hi lovelies

Because guys like Dean Di Laurentis didn't look at girls like you.

Not really.

And definitely not twice.

But most certainly not in the way he was looking at you.

You were standing in line at a campus coffee shop, bundled into an oversized sweater, trying very hard not to notice the hockey players who had just walked in.

Then one of them stepped beside you “hey." That voice made the hair on the back of your neck stand.

You looked up.

Dean smiled.

Not a smirk.

Not some cocky grin.

Just a smile that, if you didn’t know any better felt genuine "hi?" You looked behind you as if he was looking through you, only to stupidly be faced with his teammates.

"I've seen you around."

Your immediate thought was that he was either blind or just s

Your second thought was that he was making fun of you.

But then he asked for your name.

And remembered it.

Because he showed up again a few days later.

And then again.

And somehow, against all logic, Dean kept choosing you.

Which six months later, left you still trying to understand why.

Not because Dean gave you any reason to doubt him. It was exact opposite, actually.

He was the most affectionate boyfriend you'd ever seen.

Which for a man that lived and breathed casual, it felt like you were waiting to wake up from this always.

Always touching you.

Always pulling you into his lap.

Always kissing your forehead.

Always looking at you like you were the prettiest girl in every room.

The problem was that your brain refused to let your heart accept it.

Years of insecurity didn't disappear because one beautiful hockey player loved you.

So most of the time they crept back in.

Like tonight.

You and Dean were at a team party.

The house was packed.

Music thumped through the walls.

Girls crowded around the hockey players.

And every few minutes you caught someone staring at Dean.

A blonde near the kitchen.

A brunette by the stairs.

Another girl who literally laughed and touched his arm while he was talking.

You knew Dean wasn't encouraging it because you knew he loved you.

But the little voice in your head was being particularly cruel tonight.

Look at them.

Look at you.

Of course they'd want him.

Why wouldn't they?

You found yourself drifting toward a quieter hallway.

Just for a minute.

Just to breathe.

Your feet carried you up to his room, the place you found yourself most nights.

A few minutes later you heard footsteps.

Then Dean's voice "thought I’d have to get some missing posters up soon.” You looked up to see him holding two drinks.

One for him.

One for you.

You forced a smile as your fingers dropped your bracelet “hey.” Dean immediately narrowed his eyes.

He knew you too well. In the few short months that you had been together, this man could read you like a book "what’s wrong?" He cocked his head as he shut the door behind him.

Dean handed you your drink as you frowned “it’s nothing.” You shook your head.

The boy crouched down in front of you “liar." He rested his hand on your knee as you looked away.

You knew it was one of those things that shouldn’t have been picking at your heart but it rang in your ears "it’s stupid." You pursed your lips together as you sucked at your teeth.

Deans fingers traced random shapes on the inside of your thigh "tell me anyway." You twisted the cup in your hands, clearly letting the mental coin toss play in your head.

He waited.

Patiently.

Eventually you sighed.

Tugging your fingers through your hair "I just-" You sipped at your drink as if it could buy you time.

Because you hated saying it out loud "I don't know." You shrugged almost wishing that he hadn’t caught you upstairs.

Dean stayed quiet.

So you continued "I look around at girls at these parties and they're all gorgeous." Your voice got smaller trying not to look stupid “then there's me."

Dean's entire face fell.

Not in annoyance.

In heartbreak.

Like hearing that hurt his soul “baby.” His hands pulled away from you.

As if he was walking on a tight rope trying to avoid hurting you.

You shrugged "it’s fine." You tried to convince yourself that it was normal to feel that way.

Dean was quick to disagree with you “it is absolutely not fine." You laughed weakly as you picked at the edge of your nail.

"It's not your problem."

The words didn’t get a chance to hang in the air before Dean decided that he had enough "the hell it isn't." Dean set his drink down on the floor and turned fully toward you.

His hands rested on your thighs "look at me." You hesitated and it made him repeat himself.

"Look at me."

So you did.

His expression was unbelievably serious "you think I settled for you?" He cocked his head as you almost looked annoyed.

Your eyes widened "what? No-" you went to explain yourself but he cut you off.

Dean wasn’t trying to argue with you but he really wanted to make sure that you got what he was saying “that's what you're saying." The hockey player sucked at his teeth “you think I looked at every girl on campus and somehow ended up with you by accident?"

You blinked as Dean leaned closer "I chose you." His words were both sweet and somehow effortless at the same time.

Your heart throbbed “Dean,” you couldn’t help it when you cracked a small smile.

His voice was barely a whisper “please listen to me.” His hand found yours as his squeezed.

It was as if you could hear a pin drop in here that’s how quiet Deans room was around you both "I like the way you laugh." Another finger intertwined with yours.

