livin' the dream

remember when you were 10 and you would hang out with your friends in order to Look At The Computer together like you went to their house and experienced the information superhighway together. and then leave

How fucking old are you people?

normal amount

They weren't happy noises.

They were polite and reasonable noises! The sound of protocol being followed! Negotiation and compromise!

The box would scream

It sounds like screaming, but actually it's a mating call.

so i was supposed to fuck the modem then

music is dying because every song has to be about the songwriter now. songwriters used to write about a book they read or a person they saw or a piece of history they know. you think you're interesting enough for all them songs?

they are going to execute me in the town square for taking 19 days to respond to an important email

“don’t take it personally” how would you like me to take it then? professionally? romantically? academically?

it's kind of crazy climate change has occurred at such a remarkable pace that I and everyone else around my age can remember a completely different climate in our childhoods. I truly watched winter gradually disappear in my life.

"You're too young to remember this, but there used to be so many insects outside that you would have to clean them off the windshield after a long car ride" is the kind of sentence that would have been in a cheesy scifi short story earlier in my life, perhaps submitted to a literary magazine and accepted to show support for its environmentalist message - now it's something I've said in earnest.

I should lock the fuck in *half an hour passes* I should lock the fuck in *half an hour passes* I should lock the fuck in *half an hour passes* I should-

I sense that somewhere a machine is being built to hurt me

they should invent a medicine that makes the aching jagged wound in your soul close