Frozen heart.

Aria Willow Henderson was without a doubt a seemingly lost cause. Her life had been spent in torture, solitude, confusion, and most of all, pain until she’d found the home that was Serenity. She’d made beautiful connections along the way, most of which can’t be named fully without accidentally forgetting someone. To name a few, Grace, Cory, Steven, Alton, and Julian. The five characters that had left the biggest impact on her life, in both good and bad ways. They taught her to love, they taught her to laugh, and most of all, they taught her to reconnect with the once beautiful flame that had shown within her. Of course, she wasn’t always the brightest crayon in the box and she’s had her crazy moments.. but, she became a character that was easily loved by the rest of Serenity. I don’t remember her having one single enemy, unless it was in the very beginning. She really grew from a girl to a woman, a woman to a mother, and most of all, a victim to a survivor. 

I really want to make this longer, but I’m already crying, because all I keep thinking about is all the really wonderful memories I’ll always keep of Aria and every character in this RPG. I can’t thank you all enough for dealing with my crazy plot lines, for my feels, and most of all, for treating Aria with so much respect and empathy. Her story is one somewhat personal to myself, and I am so forever grateful to have been able to use her as a healthy outlet for myself. 

But, alas, the time has come, and I’d like for you all to know your favorite music therapist has NOT left, and she, Silas, and Aubrey are still happily running around Serenity. She did NOT leave your character, and I’ll be really sad to see it played that way, because she isn’t the type of friend to just up and leave. But for now..

How lucky am I to have known someone who was so hard to say good-bye to.

“Well, we can’t run the risk of you hurting some poor, innocent little kitty cat,” Alton laughed, leaning in to place a kiss against Aria’s soft lips. There was no way he’d ever be able to judge her for the decisions, not mistakes, she’d made in her past. It was the past after all. All that counted now was that she was gracious enough to be with him. “You wouldn’t have to deal with his shit, I’d make sure of that,” Alton said fiercely, before pausing. “Ari…I can’t do the healing thing. My whole passion for my job comes from not healing over Tristan.”

“Nope, they’re innocent.” She replied, in agreement. She smiled as his lips found hers, and she rested her folded hands in her lap when he’d pulled away. “I bet you would. Just a shame, I suppose. I spent a lot of time trying to be the perfect little wife for him. And, now it’s just a hassle to try and find my way back to who I was.” She explained, before shaking her head, “I think you can honor his memory and not suffer from the loss. Trust me -- all it does is hurt you when you hold onto things like that. If I hadn’t let go of Aidan.. I don’t think I would be here still. And, it’ll wear at you. Slowly but surely.”

Kim was finally done with all her work for the day so she decided she would go see how Aria was doing. Alton had told her bits of what was going on but it was best to go straight to the source. Shaking him and the aggressive conversation out of her mind she walked by the music room and heard beautiful music coming out of it. She waited until the woman was done then clapped quietly. @flightlessaria

Aria had just been finishing up a personal piece she’d been working on, and she had found herself so lost into her music that when she heard the quiet clapping coming from the doorway, it made her jump. Thankfully, it was only Kim. “Oh, you scared me!” She answered, laughing at herself as she placed her hand over her heart in shock. “How are you?! I haven’t seen you in forever, what brings you to my neck of the woods?”

“If that day ever comes, I’ll be giving you the gun,” Alton half joked, reaching in to press a gentle kiss to Aria’s lips before. He hated to admit it, but he’d never really had a serious relationship before Aria, he’d always been too busy studying and working. And now, he never wanted a serious relationship again. As far as Alton was concerned, he was Aria’s for as long as she wanted him. “Don’t beat yourself up about him. You were young, naive, and broken hearted. He took advantage of you, and that will never be okay. My mistakes?” Alton fell silent for a moment, biting his lip. “I’ve never really made any massive mistakes. I haven’t really had the time, since Tristan died I spent my whole time studying. No time for friends or relationships. So I guess…my biggest mistake is never allowing myself to heal after Tristan died, and let myself have a normal life.”

