A Tree Burns in Harlem

And I can’t remember who posted and my computer was being funky so I couldn’t reblog it or like it. But essentially, it said that if you have a mental illness, it’s lying to you. It’s telling you that you’re friends secretly don’t like (LIE) and that you are ugly (LIE) and that you are weight repulses people (LIE). Essentially, it was comprised of a short list of things that you think or feel while you have depression or anxiety, and that your metal illness is lying to you. And whoever posted that said it way better than I did but I wanted to thank them. So if that was your blog, or you posted something like that, thank you. It reminded me that what I feel right now is just a chemical imbalance. one day, I won’t feel constricted by these lies that an illness is whispering into my brain and echoing in my heart.

That the moment you need help with something and need help from one specific person, that person seems to disappear. And as soon as they show up, they act like it isn't their fault that you weren't able to get in touch with them. That they couldn't quickly text to say that they're on the train or going to the store or in class. They couldn't call you after the test was over or emailed you to say that their phone is broken or Facebook messages you to say that they're in a meeting. Or they didn't have their phone with them. Why wouldn't they have their phone with them? And then, after they explain with their dumb, obviously useless answer, because in the end, there are only a few really good reasons that someone wouldn't have there phone with them while they were in the park or at the movies or whereever, someone else butts in and asks if you could have used any other tactics to complete the thing that you need help with. NO, IDIOT. If I need someone's help with something, I can assume that I have tried everything else and it did not work. Which is why I resorted to needing this persons help. So, the random idiot tries to argue and point out several ways that you could have completed the task. Either the idiots ideas are stupid or you tried them and they didn't work. Or both. Now obviously, if someone is sick or in a very serious meeting or in school or in a place where the reception is horrible or don't have a phone, then that's a different story. But if you really needed that person, we can assume that you two are close. Which means that you know that their phone isn't broken. Which is why you are calling them. Because they have a phone. To keep in touch with people.

Now back to Neville. His parents were tortured to the point of oblivion. Frank and Alice can’t even recognize their own son. He likely saw Bellatrix Cruciatus his parents like Harry saw Voldemort blast Lily with Avada Kedavra. Even if Neville didn’t see it, he probably heard their tortured screams (like if he was in his crib and thy were in the kitchen or living room or something). Despite that, when Neville saw the boggart in Professor Lupin’s class, it was Snape that popped out. Snape was upset that Lily could have lived, had Voldemort marked Neville instead. Snape, who was horrible to many students, who told Hermione that he saw no difference when Draco jinxed her teeth to grow abnormally long, who confiscated a book from harry because “Library books aren’t allowed out of the building” (I think that happened in the first one?). But he tried to force Neville to poison his own toad, constantly called him stupid, picked on him mercilessly. I know he belittled all of his students (except for the Slytherin’s), but the way I read the books, he was especially cold to Neville. So I absolutely back the theory that he resented Neville for not being the Chosen One. But I think it made him less of a character. James was a bully in his years at Hogwarts. That is stated I get it. And he would likely be one of the people I would have hated, had he been a real person, and I would have gone to school with him. But he grew up. Lily was able to pull herself from one toxic friendship. She wouldn’t then submit to a toxic relationship. James grew up to become a loving father and caring husband. He fought Voldemort outright. Had Lily not been in danger, Snape wouldn’t have switched sides.