Still your heart pounded in your chest "I like the way you get excited when you're talking about something." All of the guys were used to listening to your tangents about what meats go on a sandwich or why the boys picked the wrong star in whatever Real Housewives collection they let you put on.

He licked his lips before he continued "I like that you snort when something's actually funny." You groaned knowing that it was something that he really wouldn’t let you live down.

Dean smiled as he nodded "I like every inch of you." Heat flooded your face as you scrunched your nose.

You sounded like a teen boy that had just been smothered in kisses by their grandmother "Dean." Your eyes rolled trying to act like you didn’t feel like you were drowning in love.

If you gave him the chance he’d kiss every inch of your body he’d do it "I do." Dean brought your hand up to his lips as he kissed your fingers.

His thumb brushed over your knuckles "you’re beautiful." You shook your head automatically.

Dean immediately caught it "nope." He narrowed his eyes at you like he had all the time in the world to deal with this.

"Dean-“

"No." He poked your cheek cutting you off "you don't get to argue with me about my own girlfriend." You laughed despite yourself.

"That's not how that works."

He stuck his tongue out at you "it is,” as he nodded.

"It isn't."

The two of you sounded like children "it absolutely is." His arm wrapped around your waist.

Strong.

Secure.

Like there was nowhere else he'd rather be.

"Besides."

He lowered his voice “do you know how obsessed I am with you?" His words sent shivers down your spine, shooting straight to your core.

You covered your face "oh my God." You shook your head as it was buried in your hands

"I'm serious."

You held back a laugh "you're ridiculous." Your cheeks were sore as you wanted his bed to swallow you.

Dean pulled your hands away as he wanted to see you "I am." He kissed your nose.

He had that smug look on his face as he had your total attention “but I'm also right." It was the truth.

Then your forehead.

Then your cheek.

Then finally your lips.

Slow.

Soft.

Patient.

The kind of kiss that felt like being wrapped in a blanket on a cold winters morning.

When he pulled back, he rested his forehead against yours “you know what I see when I look at you?" You swallowed almost nervous about what you’d hear.

"What?"

His eyes dropped to your stomach before they quickly went back to your eyes “the girl I want to come home to." Your chest tightened as you knew all about how he wanted three kids.

His thumb drew circles against your wrist “who I want in my jersey at every game." Getting to see you sat in the crowd was almost just as good as getting to get you out of the jersey.

Another kiss on your lips.

He stopped as he took the chance to really look at you, "the girl I can't stop thinking about." His voice was soft as if he was worried he’d scare you.

And just like that he was ready to hit what felt like the nail in the coffin "the girl I love." Your eyes immediately filled and Dean noticed instantly.

"Oh no."

You laughed.

You raised your hand to stop him "don’t." You blinked rapidly to avoid tears falling.

He was quick to tease you "oh, she's crying." You sniffled as you shook your head.

"I'm not crying."

The hockey player laughed as he shook his head "she’s definitely crying." You shoved his shoulder.

Dean grinned as he sat down next to you, quickly pulling you onto his lap.

The moment you settled against him, he wrapped both arms around your middle and squeezed.

Tight and protective.

Like he was proud to be holding you.

Like he wanted the entire world to know you were his “you know," he murmured into your hair, "those girls at the party?" You groaned, shoving your head into the crook of his neck.

The boy grinned as he ran his fingers through your hair “they can look." If anything he enjoyed getting the chance to show you off.

He didn’t stop there, no he was actually convinced he was going to be the most insufferable boyfriend that day “they can stare." It made him smirk how you squirmed.

Your cheeks reddened as you whined, "stop." He laughed as he shook his head.

His fingers danced over the waist of your pants "because at the end of the day?" His lips brushed your temple as he let out a soft breath.

Dean let his fingers rest under your chin as he forced you to look at him "I get the girl I want." That was more than any public claim mattered.

Too loud for Tucker’s liking, honestly.

Dean was halfway through his third beer and yelling at Beau over a hockey game playing above the bar. Garrett was trying to convince Logan to take shots with girls he definitely did not know. 

Tucker sat wedged between Beau and Dean in the booth, nursing the same drink he’d had for twenty minutes. 

Dean threw his arm over Tucker’s shoulders, “do you want to act like you want to be here?” Dean spoke dramatically as he sighed. 

Tucker didn’t even look up from his beer “I do want to be here.” He didn’t even sound convincing. 

Beau shook his head “look around, Malone’s is crawling with girls tonight.” He motioned to the surrounding tables of girls who were looking at them.

“And?”

Beau sent the boy a glare, “you have spoken to zero of them.” It was almost painful to the boys around them.

“Maybe I’m taking a vow of silence.” 

Dean snorted “no you’re being weird.” Beau was quick to clarify “more weird than usual.” Tucker flipped them both off without a beat.

Because the truth was simple: he wasn’t interested in anyone here.

