A.J. (the cool one, pretty much)

twarinn

25-35 is such a weird fucking age because you’re 100% a bread-and-butter Standard Edition Millennial but the cool teens are like “ok boomer” because you have a Real Job but the actual Boomers at your job are like “I’m not going to listen to a literal fucking child” as they download 16 self-replicating viruses and meanwhile the Gen Xers are telling you to refinance a mortgage for a house you don’t have and you’re sitting there at the Adults Table with the pretty tasty casserole you cooked because you’ve finally figured out how to do that now but everyone is eating the Boomer’s store-bought macaroni instead and admittedly they do sort of taste similar so it probably wasn’t worth all the trouble of cooking from scratch and you’re trying to comfort the freshly-graduated sobbing 22-year-old next to you because she just woke up here and doesn’t know where she is but you have like maybe 5k dollars in a savings account labelled RETIREMENT that grows approx. twelve cents a year and you keep eating dry macaroni while smiling incomprehensibly and periodically blacking out like ??????????

You know i just reblogged this but im reblogging again to say i keep looking at baby jesus with the lighter and cackling madly because i love this so much

this makes me laugh every year

The Ellis family had only built the 7-foot-tall menorah… because their sons, ages 5, 7 and 9, had asked their parents if the family could decorate their home like the neighbors did for Christmas. This is America in the 21st century.  Please reblog, even if you’re not Jewish.  Especially if you’re not Jewish.  Spread awareness and let your Jewish followers know that we’re not alone.

I CAN’T BELIEVE I FORGOT ABOUT THIS

that comment dropkicked me into next week