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@fellgraced
if anyone is still on this blog, i remade ! @fellgrace

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* you know, i’ve been here for a very long time. and i remember many things. i remember being at a shoreline, watching a little gray fish heave itself up on the beach, and an older brother saying, “ don’t step on that fish, castiel. big plans for that fish.” I remember the tower of babel, all 37 feet of it, which i suppose was impressive at the time. and when it fell, they howled divine wrath. but come on, dried dung can only be stacked so high.
i remember cain and abel. david and goliath. sodom and gomorrah. and of course, i remember the most remarkable event —- remarkable because it NEVER came to pass. it was averted by two boys, an old drunk, and a fallen angel. the grand story.
we ripped up the ending, the rules, and destiny, leaving nothing but freedom and choice. which is all well and good, except … well, what if I’ve made the wrong choice? how am I supposed to know?
but I’m getting ahead of myself.
let me tell you my story. let me tell you everything.
* you know, i’ve been here for a very long time. and i remember many things. i remember being at a shoreline, watching a little gray fish heave itself up on the beach, and an older brother saying, “ don’t step on that fish, castiel. big plans for that fish.” I remember the tower of babel, all 37 feet of it, which i suppose was impressive at the time. and when it fell, they howled divine wrath. but come on, dried dung can only be stacked so high.
i remember cain and abel. david and goliath. sodom and gomorrah. and of course, i remember the most remarkable event —- remarkable because it NEVER came to pass. it was averted by two boys, an old drunk, and a fallen angel. the grand story.
we ripped up the ending, the rules, and destiny, leaving nothing but freedom and choice. which is all well and good, except … well, what if I’ve made the wrong choice? how am I supposed to know?
but I’m getting ahead of myself.
let me tell you my story. let me tell you everything.
i leave for a few months and this is what the spn writers do to my son, are you kidding me

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/
Old throw-away Castiel designs I finished way long ago.
Song of the Day #3 - 1/13/14
I hear Jerusalem bells are ringing Roman Cavalry choirs are singing Be my mirror, my sword and shield My missionaries in a foreign field
Mine..(gouache, 60x30)

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` MIKLEO.
“It’s almost funny———my kin tend to eat because of taste, myself included.” Although, he should hardly ever count himself among the norm with his kin. Being raised alongside a human boy, conditioned to human necessities, meant that he would forever be an outlier, an eccentric, a mere child with pleasant thoughts and fanciful dreams of a future that may never come. “Enjoying a delicious meal is something we share with humans, though it’s hard to say if we truly do in the same way.”
Setting his spoon down, his empty bowl is promptly set beside the other. “… But I guess I can’t say I don’t understand. Even if we can possess vessels, the original soul’s will still remains, even if it stirs just for food or drink.”
❝ and your kind ... they enjoy taking part in these activities? ❞ VENOM once spat at him, the young fledgling with WINGS anew ! he remembers only few circustances when he was SHUNNED for his HEART. accusations of betrayal and treachery only worsened throughout the decades; his REPUTATION lies in ruins now. to love GOD’S creations more than thy father, was that not the task given to these holy creatures? to be their shepherd; to be their protector.
it was simply a matter of HEART. castiel cared TOO much. LOVED too much. and he was CAST OUT because of these newfound emotions. alas, thoughts deviate from the path they travel, to think about HEAVEN and all its GLORIFIED VIOLENCE ... he could not. ❝ so ... seraphim, your kin, do they possess vessels often? or are you given one at birth? ❞
` LYDIA.
❝ i prefer to ignore it so i don’t have to help. ❞
STORMS brew in the pit of his vessel / HURRICANES swirling, ravaging everything in sight. calamity rises to his throat, but is quelled with a single HUSH. angels ... can be wrathful creatures ----- but he shan't. not here. not now. and he’s calm when he says : ❝ you have no right to ignore it. ❞
` DEAN.
❝ last time i checked, i’m pretty sure all we had was beer. ❞ an even that was running on short supply. as for the mention of april though—- he’s choosing to IGNORE it. his understanding of the situation isn’t a positive one, but then again, people killing his family never are. better just to. . . forget. she’s gone, and dean’ll make sure cas eats from here on out. ❝ we can order in—- or head out. unless you wanna see just how dangerous those frozen burritos really are. ❞
❝ frozen burritos are DANGEROUS? ❞ not even pickles plucked from back alley garbage cans were DANGEROUS. alas, mild bewilderment only lingers a second longer before he shakes the thought from his mind; questioning these foods would satisfy neither of them. it would only prolong their hunger. ❝ should we decide to leave the bunker, i am warded ------- we should be safe. ❞ even when faced with starvation, his priority would always be the SAFTEY OF OTHERS.
the light in my tummy, stfu and the frame this for me
you love me anyway. i know you do.
` CAELESTIS.
☆·.¸¸.·´¯`· ▐░ @fellgraced sc. // not accepting
❛ are you a GOD? ❜ such hushed words she utters. ❛ your soul HURTS me. ❜ & surely she is better than this. caelestis doesn’t make it a habit of reading other people, it’s inconsiderate, to root through someone’s OWN BEING. sometimes, she doesn’t want to SEE AT ALL. this time it doesn’t exactly hurt, per say, bur rather pushes her out, so harshly, she cannot even brush the very surface. like she’s trying to read a CROWD OF PEOPLE at the same time.
❝ no. ❞ SOULLESS IS HE. an aura of pure light fills the void : heavenly, divine, HOLY ------ he understands how such an innocent mistake could have been made. ❝ ... but thank you for the compliment. ❞ hands rest at his sides, giving him a sort of INNOCENCE, that of which resembles humanity. ❝ i am an angel of the lord. ❞

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` TOM.
❛ NAH, s’ one of th’ few things that relaxes me, anymore. ❜ green eyes fixate on the man, ankle pressed to his opposite knee, arms stretched out along the spine of the park bench. he knew how WEIRD this might look. a random guy, sitting in a park full of kids. it wasn’t like that. children reminded him that there’s still good in the world, shit not tainted by him, or by harry. brows knit faintly, a muscle jumping within his chiseled jaw as tom mumbled, ❛ y’ got a NAME? i’ve seen y’ around before. figure i might as well match a name t’ th’ face. ❜
DELICATE, innocent : akin to a blossoming flower amid the beginning days of SPRING, children are BEAUTIFUL and PURE. souls blessed with utter purity, graced with god’s light ----- their innocence could outshine even an angel’s radiance. there is peace among chaos, one just has to SEARCH. ( and search, they both did. )
❝ castiel. ❞ a whisper of a name so powerful it could shake the earth. ❝ i come here often because it is PEACEFUL. there aren't many places you could find such tranquility. ❞
♡ freckles
send me ♡ + a word, and i’ll write a headcanon.
castiel COUNTS dean’s freckles. an angel of the lord is never plagued by exhaustion nor is he built for relaxation, so his mind often wanders during the late hours of the night. however, to escape the endless thoughts that linger, he looks to the boy who slept peacefully, despite all the agony embedded in his ivory bones. each sun - kissed freckle is COUNTED, collected, memorized, and banked into a memory database full to the brim with knowledge. each night castiel counts said freckles, he finds one more than the day before. it’s a method that soothes him. and it helps pass the time until the hunter wakes up.