LOVE LIKE WINTER

Her heart beat was steady, as much as he could tell for someone he'd never met before and of a species ( he assumed ) differing from Natralians, if her height and ears were anything to go by. Something else about her was taunting the edge of his senses, something he couldn't quite place a finger on just yet. Traversing worlds was no mean feat, even for a starborn, he could allow his addled senses to catch up to him ---- if his quarry afforded him the time. ❝  That's a shame, I'm quite pleasant company, ❞ he finally responded, and despite the mild jest of his tone he raised his hands peacefully. ❝  I'm hunting.  ❞

❅ ⸻ As much as her instincts were telling her to tread carefully and prepare for a fight all the same, the weariness in her bones was begging her to hold off from such activities, if only because her body wasn't entirely sure it had enough in the reserves to go toe-to-toe with a man she'd never met before, and as such had no idea how well versed he was in combat. Not to mention the fact that she could already picture the look of worry mixed with abject terror on Clive's face should he find her wounded and alone.

He'd raised his hands, a sign of peace and despite his jest he had at least afforded her the courtesy of informing her what he was doing in this place. Hunting? It wasn't exactly out of the realm of possibility. After all, people of all ilk came into the ruins to find pieces of old technology to study, and some even came for the thrill of battle and the bragging rights that they'd bested one of the mechanical beasts that guarded them.

But it was his description that called her to action, for of course she knew of a creature fitting that description —And some might even think him monstrous. ❝ And why is it that you're hunting this beast, as you called it? What lead you to believe it was down here? ❞

"This is not part of the deal I am offering you." Defiance was also a display of human will, and she needed to learn that it would only bring her pain. Something close to a low tsk escaped the Dominant of Darkness as one of the akashic lowered a blade, placing it against the throat of the young woman. She was forced to freeze almost immediately, least she risk cutting into her own throat; the blade was pressed firmly up against her, already drawing forth a trickle of blood.

"Are you afraid to voice the truth? That you would sacrifice an innocent girl to die in place of your beloved Phoenix? Before she died, she deserves to hear at least that truth." There was never a chance that she would be the one to walk away from this encounter. Life was cruel and unfair, and it was only those special few that were loved and cherished who would have any chance of surviving, let alone thriving.

❅ ⸻ No matter the choice she made she would have blood on her hands, more blood to add to the already stained flesh of her palms that will never be washed clean. Had Joshua been here, really been here, he would tell her to save the woman because it was the right thing to do, that in all of this the woman was truly innocent. They had poked the bear and he had bared his fangs to them, so why should the woman suffer for their trespasses?

However, she had to take into account how Clive would feel once he learned the truth of it all. That she had saved a stranger and forsaken his brother. He wouldn't recover from it, would never look at her the same even if he knew full well that had he been in Joshua's place, he would have begged her to make the same choice, to save the innocent.

❝ You think these bonds would be so easily broken? That if I choose Joshua, he would curse my name with his dying breath? You don't know us, don't know the depths of our connection. It is rooted deep, Barnabas. ❞

Her eyes shifted to the girl, her eyes still wild and darting every which way as though looking for escape, or perhaps even someone to save her. How cruel it is that she be here in this moment, that fate had decided to pluck her from her everyday life and place her on the board between gods.

There would be one for Jill and Clive. Joshua was determined to make that happen, no matter the cost. His own life was already forfeit, even if it was a truth that he was keeping firmly to himself. That didn't mean his brother had to suffer through the same dreary end as himself.

Even though the truth is that we both will die and will have nothing to show for it. We will fight and suffer and we will fail and everyone we ever loved will suffer because of it.

The thought slammed into him, practically tearing the breath from his lungs, and Joshua had to keep himself still for a moment as he had to sort through whether the thought was his own, or from Ultima. Because -- because as much as he didn't want to admit it, there was truth in the harsh words being whispered in his mind. This battle was not one likely to be won.

"There's nothing..." His voice trailed off, knowing already that there was little point in lying; anyone would be able to see through it in a moment. "... I am... tired. I've been neglecting my own rest. I should retire before Jote or Tarja hears of this; I'll never be allowed outside of the infirmary if they do."