Because he was already seeing someone.

Had been for months now.

Secretly.

Not because he was ashamed of you, actually, it was far from it. The problem was that the second the guys found out, his life would become unbearable. 

Garrett would become an overprotective father. Dean would question why you wanted to be with Tucker, and Logan would wonder how Tucker got you. 

So Tucker kept you to himself.

And you didn’t mind as you found it hilarious.

Especially tonight.

Because the second you walked into Malone’s, Tucker saw the exact moment Dean noticed you “oh my god dude.” Dean patted the boys chest as he pointed his head towards you.

Tucker took a sip from his drink as his eyes followed the blondes “what?” He cocked his head as he wondered what they wanted.

Dean nodded toward the front entrance “look at her.” Beau immeditely joined in “Jesus Christ.”

You were laughing at something your Allie said, pushing your jacket off your shoulders as you headed toward the bar.

Tucker bit back a smile, he had missed you “go talk to her!” Beau motioned to Dean to get up so that Tucker could move. 

But your boyfriend stayed calm “nope.” He shook his head as he smiled. 

He was intending to go nowhere “dude are you blind?” Logan groaned, getting involved. 

“She’s exactly your type.” 

“She’s anyone’s type.” 

Dean’s comment almost got a laugh out of Tucker. 

You glanced around, immediately letting your eyes land on Tucker in the crowded room as a tiny smile tugged at your mouth.

Dean caught it “oh my God,” he said looking like a kid in a candy store as he grinned “she smiled at you.”

Tucker leaned back casually “people smile at me all the time.” He tugged his fingers through the end of his hair.

Logan let out a snort as he shook his head “no they don’t,” Logan said.

The boys all got ready to push him in your direction “I am not doing this.” Tucker announced as he raised his hands in surrender.

Dean pointed accusingly “you’re scared.” His eye twitched as he almost wanted to hit the younger boy.

That got Tucker to look at him “scared?” Tucker raised an eyebrow slowly.

Beau grinned as he rubbed the boys shoulders “prove him wrong.” He urged Tucker to give it a shot.

You were fully aware of what was happening now. Tucker could tell by the way you were hiding your smile behind your drink.

Dean leaned across the table “ten bucks says he can’t even get her number.” The blonde was resorting to a bet to get Tucker moving.

Garrett snorted into his beer “twenty says he won’t even get half way there.” Garrett motioned to Tucker to get a move on.

Tucker sighed dramatically, setting his beer down “fine.” The table erupted immediately confirming that you knew what or who they were talking about.

“There he is!”

“Atta boy!”

“Don’t embarrass us!”

The boys all chanted as Tucker motioned to them to shut up.

You watched him approach with a dangerously amused expression.

And behind him, all of the guys were walking this like it was game 7 of a Stanley Cup final.

Tucker stopped in front of you.

You tilted your head innocently, “hi.” Your lower lip was caught between your teeth.

“Hi.”

Dean was practically standing on the seat trying to hear.

Tucker glanced back once at the table full of idiots watching him.

Then he looked at you again.

Without hesitation, Tucker slid one hand around your waist and kissed you.

Not quick, either.

A full kiss.

The kind that made your hand curl into the front of his shirt immediately.

The bar around you disappeared for a second beneath the whistles and shouting coming from the booth.

When Tucker finally pulled back, you were grinning so hard it hurt.

Behind him?

Absolute silence.

Dean looked horrified.

Beau’s mouth was literally hanging open.

Garrett nearly choked on his drink.

Logan slapped the table so hard the glasses rattled “huh?” Dean was almost speechless as he blinked repeatedly.

He shook his head “how did that?” He looked at Logan who was just as shocked.

Tucker didn’t even turn around yet almost amused that the boys were so shocked “you told me to talk to her.” He shrugged, making you grin.

“You kissed her!”

You shrugged, “he’s good with his words.” You tried to hold back a laugh as you never expected to meet the boys like this.

Dean recovered first.

Barely.

He looked between the two of you “this is absolute bullshit,” he declared as he knew that there was more to the story “there’s no way this just happened naturally.” You seemed too comfortable next to Tucker.

You were still tucked against Tucker’s side, laughing as Beau continued to stare at the two of you like you had told him Santa wasn’t real “thirty bucks,” Tucker reminded casually, holding his hand out toward Dean and Garrett without even looking at them.

They slapped their wallets onto the table in front of them “I can't believe this.” Dean grumbled as he shook his head. 

Logan was grinning now, delighted by everyone else’s suffering “this is my new favourite thing.” He laughed as he shook his head. 

Beau looked back at how you wrapped your arm around Tucker’s torso “you two know each other?” His words finally made the boys clock what was going on.

Tucker shrugged as he smiled “yep.” He shrugged grabbing the thirty dollars from the boys before he held it out for you to grab. 

