sweet sincerity

Eleanor laughed at his assumptions, obviously a joke and shook her head at Connor. “Yes,” she sighed dramatically. “And tonight is the night I hope to confess my undying love for you, Connor Evans.” Her lips spread into a wide grin and she leaned onto the railings of the stairs, closing her eyes and bringing the back of her hand to her forehead for extra effect. She then straightened herself out and rolled her eyes playfully. “But really, it’s neither. The costumes were originally for Tyler and I, but apparently he already bought one without telling me.” She sighed, lips pursed slightly. She shouldn’t have been too surprised, they haven’t been talking much lately, Elle being gone during the day and Tyler getting home at incredibly late hours. She shook her head, “I planned on returning them before I get home, but hey, now they can actually be used instead.” Elle raised her eyebrows, her expression changing into an excited grin. “I’ll get them now, be right back-” hurriedly, she ran down the stairs, snatching her keys out of her purse that she had left by her coat. She made her way outside and to her car before opening up the passenger’s side and quickly grabbing the two plastic packages into her arms. Elle now slowed down her pace little, now jogging instead of running back into the house. Climbing the stairs at hasty speed, she was panting slightly when she found herself back in front of Connor, holding up the two costumes so he could see. “Hope you like Catwoman and Batman,” she grinned, her words a little breathless. “I hope it fits though, it’s a medium so..” Elle held up the costume next to him, trying to imagine what it had looked like when she took the costume out back at the store. Elle wasn’t going to lie, she had gotten a little excited about the fact of seeing Connor in a batman costume. She’ll have to remember to insist on asking him to do the voice later. “Alright, try it on and I’ll put mine on, what time is the party again?” She questioned, glancing back at him as she stopped under the doorway of the bathroom. 

When he finally stated his favour, Elle couldn’t help but be a little surprised and let her eyebrows rise slightly at his words. She thought it would have been something a little more..domestic? Like maybe he had needed some help with some chores, she didn’t expect for him to ask her to be his date at a Halloween party. Connor was already at the top of the stairs before he glanced back at her expectantly, only then she realized that she was supposed to be following him. “Oh- sorry!” Quickly, she moved up the stairs with a sheepish smile then stopping right before him. She noticed his voice tone down slightly, becoming more firm and less rushed as he clarified the fact that there was no double-meaning to his words, and immediately Elle nodded. “Of course, I understand. I wasn’t even thinking about that,” she laughed softly, and it was half true. Elle had still been sort of busy being amazed by the fact that Connor had asked her such a favour because firstly, she didn’t take him for one to attend a Halloween party, but it now made sense after his explanation. “But yes, I am available,” Elle nodded with a smile and her smile only grew after his second- or was it third? explanation as to why he had asked her. “Nice to see I was your last choice,” she teased him as she looked down at the ground, pretending to look disappointed. But when he began setting her up an opportunity to turn him down, Elle had to look up at him in amusement but also disbelief. “When you ask me things, why do you always assume I’m going to say no? And I’m twenty-eight, turning thirty in two years, might as well start early. You make me sound like I’m twenty-two or something,” she scoffed, shaking her head softly. “I’m coming,” Elle repeated firmly. “And count yourself lucky not only for that, but because since I’m assuming that costumes are going to be mandatory for this party and seeing as this is last-minute, I’m also going to go ahead and assume that you don’t have one. So I guess it’s kind of perfect that I have two costumes for the both of us right inside my car.” Elle secretly hoped that he wouldn’t question this and would simply go along with it, because just thinking about explaining to him why she had those costumes already brought a grimace from her face and made her cringe inwardly.

