You Can Find Me Where The Sea Pours Into The Stars

She was always smiling. Bright, sunny, a literal ray of sunshine captured and made into a human being. His lord captain, bold as she was in combat, was just a kind person. He wasn't sure how or why she had decided to keep him in her retinue sometimes, though he was fairly sure it was because he hadn't asked to leave. She would ensure he got back to his chapter if it killed her. That was why he was so frustrated now. Caught between his desire to serve the God emperor, and by extension, the Imperium of man, and the extremely uncharacteristic desire to strip her raw and rut into her like some lesser animal in heat.

He'd never, could never. He was an Astartes, and urges like that surely made him aberrant. But he prayed, he confessed his sins. Each time he rubbed himself raw in his quarters in the night, fiending off of her kindness and generosity, off of the little moments throughout the day. He'd feel guilt, of course, after he'd spilled into his own palm, and he flogged himself to atone for that. But it was moments like now that he watched her commanding her retinue that he really struggled with those urges most.

The serious look in her eyes, unwavering as she took the time to look at each of her subordinates with a stare that showed how serious she was. The slight lean over the table showing how fully engaged she was. The slip of neck beneath her garments, the curve of her shape, so familiar and yet so newly important to him. He could see himself bending her over this very table mid-speech as she spoke of the damnable nobles causing trouble on her agri-world and pounding her until she was absolutely dripping with his seed-

"Isn't that right, Tankred?" She asked, her eyes turning to him, and he paused. For once, he hadn't actually been listening or paying attention to her. He blinked, and grunted, his usual response. She huffed slightly, not angrily but amused as she shot him a soft smile. "You weren't paying attention to a word I just said, were you?" She asked, and his brows furrowed. "It's alright, I know you want to get this over with as soon as possible. We're almost done, and you won't have to do much with the nobles if you'd rather sit this one back. Not much hitting things going to be happening here I imagine."

Heat was pooling in the pit of the belly. So considerate of his dislike of formal events... So considerate in general. But he knew that it was better for him to be there than not.

"I will manage." He replied gruffly, watching her intently. The smile she gave him was warm and appreciative. "If you were to fall under attack by one of the more opportunistic degenerates, it would be... Unfortunate."

"Thank you, Tankred. I'll make sure that this goes quickly regardless, of course. I want to deal with them just as much as you do." She said, turning back to the other occupants to keep discussing. He could just storm in there and start shooting, of course. No survivors, the crimes they were accused of were severe enough, though she wanted to do a trial. Give them a chance to redeem themselves that he knew would just be wasted. She saw the good in people, even if the good wasn't really there in the first place.

Maybe it was a flaw, maybe he was just too cynical. He didn't know anymore. Couldn't tell, and didn't want to tell either. He was happy to just watch her host her meeting and discuss strategy. The xenos she kept as a member of her retinue did cut in every once in a while, but he couldn't care less about them prattling on about politicking with the rest of the Eldar and how things were done. It was just noise. With the meeting adjourned, she stepped away to the library for some light reading, as she normally did around this time. She always took her lunch there when she was able, a simple meal of cheeses, meats, crackers, occasionally she had pickles and olives as well, and other times she also had fruits. She'd share with the serfs and workers, insist that they take her leftovers home to eat. Today though, today he was finally going to confront her about whatever it was she was doing to him.

He found her exactly where he thought she'd be, curled up on the massive plush sunken conversation pit, which really was just a slightly sunken cushion covered in blankets and throw pillows. Decadent, but she hadn't been the one to have it installed. She sat closest to the fireplace, snacking delightfully on her food and reading a book he knew she'd been slowly working through for the past few days. She was only half-way. He wasn't sure why or how it was taking so long to complete, but he was hardly complaing now.

"You've done something." He said, and she paused, looking up at him. All wide-eyed and innocent as if she didn't know that she was awful and wicked and corrupt. "You've done something to me. Must have. You're a heretic, consorting with xenos and other heretics in your retinue. What is it that you've done?" He asked, confrontational, and her brows furrowed in concern the way he'd seen them do what had to have been hundreds of times by now. Like when he was wounded in battle, or restless from too much time spent in the warp. The slight pinch, the wrinkle that formed, delicate and fair.

