the mercenary

I’m really bad about that. I don’t want to be rude and then next thing I know it’s been three hours and I’m contemplating climbing out the window in the loo. …Which I would never do! Ever.

See, you say that, but it sounds like you've actually done that before. Point taken.

Hardly, Fitzgerald. But it’s nice to have days off with no pressure. I don’t need to outdo myself every waking second.

It'd be very entertaining if you did though. 

Don’t begrudge me my little delights, you know that work and pleasure are best when they’re combined into one. Speaking of which, did you manage to get anything at the Bash?

Mm, I did. Sold off a few of 'em already, but I've got some shots that haven't been used yet. Interested?

I just built a nice fire in my fireplace. I spiked my hot chocolate and I swear it’s snowing. It’s a fine Sunday to stay indoors.

That... sounds rather dull considering how you brought in the new year. Don't tell me you've hit your peak already, Harold. I expected more from you.

He’s got patchy facial hair regardless of our past but no he’s not. I used to work with him actually. He’s a nice enough bloke but I just saw him and I don’t want to sit through all the news about his new baby all over again.

So you're avoiding him? Can't even just give him an obligatory wave and be on your way? You could say you've got no time to chat since you've got errands to run.

Which wasn’t very difficult, was it? You didn’t resist at all. It kind of takes the fun out of it, you used to be more of a challenge.

I'll play more hard to get next time then-- make you work for it. You do seem to like the hunt more than the kill, metaphorically speaking.

That blonde man over there. The one with the ugly goatee.

He an old flame of yours? If so, he's got patchy facial hair.

Your talent for sharing said liquor is even more impressive. Imbibing is easy; convincing others that they want to join you is another matter entirely. 

You're one to talk. Last time I checked, you've got a niche for it as well. After all, you got me to join you just last week on New Year's. 

I’m sure that there’s a potion you can buy instead of binging on disgusting liquor, ‘Gerald, don’t despair. Don’t you have friends at Knockturn Alley?

I suppose. Though finding disgusting liquor and imbibing myself with it seems to be among my many talents. You as well as my friends at the White Wyvern can attest to that. 

What? I…. Merlin. It’s nothing really. Do you mind standing a bit to the left?

Barely. They've got a similar connotation attached, but... what're you avoiding then?

Post-hangover drinks really are the best kind. Bloody Mary?

I'll pass-- haven't got a hangover to deal with this morning, fortunately. Though it's a bit surprising considering how much vodquila went into my system. That shit puts hair on your chest.

Oh fudge.

... So are we hiding from someone or did you just put yourself into timeout?

I’m not hungover enough to justify spending an inordinate amount of money on potion ingredients — nine sickles for a quarter pound of ashwinder skin, can you believe that?

That's bollocks. Flash a smile and drop a few compliments here and there, I reckon you'd be able to haggle the price down. Or you could try your luck 'round Knockturn Alley... What're you making anyway?

If you're making a hangover cure, you're going about it the wrong way. 

Unless I remember it I don’t see how that works out. Although I guess if I did have regrets I could blame them on you and your friend vodquila.

By someone telling you all the naughty things you did. 'ey-- no finger pointing. You would've found vodquila with or without me. I just expedited your introduction to one another.

You can if other people remember it for you.

I don’t trust people who don’t eat meat. I mean where are they getting their protein? Souls, probably. Are souls acceptable in a vegetarian diet? Like eggs? Or honey? Will vegans still consume a soul? 

Souls wouldn't be vegan-friendly though. I think they'd count as animal by-product. And following that logic, Dementors would be vegetarians... right?