your jaw. âLet âem see what he was never gonna have.â
 You don't hesitate, your body moving eagerly. Simon reclines, his fingers already toying with the elastic waistband of his briefs, a silent invitation. You crawl over him, straddling his hips, the rough fabric of his briefs a stark contrast to the slick heat between your legs. You settle your bare, slick cunt onto his clothed cock, a kaleidoscope of butterflies shooting through your core as you feel the girth of him beneath you.
Now, your back is to Keith. You can't see his face, but you can imagine the look that must be twisting his features. Simonâs enjoying the spectacle, reveling in the power he holds as he cucks him.
And, you admit to yourself, a dark, shameful part of you enjoys it too. The knowledge that Keith is forced to watch, to witness it all, fuels a perverse excitement, a thrill that makes you slicker than Simonâs touch alone does. The realization is sickening, but exhilarating.
Simonâs hands grip your hips, guiding your movements, urging you to grind against the clothed length of his erection. The fabric of his boxers, rough against your swollen clit, sends a jolt of pleasure through you, eliciting a soft mewl from your throat. His cock twitches beneath you, a hard, insistent pulse, and he hisses at the rhythm of your grinding, a low, guttural sound of barely contained desire.
You meet his gaze, your eyes wide and seemingly innocent, your hands resting lightly on his chest. âCan I fuck you now? P⌠please?â you ask, your voice soft, almost pleading.
âFuck, sweets,â he growls, his voice thick with lust. âTake itâit's yours.â He pushes his boxers down to his knees, and with your eager assistance, reveals the full, throbbing length of him. He cups his cock in his hands, pumping it lazily, his eyes fixed on the way it reaches just below your belly button. A low groan rumbles in his chest. âFuckinâ hell,â he breathes, his voice ragged.
He reaches for your hips, helping you lift them, guiding you as you position yourself above him. The anticipation is a tangible thing, a thick, heavy tension that fills the room as you slowly lower yourself onto him.
You hesitate, hovering above him, the anticipation a sharp, almost painful thrum in your core. Then you lower yourself onto him. The initial stretch is intense, a sharp, almost burning sensation that elicits a low moan from your throat. You bite your lip, bracing yourself, as you take him inch by agonizing inch, savoring the feeling of his thick length filling you, stretching you wide. A whimper escapes your lips, a sound that's both a cry of discomfort and a raw expression of pleasure.
He feels impossibly large, impossibly full, as if he's somehow grown even bigger since the last time. It's an overwhelming sensation, a raw, visceral fullness that borders on pain, yet is laced with an undeniable, addictive pleasure. It's the ultimate release, the scratching of an itch you didn't know you had.
When you finally take him all, a guttural groan erupts from Simonâs throat. His hands grip your hips, his fingers digging into your ass, kneading and urging you on. His eyes, dark and possessive, are fixed on you, watching every movement, every subtle shift of your body. âLook at that,â he murmurs, his voice thick with desire. âLook how you take me. So fucking tight.â His gaze lingers on the way his cock distends your abdomen, stretching your skin to its limit, a visible testament to his size.
Too lost in the pleasure, you barely register Simon's occasional, smug glances towards Keith, the subtle shifts in his expression as he watches.Â
You begin to ride him, slowly at first, savoring the feeling of him filling you, stretching you, the friction building with each rise and fall of your hips. The rhythm quickens, escalating as your body adjusts to his impressive girth, the pace becoming more frantic, more desperate.
The room fills with a cacophony of sounds: the slick slap of skin against skin, the wet, gasping moans that escape your lips, Simonâs rough whispers, a torrent of the dirtiest words imaginable, painting the air with sex. And beneath it all, Keith's muffled whines, the rhythmic bucking of his hips against the restraints, a constant, jarring counterpoint to your pleasure, a stark reminder of how heâs watching.Â
The muscles in your thighs begin to tremble, a burning ache that spreads with each thrust. The sensory overload, a chaotic mix of the lingering aftershocks of your previous orgasm, the constant, invasive feel of Keithâs eyes on you, Simonâs roaming hands, and the insistent, stretching pressure of his cock, begins to push you past your limits. His pubes, coarse and rough, scrapes against your swollen clit, sending jolts of raw, almost painful pleasure through you. It's too much, a tidal wave threatening to drown you.
Simon senses it all, the subtle shift in your rhythm, the way your breath hitches and catches the way the sodden walls of your cunt clench around him. His hands grip your hips, his fingers digging into your flesh, and he stills your movements, halting your grinding just as you teeter on the edge. He holds you suspended, your bodies locked together, the tension building to an almost unbearable degree.
Simon pulls you close, your foreheads touching, your breaths mingling in the humid air. Both of you are slick with sweat, your bodies still thrumming with the aftershocks of your shared climax. He murmurs, his voice surprisingly gentle, âDo you trust me?â
You nod, the affirmation barely a twitch of your head, your trust in him a strange, almost instinctive thing.
With a sudden, almost effortless movement, he lifts you off his cock, setting you aside on the bed as if you weigh nothing. He rises to his knees, his eyes dark and intense, and grabs you again, manhandling you onto your stomach. Your chest presses flat against the mattress, your ass raised high in the air, and yourâre directly in sight of Keith
You clutch at the bed sheets beneath you, your knuckles white, as you brace yourself. You feel Simon's hand smooth over your ass, the touch both possessive and caring. Then, two sharp, stinging slaps land on either ass cheek, making you jolt. A gasp escapes your lips, but beneath the sting, a traitorous heat blooms between your legs, your cunt leaking.
He leans over you, his cock pressing flush against your ass, hard chest against your back, the heat radiating from him. He rasps in your ear, âHeâs gonna watch, sweetheart. Heâs gonna watch as I fuck yâtill yâbrains leak out yâears, ainât that right?â He continues. You whimper, a small, broken sound of acceptance, your body trembling.