Eleanor was always a fan of Halloween, what’s not to love? Kids got to overload on candy and adults on alcohol, the holiday appealed to all ages. Except tonight she had to work, so she pursed her lips and shook her head at her friend who she was just speaking to on the phone. “I’m sorry, I just can’t make it tonight. Tyler will be there, though.” She ignored her friend’s exasperated sigh that came from the other line, “okay, love you too, drink responsibly!” Elle called out to her before hanging up. Exhausted from the conversation itself, she sighed tiredly and trudged slightly as she made her way up the house’s front steps then towards it’s front door. Fishing her keys out of her bag, she opened the lock and pushed the door open with her shoulder, shoving the keys back in her pocket. Without even barely taking a single step inside, she saw Connor rushing down the stairs and running up to her. He exclaimed her name, his voice holding an unusual excitement to it and Elle scrunched her eyebrows together in confusion and slight suspicion. He was polite too, taking her coat for her and setting it neatly down onto the couch, then in the rush of his talking, there it was, a favour. Elle didn’t know if she should laugh or let out a sigh of relief first. “Okay, first of all, ‘favourite nanny’, ‘services’, very suspicious sounding favour, how did you manage to make me sound like your personal escort in all in one breath?” She teased with a small grin, narrowing her eyes at him. “And second, god, I thought you were going to fire me or something,” the girl let out a scoff and shook her head, thought she still maintained the light manner to her tone. She stepped around the male, picking up her coat and hanging it up on the rack by their door, along with her scarf that she had just begun to unwrap around her neck. A smile on her lips, Elle turned to face Connor as she put her hands on her hips. “But alright, I’ll bite, what do you need?” It was strange, seeing this side of Connor, and he was grinning too, which was rare and she only saw whenever he was around Cassidy. But right now, this specific, almost desperate side of him, for some reason, it amused Elle.

As if Eleanor was somehow reading the rush of thoughts racing through his mind, she spoke with a gentleness and certainty in her voice that he couldn’t ignore. There was a load of awkwardness that came with her comforts, but Connor pretended not to take note of it. She was clearly trying hard to cheer him up, even if she didn’t know the complete background of his bitterness. “If you think so, it must be true.” He joked to lighten the mood, laughing under his breath. “Is there such a thing as being too good? Perhaps the nice guys finish last saying isn’t all that inaccurate.” Some people such as Eleanor who only knew his life and personality from an outside view could easily say that he was as good a man could get. Most would pride themselves on these compliments, but Connor hated hearing them. He was always the nice guy - the one who was willing to give up anything for someone who wouldn’t do the same. Women liked nice, sure. But nice got boring. Nice was spending Friday nights watching TV and maybe, just maybe having sex if they were lucky. He didn’t want to be nice, or selfless. He wanted to do whatever made him happy, that was what everyone seemed to be doing these days. In truth, Connor wasn’t entirely sure what made him happy. Cassidy made him happy, but that was a given. His life was a routine stuck on repeat for who knows how long. It was no wonder why Rachel wanted to go for the younger, adventurous neighbour across the street.

“I am getting awfully tired of using my hands for everything…” He said in response to her insistence, shifting over so that Eleanor could bring herself a little closer. Before he could register what was happening, her hand was rested on top of his. At the feeling of their contact, his hand flinched ever so slightly but hopefully subtle enough that she didn’t notice it. The size of her hand was significantly smaller than his, and he wanted to laugh at her determination to teach him. He couldn’t though, as he was practically frozen in place aside from the hand Eleanor was in control of. His eyes searched for hers, reluctantly meeting them with contact locked in place. Their gaze was broken as she continued to help him, his eyes drifting downwards to the food - he’d nearly forgotten that him learning to use chopsticks was the point of all this - and he successfully managed to pick up bokchoy with her guidance. When her voice dropped to a mere whisper, he could feel the mood of the room completely shift into something different. He broke apart as soon as she did, only just now realizing how close she’d gotten next to him. As Eleanor returned to her seat, Connor did the same but purposely avoided making eye contact, keeping his eyes busy with the array of food laid out in front of them. “Uh, thanks.” He said stiffly, going back to playing around with his food. “You’re not so terrible of a teacher, you know.”