"Tankred, I don't know what you mean, I haven't done anything to you. What makes you think I've done something?" She asked, setting aside her plate and drink, sitting up a bit straighter as she marked her place in her book.

"You must have. Some curse or other enchantment. Don't play dumb with me, I have seen this before. What are you really? Some Slaaneshi shape-changer trying to seduce me to the dark gods? A witch?" He asked, looming over her, and she blinked up at him. Doe-eyed and surprised. Throne, she looked so innocent down there, so harmless, but she had to have done something. "There is no other possible explanation for what you do to me. Every waking moment, the image of you is stuck behind my eyelids when I blink, burned into my retinas. I search for you without even meaning to, and when I find you my blood burns in my veins. So yes, you have done something to me, and I demand you tell me what so I may put an end to it." He hissed out, angry.

But she did not react the way he'd expected. No wicked cackling, no triumphant, sadistic grin. Just a flustered look, a parting of lips, maybe a slight darkening of her cheeks and such a pleasant sweet smell that he was sure had to be the cause of this madness.

"Ah... I um... I..." She stammered, struggling to find her words. He growled, dangerous as he took a step towards her, the cushions sinking beneath his foot under his weight as he swiftly boxed her in. She did not recoil in terror or lunge to meet him, just hid her face in her hands, muttering something indistinguishable.

"What is it woman?! Spit it out!" He snapped, snatching her wrists- so much thinner and more dainty than his. The bones would take nothing at all to break, he could just squeeze and turn them to powder, he was sure of it. She was so soft and delicate and breakable in ways that he was not.

"I really haven't done anything to you! I didn't think Astartes felt... Well, desire." She said, flustered, and he paused. No, Astartes did not feel desire. It was not within their programming. Maybe Firstborns, but he was no Firstborn, he was Primaris. Always had been, and Primaris had far stricter conditioning than their older brothers. Desire was... Aberrant. He wasn't aberrant, he couldn't be! He'd done nothing to become that way other than that one time when he'd met her that he'd been in the warp for far too long- The damnable t'au- She cleared her throat.

"I um... I'd be happy to discuss it with you, if you'd like? I certainly didn't believe I was doing anything. I mean, I won't lie, I do harbor some... Fondness for you, though I never had any expectation that it would be reciprocated." She offered, and he paused, staring down at her. Flustered, all but able to feel the heat coming from her face, the tiny line of her body beneath his as he pinned her. She... This same madness was reciprocated? That particular realization pelted him across the jaw with the same force as a dreadnaught.

"You... Are also afflicted?" He asked, and she laughed, trying to reach for his face. His hands were like shackles around her wrists for a moment, before he slowly loosened his grip. Her hands were tiny as they cupped his face, gently bringing his head down towards hers so she could press a kiss to his forehead.

"Poor thing, this life has taken so much from you... It's not an affliction, it is just natural. We're both in our prime and have spent exhaustive hours in each-others company. I'm quite fond of you, Tankred. If you were feeling things for me then I would not be opposed to indulging. Sometimes, sating those cravings is enough to either move on or might become something far more... Pleasant." She said, and his nose wrinkled. She did not like to be alone with men in this way, he knew that all too well. She rarely took company to her quarters. While he was admittedly a bit daft about what exactly went down in there, he was not entirely stupid. He knew the premise. The gist. That had always been more than enough, and he didn't like to think about it.

"Indulge?" He asked, affronted. She hummed, nodding. "You would not want to indulge this... This vile obsession! This needs to be burned out with pain! With retribution, the whip is the only thing-" She shushed him softly.

"No, no it doesn't. You are still a man, Tankred. You are still human. Needs are natural-" She began softly, and he scoffed.