Keith looks utterly defeated, his face a mask of exhaustion and a strange, twisted arousal. The dark stain on his shorts has grown exponentially. A flicker of guilt pierces through the haze of your cock-drunk stupor. A pang of remorse, a whisper of conscience, tries to surface, but itâs quickly swallowed by the need that simmers within you. The shame is there, but itâs overshadowed by the throbbing between your legs.
You're repulsed by the situation, by the violation of Keith, by the way Simon is using him to make a pointâas a pawn in this twisted game. Yet a shameful part of you revels in the power, in the dominance that Simon exudes.Â
Simon leans back, his eyes dark and predatory, and grabs his cock, circling your entrance with the slick, glistening tip. He teases you, the anticipation stretching the moment into an unbearable eternity. âWhat do we say, hmm?â he murmurs, his voice a low, dangerous purr. âWhen we want something?â
Your face is half-smushed against the bed, the rough fabric digging into your cheek, and a muffled plea escapes your lips. âPlease,â you whisper, the word barely audible.
He continues to torment you, the tip of his cock dipping in and out of your swollen entrance, each teasing touch sending a jolt of desperate need through your body. A string of pleas spills from your lips, âPlease, Siââ you beg, your voice thick with desire. âPleaseâI need itâ I need youââ
Simonâs eyes gleam with cruel amusement as he watches your desperation. âAwh, baby,â he drawls, his voice dripping with mockery. âDon't ask me. Iâm not the one yâneed to convince.â He hums.
He reaches out, his hand weaving through your scalp wrapping around your hair, and he yanks it back sharply, forcing your head into an unnatural, painful angle. Your neck strains, and your eyes are forced upwards, locking directly with Keithâs.
âAsk him,â Simon commands, his voice a low, menacing growl.
Your eyes meet Keith's, and you whisper, your voice thick with shame and desperation, a string of broken pleas.
Simon's grip tightens on your hair. âSay it proper, pet,â he instructs, his voice hard. âSay, âPlease let Simon fuck me, Keith.ââ
You instantly repeat the words, verbatim, the phrase a humiliating echo of his command. Unshed tears prick at your eyes, threatening to spill if Simon so much as grazes your clit again.
Keith looks between you both, his gaze shifting between your prettily arched body and Simon's monstrous, towering figure behind you. A flicker of something that might be resignation crosses his face. He nods lazily, a slow, almost imperceptible movement.
Simon smirks, a triumphant, possessive expression twisting his lips. He releases your hair, the sudden freedom making your head loll forward. âSee what happens when you ask nicely?â he murmurs, his voice laced with a dark satisfaction.
And then, without further delay, he inches in, the head of his cock pressing against your swollen entrance.
He slides into you, the angle intensifying the stretch, filling you even deeper than before. The sheer size of him steals your breath, the slow, deliberate intrusion forcing the air from your lungs. You claw at the sheets beneath you, your knuckles white, tears wetting the fabric.
He grunts as he sheaths himself fully, then pulls back before plunging in again. He watches as your cunt clenches and drools around him, sucking him in with a desperate, hungry grip. âGreedy pussy,â he growls, his voice thick with lust. âSheâs so fuckinâ greedy.â
You whine, a broken, helpless sound, your body trapped beneath him, forced to endure his thrusts. There's no escape, no reprieve, only the overwhelming sensation of him filling you, stretching you, dominating you.
Gradually, he picks up the pace, the rhythm becoming faster, more brutal. You howl, your drool soaking the sheets beneath your face. Heâs hitting spots you didn't know existed, stretching you to the brim, the feeling bordering on unbearable. You can barely focus, your vision blurred by tears, the world reduced to the relentless pounding of his cock, the wet squelches from your pussy, and the raw, visceral sensations that rip through your body.
Each thrust forces a wheeze of air from your lungs, a sound that more closely resembles a death rattle than a moan. Your whole body is ablaze, and heâs the one who struck the matchâwatching as you burn, as the flames lick higher, consuming everything in their path.
Simon suddenly hauls you upward, his hand looping around your upper chest, pulling you flush against his sweat-slicked chest. His hips donât falter as they continue to snap into you, your body arching involuntarily with each powerful stroke. His other hand grips your waist, anchoring you, while he leans into the crook of your neck, sucking on the sensitive skin there.
Your entire body, a raw, exposed spectacle, is laid bare before Keith. Your mouth hangs slack-jawed, your tits bouncing with each rapid, violent thrust that jolts through your frame. Even though heâs seen you naked before, heâs never witnessed you like this: so utterly debased, so completely at someoneâs mercy.
Heâs never seen anyone like this.
Simon licks a slow, deliberate stripe from your neck to your ear, his tongue tracing a path of fire across your skin, all while continuing to fuck you, his rhythm unwavering. Youâre limp in his arms, your head lolling back, your eyes rolling towards the back of your head. The pleasure is so overwhelming, so intense, that you can barely even manage a sound, your vocal cords paralyzed by the raw sensation.
He harshly whispers in your ear, his voice a low, guttural growl, âYâgonna cum,? Can feel yâclenchinâ âround meâfuck, yâso tight, babyââ
You manage a garbled, broken attempt at a âyes,â your voice thick with unspeakable pleasure.
âGood,â he murmurs. ââM close too and yâgonna take it allâ Gonna fill this cunnyâfuck,â He pauses, his voice hardening, âAnd yâbetter not take a fuckingâ Plan B this time.â
The words, a brutal reminder of your vulnerability, snap the last vestiges of your control. A wave of raw, unadulterated pleasure crashes over you, unlike anything you've ever experienced. You gush, your orgasm violent as you squirt, your release spraying across his cock and the sheets.
He continues to fuck you, his thrusts relentless as he chases his own high, his hands squeezing your tits, urging you on. âAtta girl,â he grunts, his voice thick with lust.
You go limp, your body leaning against him, your mind a blank canvas of pure sensation. Then, with a final, shuddering groan, he empties himself inside you, filling you to the brim, his cum a hot, pulsing tide that leaves you feeling utterly spent.
He stills, holding you close, his arms supporting you. Heâs truly fucked you senseless, leaving you a shell of your former self.
