I know I've been blogging a lot of information about the situation with Israel and Palestine, and if anyone is wondering my opinion on things, I am trying not to say something I'll regret in six months
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I know I've been blogging a lot of information about the situation with Israel and Palestine, and if anyone is wondering my opinion on things, I am trying not to say something I'll regret in six months

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anything for my princess 🩵
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Stephen King rightly gets a lot of shit for frequently having his characters think and speak in pop culture references that only make sense if you spent your formative years in 1970s Maine, but I feel like articulating that particular criticism on Tumblr is something of a glass-houses situation.
Like, yeah, King will have literal space aliens making pop culture references that only old men from small-town Maine would plausibly make; however, I have seen the kinds of novels that people who spent their twenties on Tumblr write, and there is also a very definite sense of time and place.
I love asking people how their parents met. You always get an interesting reply. My best friend’s parents met on the relatively new internet in 1999. My other friend’s parents met at Burger King when one was the manager and the other was a regular customer. My parents met at the beach because they were neighbors in their rental houses, mom was on a church trip and dad was getting blackout drunk every night with his friends next door.
Tell me how your parents met in the tags.
Absolute gold in the replies

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Unironically I think the early to mid 20s age group in America has unbelievably bad consent boundaries on all levels and so much language to defend it but this makes me sound like elon musk if I say it however the commonality of someone who will be like “I had 47 panic attacks and it’s your fault” if you tell them no is insane
I rejected someone and got called “the scariest person I’ve ever met” with so much therapy speak interspersed like alright okay alright okay alright okay
“You just say whatever you’re thinking and I don’t know how to handle it” was verbatim part of this conversation. Also everyone hates to see an autistic bitch
When I was in this age bracket, there was a huge emphasis on improving consent culture via graceful rejection, and it's gone by the wayside. Which sucks.
Twice in my youth (once in high school and once in college) I was in situations where I was asking someone out and I could tell they were calculating in their heads the risks of rejecting me, and both times I said, out loud, "you can say no, I wouldn't have asked if I wasn't prepared for either answer." And then they said no. This wasn't some spark of special wisdom I had - I knew to do it because feminist conversations among my age group brought it up regularly. This isn't happening nearly enough anymore.
More recently, I was really glad when we got to "rejection sensitive dysphoria" in my IOP program and it was one of those symptoms where the therapists really emphasized how it affects others. Because it does.
Being someone who cannot handle rejection makes you much more likely to violate boundaries, and yes, that includes sexual ones. Yes, you, reader who has never hurt a fly. If you don't want to stumble backwards into sexually assaulting someone, fix your RSD meltdowns. If you keep them up it's only a matter of time. Because if you're nice enough to interact with, but are known to have RSD meltdowns, guess what happens when your friends and acquaintances need to reject you?
Tbh I think the "but data centers are important infrastructure, not just AI" talking point misses that like
Ok so roads are important infrastructure. A lot of stuff that's important happens on roads. Now, let's imagine that quadrillionaire Matt Stench has decided that the next big tech innovation is the Wide Car. It's a car that takes up six lanes despite seating only one passenger.
The Wide Car is supposed to be the future, and everyone's going to be driving Wide Cars, even though nobody who makes Wide Cars is turning a profit. Employers are offering Wide Cars as an employee benefit, and getting "nah." Some employers are going as far as demanding their employees drive Wide Cars, and the result is that people take time out of their workdays to get in the mandatory gas usage for their Wide Car before driving home in a regular car.
In spite of the fact that the Wide Car is clearly set to fail, there's an enormous push to expand to twelve-lane roads to accommodate a bunch of Wide Cars that simply will not materialize. This is not an organic response to demand, but a speculative investment that amplifies the existing issues with road development for no good reason.
That is the problem.
Oh and the road infrastructure project is buying up resources other people could have used for literally anything else. With money they promise they'll be making from Wide Car sales any day now.
Remember that if you want to do more of something, you have to do less of something else. It's that time of year where people set goals for the new year and they have plans and hopes and it's always focusing on what they want to do more of. More studying, more exercise, more crafting, more socialising, more making things from scratch. Okay, great. What are you going to do less of in order to have the time and energy to do more of those things you really want to do?
And if your answer to this is "less doomscrolling" or "less bedrotting" then great, but please think about why you're doing those things. No one's doomscrolling or bedrotting because they don't have things they'd rather be doing. Actually, I'm willing to bet you have a lot of things you'd rather be doing and you spend your life internally screaming at yourself to do literally any one of the many things you want to be doing instead, but you don't have the energy for them all and you can't work out how to prioritize them, so doomscrolling spares you from making that decision. Or perhaps you're burned out from taking on too many projects and you need to rest your brain, so you lie in bed because you don't even have the energy to get started anymore.
This is going to be a really hard pill to swallow, but the truth is you might not be able to balance all your hobbies and all your projects the way you'd like. If you want to finish writing that book, you might have to reduce your daily drawing habit to a couple of times a week. If you want to do yoga every morning, you might have to accept not cooking from scratch as often. If you want to spend more time with your family, you might have to cut down on your yearly reading goal. I'm not saying give up on your hobbies; I'm be realistic with your time and your energy and be kind to yourself. Stop expecting yourself to do more and do better every single year. You don't have to constantly be growing upwards and reaching for the stars; you can be content with where you are, or even cut parts of yourself back to make space for other things in your life to bloom.
Think about what your priorities are and make peace with doing less of other things. Less is okay. Less is not failing. Less is self care.
developing the hots for ryan gosling because of project hail mary is so fucking embarrassing I swear to god. that is a conventionally attractive man. a noted hollywood heartthrob. he's even blond, are you kidding me? did he win people magazine's sexiest man alive? I don't know. I'm not going to check but it wouldn't surprise me at this point. it's such a mainstream taste. such a clichéd celebrity crush. like oh I fancy ryan gosling and my favourite drink is coca-cola and my favourite snack is ready salted crisps. jesus christ. 'b-b-but i only like him when he's in a science pun tshirt and playing a dorky-awkward loner type!' doesn't matter. he's still ryan 'ken from barbie' gosling. it's so trite. I feel like the weird nerd girl in a teen coming-of-age romcom falling for the super popular jock. don't I know that I have a reputation to uphold here? cringe.
This post is the spiritual successor to that post about David Corenswet:
I'm up to the "I dunno maybe children working 13 hour shifts is bad, guys" part of Capital and it feels important to inform people that haven't read it yet that capitalists in the 19th century were not by any means wringing their hands and twirling their mustaches about employing children to squeeze out profits, they were hiring "experts" to write newspaper articles for them, explaining how "well, the socialists have these big demands about an 8-hour work day, and taking Saturdays off, but it's actually just so complicated, it's too complicated for most people to understand, we just NEED to hire children for night shifts because the stamina of their strong, youthful bodies is the only way we can survive as a business! It's science, you see. Economics doesn't work like that, just ask our economics professors at Oxford. You CAN'T turn a profit only working people 8 hours! Trust the experts, they know. It's just so complicated..."
That exact infuriating cadence that you read in New York Times articles, in the Atlantic Monthly, in the WaPo and all the other bourgeois rags where "everything is so complicated, and it's actually a lot more complicated than you think.." that has been around since the beginning. It is nothing new. So the next time you see some op-ed from Matt Yglesias or any of those other guys huffing their own farts about how "complicated" everything is, and how "unrealistic" a 30-hour work week is, remember that Marx was dealing with that exact class of "intellectuals" "explaining" how working 13 hours at age 10 was "vital" to the "moral fibre" of those poor kids.