You smiled as you took the money from him “thanks baby.” You pressed a kiss against his cheek as you slipped the money into your pocket.

Everyones face dropped, “baby!” Gasps travelled across the table.

Dean shook his head “I demand a redo!” He raised his hand as Garrett nodded in agreement. 

Tucker shook his head “you guys thought I didn’t have game!” He argued back as he squeezed your waist. 

Beau nodded as the other three went quiet, “y’know what it was kinda hot what you two did.” He confessed making the three boys glare at him. 

Tuckers cheeks turned red “so how did he get you anyways?” Logan asked as he watched you smirk. 

The truth was that Tucker needed a study partner and your professor nominated you. 

But your story was far more entertaining “have you seen this man?” You patted Tuckers chest making the boy turn even redder. 

The boys found this to be the funniest thing in the world “could have just asked me once I would have been swept off my feet.” Tucker felt like you were torturing him. 

And of course the boys were eating it up “this is perfect.” Dean quickly forgot about the bet as this all seemed far more entertaining to him. 

Tucker groaned “I hate all of you.” He grumbled pinching his fingers at your side. 

You smirked as you kissed his cheek “and you wonder why I waited to introduce you to them sweets.” The nickname rolled off of his tongue. 

Garrett laughed “how long have you been hiding her from us?” Tucker sucked at his cheek. 

“Spring Break?” 

What started off as Garrett simply being a good partner to have in bed quickly became more than that when your meet-ups started happening at any time of the day. 

At first it was just Garrett coming to keep you company in the library as you studied, but then he started coming over with take-outs and the promise of being good company before he’d spend the night. 

By the time 3 months had gone by, you had seen him more than you had seen Dean. 

Which was partially because he had been starting to see some mystery girl, but it was also because the blonde was sending you messages asking if you were free, whilst you were literally wrapped in Garrett’s arms “remind me to kill him.” Garrett grumbled as he heard your ringtone that you had for Dean play. 

It was womanzier by Brittney Spears “you know you can’t do that.” You laughed as you pressed a kiss into Garrett’s cheek before you answered your phone. 

You could hear the sounds of Logan and Tucker in the background, “please tell me you’re coming to the party tomorrow Squeak.” Dean borderline begged you as he leaned back into the couch. 

It made you smile as you felt Garrett nip at the skin on your neck “of course I will.” You promised him as you sent the brunette boy a glare.

His lips grazed your sweet spot on your neck “I will drag you out of your apartment if you don’t.” He warned making Garrett smirk into the crook of your neck. 

The blonde went to carry on but you cut him off “I promise I will be there now I will see you tomorrow, goodbye.” You practically threw your phone across the room once you knew you had hung up on him “I actually hate you.” You murmured as you pulled Garrett’s face up to yours so that you could kiss him. 

On the other side of campus Dean sat in the living room with the boys “so is she coming?” Logan asked, not bothering to look up from the TV as he was playing against Tucker. 

Dean nodded as he ran his fingers through his hair “she is but I think she’s seeing someone.” His words made both boys freeze. 

In their entire time of knowing you, you had never once kept a single thing from Dean. So for him to have a theory about you, meant that it was something pretty big that you were hiding “you don’t think.” Tucker trailed off as he looked at the empted space where Garrett usually sat. 

The blonde was quick to laugh “oh god no.” He shook his head “he gets under her skin like all the time she’d never.” Dean didn’t want to say it but he had a strange suspicion that the boys might have been right, even if he tried his hardest to believe otherwise.

The next day the party came and of course you were there, just like you had promised Dean. 

But as the blonde hadn’t arrived yet, you were enjoying your peace and quiet in the hall. 

Some guys spilled their drinks on the floor, Beau could be heard screaming the lyrics to some early 2000s song with other members of his frat as Logan and Tucker were in their very own game of beer pong where they just seemed to be drinking. 

“Well there you are.” 

You looked up from your solo cup to see Garrett grinning at you. 

And unfortunately for you, the boy you swore you wouldn’t touch in public was looking really good in that moment.

You raised your cup “here I am.” You nodded as you leaned against the wall behind you. 

Garrett stepped closer “you disappeared.” He mumured, shoving his phone into his pocket. 

“I was avoiding getting beer on me.” 

It made a laugh slip from his lips “smart.” He continued moving closer to you, until he was almost too close. 

You immediately glanced around the hallway even though nobody was paying attention, “that nervous look should be offensive.” It made your eyes go back to the boy “you should be nervous too if we can’t find Dean.” You whispered back as you shook your head. Garrett shrugged lazily “he’s always somewhere.” It was the truth, Dean had this ability to slip in and out of environments and atmospheres as if it were nothing.

“Garrett-”

The boy let his hands fall onto either side of you, locking you into the spot that you were in “we’ve been careful so relax.” His voice was soft as he reminded you that he was right. 

