Gender Benders

I exist lmao. 

School’s been kicking my butt.

So, body language is very important in passing. Traditionally, men and women have different styles of walking and presenting themselves. 

Men tend to walk with their hips pointing forward, chest up, as well as a wider walk. Hands in pockets or swinging gently by the side. 

Women tend to walk with more of a swing in their hips, a little bit more of runway style steps, hands swinging by side. 

A random tip that works for me is pointing my feet more inward when I want to seem female and pointing my feet slightly more outward when I want to seem male. 

An easy way to learn more is simply just studying the people around you and see what styles of walking click better. Then, try putting them into practice. 

Another thing that I use is simply listening to music that makes me want to strut around my room, then analyzing how that strut feels and whether it’s more masculine or feminine. 

My name is Kai (they/he/she) and I recently—I say recently really it was a year ago—realized I am genderfluid. 

I’ve scoured the internet for advice and tips and anything really, and I thought I’d compile the stuff I’ve learned and figured out here for other genderfluid or just generally gender bendy people to read. 

First off, you can call me Kai. It’s not technically my name but I do really like it. I was considering trying it out as my name but then my grandmother named her new dog Kai. So that’s not really on the table as my name anymore just for logistical reasons lmao, but I still like it and I don’t feel comfortable sharing my real name on the internet. 

For pronouns, I do use all pronouns but in general they/them with a sprinkling of he/she would be great lol. I haven’t really experimented with neopronouns or it/its but really anythings chill. 

For most of my posts I will talk about “male” vs “female” and “masculine” vs “feminine” in the sense of passing easier. Clothes and makeup and hair do not have a gender, but our society has given them genders, and sometimes it works to our advantage to use these stereotypes to pass better.

I personally feel better and more euphoric when I present my gender more traditionally or stereotypically but I know many people don’t feel like that, so take all of this advice with a grain of salt. It’s coming from my experiences and the advice that I have gathered and felt helpful, if it doesn’t resonate with you please don’t feel the need to listen to me lmao.

Anyway, thank you and hopefully some of this will be helpful to you!