ahh h.. .

yes im addicted to attention and orgasms and food and shiny jewlery and 7$ Iced Lattes. does that really not sound like an awesome lifestyle to you

this pussy talk english spanish and simlish

Did you know that instead of doing the list of things you need to do that you can have orgasms alone in your room?

Sometimes I get so horny I actually touch myself sexually

(me ever since I was 12) okay I actually need to get it together now

i understand that it's unreasonable to expect a band on world tour to play in every country in the world but i do think they should only be allowed to call it a world tour if they play in every continent. we need to make it embarrassing to say world tour and then not even step foot in africa

mood swings are hilarious because you’ll be like “everyone loves me for my neverending joy and whimsy i’m so happy and cheerful a—post cancelled turns out i want to kill myself”

can we bring back the term "fair-weather friend" bc I feel like if fair-weather friends got called that more this whole argument about whether or not you should be there for your friends when it's inconvenient/at what point of personal inconvenience it's ok to bail on your friends would kinda fall apart bc like. we literally have a word for "friend who's only there when you don't need something from them" because the baseline expectation is that a friend should be there even when it sucks. like we used to make fun of people for bailing on their friends.

we give buzzfeed a lot of rightful criticism now that it’s not 2014 but that kristin chirico piece where she photographed herself in various different clothes shop fitting rooms to prove that the lighting in them is precision engineered to give you body dysmorphia still regularly salvages me from the verge of anorexic crisis ten years after its publication

One must imagine Sisyphus getting some sort of sick sexual pleasure out of all that

I need to stop replying to “how do you make friends in your 30s?” threads because all my answers boil down to “you have to want to know people instead of have friends” and I don’t think people wanna hear that

It’s like. People can tell if you don’t really like or connect with them. If you aren’t truly enamored with someone you will have a hard time coming up with activities to do together to deepen the friendship. Because you don’t really like that person that much.

Hey, I’m a random internet person you’ve never talked to before. Just making sure your fetish is morally aligned with my principles and what I consider virtuous.

[guy who has been holding an insane amount of tension in his body for a week straight] bro why do I feel so awful

Reblogging this three times in a row? Take a deep breath and take care of yourself!

i am just moved by everything now. i'm porous and everything gets inside me