Eleanor had listened to him intently, and it was true, everything he said about love. Hell, if she was talking to someone who was in the same situation as her, she would have said the exact same thing. But now she understood when some people said it was harder to accept the truth when you’re on the other end, receiving it. Frowning slightly she nodded at his words and looked down at her food, before letting out a soft sigh. When made a reply to the reflection she had made on him earlier, Elle glanced back up and tried not to cringe at his response. Honestly, she shouldn’t have said anything in the first place, it was obvious that her words still didn’t affect his opinion on himself, and she couldn’t help but feel slightly disappointed. Though, even if she regretted making the first comment, she couldn’t stop herself from making another one. “Look, not that it matters but I, personally, would choose a nice guy over a bad boy any day, and I’m sure I’m not the only one who thinks that,” she shrugged as she ate a piece of broccoli.  And it was the truth too, ‘bad boys’ from her experience, brought nothing but trouble to a relationship. Tyler was living proof of that statement. “To me, a nice guy means stability. Other people think they’re boring, but I don’t think that’s true. I can trust a nice guy, I can feel safe with them, I never have to second-guess myself or them.” Elle pursed her lips, all of a sudden she had felt vulnerable. Maybe what she was saying said more about her personal life than it did about Connor, and she wanted to stop, but she had almost laughed when Connor questioned if there was such a thing as being ‘too good’. Shaking her head, she gave the male a small, sheepish smile. “Just saying, I’d rather stay home and watch TV with a nice guy than- than, you know, go to a club with a bad boy and watch him blatantly flirt back with every girl he meets,” she scoffed, remembering Tyler doing those same things, afterwards blaming it on the alcohol. Her voice got breathless towards the end of her sentence and she shook her head once more. She hoped she didn’t seem as transparent as she had just felt. Clearing her throat, she smiled. “I don’t know, I’m just.. I don’t even know what I’m talking about, I’m sorry.” 

When he had accepted her offer to help him with the chopsticks and hadn’t said anything about her actions, Elle almost let out a sigh of relief, instead she accepted his compliment with a small smile. "Thanks. Maybe I should start my own class," she remarked. Elle had been worried that she had made him uncomfortable, but now, as she stole small glances at him as he ate, with very little struggle with his chopsticks, she noted, maybe she had spoken too soon. Elle could feel that something had changed in the atmosphere, it was more tense, and there was something else too, something that confused her, she couldn’t put her finger on it. Brows slightly furrowed and lips pursed, she toyed with her food as she thought. But even that was difficult right now, how was she going to deal with Tyler when she got home? No, she couldn’t think about that right now, it made her want to scream and cry at the same time, not something she wanted Connor to see presently. But Elle now felt that she had more than overstayed her welcome. Licking her lips, she set her palms flat down on the counter and looked up, pausing for a brief moment before turning to Connor with an apprehensive expression. “If you’re done, you know, we- I, could just clean up, then head home.” Elle suggested with a small shrug, “it’s getting late anyways,” she added without even taking a glance up at the clock. "You're probably exhausted."