Because the two of you had become experts at sneaking around, late night drives, locked bedroom doors and pretending not to sit too close together in public.

The only problem was that Garrett had started pushing the boundaries recently. 

Touchier, looking at you for far too long when people were around. 

And the problem was that you were just as bad “relax.” He mumbled as he tucked your hair behind your ear “you look really pretty tonight.” Your stomach flipped as he nodded. 

“You can’t say things like that in public!” 

Your cheeks were reddened as you turned away from him “we aren’t in public.” He pointed out as you sent him a glare “oh you know what I meant!” Garrett grined as he shook his head. 

He apparently loved ruining your life because he leaned down to kiss you. 

It was quick and soft, almost innocent even.

But it was enough to make your brain completely short-circuit “you’re insufferable,” you mumbled against his mouth.

“And you’re not complaining.”

Unfortunately, he was right.

You barely had time to shove lightly at his chest when voices echoed from the front door.

Dean laughed when Beau announced his arrival “oh my god,” you hissed, immediately ducking away from Garrett.

Garrett looked amused as he shook his head “you act like we’re committing crimes.” He crossed his arms as he smirked.

“We may as well be.”

Before he could answer, Dean’s voice carried through the house “you said Squeak was here?” He asked making your eyes widen “saw her in the kitchen last.” Logan answered.

You immediately straightened your clothes while Garrett leaned casually against the wall beside you like he hadn’t just been kissing you seconds ago.

Dean appeared around the corner, still laughing at something Tucker said.

Then he saw you.

Then Garrett.

Then his eyes landed on the fact that Garrett’s hand was still resting suspiciously low on your waist.

And suddenly Dean stopped as his eyes widened “oh shit.”Logan matched his react as he realised what the other boy was looking at. 

You closed your eyes briefly as if you were bracing for impact.

Garrett, somehow still calm, lifted his cup “hey, Dean.” Dean looked between the two of you slowly.

As if his brain was buffering, struggling to process what was going on in front of him.

“What,” he said carefully “is happening here?”

“Nothing,” you answered way too fast.

At the exact same time Garrett said “we were talking.” And you swore you could have killed him.

Dean narrowed his eyes immediately “you two can’t even get your story straight.” He pointed between the two of you as your heart started pounding.

Around you, the party somehow continued, blissfully unaware of what the members of the house and you were dealing with.

Garrett’s thumb brushed against your waist absentmindedly.

Dean noticed.

And that was the moment everything completely fell apart as his eyes widened, “no.” You immediately stepped away from Garrett.

Dean rubbed his face with his hand “no!” He whined as he shook his head.

“Dean-”

“How long?”

Silence.

Which was apparently the worst possible response.

Dean stared at Garrett as he’d personally betrayed his entire bloodline. 

In that moment, you actually wondered what would happen if he caught Summer in your position “you’re hooking up with my best friend?” Dean groaned as he scrunched his face in disgust.

Garrett rubbed the back of his neck “when you say it like that-” he trailed off as his eyes focused on the roof.

Dean laughed, like actually laughed “how else would you say it?” He crossed his arms as if there was a better way for this to end.

Beau had joined the group as he laughed, pointing between you and Garrett “you were right!” Beau patted the blonde boy’s shoulder as he let out a snort.

Dean turned to the brunette next to him “not the time.” He shook his head making Beau raise his hands in surrender. 

Logan and John both laughed “knew we made the right call not betting on this.” It was now your turn to scoff, realising that you two may not have been as subtle as you once thought.

Dean turned back toward you, looking genuinely offended now “you kept this from me?” He pointed at Garrett as he cringed. Garrett opted to stay quiet until he was called in to be a part of the conversation.

You crossed your arms defensively, “because you’re reacting exactly like this.” You shot back as you knew that he was doing it because both of you were his friends.

“Because this is Garrett!”

Garrett looked insulted “I’m standing right here.” He reminded you both as he rested his hand on your shoulder.

Dean ignored him completely “he flirts with everything!” He whined as he didn’t want to think about this anymore, “so do you!” Garrett shot back as he pulled a face.

Tucker motioned to Logan and Beau to leave, but neither boy followed him.

Bastards.

You pinched the bridge of your nose “Dean can we please not act like he forced me into this?” You sighed as you begged the boy to remember that this was a mutual relationship.

Dean blinked, “wait.” He stopped you as he raised his hand to stop you.

He looked between the two of you again.

Then focused on Garrett and then looked back at you “oh my god,” he sounded like he wanted to wake up from this nightmare.

You and Garrett both gripped each other’s hands as if Dean was about to blow, “you actually like each other.” Neither of you spoke.

Garrett’s expression softened just slightly as he glanced at you, and honestly that made everything worse.