Slowly, gently, he pulls out of you, the withdrawal leaving a strange, hollow ache. He lays you on your side, his touch surprisingly tender, and presses a soft kiss to your shoulder. You let him, your body and mind too exhausted to offer any resistance.
He rises, his movements fluid and predatory, and stalks towards Keith. From your position on the bed, you can see the hard planes of his naked form, a stark, imposing figure standing before the bound man. He speaks, his voice low and menacing, the words barely audible. Keith looks up at him, his eyes wide with fear.
Then, with a casual flick of his wrist, Simon retrieves a knife heâd apparently left on your desk, the blade glinting in the dim light. He swiftly cuts through the ropes binding Keith, freeing him from his restraints.
Within seconds, Keith scrambles to his feet, his movements frantic and desperate. He doesn't look back, doesn't offer a word of explanation or apology. He simply runs, fleeing the house as if pursued by demons.
You lie there, your body still thrumming with the aftershocks of Simon's brutal possession, your mind struggling to process the scene. You don't know what Simon said to Keith, but the fear in the other man's eyes, the sheer urgency of his escape, speaks volumes. It couldn't have been anything good.
The front door slams shut, the echo reverberating through the quiet house. The sound of hurried, stumbling footsteps fades into the night. Keith is gone.
Simon exhales through his nose, slow and deliberate, before setting the knife down exactly where he had left it earlier. The metal clinks against the wood, sharp and final.
You havenât moved.
Your body still hums, every nerve alight, the aftershocks of everything thatâs just happened still pulsing through you. Your heart slams against your ribs, beating an erratic rhythm you canât quite slow down.
Then, warmthâsolid, steady, unshakable.
Simon sidles in behind you, his presence swallowing yours whole. One thick arm loops around your waist, the other sliding up to your sternum, pulling you back into his chest, into his heat. You donât resist. You donât even think to.
He presses his chin to your shoulder, his breath warm as it fans across your skin. His grip is firm, possessive, like heâs afraid youâll disappear if he lets go.
âStill with me, love?â he murmurs, voice rough, threaded with something unreadable.
You swallow hard, blinking yourself back into the present. Your fingers twitch at your sides, unsure whether to push him away or pull him closer.
You choose the latter. Your hands settle over his arms, feeling the solid muscle beneath your palms, the way he holds you like you belong to him.
You hum in response, soft and instinctive, nuzzling just slightly deeper into the warmth of his chest. Itâs comforting in a way you donât fully understandâhow you can feel so at ease wrapped up in the arms of a man who is anything but safe.
Your fingers trace idle patterns along the skin of his forearm, feeling the scars, the ridges, the history carved into him. You tilt your head slightly, voice still a little breathless as you ask, âWhat did you say to him?â
Simon chuckles. âTold âem if he so much as breathed a word about this, Iâd track him down, carve his tongue out, and mail it tâhis mother. After I made him swallow his teeth, oâ course.â
Your eyes widen. âJesus Christ.â
âAt least I didnât go with my original plan.â
You hesitate, blinking, your heart skipping. âWhat plan?â
Simon leans in, his lips brushing the shell of your ear as he murmurs, completely unbothered, âKillinâ him. Tossinâ his sorry corpse into the Thames.â
A beat of silence.
ââŚOh.â
Simon laughsâan actual laugh, deep and rumbling, like you just told the funniest joke in the world.
And itâs only now, sitting here, still bare against his heat, his arms caging you in, his scent thick in your lungs, that you remember heâs still a criminal.
Simon holds you close, his chin resting against the top of your head, arms locked around you like he has no intention of letting go. His body is warm, steadyâlike he belongs here, like you belong here.
Then, quietly, he murmurs, âYâmine now.â
You let out a small chuckle. âYeah, I got that part.â
His chest vibrates with a quiet laugh, one of his hands slowly dragging up and down your arm, fingertips tracing your skin like heâs memorizing you. Itâs gentleâtoo much so for a man like him.
You shift just enough to glance at the analog clock on your nightstand. The dim glow of the numbers makes your stomach sink.
âShit.â
Simon hums in question.
âSunâs coming up,â you sigh, rubbing your face, âand I have work in three hours.â
He doesnât even pause. âNah, yâdonât.â
You let out a tired laugh. âThat so?â
âMhm.â He pulls back slightly, just enough to look down at you, his eyes dark and sure. âTold you. Yâmine. That means yâdonât have tâwork.â
You blink up at him, frowning. âSimon, I have a life here. A job, a flat. I canât just give it up.â
He shrugs, lips twitching. âIâll get your lease terminated.â
 You turn to face him in his embrace. âWithout penalties?â
His smirk is slow, lazy. âDonât worry about it.â
You stare at him, not even bothering to ask what that means. You already know. You also know youâre too damn tired to fight about it.
With a long exhale, your fingers trace the pink scar just below his collarbone. âWhere would we even go?â
Being best friends with a military man, poor guys been gone forever. Focused on the work ahead and his training. Until finally he is able to see me again but he's not the same during his visit. He feels so lonely, everyone around him seems to have a picture perfect family. He wants that, he wants in.
Visiting him in the prettiest outfit, yapping away about our friends, and what has been happening. He's just nodding along until behind me he sees one of his buddies, He's with his pregnant wife. Suddenly I'm getting dragged into an empty area. Why are we here? I ask as I look around the room is full of extra things, storage probably. then I finally notice his face. What's wrong?... I step closer and he shakes his head. You trust me...right? He also steps closer and I nod. Of course I do! I smile at him and giggle, you're my best friend.
You find me handsome? Yeah! You wouldn't mind being by my side? Of course not! So you'd forgive me if I hurt you? I look at him confused, I guess so...what is this about? He looks at me torn before I'm getting pushed onto a dusty bed. Ow! Hey! He's on me ripping my tights and pushing my skirt up. What are you- he covers my mouth. I know...I know I should've done this better. I struggle under him as he talks but it's nothing to him with all his training. He's handling me easily with one hand and his weight as the other hand works on pulling out his cock.
