𝓐𝓻𝓽𝓮𝓶𝓲𝓼𝓲𝓪

another second passes as he takes a deep breath and closes his eyes to extinguish the flame behind them, thinks he really may have overstepped a boundary after seeing how agitated she got, that he said something he shouldn’t have, and his features soften when he looks at her again as though in an unspoken apology. “you’re right; you’re not alone. all i’m trying to say is that you should stop trying to push everyone away from you, like you’re better off that way – you’re not, and i know you know that.”

giving in tastes like defeat again, feels empty like resignation always does, but he’s so tired, so exhausted from fighting for a place that was never his to begin with, that he just isn’t sure he can win anymore. “fine,” he breathes quietly, barely loud enough for her to hear. “fine. if you want me gone that badly, i’ll leave. i’ll do the rational thing and pretend, like you said.” i should be good at that by now, he thinks somewhat bitterly, but swallows the words. “just know that i’ll always be there, okay? i’ll always care.” that’s the last stand he’ll put up, all that’s left of his resistance: a stubborn guarantee; the promise that what kindness they shared once won’t fade into a part of their pasts to be forgotten, that if she ever does find herself alone, there will always be a place to turn to.

in the end, he’s selfish with that too – even now, he refuses to truly become a stranger; all he can do is agree to pretend. 

she doesn’t get the enigma that’s junseo. 

its frustrating to see him like this--to track one way and then diverge and slam into another, anger contorting his face for a moment before sliding away into resignation and an apology unneeded. it makes her scoff, the pit in her stomach growing as she treads once more, with a petite foot down onto his pride, like a audience to the derailing of a train that she couldn’t stop.

“ stop feeling for me.”  she orders. her heart twinges, just for a split moment of a second as he flares into an unfamiliar tirade. she’s used to hearing things like this from junseo--his emotional capability allowing him the irrationality and impulsiveness she often did not allow for herself. “why are you giving in?” its almost a reflex to ask the question, words falling from her lips before she could even stop herself, like split milk scattered on the ground, unable to retrace its steps. 

she shakes her head, a sigh almost falling from between her lips as her brows knit together, and she erases the previous sentence from personal memory. it sounded too much like a demand or a cry for help--and she--needed, no help. stubbornness etched itself into her features as her lips set into a thin line, and she wonders, if only for a faint moment, if she had momentarily pushed a little too far. 

he bled like an open wound in front of her, running his mouth and lines of anger clutched in his hands. 

“i don’t want you to leave. its not...” her face turns aside, a momentary lapse of her relenting into his angered tirade, an acknowledgement of something, even if it faded from recognition before anyone could even notice it there. “you shouldn’t be caring for someone who doesn’t want to care.” her final words are soft but halting, lingering gently in the light in a moment of genuine care and concern--just the barest little trickle, sublime in her tone and awkward in her stony exterior. 

restless.

𝐭𝐡𝐞𝐫𝐞’𝐬 𝐚 𝐜𝐞𝐫𝐭𝐚𝐢𝐧 𝐥𝐞𝐯𝐞𝐥 𝐨𝐟 𝐩𝐫𝐞𝐬𝐬𝐮𝐫𝐞 𝐡𝐞𝐫𝐞. good pressure, jinsol processes, as he sits down with sia, one of his sunbaes from within the company. despite having a career of his own with CHARM, he cannot fathom here that he is going to have some features on her album. the creativity process is not something he is partaking in at this opportunity, but even so, it is a blessing and wonderful thing to already be showcased in some way or another. there remain a few demons that dance on his left shoulder that cast a shadow on his own skills in rap, but he’s in good hands. he will take any critique that comes his way, and wants to deliver his lines the way that sia envisions it. 

“i am putty in your hands, sia-ssi.” jinsol blinks fondly, hands clasped as he stays level headed to keep his cool. “what is it that you will require me to do?” it’s not so different from his usual recording process, but it’s always a peculiar experience without the bond of all his group members. the masses. CHARM does have so many members, and it’s in a good way, even when divided into segments for his rap unit. rap unit. that’s right. he has to deliver, and he will represent both his group, himself, and sia appropriately. at least the intent is there. now for execution. 