“I wouldn’t suggest that, goof. I’d probably miss and hit someone’s cat.” She retorted, raising an eyebrow. She was grateful for his kindness towards her mistakes, though she wasn’t nearly as kind to herself. But, ultimately, the past was in the past, and she’d have to deal with it just like she dealt with everything else at one point. “Yeah.. I sometimes wonder what my life would be like if he still was here, and I still had to deal with his shit.” She answered, before smiling a little, “Well.. I think maybe it’s time you learn how to do the healing thing, because.. you’ll feel better. I mean, it still hurts.. but one day, it hurts a little less.”

Just a little something to help you get through Monday, I love you so much.

“Breaking your heart would probably kill me, as melodramatic as that sounds, so trust me, I’m not planning on letting you have any more strikes after me,” Alton smiled a little, knowing he sounded completely soppy and totally in love, but he really couldnt bring himself to care much. “He’s so much like his mama. You’re my little feisty family, and I love you all for it. He’s going to be just fine though, once Dr Alton has had a few words,” he laughed, nodding. “I still want to murder that guy.”

“Well, I’ll keep this conversation in mind, should you ever try to break my heart. And, I’ll remind you of your forewarned death.” She teased, though his words were comforting. Cory had left her behind, and she missed him. Steven had treated her like less than a human, and she didn’t miss him -- but she definitely was still hurt by him. “Yeah.. I suppose he got some of his good and bad qualities from me. But, thank you. And, I’m sure if Aubrey manages to stay healthy, she’ll be thanking you, too.” She answered, before sighing, “There’s not a day that passes that I don’t wish I had taken a different path. After my first boyfriend left, I should have allowed myself to heal. But, I jumped in with the first guy who practically stalked me and tried sabotaging my relationship, and.. I just needed to feel cared about. He was one of my bigger mistakes. What about yours? Your mistakes.”

Katie glanced up at Aria, listening to her instructions and trying really hard to focus on the music when she looked back down. She frowned again, pausing, “But why do mistakes make it better? It won’t sound right.”

“The only problem with that, is I don’t think I can let go of you and know you’re with someone else,” Alton teased softly, reaching over to caress Aria’s cheek gently. “I can definitely do kid occupation duty. It’s one of my favourite things to do, if I’m honest. And I do have plenty of experience in giving reluctant kids medication,” he laughed, ducking his head to hide his flushed cheeks. “I…I’m so grateful to you Ari, that you’ve let me into your family. I know it can’t have been easy.”

“Well, if it makes you feel any better, I’m not exactly planning on running off and finding someone else. You’re my strike three, it’s either swing or miss. I can’t handle too much more heartbreak,” She admitted, scratching the back of her neck. “Well, then we both have our jobs, because someone is getting a little fiesty. And, I mean, I don’t blame him, that medicine smells terrible. But, you know. He needs it.” She ran a hand along the side of his face, a little smile on her lips, “You’re right. It wasn’t. But, after our encounter with Steven.. I knew I could count on you. And, surprisingly enough, that made it easier.”

“If it’s adult conversation you want, you should probably find a different boyfriend,” Alton teased, laughing at his own joke, before nodding. “I would love to join you for chicken parmesan. Do you want me to do anything?” he asked, brushing a rogue bit of hair out of Aria’s eyes. “Beautiful, you don’t have to deal with that all alone anymore. I’m not just your boyfriend, I want to be part of your family. And that includes dealing with the rough stuff, as well as the smooth. Plus, I am a paediatric doctor you know.”

“I suppose I’ll just have to look elsewhere, then.” She teased back, raising an eyebrow at the man, though a smile still on her lips. “You can just occupy the kids. Make Silas take his medication. Because, otherwise, I can handle dinner.. but they usually get into everything while I’m trying to get things ready. And, he just won’t take the medicine from me, and it’s driving me nuts.” She paused, “You are family, Alton. I mean, I know the kids see you that way, and I do, too.”