He looks into my teary eyes as he runs his tip along my cunt. I'm sorry...but I know we both need this. You dream of the farm house and I feel so alone, he whimpers as he pushes in. I start to sniffle at the suddenness, I wasn't ready. I would've taken you on a date first, sweetened you up, and given you the most romantic night. But we don't have time for that baby...not today. I have to leave again soon and I need to you to be here for me when I come back. Either with a baby on your hip or round with one.
I stop fighting against him, this is so wrong. I didn't feel hurt from him taking me like this, I wanted it too. His thrust are deep and he makes sure of it as I get wetter. See? You like this, it's getting easier...it's always been us and it will always be us. I'll have a ring on that finger as soon as possible. He's tearing up and he keeps fucking me. I'm so sorry it had to be like this, he removed his hand to kiss me. I'll make it up to you, he whispers and starts rubbing my clit. I'll always be here for you, even if I had to be mean for a second. Just really needed this ...no other woman could please me. All I would think about is you, and everyone is so happy. He starts to cry and I grab his face, it's okay just keep fucking me.
Those words flip a switch inside him, nodding his head and fucking me rough. I cover my mouth as my eyes roll back. I can't believe it came down to this, he moans. And you barely fucking struggled against this, against the idea of being force bred by me. He forces and orgasm out of me but keeps fucking me. Lifting my thick hips to a different angle, I didn't think his cock could hit deeper. Liking the idea of being forced to be my house wife, he's close as he starts to pant. I'm going to cum deep in this cunt...make sure it sticks...make our dreams come true. Threat or a promise? I didn't care.
âBottom of the Riverâ and âDance in the Graveyardâ by Delta Rae
âFallingâ by First State
âLike a Stoneâ by Audioslave
âMilk and Cookiesâ by Melanie Martinez
âThe Railway Houseâ by Patrick Wolf
âBlack Velvetâ by Alannah Myles
Seven Devils - Florence + The Machine
O Death - Jen Titus
I Will Never Die - Delta Rae
The Host of Seraphim - Dead Can Dance
The Humbling River - Puscifer
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Summary: Astarion asks a pregnant Tav to marry him and settle down for a bit. Can be read as a stand alone story!
Word count: 2.1k
Pairing: Spawn!Astarion x F!Tav / Reader
Link to Part 1
Link to Ao3
My Masterlist
Warnings: 18+! Explicit! Astarion being a perv for pregnant Tav! Pregnancy kink. Breeding kink. PiV. Vaginal fingering. Cunnilingus. Body worship. Panty sniffing. Mention of body changes, symptoms of pregnancy.
A/N: Do y'all want more of these two? because I have more. I hope you enjoy!
You and your beloved continue to travel and work. Despite being expert adventures, you both had decided on taking low risk journeys and dealings. You were lucky to have found an enchanted ring long ago, one that allowed your vampire to walk in the sun, so there was no disruption to your living schedule.
Astarion insisted that you take it easy, and had even wanted you to stop traveling altogether, but he could only get you to acquiesce to directly participating in battles.
But you were starting to get rather big, and you werenât so quick or nimble as you once were. The extra weight was daunting on you.
You are nearing the end of your pregnancy, now.
âDarling, you know Iâm not one forâŚtradition, or convention, or any of that,â Astarion said one day as he massages your swollen hands. You were propped up in bed, your legs draped over Astarion's lap as he sat upright, working the fluids out with his strong digits. It was hard work, growing a baby, and strange things happened, like swollen hands. âBut, I was reading something the other dayâŚâ
âOh?â
âIn one of my romance novelsâŚyou know the ones,â Astarion admits coyly, and you smile, nodding because he had shared this guilty pleasure with you before. âIn one of them, the love interest wanted the mother of his child to share the same surname as their offspring. And he, the love interest, wanted to also shareâŚthis last name with them.â
You raise an eyebrow.
âWhat do you think of that?â Astarion inquires coquettishly, turning on an almost boyish, shy charm that makes your heart swoon.
âI think itâs romantic. The love interest wants his family united, and I think thatâs lovely,â You say. âWhat do you think about it, Astarion?â
âI think I want that. With you.â Astarion turns your hand in his, pressing a kiss to your knuckles. âI donât care to do it traditionally, I just want you to be mine. Iâve already talked to Wyll.â
Astarion moves your legs off his lap onto the bed, moving for his things across your suite. The two of you were quite wealthy at this point, and had found a lovely little inn to stay in outside of Athkatla, the capital of Amn.
Astarion produces an envelope, pulling out the papers inside before handing them over to you. Astarion, not having the patience for you to actually look them over, tells you that it is the paperwork for an annulment of his death certificate, an official acknowledgement of the destruction of a previous marriage, and a marriage license â
âWait a minute,â You stop him.
Astarion has an âIâve been caughtâ look on his face. âUgh, I had hoped youâd just ignore that part I sandwiched in there.â
You knit your eyebrows together, shaking your head at him. âIâm no stranger to your âsandwichâ tactics, Astarion,â You quip back. âA previous marriage?â
âOne that I have no memory of and was contractually destroyed upon my first death. Now that Iâm legally alive again, and they are still alive, itâs just to acknowledge that marriage is no longer legitimate, so that our marriage is.â
âOh,â You say, digesting these two things at once; Astarion had an ex-husband or wife, and he was asking you to marry him right now.
âI figured we could go back to Baldurâs Gate for a while, get Wyllâs stamp of approval, and there was that midwife Shadowheart suggested to usâŚâ Astarion trailed off, his mind wandering at all the things there was to do. âYou should probably get a check up. It's been a while, darling, and my 'inspections' of you are hardly medical in nature.â
You give him a gentle smack on the shoulder, prompting a handsome smirk from him before you narrow your eyes at him. You knew he was going to tell you that now was the time to settle down. You knew it was coming.
âDonât look at me like that. Not after what Iâve just asked of you.â His rounded eyes look away from you, like heâs embarrassed.