@fmdartemisia

sia blinks, almost like an owl as she watches jinsol with an eye of a hawk and a slight air of nervous boredom that knits her brows together as she watches jinsol take the seat in front of her, hands clasped and pretty face in a nervous array as she watches him with sharpened eyes and calloused hands. she’s fucked, sia thinks, almost feeling the growing pit of horror slowly building in the pits of her stomach as she watches jinsol with something almost akin to a borderline nervous cat energy, claws out, eyes wary and cautious, and completely on her toes. 

its her first album, and as usual, the perfectionist in her deeply and sorely refuses to produce anything less than what is perfect and what is amazing. 

and from experience in her university, that usually meant clashing with others, especially on the direction she wanted to go. 

but still. she recalls her manager baring her teeth at her and hissing be nice! through the windows, cupping her hands as she narrows her eyes down at the impasse currently situated between the both of them, the small studio that she used in the company packed mostly with musical equipment and the lack of other, remaining human bodies. 

“jesus, relax. you’re making me nervous too.” the first thing she does is curl her legs up on her seat, trying to find the easiest and most comfortable way of sitting without seeming a bit too informal. “ just relax first and find the most comfortable way that you wanna sit.”  she ordered, swivelling the chair around as she turned around to face the window that her manager was standing pressed up against, eyeing them with a watchful eye. what do i say now? she mouthed at the manager, a little caught in the loop and a little frantic for help. i don’t know how to talk to people. she gestured a little wildly, finally grabbing onto a stress ball in the corner, before whipping back to face jinsol, hard candy cracking beneath her teeth and what she hoped seemed like a genial, amiable smile upon her lips. 

“ tell me first though, have you heard the track? like just the music itself. give me your opinion on the feel about it.”  a few clicks on the keyboard as she she sets up the recording booth, toes clad in the most atrociously coloured toe socks as she blinked owlishly in his direction. “i want to hear your feel and thoughts about the flow, or how you should rap. you should at the very least, have a bit of the idea, or else you wouldn’t be able to grasp the flow of the rap correctly.”  she pointed out, the possibility of her sounding a tad too harsh completely going over her head as she narrowed in her focus on music and music only. 

“hey! juju’s a cute nickname,” she says rather defensively because it’s what sia happens to call hyeju. she’s not the type to give out nicknames to her friends, but she doesn’t mind being on the receiving end. with a shrug, she lets out a raspberry at the thought of why people named their children the way they did. “at least we weren’t stuck with something terrible is all i’m saying.” there are definitely worse out there, and she thinks hyeju is nice despite the connection it gives her to her family. 

it was always entertaining to see how divided the opinions on lipstick’s title tracks were even among the members. the only consensus seems to be that genie good, but she’s not sure if that’s because they genuinely like the song—like she did—or if it was because it was their hit song which eventually opened doors for making money. she wouldn’t blame any of her members if it was the latter though. hyeju’s made enough money to probably live out the rest of her life now through lipstick activities. “how much hardcore? i don’t want to wear anymore leather, okay. run devil run was a debut song was the end of the world for me.” she shudders at the thought of those leather outfits and how it was impossible to be comfortable in them. she would rather have the booty shorts or whatever. 

“it’s...a preferential nickname. you’ll learn not to like it when you have a gossipy older brother who uses your childhood photos for his personal use of garnering fans and followers on his instagram.” sia crossed her arms and sniffed. “i have an image in particular to uphold.” she huffs, “and that image is one of being silently intimidating and behind the scenes.” her bones crack just a little when she shifts, a groan passing right through her lips as she whined a little, cracking her eyes a little more open to glance more at hyeju. 

she glances at hyeju for a moment, trying her best to determine if the other was serious in listening to her words and opinions for a moment. 

“well.” she pouts for a moment, delving a little deeper into the sofa. “i honestly would choose any particular concept for it. more like--anything that works and is comfortable would be the thing and concept i’d go for, even if its a hardcore song or music. because you know? anything can be hardcore, as long as you put your heart, mind and soul to it. you could just stand on the stage with a plain pair of shorts and a shirt and a microphone in hand, and still if you pulled off the performance rightly, it would be considered as really cool and potentially hardcore too. so i never understand why exactly that they have to confine us in a particular box of concepts really.” 

ko jueun (artemisia) aesthetics + self para -- promises and hair

she first chops off her long, dark locks when she’s 12 and her brother’s just fired from his company, a scissors in hand, and crudely, choppy wavy hair, nastily cut and eventually neatened as she became a trainee becoming one of the core trademarks that she’s recognised by, apart from the varying colours. when she first makes a comeback after idle song with her dark hair after years of endless damaging of her roots and scalp, her second brother takes a look at her and cries. 