❅ ⸻ For all the years they had spent apart, for all the growing they had done to become the people they were today, Jill could still tell when Joshua was keeping something from her, from everyone around him. It reminded her of when they had been children, how he would cough and sniffle his way through the day and reassure everyone around them that it was nothing more than a cold. She wished she could tell her younger self that it had been more than that, that his Eikon took a toll upon him and that she needed to offer him more support.

Yet she had known none of this. Had taken him at his word.

While it was true he hadn't been resting nearly as much as he was supposed to, Jill could sense there was a hint of a lie buried somewhere in that bed of truth. There was more to this than met the eye and it was this very gut feeling which had her reaching out to him, taking a firm hold of his hand to prevent him from walking away from her.

❝ Joshua... please. You think all these years has made me forget your tells? If there is more to it than you needing to rest, then please, don't shut me out? I want to help, I want to support you. I'm not a child, I can take whatever it is you're hiding from me. ❞

Spotting her wasn't difficult. Most of the women seemed to give her a wide berth, and there was a part of Joshua that was certain he would have been able to recognize her anywhere. She was older, her hair longer and beginning to turn lighter, almost as if the frost of Shiva had touched her. Likely it had.

A quick furtive glance was spared before he hurried over to her. If she was bound, he would deal with figuring out how to free her, though if it would not impede her movement it would have to wait until they had gotten free of this stronghold. The less time spent here, the better.

❅ ⸻ Not a single eye was batted nor a head turned when the door to chambers she and the women and children resided in creaked open, announcing the arrival of someone that didn't belong there. All the whining of the door hinges afforded whoever it was that had crossed the threshold was the women curling in tighter upon themselves, holding the children closer as though somehow it would make them appear invisible.

Jill did neither of these things. If they came for her, it was because she was to fight, or be punished for not meeting their demands.

Her head hung low, lips pressed into a thin line as she all but burned a hole into the wall she had been staring at, though when she heard her name called it gave her pause. No man had said her name in as long as she could remember, she was either referred to as an abomination, unclean, a demon that had to be cleansed. Her name? Jill was uncertain any of the men actually knew it, and it was for this reason alone she looked to the person who had all but whispered it.

Recognition crossed her dirty and weary features, brows furrowing just as touch as her eyes darted back over his face. He was older, had lost that cherubic face of his, but the eyes, the kindness in them, those had not been lost. ❝ J-Joshua? ❞ And for a moment she was happy, for a moment she felt joy and hope in her heart that she might be freed of this torment she lived daily.

Her shifting movements drew his eyes to the way she was holding her arms, and for the first time Barnabas became aware of the fact that she was bound. It was odd; he blinked, feeling confused as to why that would be the case. One hand moved to touch as his pocket, and a key was there. The only logical conclusion would be that he had bound her, but he had no memory.

He wasn't entirely certain he knew where they were, either. It had been as if his mind had been acting on auto-pilot until he had woken up moments ago, unaware of everything he had done prior.

Without knowing just how powerful she was, freeing her would be a mistake - and yet Barnabas still crouched by her, unlocking her bonds with a flat press of his lips.

"How would I? And the Mother Crystals..." In truth, he was never certain how he felt about them. Were they a blessing? They provided man with aether, but in turn made man lazy. Was the trade off truly worth it?

"If they are as dangerous as you say, then why is it that they provide aether for man?"

❅ ⸻ The truth of the matter was that even she wasn't certain which of the two scenarios rang correct for her. It could very well be that she believed him, or that she recognised that he believed what he was saying, but when she got down to the heart of it? She was tired and every muscle and bone in her body ached; simply going along and taking whatever bait he was laying down for her could end up being a fools errand, but she could also learn so much more as a result.

Right now, it was a risk she was willing to take if it meant getting these blasted fetters off of her faster.

❝ That I'm not certain I know the answer to. I have my own ideas, have pieces of information... but I'm not sure how they fit, or if putting them together would make any sense. ❞

It was frustrating to say the least, to feel as though she were being played, made to look like a fool as she all but danced for Ultima like she were some puppet he pulled the strings for. But at least Barnabas had seen fit to release her from her bonds, the relief near instant even if the effects of the fetters would take a little time to over come. They always left her feeling as though she could sleep for several days if only to ride out the remnants of nausea in peace.

Still, her hands rubbed at her wrists and the look on her face said it all, that she was both grateful and confused by this apparent act of kindness. Was it a test? Was he waiting to see if she would prime and fight her way out of here? Did he truly not recall how he had bested her so easily in Kanver?