Thayná

But I won’t tell them.

I don’t want to tell them.

I want them to watch as I bring in baking for the class potluck, not eating anything myself, and they’ll start to take notice.

I want them to listen as I walk beside them in the halls, just floating across the floors as my footsteps fade lighter, and they’ll wonder how much I weigh.

I want them to be concerned as I sip away at a black coffee at a restaurant, making pleasant conversation while everyone else eats a meal.

I want them to watch as I hide in baggy sweaters that grow baggier and skinny jeans that grow loose and they’ll finally start to worry.

Calories

Burning calories

Exercise

Gaining weight

What should I eat

What shouldn’t I eat

How thin I look

How fat I look

My weight

Should I skip that snack

How I wish I could lose weight

How I hate my body

How other people would react if they knew what I was thinking