You change your tune, realizing youâre being a jackass. You ease yourself out of bed, Astarion rushing to help you. You take his arm, and once on your feet, you place your hands on his chest, looking up at him as he looks away from your cleavage, meeting your gaze.
âAstarion, of course Iâll marry you,â You say with a smile, bringing him into a tender kiss. Astarion cups your cheek with one hand and a breast with another: he has become rather obsessed with them lately.
âI guess Iâm just not ready for our grand adventure to end.â You explain, tears in your eyes as you think about all the change thatâs to come.
Astarion cradles you closer. âMy love, this is just the start of a new adventure. And letâs be reasonable, we both know youâre terribly uncomfortable with all the traveling. Donât you want to just rest your tired, but very sexy body for the last part of your pregnancy, my darling?â
You couldnât help but agree.
Heâs being cheeky, trying to hide the tears that have welled up in his eyes. Astarion has never known family. He couldnât fathom having a wife, nonetheless a pregnant one. But here he was, with the object of his desire in his arms.
âI love you so much, Tav. I just want you and our child to be safe.â Astarion says. âBaldurâs Gate is the safest place for us. All of our friends are there, we have ample protection and resources â donât make me beg.â
Youâre back in Baldurâs Gate before you know it.
âââ
The night you arrive, you and Astarion stay at Jaheiraâs house; the two of you are utterly exhausted from your travels, and you collapse in bed.
Astarion watches as you lie on your side, trying to find a pillow to place beneath your large, aching belly. Realizing how little options you had, Astarion lies beside you, snaking his hand beneath your belly.
âAh,â You say in relief, earning a smile from Astarion, who just wanted you to be comfortable. He had seen how hard your pregnancy had been.
âI guess itâs alright if you use my pillow, darling. I wouldnât be opposed to staying just like this, though.â Astarionâs voice is light and gentle, the smoothness filing your ears in a pleasurable way. âWe have a long day tomorrow. Weâll likely be at the courthouse all dayâŚâ
Astarion shivers at the thought, giving a dramatic sigh, making you laugh.
âCould you imagine going back to that? Being a magistrate? Spending all day in the courtroom settling legal disputes and passing âAstarion approvedâ laws?â You smile over your shoulder at him; a perfect opportunity to steal a sweet kiss, Astarion plants one on your cheek as he chuckles.
âNo, certainly not. I love being an adventurer with you.â Astarion places another kiss on you, this time to your neck. âBut I may have to find something to do in the meantime while our little one isâŚwell, little.â
âWhat do you have in mind?â You ask as you intertwine your fingers with his, the warmth in your chest nearly bringing tears to your eyes.
âIâve got a few options. You know that Jaheira wants me to help her recruit more Harpers in the city, but that sounds like far more trouble than itâs worth. Maybe Iâll work in the city with Wyll, continuing to help with the various outreach programs he's implemented as Duke," Astarion explains as he listens to the beating of the hearts of both his child and his beloved.
He can tell once you've fallen asleep, but he keeps talking, because he can feel the fluttering in your stomach as his child responds to his voice.
It takes everything in him not to choke up.
---
The next day, you try look as beautiful and bridal as you can being so heavily pregnant. But today was the day youâd become an AncunĂn, and you wanted to look nice.
âA pregnant bride is so very scandalous,â Astarion teased as he watched you dress. Your husband-to-be was a bit of a peeping tom.
Astarion picks up last nights panties you discarded on the floor.
âTsk tsk. You canât be so messy, my wife.â Astarion was testing the word on his tongue, bringing the fabric that absorbed your carnal scent to his nose, inhaling as he gazed at you devilishly.
You blush, rolling your eyes at him as you slip on a new pair, but Astarion stops you, beckoning you to him.
Astarion sits on the edge of your bed, bringing your body between his thighs as his pretty lips circle the tip of your breast, gently suckling your nipple as he flicks his tongue against you.
âSo sensitiveâŚâ You moan, but you make no motion to move away, so Astarion doesnât stop.
âMmm,â He moans back, his hand moving from the curve of your belly to your slick mound, which was also increasingly sensitive as you got further in your pregnancy.
Astarion tenderly massages the folds of your cunt, easing a finger between your walls as he brings his thumb to caress your swollen clitoris, the very one that he was dreaming of devouring with his tongue after he gave your gorgeous breasts the proper attention they deserved, of course.
Astarion loved you like this. Swollen with his child, evidence of being filled to the brim with his come. His sensitive nose could smell your âbabyâ hormones that made your skin glow, made your hair thick and shiny.
It made him ravenous. You were absolutely gorgeous to Astarion.
He couldnât even believe it, really. It had been nearly seven months since the two of you found out, seven months of adventuring, of watching your body change, and it awakened something within him.
Although you often complained how swollen you felt, Astarion loved the way you looked: your nipples and labia puffy, clit engorged, your ringed muscle puckered, your stomach rounded and full.
Not to mention how desperate you were for him; you quivered under his every touch. You were just so responsive, so sensitive, like your every nerve was on fire for him; he couldnât help but indulge you whenever possible. He just wanted to touch you, to watch you squirm, to look at your body and know that you, your womb, is his.
Astarion stands up and gently pushes your back against a wall as he moves to get on his knees, lifting a thigh up and to the side as he kisses down your inflated stomach.
Reaching up to take a breast in his hand, Astarion brings his mouth to your center, engaging your core with his lips. He brings your folds into his mouth, sucking and caressing your sex with his tongue.
He just wants to worship your body. He needs just a taste of you, of your depths, and he plunges his tongue between your folds, gathering your juices on his lips before focusing on that sensitive bundle of nerves at the top of your mound.
Youâre delicious, beautiful and maternal, pliant in his hands as he reaches two fingers into your depths, reaching behind your clitoris to rub your spongey walls. His motions have you seeing white, causing your breasts to heave and bounce as your body clenches around his dexterous fingers.
He loves the way you drag your fingers through his hair; feeling your nails on his scalp sends shivers throughout his body.