Elle smiled, though it turned out more as a grimace. She pondered Connor’s words, turning it over in her head. He was right, that’s what a relationship should be, and now she realized that what she and Tyler had was so far from what he had just described that it made her stomach turn uncomfortably. Honestly she’d thought about ending things with him for a while now but.. “But we’ve just been through so much together, you know?” She was making excuses now, but it was true. Elle felt like she owed it to themselves to at least try to make the relationship work, they’d been together for so long, he was Elle’s first serious relationship, and it just didn’t feel right to give up so easily. Though it wasn’t like Tyler was giving tons of effort on his end either. When he cleared his throat, it pulled Elle out of her thoughts and her eyes looked up, silently hoping that she hadn’t zoned out too much. He mentioned his wife, and Elle froze, it was a touchy subject that she knew she shouldn’t delve deeper into. It wasn’t any of her business but she couldn’t help but make a comment about what he had said. “If it means anything, I don’t think you did something wrong. I mean, you’re kind, generous, selfless and I’ve seen your devotion to Cassidy, how you’d do anything for her. So I doubt that it was.. you know, your fault. Some people just don’t work, but I’m sorry if I’m way out of line here.” She almost flinched at her own words, her tone was hesitant and tentative, hoping he wouldn’t find her to be intrusive and simply just tell her to leave. Though she was careful not to say anything negative about his wife. She had been looking after Cassidy for a while now, and considering how much time she actually spent here, she only realized now how little she and Connor really talked. Sure they exchanged pleasantries, and they chatted sometimes when he would come home early and Cassidy would ask her to stay a little bit more, but it was always small talk. Never about their personal lives and things you would only discuss with your close friends. But when he picked up his chopsticks and attempted to follow her motions, light chuckles escaping him as he laughed at himself, Elle was thankful for the change in mood. It was more carefree now, and it slowly eased her, making her feel more comfortable once again. And she bit back her own laughs, not wanting to discourage him. Then, with a frustrated grunt, he set the chopsticks down and went on, calling himself a hopeless cause. “Oh come on! You can’t give up now!” It almost sounded like a whine, “you’re lucky I’m a determined teacher,” she teased lightly. “Here, you just-” and without thinking, she picked up his chopsticks that he set down and put in his hands. Then she held his hands in hers, moving his fingers into the proper position. She struggled slightly with wrapping her hands around his own, since his were considerably larger than hers, but it still worked. “See? It’s just.. it’s just like that..” Elle lead his fingers to move the chopstick up and down, though she couldn’t help the small stutter in her voice, and she hoped Connor hadn’t noticed. “There. You have it,” it was almost a whisper, as she looked up at him, her eyes meeting his and she was reminded of the same moment happening back in the living room. Blinking, she broke away from the eye contact and Elle proceeded on giving him an encouraging smile before looking down. Keeping her hands on his, she guided him on picking up one of the vegetables in his chowmein and slowly, she released her hold on him and sat back properly in her seat. She hadn’t even noticed how close she had leaned into him.

Although Elle’s response sounded believable enough, he still wasn’t fully buying into her story. Abusive relationship or not, if one wasn’t entirely happy and certain with the person they were choosing to share their life with, they had every right to leave. It was a little ironic of him to say that, seeing as that was exactly how his wife had felt towards him. He personally thought the two had been maintaining a healthy, and excitable relationship but it turned out that hadn’t been the case at all. When Rachel left not only him, but Cassidy behind, all hell broke loose inside of him. Showing emotions on the exterior was something that Connor struggled with at times, but unfortunately, that was only a facade. Of course, she had every right to leave, but that thought didn’t make it any easier on him. Being alone was a fear he hated to admit, but it was there. As a result, he wasn’t the best person to be giving Elle advice. Part of him wanting to encourage her to leave the relationship she was in, but the other half knowing how terrible it was to have your significant other disappear. “Yes, but does he make you happy?” He inquired, probably prying a little too much. Her being happy was really the most important part out of anything, and the question was simple enough to answer. She seemed slightly uneasy talking about her boyfriend, but all her answer required was either a yes or a no. Connor was obviously no expert in romance, but it didn’t take rocket science to figure out that nothing was worth it if one wasn’t happy. Noticing how quick Eleanor was to apologize despite it being his fault for being so sensitive to the topic, the male shook his head. “It’s not your fault.” He mustered up a smile but didn’t say much else, not wanting to drag on the topic any longer. After more than six months, one would think that Connor would be entirely over his ex-wife and prepared to find someone new, but it wasn’t that easy. It wasn’t just how much he’d loved Rachel, thinking that she was his forever. Walking into your wife in the shower with the man who lived across the street was an image difficult to permanently erase. He’d been so happy with her and yet everything still managed to fall apart - how did he know that wouldn’t happen again? The male was relieved at her strong effort to shift the focus onto something lighter, specifically his inability to use chopsticks. He flashed her a genuine grin, before letting go of the chopsticks. “This is usually when I give up and resort to using a fork. But it’s never too late to learn, right?” Meeting Eleanor’s eyes, Connor shifted closer towards her. He took note of the red tinge that spread across her face but made no acknowledgement towards it, although it only made the grin he wore even wider out of amusement.

