Incautum

I haven’t been feeling well... I wish I could say things are getting better, it will get better... someday. for now all I can think about is giving up on life (again, though I haven’t act upon it) I don’t know how long can I tolerate the pain. I just want everything to end. I’ve too many things on my broken plate. I tried... I always end up shedding a tear or two, breaking down in silence. The thought of being gone doesn’t scare me anymore. I’m happy to leave and say goodbye.

One thing remains, I’m still a night owl! And I guess I can say I survive? and still am surviving. I don’t know why I’m back on this site but I do know why I left. This time I don’t mean to go away. I’ll keep my old post (to remind me of who I was) but I’ll channel to a more vibrant positive outlook from now on. I’m determined to pursue my dreams, work on my personality, and make ends exceed the meeting point. Nonetheless, I can’t promise to change my body clock. Remind me that I need to get myself checked out. 

There's a reason why I'm avoiding this site, there's a reason why I tried to fight every itch to scroll down, a reason why... I'm afraid to linger on these thoughts and feelings writing it all out, I'm afraid I'll be in this dark cloud again, I'm afraid I'll miss you so much. It's been just two weeks I said I don't want to count the days I've been away, missing those routines of each day.