Catastrophic.

yesterday my uber driver told me he stopped wearing glasses and just decided his eyes were better and I was like man as the passenger in this elantra I would like you to keep more secrets from me

yeah okay, ill reblog that

Being an ace attorney fan and working in criminal defence makes this meme so much funnier

listen this isn’t rat related but I’m going off the walls right now this is literally so fucking funny

Two days ago my husband said "...and he was pissed" and I said "don't say that around the kids!" so he corrected himself to "and he was liquid angry" and I've been laughing since

what the fuck is this real

reanimate my will to live

Wake me up inside

my friend who is training to be a 911 operator just told me that they are having to restrain themself whenever responding to training calls from saying “that’s illegal people can’t do that” and I find that so fucking funny