"Not to an Astartes!" He snapped, leaning his weight into her. She didn't offer resistance, gasping quietly. He groaned, low in his chest as he gave into the animal urge to just bury his face into her throat and inhale greedily. She smelled sweet, like her perfume and skin and something sweet and warm, like freshly baked sugary bread. It made him salivate. He groaned, hips twitching, and her fingers gently brushed his hands.

"Tankred, if you need something from me then take it." She breathed. He groaned again, tempted to bite down on her neck and rut. He couldn't, he wouldn't. His forehead rested against hers as they shared breaths for a moment their lips brushing. Her eyes slid closed softly after a moment, in acceptance or surrender he wasn't sure, but he would take it.

He hadn't ever kissed like this before, but she didn't need to know that, his lips pressed to hers and he groaned, shivering. She melted into it, humming softly as she kissed him back. They were pressed together, he could feel every inch of her beneath him, keenly aware of his own weight on top of her. He followed blindly after her example, his mind pleasantly blank. A protesting noise had him pulling back so she could gasp for air. He opened his mouth to apologize when she tried to tug her wrists free from where he'd pinned them above her head, and he released them. Immediately, she grabbed his face and kissed him again, her fingers carding through his hair as her lips moved against his.

His hands mostly free, he put his weight onto his forearm above her head, and let his spare roam, caressing down her side, feeling each dip and curve and swell, the softness of her body, squeezing the fat of her hip and cupping her breast to all but knead it. She did not seem to hate that, moaning into his moth as she arched up into the touch, her fingers tugging his hair slightly, her teeth closing lightly around his lip in a slight scrape. That sent a confusingly pleasant buzz through him. Her fingers slipped under the collar of his tunic and he couldn't repress his shiver.

"Shhhh you're alright." She breathed, kissing him sweetly as her fingers ghosted over his skin, and he shuddered again, groaning slightly at the sensation. It was... Painful, but at the same time sheer bliss. Her fingers ran up, nails gently dragging kver his skin and into his hair, scratching gently. He groaned and dove for her mouth again, clumsy and eager as he kissed her, squeezing her tit in his left hand. He was going to be damned for this, maybe, but he was sure he'd be damned regardless. She was his ruin.

Time blurred as he kissed and groped and fondled, caressing and feeling and testing until he realized that he was feeling bare skin against his, blinking as he pulled back slightly, panting though he was not wanting for air. She lay there, panting and disheveled, legs parted where he had slotted between them, her top torn open, leaving her chest bare and nipples peaked. He let out a low moan, and she huffed, picking at the remnants of her shirt, clearly not as upset as she was pretending to be.

"You must be lent up like nothing else..." She breathed, her voice carrying a slight rasp, a little huskier than normal. He was not complaining.

"You are a foul temptress, this is only the natural punishment for your seduction-" He began and she shushed him, grabbing the front of his tunic to pull their lips together again. He groaned, grabbing her thighs to yank them apart and slot between them again, and she moaned softly, clinging to him as he worked himself free from his clothing, peeling his tunic off as she groped and explored now, moaning into her mouth as she tugged his hair. A frantic scramble of fumbling and pulling at fabric was rewarded with him being shoved by the shoulders, gently as they rolled over so she could peel off the remaining pieces of clothing that she wore.

"Rotten little whore." He grumbled half-heartedly, and she shushed him, pressing a kiss to his lips.

"Hush up now, you know damn well if you really hated it you could leave." She replied, rolling her hips against his. Lightning sparked through him at the delicious friction against his painfully erect cock, which drooled precum against his stomach. For a moment he was struck dumb, his tongue too heavy in his mouth to be of use. Her hands drifted kver his body as her hips rocked, grinding her cunt along his shaft, leaving a trail of slick in her wake, her lips pressing sweet kisses against his face as she moved, a kiss to the corner of his lips, to his forehead, his cheeks, his throat. He felt stupid and useless, but it felt so blissfully good that he didn't want to budge for even a second in case it turned from pleasure to pain.

"Mmrn... Lord Captain..." He groaned, and she hummed, kissing him properly.

