Flutissimo

my 7th grade social studies/8th grade science teacher (he did both classes. Somehow…) had a snake lovingly named Hisser. Hisser would occasionally be taken out to crawl and he was held by kids and when there were fire alarms Hisser was taken along, usually to his chagrin. 

This was one of those days where we had in class work time and most of us were just chilling and so Mr. A got Hisser out and started passing him around.

Every girl student that he came to, he would immediately snuggle up to, wrap around their arms, and get cozy. With boy students, he would just sort of sit in the coiled lump that he’d been handed in. This was true with just about every single student, and Mr. A said that Hisser likes girls a lot better than guys and this has been thoroughly proven by Hisser’s attitude.

Then Hisser was handed to me. He was a loveable cold scaley rope as you would expect, but he didn’t coil around my arms. He didn’t get cozy. He just sat there. And Mr. Anderson said, “Huh. That’s weird. He usually likes girls.” 

I passed the snake to my friend and surely enough, Hisser wrapped around her arms and got cozy. 

I came out as a trans guy about 7-8 years later, and just recently realized that Hisser was right about me not being a girl all along. 

Britain and France’s foreign policies towards one another was essentially a mutual fuck you

Russia is big and cold

(On a related point: invading Russia doesn’t work because Winter™️)

The Pope loves a good crusade

There were a lot of treaties of ‘Perpetual Peace’ that totally worked (lol)

Trying to maintain the ✨balance of power ✨ pretty much always led to war 

German wasn’t Germany until quite recently but when Germany became Germany it made everyone a bit nervous

Italy also wasn’t Italy until pretty recently

The French love a revolution

They also love a republic but aren’t great at keeping one around 

Napoleon (the first one) was a Bitch and messed everything up

Standard British answer to any reasonable request: ✨no ✨

War is the answer to everything cause who doesn’t love a good war?

The Holy Roman Empire wasn’t the Roman Empire but they liked to tell themselves that it was

The Habsburgs liked to be in charge

😍 m o n e y 😍

Britain liked ships

Spain also liked ships

So did the Portuguese

The Spanish were very Catholic  (but the Spanish Inquisition were actually expected)

Basically all the royals were related (*haemophilia has entered the chat*)

England and Scotland were Not Friends but France and Scotland were (which equaled Major Problems)

The Dutch were 💰rich 💰and everyone wanted a bit of it

Religion was a *bit* of an issue

✨ feudalism ✨

Everyone want to be the Romans 2.0 

You could making a drinking game out of all the French Wars of Religion

Everyone found the Ottomons a little bit scary (cause they were *gasps and screams of horror* not Christian)

There has been more than one defenestrations in Prague 

Poland Lithuania was not very Lithuanian

If you need to guess the name of a French king, it’s probably Louis

If it’s a English king chances are he’s a Henry

The Roman Church really doesn’t like pagans unless they have a good army that can protect them

Is your opinion different from mine? You don’t think I shoud rule the world? That’s an heresy! - said every Pope ever

Quick way to claim your power is to say “heey look at us we are the new Rome”

Are you from a noble and rich family? Good here’s money and land. Oh wait you’re not the first born? That changes things then, get the hell out of your brother’s land and either become a knight or a monk.

Are you a woman who who has ancient knowledge on how to cure the sick? YOU’RE A WITCH you shall burn.

Are you a woman who is slightly too indipendet for everyone’s opinion? YOU’RE A WITCH you shall burn.

Are you a woman and you take too much care of your hair and yourself in general? YOU’RE A WITCH you shall burn. (Yes it was a good reason to accuse someone for witchcraft)

Are you a woman and have you a particular mole on your body? THAT’S THE SIGN OF THE DEVIL AND YOU ARE A WITCH you shall burn.

Are you a woman? WELL YOU ARE PROBABLY A WITCH.

If you are a greek from anywhere and really need the help of spartans chances are there are really busy at the moment sorry but there’s rituals and stuff to do and ask for help somewhwre else.

Being called a king in the Roman republic was the worst accusation™ (ask Caesar how that went).

Augustus was a soulless bastard but at the same time one of the biggest political genious of all history.

Is it preferable to have a noble name and no money or being rich af but no noble title? People are not really sure for the whole modern era.

1700s aka the enlightment era in a few words: superstition is bullshit and maybe killing and exploiting people is not the best BUT POWER. And that’s a how enlighted monarchies were born.

Ancient buildings and monuments? Do you mean free building materials?

what an article. here are some of the parts that stuck out to me most:

my masterpost | my studygram | ask me anything

[click images for high quality]

[transcript under the cut]

Other advice posts that may be of interest:

How To Study When You Really Don’t Want To

Active Revision Techniques

How To Do Uni Readings

How to Revise BIG Subjects

guess who found that out by getting gettysburged yesterday?

It’s through a secure, HIPAA-compliant data collection site called RedCAP (which I’ve used before when I was a research assistant on brain injury studies).

Link here: https://redcap.healthinstitute.illinois.edu/surveys/index.php?s=LL8TKKC8DP