Because Dean saw that too “you’ve got to be kidding me,” he muttered as he threw his head back.

Beau leaned toward Logan nearby, careful not to speak loudly “this is kind of sweet.” He mumbled as he nodded, almost giving you his blessing. 

Like it mattered.

Dean whipped around as he scowled “nobody asked you!” If looks could kill Beau would have been dead.

Then he looked back at Garrett with narrowed eyes “if you hurt her, I will ruin your life.” Dean knew that he couldn’t put his foot down because you and Garrett already seemed too far gone.

Garrett nodded once “that’s fair.” He knew that the threat was bound to come eventually.

Dean didn’t stop there though “and if I ever walk in on something traumatic, I’m transferring schools.” You burst out laughing despite yourself.

Dean looked exhausted already “why are you laughing?” He pinched the bridge of his nose as he swore he was in his own hell.

“Because,” you grinned, “you’re being dramatic.” You teased the blonde boy who stuck his tongue out at you.

Dean rolled his eyes “I’m not dramatic. My best friend and my teammate have apparently been secretly in love behind my back.” He shot back like he hadn’t just dropped a bomb.

The words hung in the air.

Silence.

Your face heated instantly.

Garrett choked on his drink.

Dean’s eyes widened slightly “oh my god, I was joking.” Nobody answered him, leaving him feeling like he was going to burn up.

Beau screamed somewhere behind him as he hit Logan’s back “Jesus christ kill me now!” Dean whined as he walked off, leaving the two of you next to each other. 

Because as Hannah went up after Beau for karaoke, all Logan could focus on was the girl singing. 

The look he gave her made your stomach churn as it was the same look you often gave him. 

It was one full of love and hope, not for the person in front of them but for what the two of them could become together.

You had been Logan’s best friend since your first day in your freshman year. 

He needed a pen and when you offered up several different colours to him, something just clicked for the two of you. Leaving you inseparable ever since. The puck bunnies always asked why you had never done anything with Logan as his friends always asked if he was hiding that you were more to each other than the rest of the world knew. 

While you were always left being forced to smile and nod along when those questions came your way as you swore you two were just friend, you had to admit that it was starting to hurt you. 

Somewhere along the way you stared to like John, as more than just a friend. 

At first you played it off as something silly, but by the time you actually decied to rip off the bandaid and tell him how you felt. 

It was too late, not because Logan was taken but instead because he was looking at Hannah like she already had his heart. 

And tonight just reminded you of that as you were forced to sit there and watch as Logan looked at her like she was performing to a room of just him and her “I hate love.” You grumbled as you shook your head when you felt the seat next to you get taken.

Beau went to comfort you “shit,” he yelped as he drunkenly fell off of his chair. 

Your hand immediately clasped over your mouth “you good?” Your words were muffled as you tried to hold your other hand out to help him back up. 

The boy laughed, finally making you break too “ow.” He groaned as he stood back up. 

You shook your head “idiot.” You elbowed the boy who sent you a grin “at least I wasn’t just complaining about a guy.” He stuck his tongue out at you. 

A laugh left your lips again as your cheeks turned red “watch it or else I’ll push that chair.” Your warning made Beau grin as he sat on his chair again. 

When your eyes went back to Logan you saw him looking right back at Hannah. 

From that night you decided that you needed a break. 

A chance to pull yourself out of the situation. 

A moment to gaslight yourself into thinking that maybe you were wrong and Logan wasn’t in love with Hannah. 

And the only way you knew how to do that was to avoid him entirely. 

So that was exactly what you did.

And Logan realised something was seriously wrong when you stopped coming to the house entirely.

At first, it had just been smaller things.

Skipping movie nights. Leaving group chats on read. Suddenly always “busy” when the boys invited you over.

But now?

Now it had been almost two weeks since he’d properly seen you.

And Logan hated how much he noticed.

The house felt off without you in it.

Too quiet.

Nobody stealing fries off his plate. Nobody yelling at Dean for putting empty milk cartons back in the fridge. Nobody curled into the corner of the couch in one of his hoodies while pretending not to fall asleep during movies. Yet always ending up with a blanket wrapped around you

It irritated him more than it should have “she’s avoiding me,” Logan muttered finally one night when he walked from a run.

He thought the fresh air would clear his mind, but instead, he just found himself craving your company even more.

The boys all looked up from the living room at the exact same time.

Dean paused mid-scroll on his phone.

Garrett blinked slowly.

Tucker looked like he was trying not to laugh “what?” Logan asked immediately.

Dean stared at him for a long moment “you’re kidding.” He looked at the other guys to see if anyone else found it so funny.

“About what?”

Garrett physically set his drink down “oh my god, he actually doesn’t know.” He brought his hand to his mouth.

“Know what?”

Tucker laughed under his breath, “this is painful.” He mumbled making the blonde nod in agreement.

