So, I have seen this question asked in bad faith, so all I can do is insist that I am asking it in good faith because I do not understand.
How is it possible for trans men or nonbinary people who specifically do not identify as women to identify as lesbians? The concept seems bioessentialist and transphobic.
For example, it seems a matter of common sense to me that cis men cannot be lesbians, but the way I've seen transmasc lesbians describe it is about loving women "in a queer way", which seems to imply that gender has no bearing on the label, which to my mind leaves the door open for cis men to use the label as a new kind of "nice guy" status, the idea of which, at least to me, is very off-putting.
And if cis men are specifically excluded on the basis of their sex, it seems to suggest that it is impossible for a trans man to actually transition, that how he was assigned at birth is some kind of cloud following him that can never truly be altered, that we are just humoring him by using he/him pronouns when we ask know he's still "really" a woman, since being attracted to women means he's actually still a lesbian rather than a straight man. This is, as I said previously, extremely transphobic to me.
As I said, I am asking this question in good faith. I do not understand how the idea of lesbians who are not women isn't transphobic and/or open to co-opting by cis men, who I do NOT want feeling safe in lesbian spaces.
ok i know this was in good faith but i am going to pivot to talking about a fatal flaw in your viewpoint:
transmasc is not the same as trans man
its an all squares are rectangles but not all rectangles are squares sort of thing. there are many transmascs who are not trans men. i am not a man. period. so there are a lot of transmasc lesbians because there are nonbinary lesbians (i am an agender lesbian myself). realizing this is the first step towards sorting this out in your head.
as for the rest of it, i'm not going top dive into the weeds of trans men calling themselves lesbians and such, i don't really care, frankly, and i'm not a trans man so i don't really have the perspective to speak to why they feel it's the thing to do. i think we can just tell cis men to fuck off because they don't get to rules loophole their way into calling themselves lesbians
on top of that, is there even a category of men trying to do that? i've seen men say "uhuhu i'm a lesbian too bc i love women hahaha" as a homophobic joke, but i've never come across a cis man who was trying to call himself a lesbian earnestly and honestly, and if i did to be honest i would just start hearing egg cracking sounds. cis men don't actually WANT to be lesbians, they want to butt in and be annoying and harass people. and blaming trans men for the way that cis men act is annoying and unhelpful
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