auxilary momfriend

rewatching the maltese falcon job and i love how sometimes nate’s solution to a problem is very clever and complex and thought-out and well-planned, and sometimes his solution is just being irritating as hell. like oh, sterling needs to be stalled getting up to the mayor’s hotel room?? no problemo. lemme just run up every flight of stairs and stop at every floor to hit the elevator call button. easy peasy. he’s like a cat in the sense that sometimes causing a distraction means slinking around and making your perfect move at the very last second after you’ve executed your flawess plan, and sometimes it’s just knocking a fucking glass off the table so it makes a huge mess

he started out dead! NO MERCY

Your protagonist's flaw isn't supposed to be charming. If readers find the flaw endearing, it's not actually costing the character anything, which means it's not a flaw, it's a personality quirk wearing a flaw's clothes. A real flaw should make the reader wince a little, should make them go "please don't do that" and then watch the character do it anyway. That wince is the whole point of writing one.

working with little kids is so dangerous. you get one kid who has a unique way of speaking & then spend the rest of your life with an internal monologue like “me’s go bathroom?”

no offense but you guys need to learn the difference between someone implying their experience is universal and a post simply just not being about you

Oh you're aroace? You should watch Blimpus and Jumbie it has an aroace character! Their name is Splonky and they're introduced in season 3 they're in six episodes, have a total 25 minutes of screentime and an average of three lines per episode. They're absolutely groundbreaking aroace representation, the show's creator confirmed it on twitter when he posted a doodle of Splonky holding an asexual flag. Oh that's not your cup of tea? Here's a list of aroace books they're all about high schoolers discovering that they're aroace after trying to find a significant other and it ends with the message that you can just make up for being a terminal virgin by third wheeling the gay couple you're friends with

You go into the splonky blimpus and jumbie tag and there's like a handful of cute fanart and appreciation for Splonky, and then every other post is people drawing Splonky making out with a variety of other characters from the show and the rest is people writing mini-essays yelling at people who ship Splonky with anyone as if that killed their grandma

What is Blimpus and Jumbie even about? Who the fuck cares? There's an aroace character who was introduced in season 3, is in six episodes, has a total 25 minutes of screen time and an average of three lines per episode, the creator confirmed it on twitter when he posted a doodle of them holding an asexual flag! You're aroace, you'll love Blimpus and Jumbie, it has aroace representation! Btw the target demographic for Blimpus and Jumbie is 10-14 year olds.

abandonware should be public domain. force companies to actively support and provide products if they don't wanna lose the rights to them

Game companies hate emulation, but none of them seem to understand that a lot of us would just buy ROMs from them directly if we could. I don't want a fifth remake of Final Fantasy IV, I want to pay five bucks for the 3MB file you already made bank with thirty years ago. Nobody who wants to play something for the purpose of retro gaming is going to consider a $40 remake as the alternative option, and we're certainly not going to let the original dissappear. They're crying about opportunity cost for a product they're not even selling.

#there is so much abandonware just...out there being used and carefully maintained#because nothing quite replicates the functionality

who up wasting their only shot at life through complete and utter inaction

this is NOT about not being productive, i cannot believe how many people in the notes are telling me that pursuing hobbies isn't a waste of time i KNOW that. what i mean by "complete and utter inaction" is doing nothing. not only am i not being productive or pursuing any goals, i'm also not doing any of the myriad things i know would bring me joy. i'm not doing hobbies, i'm not hanging out with friends, i'm just sitting around rotting away for no discernible reason

idk I can tell that some tumblrinas are not up on fat politics because I see a lot of people saying stuff like “it’s better to be a little fat than waste your life trying to be thin” or like “it’s chic to have a little belly” like okay but there are fat people who are “a lot fat” and have “a lot of belly” which everyone is weirdly silent on all the time. Like the fattest person on earth still deserves to exist in human society with joy and dignity regardless of how they got to that weight or how many health conditions they have as a result of their personal actions…that should be everyone’s baseline here I’m not really sure what’s complicated about it

People universally seem to parse it as Mean but sometimes what you really, really need to hear is "this is not a socially appropriate thing to say, and you should not have said it"

Our age of strange women lying in ponds distributing swords is collapsing

honestly fandom has ruined me because now any time i'm in the desert and i see two vast and trunkless legs of stone or a half-sunk shattered visage i'm like "omg just like in Ozymandias" and its like come on girl not every half-sunk shattered visage is Ozymandias

Yeah I saw the lovecraftian horrors and didn’t succumb to madness. What- no I’m not a cultist, James. For Christ’s sake. What you’re forgetting my friend is that HP Lovecraft wasn’t a flexible man. His brain simply wasn’t stretchy enough to take it all in. I however, have short term memory issues. Flexibility is the name of the game when you can’t remember if you ate lunch or not. What’s the size of the universe? Big. You knew that already, James. Come on now. You don’t need to witness the terrifying ocean at the base of the entirety of reality itself to know that. Pass the brandy.

You must imagine the character I’ve created here wearing a suit and a monocle, by the way.

haunted animatronic story except the animatronics are possessed by people completely unrelated to the restaurant they’re in or the serial murders