Gnostic Gnoob

Here is what I wish I learned about love a long time ago:

Notice when a beloved person is near and your heart lights up--all the ingredients for that good feeling happen inside you.

You are locked in a meat suit, and the signals you get from the world are interpretations of vibrating membranes. You don't actually get to "touch" anyone or anything really since at an atomic level the world is made of fields that repel one another. You take in the image of the "other" person "outside" of you, and you begin the chemical process of putting your animal to work in harmony. The vision and appearance of their face happens inside your head, the sound and memory of their voice happens inside your head, the feel of their skin happens inside your head. The idea AND the reality of them happens inside your head. And somehow THEY allow you to unlock copacetic feelings of preciousness, sacredness, wholeness? Please see when someone else seems to lift your spirits higher than they have ever been, they have really acted as a catalyst for you to let your own spirit rise by your own power. "This person makes me feel amazing" actually translates to "I let myself feel amazing."

Notice when the warmth of a beloved person makes you feel sufficiently safe, seen, and held. Please see that you give yourself permission to feel safe, seen, and held, on some level, as an internal response to your reckoning of the external phenomenon of their appearance and its affect on you. We show each other the ingredients we already had to work with all along to brew up something beautiful. Now consider: once that person becomes inevitably absent in your life, none of the ingredients to safety and fulfillment have actually been taken away. It is a trick to suppose another individual may be the key to unlocking equanimity. If you find that your beloved is some form of "sanctuary" from the rest of the world, you must realize that safety and sanctity is central to you, inside of you, has nothing to do with them, never had anything to do with them, and is something you give yourself permission to touch. Easier said than done, but a gate I offer nonetheless. Seeing is always recognition. Loving is allowing. I am complete.

If you look at someone and see something that would kill you if taken away, then this is a puzzle for you to solve to unlock your own self-worth. "She's so high above me" is a clunky vibration you got to have an ear for and know about to pull into the shop for an inspection when detected. "My beloved is gone, therefore I am diminished" IS A DANGEROUS MIRAGE. DO NOT WALK TOWARD IT.

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