"You were fussing about nothing. You can have this, you are allowed." She whispered softly, and he groaned as he rolled the two of them over sk he could pin her down, grinding against her, hearing the slick noise of their bodies moving against each-other. He swore under his breath, shivering. He was going to be damned for this, rhe Emperor would not be pleased- She moaned, shivering as his cockhead caught against her.

"Tankred..." She breathed, and suddenly, damnation didn't seem as bad. He rumbled, leaning forward to bump his forehead against hers as he pressed. She hissed, whining. "You won't fit-!" She gasped, and ge groaned, fingers clumsily sliding down to slide over her xunt, finding her hole to press in, earning a mewl. The sound was like nothing he had ever heard before. Of course he had heard mortals humping away when they thought they would not be heard, but this was different. This was for him. He groaned, all but attacking her neck as his fingers rolled and stroked inside of her, trying to stretch her wide enough to take him.

The sounds she made were sin wrapped in velvet, soft moans, mewls, sighs and gasps, her hips twitching against his hand as he worked, feeling the heat of her cunt around his digits, the sickness of her arousal, the soft velvety walls he was literally aching to burry himself into. He panted against the side of her neck as he spread his fingers within her, her hips jerking upwards and shivering, and he took the chance to try again, pulling back to his haunches, grabbing her thighs to part them. His cock slapped against her belly, the size difference obscene. He almost felt bad. Almost. He slicked himself with her juices, slow, methodical, panting as he watched as he pressed forward. There was pressure, some resistance as his cockhead pressed, before there was warmth and tightness. He moaned, shivering as he froze in place. Her nails prickled against his wrists as she clawed at him.

"Tankred-!" She gasped again, and he rumbled, his hand coming down next to her head a bit harder than necessary as he slowly pushed forward, earning whines and whimpers and wriggles as she squirmed beneath him, panting as she took every inch little by little. He didn't think he could speak at the moment, focused on trying to wedge as much of himself as he could inside of her, pausing only when he felt his cockhead press square against her cervix, earning an interesting little warble. He stared down at her, chest heaving. She looked stunning. Debauched. A faint sheen of sweat on her skin, her hair messed, body bare. He leaned down and buried his face into the crook of her neck, huffing as he rocked his hips very shallowly, earning mewls and whines as her arms wrapped around his shoulders.

"Oh Tankred, Tankred please-!" Her mewls were so, so pleasing, he couldn't help but try a firmer thrust. He couldn't put all of his force behind it, but a but more than his gentlest could do, surely. It earned a cry, and he felt the thrill shiver up his spine. He groaned, hips sawing back and forth steadily, gradually increasing speed and force until he was pounding into her. She was crying out, almost screaming beneath him, clawing at his skin and the cushions beneath her. He gripped her hips hardz grabbing whatever he could to keep from knocking her away from him with his thrusts, her ankle, her thighs, hips, shoulders. Anything and everything. He felt dumb, moaning with every movement, her walls, sopping wet and warm, caressing his shaft in a silken grip that was so far above his own hand that he wasn't sure he could ever go back.

She shivered and warbled, thrashing slightly, shaking as she all but growled, wheezing as she writhed beneath him, her silken grip growing almost unbearably tight around him, and he couldn't help but moan, slowing his thrusts to throw more of his weight behind them, wheezing.

"Nn- Ssstop squeezing-!" He gasped, shivering, his thrusts faltering for a moment. She let out a wail, shivering against him before she went slack, her breaths hitching. He groaned, weakly humping against her as he tumbled over the edge, whining in almost painful overstimulation as he wrung every last drop of pleasure out of himself, slumping slightly against her. Her breaths were hitching, blasting against the side of his neck as she nosed against him, clinging.

He took a moment to catch his breath before he propped himself up a bit. She was a mess, and the guilt hit instantly. Tears tracked down her face and glistened in her eyes, fresh bruises already blooming from his grip, but she was smiling at him, cupping his face to kiss him again, humming softly into his mouth.

"Throne... That was something else... Not all that bad, now was it Tankred?" She asked, and he grunted softly, staring at her through half-lidded eyes for a moment.