Astarion pulls away as you come undone, watching as you writhe above him. Astarion is fully holding you up with his strong hands, making him feel like quite the family man at this moment, physically carrying both his bride and his child in his hands.
He still canât believe this.
Astarion brings the both of you to the bed, stripping his clothes off as you get comfortable, maneuvering yourself for his entry.
Being so large, you couldnât lie on your back anymore, and riding him was far too difficult, so you opted to bend yourself over, putting pillows beneath you in all the right places to ensure your comfort.
Astarion moans at the sight of you exposing yourself to him.
âFucking yes, my love. Youâre so beautiful, Tav.â Astarion grasps his wet cock. Heâs dripping with so much pre-cum that heâs almost surprised, and he uses it to wet his member, which so desperately needs to be inside of you. "If I could just keep you like this forever..."
Astarion pulls back his foreskin with his thrusting motions, moving the skin up and down his shaft, groaning as he admires you.
Parting your folds with his finger and thumb, Astarion lines himself up with your entrance before enveloping himself into your warmth, earning a gasp from him at the sensation.
âGods, you feel even tighter, Tav, with my child in youâŚâ Astarion drifts off, the squelching and slapping of skin on skin making him entirely forget himself.
Astarion felt your waves of pleasure wash over you as you coiled around the base of his cock. With two fingers, Astarion massages that sweet button of yours, causing you to gush even harder around him, your orgasm evident in your entire being: you cried his name as you convulsed around him, giving him your milky come.
Astarion followed soon after, releasing his seed deep inside you as he spoke a love confession in your ear. Careful not to collapse on top of you, Astarion rolled over, giving you space to catch your breath.
Your muscles were already exhausted, fatigued from pregnancy and your spasming muscles. Astarion starts to mindlessly rub your back as you lay on your side, giggling as he draws you into his chest.
âWell, now Iâve got to fix myself,â You say, moving to stand before Astarion pulls you back into him.
âMaybe you should go just like this. Full belly, looking freshly fucked and used by your husband-to-be.â Astarion kisses your cheek, nuzzling his nose into your face as he does.
âHa. Youâd like that, wouldnât you?â You giggle as your beloved finally releases you. Once youâve fixed your makeup and properly dressed yourselves, the two of you walk out into the streets of Baldurâs Gate, hand in hand.
A few hours later, you would be known as Tav AncunĂn, and your stomach leapt with joy at the thought. It wouldnât be long, now.
Summary: Years after the defeat of the Netherbrain, Astarion and Tav discover they are pregnant.
link to ao3!
Part 2
Pairing: Spawn!Astarion x Female Tav/Reader
Word Count: 1.8k
Warning: 18+. Mention of breeding. breast milk. pregnancy. Astarion being very horny for all these things. body worship. angst. changes in POV focus. brief mention of abortion.
A/N: I'm totally going to write more about these two. I need a pregnant adventuring Tav and protective Astarion.
You had been cleaning off your armor after a long day of running errands for Jaheira and the Harperâs when you notice Astarionâs eyes on you.
You could feel his stare, and as you turn to meet it, the look on his face is peculiar, somewhere between shock and amusement.Â
âDarling?â You ask, stopping your task to fully soak in his expression. âAstarion -â
âItâs nothing, my love, nothing,â His voice is dismissive, waving his hand as he tries to push beyond whatever he has been thinking.Â
You notice his ruby eyes donât leave yours for the rest of the evening. You canât help but feel as though your vampire is avoiding you.Â
But you decide to give him his space: this was often the remedy for Astarionâs mood swings.Â
***
Astarion couldnât figure it out.Â
You had rarely left his side for the past few years. When would you have had the time to steal away with another man?Â
Astarion wondered who he was, what he looked like.Â
He curses. Why hadnât he ever picked up the scent of this mystery man? His smell would have been all over your body.
And Astarion knew his nose was working just fine: your change in smell had been the very first thing he picked up on. Astarion certainly thought it strange, but he chalked it up to a weird diet. The two of you had been running through the wastes of Rashemen, and you had eaten a questionable animal that one night.Â
No, it wasnât that, Astarion was certain. That little flutter of a quickening he had heard earlier couldnât be denied. Even though you were just on the other side of the wall, Astarion could hear the gentle thrum of two heartbeats.Â
He sighs, running his hands through his curls. Heâs certain that you donât know. You werenât good at hiding things, and you rarely attempted to lie anyways because you are such a sweetheart that it didnât make any sense at all for you to have bed with another man and cause Astarion pain like this.
Astarion knows he just needs to talk to you, but for the unlife of him, can't figure out where to even remotely begin. Pregnancy and childbirth wasâŚhe didnât even want to think about it.
A child? He canât even really fathom having one around.
Astarion sits up, having found the resolve to finally confront you, and finds you on the porch of Jaheriaâs estate, your eyes mindlessly scanning the streets of Baldurâs Gate.
Astarion takes your image before interrupting whatever thought you were having: you were a vision, a rare beauty that Astarion was so lucky to find.Â
He swears his heart flutters for you sometimes. âDo you like being back in the city?â
You nearly jump, startled by the question.Â
âSorry, darling,â Astarion murmurs in apology.
You smile, laughing a bit as you collect yourself. âI do. Itâs nice to see it all back together. The rebuilding efforts took longer than expected,âÂ
Astarion fears youâre going to keep talking about the mundane when all he can focus on is the beat of that little heart and how round and plump your breasts look beneath that blouse.
Astarion swears youâve never filled out before; not like that.
âYouâre staring again,â You say, your voice barely above a whisper. Astarion can see the worry in your face. âJust tell me, Astarion.â
Astarion swallows. âWell,â Astarion stumbles, rolling his eyes at himself as he tries to find his words. This hurt more than he thought it would. âYouâre with child, Tav.â
***
Youâre speechless.Â
âIâd rather like to know who the father is.â Astarionâs eyes are round, wet, tears already lining them. He blinks them back quickly, trying to compose himself. He almost seemed surprised by his sudden lack of control of his handsome face.