Elle froze at his question, she couldn’t help but feel a little surprised at herself when she couldn’t immediately find any words to answer such an, or at least what seemed to be, an easy question. Biting her lip she glanced up at him and began to nod slowly. “Yeah..” Elle began softly, ‘he used to’ she thought, but instead continued with, “he does, I mean, not all the time, but nothings perfect, right?” She chuckled nervously as she reached up to scratch lightly at her neck. Elle couldn’t tell what made her feel more uneasy, the personal questions, or lying to Connor’s face, literally. But what would telling him the truth do? He was simply the guy she was watching Cassidy for, he paid her to babysit his kid. Not the other way around, he wasn’t Elle’s psychiatrist and she didn’t pay him to listen to her problems. Petty ones at that. She found herself once again, with her eyes on Connor and it made her think, about his own problems. He had so much on his plate already, and who was she to add even more onto it? When he spoke up, accepting her offer to help him with the chopsticks, Elle shook her thoughts away and brightened up with a smile. “Never,” she agreed. Picking up her own set, she slowly positioned them between her fingers, the way you would, raising her hands slightly to give Connor a better view. “It’s not too hard, really. You just hold the first one like this, like a pencil-” she followed her own directions, smiling up at Connor as she showed him, “and set this one on top and just hold it like that. Try it.” Elle nodded encouragingly and gestured at his own chopsticks. When she found the irony in the situation, it almost made Elle laugh. It was so ridiculous. Connor was a teacher for a living, and hear was she, teaching him instead.

Taking the box of chowmein for himself, Connor split apart his chopsticks despite knowing fully well that he was incapable of using them with ease. He toyed with his food as she talked, trying to keep a blank expression as if her love life didn’t actually concern him at all. Which in a way was true, but deep down he was curious. She seemed slightly uneasy at the topic of her boyfriend although he couldn’t blame her. It wasn’t really the type of thing you wanted to discuss with someone you hardly knew. Connor wasn’t entirely sure what her reply was supposed to mean, as one in a happy relationship normally wouldn’t reply with just ‘good’ as an answer. But he wasn’t in any position to delve further into the subject, and he didn’t want to come off as too interested either. The best option was to simply keep the questions casual. “Man-child, huh? I can definitely see the appeal of a guy like that. He’s treating you well though, right? I know it’s none of my business, but I like to make sure my nannies are well taken care of.” Connor grinned, swallowing down a bit of his food. His smile faded a bit once Elle shifted the topic to him, and he suddenly froze inside. He didn’t know why the question took him by such surprise, or why he was struggling so much to come up with an answer. Lying and telling her his love life had even the smallest shred of hope was tempting, but he’d never been the best liar. “Uh, yeah, everything’s great. Nothing’s really changed, but I suppose that’s a good thing. No more unexpected break ups.” He nodded, staring down blankly at his food. His wife cheating on him was still a sore subject that Connor always failed at making light of, and Eleanor already knew that. At the moment, the male had no interest in getting back into seeing people. Taking care of Cassidy and seeing pictures of his ex-wife and her new boyfriend on Facebook was already a handful.