word count: 645 words

aesthetic + headcanon: instruments and things that sia uses for production

the little things over the years that sia has used over time, as well as learned over time. challenges from her high school teachers in seoul arts high school for constant musical stimulation, and her love for learning and putting herself entirely in music and its production setting for the base and cementing her supposed “thought” of becoming a music producer in the near future. 

 word count: 1,446 words

“blame my mother or something.” it comes out rather bluntly as does everything when it comes to talking of her family. hell, she doesn’t even know if her mother’s the one that named her. she could very much be wrong. now that she thinks about it, it might be likely that it was her grandfather instead. “also, i don’t hate the song.” there’s other songs in lipstick’s discography that she would state she dislikes, but she’s not sure about hate. “i just don’t think it’s catchy enough. impactful, you know? i want something more like bang or even first love. something that’s more of a banger.” 

sitting up so that she isn’t sprawled across sia, she raises a brow towards the younger female. “which part of it do you hate so much?”

“i mean, i don’t get why i’m called jueun either.” sia all but glances right down at hyeju past her nose, with raised brows. “as it is, i only see it as a highly embarrassing name that resulted in the nickname juju.” she picked her nails as she sucked a breath through her teeth. “hate is dislike, just stronger. so either one way or another you don’t like it, so is there really much of a difference?” she never gets the reason why people tended to choose different ways of saying certain words, just to make things sound much nice. if there was one word to describe everything aptly, shouldn’t they do so just to save some kind of energy?she sucks on her teeth, brows furrowing contemplatively as she reaches down, wriggling a little more to settle herself comfortably into the sofa, a groan passing through her lips as they both sink a little deeper into the sofa.

“oh god, don’t remind me of first love. until now, i still feel as though they cheated me of it, letting me only do one line of the piano thing for it.” she lets a mocking grin spread over her lips, a huff of disbelieving laughter passing through parted tiers with a repressed sigh. “i don’t hate it per say. it just doesn’t sit right with me. more like, it sounds stupid music wise.” she scrunched her nose. “not that old school is stupid, but more like--its 2021, i wish they stop doing these kind of things to lipstick really.” she stretched a little, yawning. “i want more hardcore stuff. hardcore stuff is great.” 

Ko Jueun (Artemisia) Relationship Aesthetics  + Self Para: Doyoung

he’s the most consistent of all of her friends, excluding her best friend, miyeon, like a neverending wave that comes crashing back onto the shore. two years of friendship, and sia never thinks much about relying on doyoung, even if she unconsciously does so, because no matter how many times she flees from him and denials everything in front of his face, he still remains.

word count: 763 words

a/n: pls don’t read rip, i don’t even think i make sense OTL

hi, so sia’s finally getting a full promoted album in may and i have a list of some songs that have features that are going to be on her album. if you’re interested in featuring, do hit me up either on discord or here on sia’s account / youngjoo’s account! like this post and i will also drop in to ask you! my apologies for the spam, but i do need the features T-T

DDING (title track) : jvcki wai, osshun gum, han yohan, yang hong-won

features: one male presenting rappers [ two spots taken by andy and san ]

fadeaway : jvcki wai, bassagong, coogie, paloalto, the quiett

DDING (title track) : jvcki wai, osshun gum, han yohan, yang hong-won

features: two male presenting rappers [ one spot taken by andy]

fadeaway : jvcki wai, bassagong, coogie, paloalto, the quiett

DDING (title track) : jvcki wai, osshun gum, han yohan, yang hong-won 

available credits : partial production, lyrics (there’s 2 open partial lyrics credit slots for this) , composition [ andy: partial lyrics ] features: two male presenting rappers [ one spot taken by andy]

fadeaway : jvcki wai, bassagong, coogie, paloalto, the quiett

available credits: partial production, lyrics ( there’s 3 partial lyrics credit slots for this), composition [ daesung : partial lyrics ; alex : partial composition ]  features : three male presenting rappers [ one spot taken by daesung ]

fntsy ft jvcki wai : SoYoON! , jvcki wai

available credits : partial production features: taken by charlie

her words draw them away again, she’s like a glass pane crashing into the ground, sparkling, reflecting, cutting into everything and he just lets it go. used to it by now. pointing his chin to the sky where she mentions and coughing up a laugh at the lack there of. “yeah…” he peers at the wide open sky, not a twinkle in sight, “there’s probably a star somewhere. i think i saw one.” that’s an offering because he doesn’t want her to be embarrassed. looking back at her as she looks up, frenetic searching the sky as he searches her profile. “sia,” a caution flag in his tone, “if you’re having a hard time, you don’t have to have it alone.” he offers it like a rebirth, restart, begin the night again like it hadn’t started as it had.

she doesn’t expect him to agree instantly. 

but doyoung has always been the most consistent of everyone that she’s met, silent like a rock, and as steady as the calmest sea, crashing against with a rhythmic pulse against the darkened beach that was her own conscience. 