âWhat?â You ask incredulously.Â
âIâve been trying to imagine him, to think about when you could haveâŚâ He stops himself, swallowing his upset before continuing to ramble: he keeps talking, stumbling while youâre still processing what he just said.
You interrupt him.âYouâre saying that Iâm pregnant?âÂ
âYes.â
Youâre silent for a while. You can feel Astarionâs nerves fraying at the seams, his emotions emanating through him, producing an aura that has encompassed you both. It made time feel slow.
âHow do you know?â You ask a bit stupidly. You hardly had missed your monthly bleeding, only being a few days off, which was very normal for you.
âI can hear it. The heartbeat.â His voice is low, guarded. There is a thick moment of silence.
âSurely not,â You almost laugh. But Astarionâs face is still, eyes round and wide as he studies you. He looks devastated, and it makes your stomach drop.
You realize heâs being serious, asking you in earnest if you had been with another. You think you should say something.Â
âYouâve been my only lover since the clearing, Astarion.â You want to reach out to him, but you think not. If Astarion had hackles, they would surely be raised.Â
âSo youâre going to chalk this up to some immaculate conception?â Astarion spats cruelly, his agitation getting the better of him as he flails his hands. âInstead of just telling me the truth?âÂ
Youâre speechless again. You knew he wouldnât lie about this, so you desperately try to accept the fact that youâre pregnant with Astarionâs child as he, the very man who has bred you, yells at you.
âClose your mouth, darling, you arenât a fly trap.â Astarion quips, crossing his arms.Â
The anger is rising inside you, his offense reaching a boiling point. Your fists clench, your eyes narrowing as you try to reason with him.
âFour weeks ago, we were in the Rashemen wilderness with only Minsc and Boo as our company,â Is all you can say.Â
Astarionâs expression is locked in between confusion and betrayal. âMinsc has his charms.âÂ
You scoff. âYou canât be serious, Astarion.â Astarionâs gaze meets the floor.Â
As you study your lover, your anger dissipates. You see how hurt he is, how unsure of himself he feels. He wasnât likely to tell you that outright, but you knew.
You canât place how you feel, anymore. You arenât numb, per say, but there is a distinct lack of feeling within you. You hadnât thought this a possibility. You didnât know if you were happy or sad, or if you would even be up to the challenge.
You needed some time to think, to let this soak in.Â
âYou know, I just remembered that Shadowheart invited me over for tea the other day,â Your excuse is lame, but Astarion doesnât stop you as you awkwardly walk down the steps, off to the crowded streets of the city.Â
***
Astarion was a mess the whole time you were gone. He tried to keep himself busy by doing various things around Jaheiraâs house, but he kept finding himself lost in thought, thinking about that little bundle of life inside of you.
He felt greatly relieved when you returned.
He waited for you in one of the spare bedrooms, the one you always shared when you two passed through Baldur's Gate.Â
He was pretending to read when you came in, trying not to seem too eager to talk with you. He heard the continued thump of the little heart beat alongside your own. His anxiety is paramount, but he feels a wave of relief crash over him at the sound of the life inside of you.
Astarion tried to accept that you hadnât slept with anyone else: you couldnât have, it was literally impossible. And he knew you never would have, anyways. But, since you didnât sleep with another man, that meant that he, Astarion Ancunin, impregnated you.Â
âHow was your date with Shadowheart?â Astarion asks, peeking over his book. You had begun to undress yourself, and Astarion couldnât help but steal a glance.Â
He noticed the sway of your breasts as you freed them; the tips of them being especially tight and a darker pink than usual.Â
Gods. It was like you were purposefully wafting your scent right in his face. You were sweeter than usual, and Astarion felt a bit ashamed at his growing stiffness.Â
Earlier, he had accused you of sleeping with another man, even though he very well knew you hadnât. And now, he was ogling you, thinking about all the pregnant women he had seen in his long life: it hadnât been very many. Pregnant women didnât often frequent the flophouses late at night.Â
But he imagined how your belly would swell, how your hips would round, and how your breasts would become even largerâŚthe thought aroused Astarion, far more than he expected it to. He had to stop himself when he imagined your milk-filled breasts; another bodily fluid of yours that your vampire was desperate to taste.
âIt was alright,â Your voice was shaky as you finally covered your breasts, to Astarionâs relief. He tried to ignore his swollen cock. âShe confirmed. What you said.âÂ
Astarion places his book down, moving to sit at the edge of the bed, placing himself closer to you. He really doesnât know what to do, or how he feels, but Astarion does know one thing: that he adores you, and he canât handle the distance between the two of you.Â
So, the vampire reaches out, desperate for your contact. Astarion feels much better when you take his hand, sitting next to him.
âIâm sorry for my accusation earlier. Iâm just having a hard time wrapping my head around it all.â His tone is good humored, down to earth, as he wants to be sweet to you. You deserved it.
âItâs rare. Practically a miracle.â You say, but your face is absent of the smile that Astarion had expected from you.
Astarion didnât really know how you felt about children. He assumed you didnât want them because you chose to be with him, but he expected you to be a little bit happier than you looked.Â
âThere are remedies, you know. If we donât want this.â You say, looking away from him as you do.Â
âWellâŚitâs your body, Tav.â Astarion spoke gently, wanting to be careful with you, because you were always so careful with him. âI canât tell you what to do with it.âÂ
Astarion imagined that if taking care of seven thousand vampire spawn in the Underdark was something the two of you had managed, then a child couldnât be too difficult. (Many years from now would prove Astarion very wrong in thinking this).
âWhat If I keep it? Would you leave me?â You speak quietly, carefully, as if you were treading dangerous waters; asking questions you didnât actually want to know the answer to.
