There Are No Wrong Turns

It was not love at first sight exactly, but familiarity. Like: oh, hello, it’s you. It’s going to be you.

Is this the real life? Or are they baiting me? Is this a new gay ship, That I can see on my TV?

Already too late. I’ve chosen the fate for me….. I’m just a queer girl, spends to long on AO3

Although the stray bullets, my OTPS, Despite all of, The history I’m hooked on a ship that may not ever be… ever be…

Canon. It seems to me. That two women on the screen, Can really only be seen as.. Gal pals. Why is this the case? Why can’t they just go kiss each other’s faccceeee.

Shipping, ooohhhhhh You see all it really takes, Is a prolonged hug, stare or romantic gesture For them to be, my OTP and all-time new obsession.

Althooooouuugh, we should mention. That we do actually have our share, Of canon couples who now share some… Screen time on our TVs, But let’s be truuueee The White Guy™ has more screen time than they ever dooooooo.

*cough* sanvers *cough*

Writers. Here’s a few tips, If you wanna please the queers, Here’s a list of things you really shouldn’t do……

(Gay Instrumental #1)

First here’s the thing all queer characters should be: BULLETPROOF, BULLETPROOF, (just take a look at jroth). All stray bullets are a no, For a gay girls way to go, see: Hint hint Lexa. (Hint hint Lexa.) Hint hint Lexa. (Hint hint Lexa.) We won’t ever let that go…. Let that go-o-o-o-o.

It’s really tiring, seeing the same storyline. Surely you should be trying, saving a queer from time to time. At least until the end of the season three.

Lesbians, and bullets, aren’t one of the same. NICOLE HAUGHT. Oh, can you see that on her chest. (Can you seeeee) NICOLE HAUGHT. It’s a bulletproof vest. (How trippyyyyy) NICOLE HAUGHT. A bulletproof vest. (I’m impressed) A bulletproof vest (I’m impressed) Oh yes, they are the best. Stops every gay mess, oh

Oh, Oh, Oh, Oh, Oh, Oh, Oh

Oh, learn-from-Andras, learn-from-Andras, (she really likes the gays) Or make the queer females all immortal like Delphine, Delphine…

DELPHHHHIIIINNNNEEEEE.

(Gay instrumental #2)

Also remember that happy endings exisssttt. And that queer couples can also live in blissss. Root, Shaw; that wounds kinda still raw. Arizona and Callie, Greys Anatomy what the hell?

So if you’re still struggling, To write successfully, Maybe you can just watch, A show called Carmilla (season three).