Logan frowned harder “can one of you just explain what the hell you’re talking about?”

Dean pointed at him dramatically “she likes you, idiot.” He was done waiting for Logan to get on the same page as everyone else.

Logan blinked.

“What?”

The room went dead silent.

Then Dean actually threw his head back laughing as Garrett looked personally offended “no way.” Logan stared at them. 

“No she doesn’t.”

All three of them groaned simultaneously as they hit their heads with their hands “yes she does,” Dean said immediately as he knew Logan was on a losing side of this battle.

What made it sad was that Logan was unaware of it all “massively,” Tucker added.

Garrett leaned forward “it is genuinely impossible to miss.” He pointed out as he rolled his eyes.

Logan looked between them almost nervous, “you’re messing with me.” He didn’t want to believe that they were all right.

Dean barked out a laugh “Logan, she literally follows you around this house like a lost puppy.” He didn’t even mean it in a bad way, it was just the truth. You just loved being around Logan.

“She does not.”

“She absolutely does,” Dean cut in.

Logan opened his mouth to argue again, but Garrett beat him to it “she sits beside you every single time we watch movies.” Without fail, your legs always landed up in his lap.

“That doesn’t mean-”

The blonde pointed his finger into the air “she does it because she loves getting a chance to cuddle you!” Dean interrupted as he shook his head.

Logan frowned slightly.

Beau pointed out as he walked into the house, “she also laughs at jokes that are objectively not funny when you make them.” Logan felt like the most unamusing person in that group half the time.

“That’s not true.”

One of the boys threw something at Logan as if it would knock some sense into him “dude,” Garrett deadpanned as he sent Logan an unimpressed look“you made a joke about a burnt grilled cheese last week, and she laughed so hard she cried.” Logan hesitated because maybe that one was fair.

Dean was already on a roll now.

“She brings you a thing of berries because she thinks of you.”

“She remembers your practice schedule better than you do.”

“She knows your coffee order.”

“She looks at you like you’re the only dude in this house half the time.”

Logan stared at the blonde, who continued to list things off

His stomach was starting to feel weird “she does not look at me like that.” He shook his head as the three of them exchanged a look.

Then Dean leaned back against the couch cushions dramatically “oh my god he’s stupid,” he muttered as he rubbed his face with his hand.

“Hopelessly stupid,” Garrett corrected.

Dean pointed toward the kitchen “last month you walked in wearing that grey hoodie she likes, and she genuinely forgot how to use a microwave.” Logan blinked as he swore that he never had that effect on you.

“What?”

Tucker nodded solemnly “tragic, honestly.” Not knowing if he was talking more about you or Logan in that moment.

Garrett laughed as he thought back to his favourite memory of you trying to hide your crush “and every time you touch her,” he did his best to hold back a laugh, “she goes completely silent for like ten seconds.”

Logan frowned harder, trying to think back.

Little moments suddenly started replaying differently.

You getting flustered when he threw an arm over your shoulders. How pink your face got whenever he complimented you. The way you always seemed to brighten the second he walked into a room “oh,” Logan said quietly.

Dean pointed at him again “there it is.”

Logan looked genuinely stunned now, like his world had stopped in that moment.

“She-”

“Yep,” Beau interrupted him immediately, not giving Logan a chance to come up with something wrong.

Silence quickly fell over the room as the boys waited for Logan to say something, “for how long?” Logan asked, his cluelessness made everyone else laugh.

Garrett shook his head “months, man.” Dean nodded in agreement as he ate his food.

Logan sat back slowly against the couch cushions.

And suddenly, karaoke night replayed in his head, too.

A switch had flipped in your brain, and you were stoic towards him after Hannah’s song. The way you barely looked at him afterwards. How you’d practically vanished from his life the next day.

Logan looked back at them “she stopped coming around because she likes me?” It was as if the penny dropped for him in that moment.

Dean’s expression softened slightly “she stopped coming around because she thought you liked Hannah.” Logan and Garrett all made awkward eye contact.

Logan blinked as he cocked his head “yep.” The boys all nodded in agreement before Logan had a chance to question it.

Logan ignored him completely as he stood up “oh, you are an idiot,” Garrett words were so quiet but still Logan heard everything he said.

Because the boys were right.

Days later, you didn’t know how you ended up at the boys place after a win. 

Well that was a lie, Beau and Dean practically dragged you out of your dorm after believing that you were becoming a decoration within your own room.

It was hard to say no to either of them when they started guilting you “I should go home.” You announced at the front door when the boys tightened their hands on your shoulders. 

Dean shook his head “look just have fun with us.” Beau mumbled into your ear. 

You sighed as they walked you into the house. Music echoed in your ears as people flooded around the first floor “we’ve got your back.” Beau added as he watched your eyes land on the boys. 

