Weed and Anorexia
I hate the fact that (some) people think I'm an addict,stoner, etc. And I'm too ashamed to explain just how much cannabis helps me.
Am I a daily user? Yes. Am I an advocate for cannabis? Absolutely. Do I have internalized stigma surrounding my cannabis use despite having medical/professional recommendations to do so? Also yes.
I originally began using cannabis for my insomnia. It has been a huge help with that. I used to be on a ridiculous amount of medication for sleep from a young age, and I am so thankful to have something that eases my insomnia without drugging me up.
But another huge benefit to cannabis is the fact that I CAN eat when I use it. I don't turn into some stereotypical stoner with the munchies, but I AM able to recognize I don't eat enough and to have sometimes a snack or a meal without the physical discomfort, and allows me to manage the psychological discomfort as well.
Its not a fix, it doesn't make me suddenly able to maintain my weight. I know I need to be able to eat without cannabis, and I do. Weed just makes it a little easier. It's slowing down the weight loss. Its letting me manage just a little better.
And I find it incredibly shameful to tell people that I smoke because I can't eat and sleep. I can't manage basic physiological functioning, so I resort to a substance. However, I would still prefer cannabis to the cocktail of pharmaceutical drugs they would have me on instead. And, cannabis is legal. I'm doing nothing wrong, but it still feels shameful.