Astarion doesnât hesitate, desperately wanting to comfort you. âNo,â Astarion squeezed your hand, grabbing the other as you faced each other. âI honestly canât imagine a scenario where I would.âÂ
You smile a bit, and Astarion smiles back. âSo, what do we do?â You ask tentatively.Â
Astarion sighs, a hand going to caress your cheek, bringing you closer as he pulls you into a tender kiss. âWe keep living, of course.â
imagine you live in a really small farm town, with absolutely nothing to do, the only thing to do in such a small town is to drink and fuck
so thatâs exactly what you all do, one of your friends has a giant farm, with a barn thatâs pretty empty with nothing but hay
itâs saturday night and youâre halfway to wasted on some homemade moonshine
the girls at the barn all wear some variation of jean shorts so short that their booty cheeks hang out, cropped flannel shirts tied in a way where their tits are also exposed, and cowboy boots
youâve opted to ditch your normal cowboy hat for some braided pigtails instead
âi think itâs time to play some musical chairsâ someone slurs behind you
the barn erupts in a roar of cheers, everyone hooting and hollering
you chug the rest of your moonshine, ready to fuck your neighbors and friends
everyone around you starts to get ready, some of the girls start pinching their nipples and pulling their tits out more, some opting to ditch their shirts all together, you see one girlâs hands sneak inside her shorts
you hike your shorts up a bit more so your ass hangs out more, you also choose to undo the button at the top, flashing the skin just above your leaky hole
you also untie your top, the scraps of your shirts hanging down to just cover your nipples, the rest of your body is on full and clear display
while you and the other sluts get ready, the guys have taken their seats around the circle, all of them stroking themselves to get their cocks nice and long and erect
someone starts the music and the girls begin to circle the men, the round officially started
the first round is always blow jobs, the first guy to breed a bitches throat is out, but that pair can fuck however the man wants while the rest of the game plays out
the music stops and you rush forward to the man in front of you
you drop to your knees, not even bothering to look at who youâre about to give head to
the dick in front of you is luckily not the biggest in the group or the smallest
the small ones tend to finish fast and the big one wouldâve been too much to start off with
you lick a long stripe up the underside of the cock in front of you, you look up and make eye contact while you swirl your tongue around the tip
itâs your sisterâs boyfriend, he groans and puts his hands on the back of your head
he lets you stay in control for now, both of you not wanting to be out on the first round, but the pressure at the back of your head reminds you who really is in control
you pop his tip into your mouth before quickly removing your mouth, you spit on his cock before using both hands to spread your spit up and down his full length
you make eye contact again as you take him into your mouth once more
âhands upâ he commands, a little confused you raise both hands above your heads, he uses one hand to hold both of your wrists together, his other keeping a firm hold on your head
âjust your mouth, slutâ
you continue to suck him off, relaxing your throat so you can get his whole length into your mouth, you keep reminding yourself to breathe through your nose
you start to gag a little as he fucks your pretty face, tears and saliva starting to overflow, before he really starts to treat you like the whore you are, you hear a loud moan to your right and the round is over
the cock from your mouth is removed, but before you can get off your knees, he squeezes your mouth open and spits into it and forces you to swallow
âgood girlâ
some girls start to remove their bottoms, you included, the next few rounds are all in the pussy, or the ass if the man decides to switch it up
round after round you play, managing to just barely stay in the game, riding dick isnât your favorite but youâve cum twice already
some men play with your clit, some grope and abuse your tits, some finger your butt while pounding into you
the more you play, the more you fuck, the hornier you get
you make it to the final round, your personal favorite
instead of the cunts circling the men, the two fuckdolls left in the game get on all fours and get blindfolded
the men circle the girls and when the music stops the first girl to squirt wins the game
by this point youâre naked, your girl cum and girl juice leaking out of you and dripping down your thighs
you get blindfolded and assume position, a bitch ready for her mounting, the music starts and you wiggle your butt in excitement
the music stops and before you have time to process anything you feel fingers in your breeding hole
youâre confused as to why you werenât immediately stuffed with cock, you moan none the less as you get a rough finger fucking
thereâs three fingers in you moving at a brutal place, a second hand snakes around your front, rubbing your clit expertly
your tongue is hanging out and youâre a drooling, moaning mess
a fourth finger is roughly added and you scream in pleasure and pain, still overstimulated from the prior rounds, you rapidly approach climax
just before youâre able to finish the fingers are ripped out from you and the delicious pressure on your clit is taken away
you scream in frustration, your orgasm ruined
before you can even start begging to be filled you feel the biggest dick youâve ever felt in your life poking at your fuckhole
you almost cum from that alone
hands are gripping into your hips so hard theyâll leave bruises, it takes some effort and it feels like the dick being stuffed inside of you is never ending
eventually whoever is behind you bottoms out
giving you no time to adjust, they pull out all the way before slamming back in, youâre roughly fucked and split open on the monster cock behind you
you canât do anything except simply take the fucking youâve been given like a good bimbo slut, you feel like youâre going to be split in half, your insides are on fire, but you donât want it to stop
one hand leaves your hips and finds purchase around your throat, the pressure of being lightly choked bringing you pure ecstasy
his other hand pinches, gropes, and slaps all over your used body
youâre readjusted and the new angle allows for the man behind you to fuck you deeper and right in a spot you didnât even know exsisted inside of you
his roaming hand ends up on your clit again, rubbing hard and fast, a little more pressure is added to your throat, a bite on your neck sends you over the edge and you cum harder than youâve ever cum before
as youâre forced to ride out one of the best orgasms of your life, you feel hot, thick ropes of cum fill your walls
you momentarily black out from the insanely erotic feeling, when you come to youâre still being pumped in and out of
youâre declared the winner of the night, along with the man who still has not stopped breeding your fuck hole
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Suits. Men wearing suits. Women wearing suits. Anyone wearing suits. It's just very attractive when people can actually pull it off. Instant level up. I'm sorry, I don't make the rules.
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Free to watch ⢠No registration required ⢠HD streaming
When he goes feral about me releasing deep into his womb, my hand sprawled out on his lower stomach.
What do you think ... how many puppies will Daddy fit in there, slut? My good boy wants that so much, hm? I know my baby dog can't talk right now, too dumb to think ~ Only made to be pretty and carry Daddy's pup's âĄ