Ik I'm "mentally ill"

I wanna die so badly. My two best friends are leaving my messages on seen, they're getting so annoyed by me at this point. One of them said that I was manipulative but idek how maybe i am. Ik that people don't like me much anymore and there's fuckall point in living in this shitty world anymore. Like why am I having to live? There's fuckall to do. I have no qualifications. No life. Now we're in quarentine and I've just been figuring out the best way to kms so my family won't be the ones to find me. I don't have the balls to jump but at this point idc. I'd rather od or something but the trouble is trying to find something to od on. Maybe if I shot an entire bottle of vodka I can do it, n if I'm found it can be see as an accident so I won't be put on any hold in hospital. I just wanna fucking kill myself or cut myself but nothing is sharp enough

feeling

Fuck

Nothing

Idk who reported me, but thank you. Idk what's gonna happen from now on but I appreciate it ❤️