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"Nothing can always go right."

Disclaimer: This is my personal opinion, based on my own experience. I'm not trying to convince anyone, make anyone look foolish, or anything of the sort. Some might find this text unpleasant, but what can I do?

I want to start with a little personal context. I grew up as someone who was molded into a tool—expected to absorb others' guilt and cover for their mistakes. Then toxic relationships entered my life. And the end result was a person who no longer feels guilt, can see manipulation for what it is, and has no interest in "saving" anyone or playing the victim. Thank you, and moving on.

I believe that people born and raised in a functional, intact family are incredibly lucky. And bonus points to those who haven't faced major, life-altering problems. Overall, this helps build a healthy relationship with others, with yourself, and with your own body. But what happens when you're stripped of all that? Even if you once had a good life, but it was taken away so long ago and for so long that you don't even remember your original self? Can anything survive beneath layers of learned masks and ingrained conditioning?

Of course, it can. But there are always two paths: try to reclaim yourself, or become a copy of the one who did this to you—that is, take your jailer's place by eliminating them. Personally, I stand for the option where you piece yourself back together, understanding that even if you won't become who you once were long ago, at least you won't stoop to their level. And not because I have any taste for "suffering," but because a character is first and foremost valuable for their story. What I'm more interested in is whether they learned any lesson from everything that happened. And Astarion did learn—when he refused the power. He literally says he came close to losing himself. And even though Astarion does feel a bit of regret about not completing the ritual, his subsequent behavior shows how he's learning to be himself. He's able to say "no," able to choose himself over pleasing the group. Isn't that character development? It seems to me it very much is.

But what if no one stopped him? I'll be honest: in my first playthrough, I performed the ritual out of curiosity. But later, when the night scene started, I felt sick. Literally. Because of the shift in his personality, because of his behavior. This isn't an "equal" relationship—it's turning your partner into property, someone who will always be dependent. Maybe in some adolescent fantasy that seems appealing, but I'm not sure anyone would actually want to be in Tav's place in real life. To grovel before your partner, to placate them if you say the wrong thing, and to know they could replace you at any moment. There's no love here—only possession. And you aren't the one doing the possessing; you're the one being possessed. Astarion takes the place of his master, having tasted power for the first time, and he definitely will not be the "nice vampire from a novel." He'll be someone who wants to turn two hundred years of slavery to his advantage, to prove he's different—by committing even more violence. Shrouding the city in darkness for his spawn is his goal. But what about the residents? He doesn't care. And yes, this is also character development, in case anyone wanted to accuse me otherwise. It's just that it doesn't exactly roll him back—no, it changes him radically. Everything has a price, and usually the character pays it themselves. But in this outcome, the price is paid by the entire city.