More specifically, Logan. 

The boy looked tired as he listened to Tucker recount a story that had him being overly expressive with his hands. 

His under eyes were dark as Logan looked almost like he wasn’t there anymore, at least not mentally. 

But when he finally saw you, he smiled. It was this soft, sweet one that almost looked delicate, like he was worried if he gave you anything more, that he was worried you’d run away. 

Your eyes drifted somewhere else in the room as you felt your heart throb.

It was killing you to not talk to Logan, but when you saw how Hannah smiled at something that Garrett said, you knew it was all because you could think about was what you didn’t have “c’mon let’s get you a drink.” Dean patted your shoulders as he pushed you in the direction of the kitchen. 

The boys kept on replacing your drinks every time you finished them. 

And you were doing a good job of throwing each newly refilled cup back like it was nothing. 

Song after song. 

Drink after drink. 

Every effort to avoid Logan went successfully. 

Time slipped away and the night grew older.

And before you knew it, you were drunk. 

Not the cute kind of giggly that wine got you. 

But the stubborn and determined drunk that tequila got you. And that’s when you decied that you had enough.

The air was cold when you finally left the party. 

You had decided that avoiding Logan was getting too much, so you left. 

The fall weather should have left your cheeks cool when the night breeze drifted past you, but instead, you felt like you were on fire. 

All your focus was on putting one foot in front of the other so that, by the time you made it to the sidewalk, the front door opened. 

You had created enough distance between you and the house “are you fucking serious right now?” Logan scoffed when he let the door shut with a slam behind him. 

Footsteps pounded behind you as you kept on walking fast. Which for someone who was as drunk as you were, wasn’t very fast at all “don’t,” you grumbled, knowing that he was steps behind you. 

Your fists clenched “what the hell is that supposed to mean?” Logan almost laughed as he furrowed his eyebrows. 

“It means just leave me alone!” 

Logan finally reached for you as you stumbled over your feet “I won’t.” He ended up in front of you forcing you to stop. 

A harsh sigh escaped from your lips “I’m fine.” You slurred, feeling your head spin. 

Alcohol tainted your tongue as Logan could smell it, “you’re so far gone.” He shook his head when he frowned. 

Your lips formed a pout “well aren’t you observant?” You stuck your tongue out at him as he laughed. 

You tugged your body back “so let me go home.” Your voice came out harsher than intended, and you were so drunk that you didn’t notice. 

He glared at you and you glared right back. 

And somehow that little moment sent the two of you over the edge “you know you have been avoiding me for damn weeks.” Logan was hurt and even if he tried to hide it, it still seeped through his voice. 

You rubbed your cheeks with your hands “not this shit again.” You groaned as you shook your head. 

“Yes, this again.” 

Logan wasn’t going to stop until he had a reasonable answer from you “you disappeared and acted like it was nothing!” He tugged his fingers through his hair. 

You finally looked at the boy’s eyes “look you didn’t even notice.” Your voice was barely above a whisper. 

It made the boy frown “of course I noticed when you weren’t around.” Logan clicked his tongue “hell you’re the first person I always look for in a room, even if I know you won’t be there.” His confession made your stomach churn. 

You shook your head “you don’t get to do this.” You raised your hand to stop him “look it’s bad enough you don’t like me back but don’t lie to me.” 

Logan crossed his arms “I am not lying jesus,” he scoffed as if he was offended that you even thought it. 

You looked up at the sky as you licked your lips “you love Hannah-” he tried to cut you off but you stopped him. 

Your hands wrapped around yourself, “and I need to learn to accept that you just don’t love me how I love you.” Your words came out and it was as if you had opened a can of worms. 

“In a way that makes me fine when you eat the last cookie or wait at the rink after games just so that I can be the first one to congratulate you or hug you, and god it’s in an unfortunate way that makes me hate you for not seeing me how I see you.” 

Silence followed your words as you felt your throat constrict, “oh god.” You groaned as you pushed Logan away from you, leaning into the dirt next to him. 

His hands immediately went to your hair as you threw up “let it out.” He cooed, rubbing your back as you whined. 

“I’m gonna die.” You groaned weakly, making him laugh “no you won’t.” 

You looked up at him in betrayal “I told you I love you and you are laughing at me?” You grumbled as you sent him a scowl. 

He shook his head “absolutely not.” He forced his lips shut “okay maybe a little bit.” 

Logan went back to rubbing your back “for the record I love you too.” The words slipped from his lips making you stand up. 

Your eyes were wide “you do?” Your voice was barely a whisper. 

He nodded “I was trying to stop it because I wanted to keep you as a friend rather than lose you altogether.” Logan let his hands fall to your hips. 

You melted into his touch “now please never leave me like that again.” Logan pressed a kiss against your forehead as you nodded.