bleh :P

and then on the branches themselves. Shoot: Blank is the lightest of the three but it intrigues me on phi's disregard of her own life + care for sigma's life being risked, distrust of others (specifically carlos), and her insecurity over her appearance (...not to shoehorn my headcanoning of phi as trans but its true to me here). Don't Shoot is insanely tragic in how phi resigns herself to death and sigma and diana's pain over her death of course, but what makes it especially impactful for me is the flashback with phi and diana at dcom. phi's vulnerability in that moment for someone so closed off and diana's affection for someone she barely knows is sonso heartbreaking to me it destroys me to watch. and then probably the most devastating in my opinion is the dreaded Shoot: Live. it's a genuinely horrific nightmare of a situation; sigma dies to the gun's blast. phi's absolute breakdown (especially when shes known to be someone much more emotionally closed off) in grief just crying and then screaming at the end after diana's suicide out of guilt is insanely heartbreaking ill never recover from it.

in vlr Phi isn't really that self sacrificing - in K end shes got "I don't want to live if it means being in debt to you" and obviously her suicide due to radical-6 but that's about it and one of those is influenced by rad6. in zero time dilemma though, she's MUCH more self sacrificing to the point of disregarding or ignoring the fact that she'll die in some ends and prioritizing the safety of sigma and diana. why she becomes like this i'm not sure, though a multitude of reasons are possible to me (personally I think either the revelation of becoming a shifter = death does not mean as much, her intense care for sigma and diana, a result of trauma from VLR, or a mix of these/something else but its worth noting because she has a generally Interesting perception of herself and is known to be insecure to a degree)

some noteworthy examples of this in ZTD:

in Execution: D - in all of the Execution fragments all the characters (and i mean all of them not just the others in D-Team) have a moment where they freak out about the deaths and try to take their collars off. EXCEPT phi, she barely reacts other than telling sigma to jump

I talked a bit about Fire here but phi's INCREDIBLY self sacrificing here and constantly deflects on that she'll die and begs diana to save sigma instead. in shoot: blank she argues with sigma for a while about how "the ends don't justify the means" and how it wasn't worth risking sigma's life to save hers. in shoot: live in the middle of her breakdown she outright says she "didn't matter at all". don't shoot is the only outcome she's satisfied with, but that's where she DIES

in Suppression as she's dying and Diana's about to lose her, Phi says that it's okay as long as diana survives

it's understandable in Outbreak why she'd try to sacrifice herself to stop the spread of rad6 but she's so.... intense with it. the moment shes injected she runs off (...probably to kill herself so nobody else has to before the cave in but I'm not entirely sure there) and she basically BEGS diana to kill her with such intensity and trying to rush her to get it done and over with that its just like.... it's ceazy

untitled document roulette for you wahey! take this random thing i dont even remember writing or what the context is for it but I like it

Had to wrangle you in discord dms to find out WHICH ONE THIS WAS BECAUSE THERES 3 FOB TITLE ONES but heres a bit more than a snippet. Have 2 fucking paragraphs. this is old (like 2024?) some of the way this is phrased isnt my favorite but i still like it

second art fight attack!! i’m crashing into bed after i finish posting this lmao it’s like 11 46 pm rn