can't find the words;

She figures that since she’s late, she’d better make a run for it. Guin has barely left her cabin, which felt so far away from her meeting spot with the other Veronica. She breaks into a sprint, phone still in her hand, and it’s then that she realises; Veronica will definitely get the joke. She’s heading to her own decryptor as she thinks. She’s getting closer, and Guin sees a silhouette. When she begins to smell that stuff that her friend loves so much filling the air as she approaches, she knows it definitely her, not someone else. She shoves the other girl in the shoulder from behind, a grin on her face as she pants and gasps for air. “Hey! Sorry I was late. Can ye help me wit’ somethin’? It’ll explain why I was late fer meetin’ ya, I promise.”

She has to take a moment to consider it. Guinevere feels so conflicted at this point. She knows that everything Arden is saying sounds and feels right, but she still feels like the lame can’t fully be shifted onto the randomness of the attack. “It feels like it, though.”

She nods, but it’s clear that Arden’s words aren’t really getting through to her. Guinevere feels at fault for everything that happened. She runs a hand through a few strands of hair that have come loose, fixing them behind her ear again. “They used my power  on others. They hadn’t even done anything wrong.. I haven’t even worked out how to do that myself yet.” She mumbles. Not that she’d want to, anyway, but it just made her feel so weak and useless again. This feeling seemed to be a constant here. 

Straight in there with the one subject she’d thought they would avoid. Guinevere has to admire the guts that Veronica has. She’s much bolder than herself, that’s for sure. Perhaps it’s why they get along so well; Veronica is exactly what Guin wants to be. A small smile forms, and she finally is able to look up at the other girl. “’M okay. Not amazin’, but I’ll be fine, don’t ya worry.” It was a blatant lie, but she hoped it was enough to get an suspicion off of her and how she felt.

She heard her voice before she really saw who it was that was approaching her. Fear takes hold of her heart, because as much as Guinevere loved conversations with this girl, who seemed to have gone through as much as her, she couldn’t face her, not after what had happened. The Eidolon had been so cruel to her friend, her only true friend here, and while she knew it wasn’t her own fault, she was scared her friend wouldn’t see it that way. She swallows nervously, unable to hold the other girl’s gaze. “I don’t know. Are ye okay?”

She’s not really one to open up to people. Guinevere feels like this incident has given her even more reason not to, given how it had left her feeling, but it’s then that a thought comes to her; if the Eidolon can read her thoughts anyway, she’s got nothing left to hide. Their enemies can read her weaknesses easily, meaning there’s no point trying to keep everything she’s carried inside for so long within her. She can feel tears brewing. “No. I’m not.” 

She glances down at her hands, which can’t seem to stay still any more. She appreciated Arden’s words, for she felt that they got along, in the conversations she’d had with her. She takes a deep breath, feeling a chill as the wind blows. The camp had felt colder ever since the incident, even though the Eidolons and Christmas were long gone by now. “I feel like I could’ve done something. I feel like I didn’t do enough.” She explains bitterly. 

25. She used to be much more trusting, and wouldn’t suspect anyone of doing anything against her, but that was until the drama with her father lying. While she has the ability to sense when she’s being deceived, she finds it much more difficult to relax and actually believe that people aren’t trying to gain something from her. If she’s close with the person, she becomes even more suspicious (given what has happened in the past).

37. After leaving behind the village, she’s not as concerned with either of them as she once was. Had you met Guinevere this time a year ago, the answer would have plain and simply been guarding her status, as she was one of the people that all the standards were set on, but now, that is shifting gradually. She doesn’t really believe in honour, as she’s ashamed of herself and the things that she has done, but she doesn’t believe in guarding her status either (mainly because she hasn’t got much around camp, but also because she realises how fickle it is).

Cabin 41.