this breakdown is horrible..cuz there are no specific words to describe what I feel..I'm just so angry..awfully angry.. it's like breaking a deaf person's finger..~
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@fr3d-flintstone
this breakdown is horrible..cuz there are no specific words to describe what I feel..I'm just so angry..awfully angry.. it's like breaking a deaf person's finger..~

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I'm happy that you have found your true soul mate now.... I guess I was always a lie. I was never true in your eyes .... I made a lot of mistakes in our relationship from the start to the end that I'm not proud of in any way.. I feel that I will always make a lot of mistakes as the years pass and it will all depend on how i comfront them that will make a difference...I'm really sorry for everything I made you go through ...... one thing I know is that I will never find My true love or my soul mate ever again.....
I've tried to move on and be happy..which I was for a coupel hours a day, but I'm cursed.. cursed for life...... there's not a day I don't think of you.. there's not a day I don't pray for you. I pray for guidance, to forget about you, to make me strong and to not break down... which happens too often. But enough about me.... I see you are doing good and you're happy I really wish you the best of everything.... I hope you give him everything in every aspect and that both of you talk over every problem and solve it together, don't ever put them aside or think it's okay for now like we used to...you will always be in my heart no matter what happens.. I could always love someone as a person but I'll never be in love with them. The love of my life is you, you took my heart ...Every feeling, thought, and mindset of you was always true... I never lied to you about my feelings for you or what I thought of you...the good alway took over the bad on my eyes for you.. I die inside knowing I'm not the one,.... but I'm at fault for everything. I created my destiny... i will take the consequences of every action ive taken .......

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It's one I'll never forget
August 20, 2021
Blue lake Sierra Nevada mountains backpacking trip. Looking forward for another get away from society and mind troubles.
Lost woods + “In The Woods Somewhere” by Hozier

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I’m literally so tired of every fucking thing
“The worst thing is when the person you used to make memories with, becomes a memory.”
—

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I'm lost