“Don’t laugh at me, you know what I mean. You’re going to regret saying that now, I’ll be over at yours every evening after work,” he laughed, kissing Aria gently. “But a real dinner sounds good. When should we plan this for?” he questioned, nodding. “I mean, you could probably make it work. But as long as you’re happy in your job, that’s all I care about. It’s worth a try, right?”

“Trust me -- I wouldn’t mind. I am surrounded by little people, all day, every day. I enjoy adult conversation every now and then, you know.” She teased further, pecking his lips in reply. “Whenever you’re free. I think we’re just having chicken parmesan tonight. I can make enough for three, if you’d like to join us.” She offered, before nodding, “It’s always worth a try. I think I’m just in a rough patch, because Aubrey and Silas are both walking, talking, and getting into everything, and I go to work to work, then come home.. to do more work. It’s just a bit much some days. Like, Silas, I’m pretty sure he has bronchitis, and then I’m going to get it, and then Aubrey will, and.. I don’t have time to be sick.”

“Oh yeah,” Alton smiled, his gaze captivated by the look in her eyes. “Whenever you want. I just don’t want to intrude in case you’re busy with the babies. But I can’t really remember the last time I had something that wasn’t pizza,” he laughed, nodding. “That’s fair enough. And it happens to everyone, their dreams change as they grow. Maybe together we could work something out? I don’t think half the kids even know we have a music therapist so…maybe we could organise a concert or something? Get the kids involved and excited?” 

“I’m always busy with the babies. They’re a full-time job, silly. We don’t mind if you intrude. I’m certain I can find something for you to do if I’m that busy. So, let’s plan a real dinner, then.” She encouraged, pushing for a more normal night than she’d had in quite a while. “Yeah. I mean, being a famous music producer or singer or whatever isn’t really possible if I wanted to be a good mom. But, whatever, you know? Maybe we could get them interested, but if not.. at least I’m still being paid.”

Alton smiled, catching up Aria’s hand in his own, and stroking lightly over the back of it with his thumb. “Even if I had the most stressful patient in the world, it still wouldn’t stop me spending time with the most beautiful girl in it,” Alton told her with a soft smile, his gaze fixed on her face. “You know Ari, this doesn’t have to be it. There’s a whole world waiting for you out there, and you can do anything you want to do, and you know I’d help you and support you 100%.”

“Oh yeah?” She asked, blinking her big, green eyes at him, squeezing his hand that was placed in hers. “Then, when can I make you dinner again? Something other than our personal favorite of pizza.” She questioned, her eyes locked on his, a grin on her lips, “I don’t.. really want to go anywhere else. The things I use to want out of life aren’t really possible anymore, and I found new dreams, you know? I just need to figure out how to get people to realize that what I’m doing isn’t just an hour of.. sitting. Music is really important to healing, I swear.”

Alton smiled slightly and leant in to press a gentle kiss to Aria’s lips. “And maybe they do, but not in a therapy room that kids can easily get into,” he chuckled, cupping Aria’s chin in his hand and gazing down at her, the love in his eyes evident. “I haven’t met all my patients so far, but they seem a pretty good bunch. Possibly one trouble maker, from what it says in his file,” Alton told her, perching on the desk beside Aria. “How are you getting on beautiful?”

Aria smiled, listening carefully as he continued. It was obvious -- they’d both fallen. Hard. But, a part of her was terrified. How many times had she gone down this route only to be disappointed? But, she was trying her damndest to not allow it to affect their relationship. “Well, that’s good. Less stressful for you which means more time to spend with me after work. Besides, a girl gets lonely after a few hours.” She teased, before shrugging, “Alright, I suppose. Most kids come just to avoid therapy, not because they really want to enjoy the music. It gets a bit.. old.”

Katie put her hands where Aria showed her to put them, looking down at the keyboard and furrowing her brow as she tried to keep up with it as best she could. “I think that would be cool.” Katie commented as her tongue stuck out, trying really hard to follow the music.