“sorry.” she’s barely able to tolerate the look from his eyes, lips pursed together in a thin line as she watches quietly, the words the materialize in a flare of warm gold from behind his lips. his words cascade over her like a torrent of an unstoppable flood, wrapping her in unfamiliar warmth as she fidgets in her shoes, facial muscles twitching ever so slightly at the unexpected shame that surges in the pit of her belly, roiling like a little snake that finally settles when she grits her teeth and turns her face stubbornly from his sharpened eyes. 

her jaw clicks together, clenched with the mildest chagrin as he intrudes--just as he always does, into her life once more, drawing a sharp look of utter disbelief from her as she spared a glance in doyoung’s direction, a sigh permeating from her lips as she scoffed a little in deepening disbelief. 

“you...really don’t learn when it comes to not meddling in my affairs, don’t you?” there’s a subtle twinge of the softest appreciation in her tone, almost akin to genuine admiration for his neverending tenacity. “sometimes, i look at you and wonder--which is more durable, your endless tenacity or the world’s most..i don’t know, durable rock.” she raises a brow at him, slight exasperation edging her voice as her gaze softens upon him, shifting with the slightest discomfort at the shift of tenderness she felt in her chest at his cautionary words. 

“it’s honestly...stupid.” she feels as though she’s twelve and in front of one of her brothers, bowing her head and confessing to being the mastermind behind the most recent broken vase, ashamed and filled to the brim with nervous that shouldn’t be present. “my brothers would love to meet you one day. you’ll get along with them, they’re forever on my heels, nagging about things i should care about, even my love life.” its a last, botched attempt to misdirect him away from the topic they were slowly bridging at hand once more, the nervous dart of her eyes a telltale sign as she anchored her teeth into her bottom lip, shoulders hunched upwards in consternation as she blinked up at doyoung as innocently as she could, with just a tad more of an expression. “the only thing that’s different from them is, you don’t want to embarrass me sometimes, which my brothers don’t. like..just now. with the stars in the skies.” the sentence alone is explanatory enough about what she was referring about, the slight jerk of her head tenderly sheepish as she huffed out a laugh. “anyway, it’s honestly nothing much of a specialty. just...” her feet scuffed against one another, a habit that had slowly formed often whenever she wrestled with her self on confessing what was bothering her to others. doyoung would surely see through her words, with the last two years of prior experience--she scrunched her nose slightly as she pursed her lips together one last time. 

at this point, hyeju’s convinced that bc is being lazy. ticket’s not a bad song, but she thinks they could have spent some more time finding a more interesting song for this comeback. on top of it all, recycling two previously releasing singles and shoving it into this poor excuse of a new mini album screams incompetent. it’s like the company doesn’t know what to do with the newfound wave of interest that came along with lipstick’s appearance on queendom. is it that hard to make a song like genie again? or maybe even something performance-heavy like first love or bang. she just wants a song that leaves an impact. 

she’s busy with her own individual schedules, but that doesn’t mean she misses out on group practices. they’re being given a short fifteen minute break before going back to choreography rehearsal, and she takes this time to practically lean into sia with a loud groan. “please tell me i’m not the only one that isn’t completely in love with the new song?” 

@fmdartemisia​

ten years or so and sia thinks that by now, she’s a little bit--at the very least, used to hearing some of her teammates whine. usually, she’s not very appreciative of many of her teammates, but with fortunately, hyeju is one of the very few in lipstick that she’s considered herself to be much closer to. and hence why she guesses she can tolerate hyeju’s whining ever so often, just a little, here and there. 

“i don’t like it either.” she picks at her nails as she tosses up her legs on the couch, double chin folding slightly as she turned her eyes towards hyeju. “but its what the company gave us, and as contracted, shitty workers being used for our talents, we’ve gotta deal with what they give to us, even if we don’t like it at all, ju.” she makes a muffled noise that sounded much like a low, whining groan, mashing her face into the pillow below her as she slowly tried to bunch herself up properly to sit up and face her teammate. 

“say, why can’t your name be a little longer? its so difficult trying to make a nickname out of hye and ju.” she mumbled, filly sitting up, dark hair in a disarray as she blinked at hyeju. “but yes, ticket is a horrible song. which parts in particular do you hate? ”