Elle opened up her own box of chowmein, right after him and took a bite, picking up some of the noodles using her chopsticks and putting it in her mouth. When he continued asking about Tyler, Elle shifted uneasily in her seat. Usually, she was a very open answer, Elle was hardly a private person which could sometimes be a problem, but in this case, Tyler just wasn’t an easy topic for her to talk about. Their relationship... it was different, no relationship is perfect, of course, but still, theirs seemed a little too much. They fought and argued alot, and she noticed they never really work out their arguments, it was more like Tyler would brush their problems under the carpet and that was it. He just magically expected everything to be suddenly okay. And Elle would have to go along with it or else he’ll leave unexpectedly for a few days, no contact, no explanation, then he’d come back and his story was always the same. ‘I just stayed with some friends, nothing happened, I promise’ and she would believe him. So clearing her throat, Elle turned to Connor, her mouth slightly agape as she didn’t know what to say to him exactly. “Well.. yeah, I mean he’s not.. abusive, if that’s what you’re wondering. But thank you, for asking.” She smiled at him appreciatively, of course when he said he liked to make sure that his nannies were well taken care of, it was probably just common courtesy, but it still made her feel honoured. When it was his turn to answer her question about his own personal love life, it was clear it brought him discomfort, and immediately, Elle regretted asking him about it in the first place. She then remembered what Clarence had told her about his ex-wife, and this sudden realization hit her like a brick in the face. Flushing, she let out a soft, “..oh,” and shook her head. “I’m sorry, I wasn’t thinking.” With a half pained, half embarrassed expression, Elle eagerly looked for ways to change the subject. She then noticed him toying with his food, almost as if he was avoiding using his chopsticks (something she herself used to do). “I could help you with those, if you’d like,” she offered brightly. If her face was as red as they felt, Elle silently hoped Connor wouldn’t notice.

Before Connor could even stop her, she’d already made her way to the kitchen, digging through the food. He stood planted in his spot for a few moments, merely watching her out of slight surprise. Her staying over longer than necessary was nothing new, but still, he found it a little odd how Elle wasn’t at all hesitant to give up spending time with her boyfriend. She was still young, and as far as he knew, no one passed up the opportunity to do whatever they wanted on a Friday night. But this was her choice, and he wasn’t going to complain at all for the company. Blinking, the male nodded at her, a smile gracing his lips. Slowly, the male walked over to the kitchen counter and leaned forward on it with his hands as he watched her open up the boxes. He cleared his throat, not entirely sure what to say. Up till now, their encounters were solely limited to talks regarding Cassidy and occasionally extremely vague details regarding their personal lives. Aside from that, he didn’t know much about her besides the fact that she was a miracle worker when it came to taking care of kids. “So, um, I hope you like Chinese.” Connor said in attempt to break the uncomfortable silence before realizing how stupid that was of him to say. She was the one opening the boxes, it wasn’t much of a surprise that they were having Chinese food tonight. He forced out a short chuckle before clearing his throat once more. “So, uh, how’s everything going with your boyfriend? What was his name again?” Truthfully, he was pretty certain she’d actually never revealed the name of her partner, but hopefully she wouldn’t remember that. 

As she split apart her chopsticks, Elle couldn’t ignore the slightly awkward tension in the room that practically surrounded them. She knew he found it strange that she chose to stay, but honestly she wasn’t very eager to come home right now, she and Tyler had had a fight yesterday and they’d likely have another one tonight and just the thought of it made Elle internally groan. She was just so tired, and she had hoped that maybe having a simple dinner with Connor would lighten her mood and hopefully distract her from her personal issues. Then, as if he was reading her mind, Connor had asked about her boyfriend, and Elle looked up at him in surprise. She stared for a second, drawn at a blank as to what to answer before forcing a smile and turning back to her food. “Tyler, his name’s Tyler. And you know, things are..” The brunette paused, hesitating. She didn’t want to lie, Elle never felt comfortable with lying to people, but she didn’t want to burden him with her petty little problems either. “Good, I mean as good as a relationship with a man-child can get, at least,” she smiled at him and shrugged a shoulder before taking a bite out of one of her egg rolls. “But hey, what about you? Anything new for you in the romance department?” Elle questioned. It was a lame attempt at changing the subject, but suddenly she found herself really interested to hear his answer. Though if he had been dating, surely she would have heard about it, like asking her to babysit on a weekend so he could go out or something. But she also wouldn’t be surprised if he was, and was simply just keeping it discreet.