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Polynesians did also rely on a form of a physical map called a stick chart, illustrating the specific wave and swell patterns surrounding different island chains. These were particularly helpful during cloudy conditions when the sun and stars were less useful. To navigate the Marshall Islands, the Marshallese represented ocean swell patterns using parts of coconut fronds and shells as islands. Like a subway map, they don’t so much represent distances as they do relationships. The complex and decorative stick charts were often only understood by the person who made them. They were memorised before a voyage by the pilot who would lie on the floor of a canoe to get a sense of swell movement and often lead a squadron of 15 or more boats.
sometimes I am just amazed at how my ancestors managed to navigate the entire Pacific Ocean with these. knowledge that was nearly lost and is being re-learned.
AH! I'd heard of these, but this is the first time I've come across pictures.
Here's an idea about why kids are so anxious and depressed all the time...the environments kids are in most of the time are very stressful and don't fulfill their needs for play, rest, proper variety of foods, positive social opportunities, and freedom from fear pain punishment etc
Like everyone with any basic understanding of animal welfare knows that if you put an animal in an enclosure that is too crowded, without hiding spots, with no freedom to move around, no ability to avoid harsh and stressful stimuli, and scare it by shouting at it and punishing it, the animal will become stressed and start chewing its own fur off or hurting itself or become sick or unable to eat...
But we expect human children to grow up in these conditions and literally blame them when they develop the exact type of problems that any creature under those conditions would
ALSO! if you force any creature to sit still and shut up for most of the day, most days of the week, for their entire growth and development period....
just what do you think they are going to be trained to do for the rest of their lives? because my money is on "sit still and shut up"
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i haven't seen anything about this on my dashboard, so i wanted to share. ICE gestapo killed another human being on tuesday. he leaves behind three sons and his wife, who he has spent the last 35 years building a life with
there is a gofundme supported by the league of united latin american citizens set up to help with funeral costs, legal fees, and supporting his family moving forward.
please give if you can and share if you can't
PSA
"heteronormative" does not mean "M/F"
it means "promoting or conforming to a worldview of heterosexuality as the norm/default"
a relationship between a man and a woman isn't "heteronormative" because it's about the two individuals in the relationship, not about the views of society re: sexuality and romance. it's just heterosexual (or M/F or male/female, if you want to allow a bit more leeway for bi or pan people)
Tapping the sign again! Heteronormative and heterosexual mean two different things!!!
With the utmost respect, that is still not what it means, and this is exactly what I was talking about
Heteronormative means the assumption that heterosexuality is the default. It's a belief; it does not mean "conforming to conventional gender roles" or simply "heterosexual"
There's no such thing as a heteronormative relationship because a relationship cannot hold or promote beliefs
okay well then I'm completely lost
How so?
"Society is heteronormative" = society assumes heterosexuality is the default. Correct usage
"her boyfriend totally calls the shots; that's such a heteronormative relationship" = this person means to say "a relationship with conventional gender roles." Not the right usage but I see it a lot
things that are heteronormative; parents talking about their little girls future husband or boyfriend (not even considering that she could be gay(this inr is also amatonromativity, girlie could be ace or aro or both!)), pamphlet about domestic abuse in the therapy clinic talking about the reader as a woman and the abuser as a man (cant account for women abusers in wlw or guy victims in mlm relationships (or even a woman abuser and man victim in this case.)) Sex ed in school only explaining how to have safe and protected hetereosexual sex (not how to have safe sex between two men or two women), only heterosexual marriage is legal (why should others get the legal benefits of marriage if only m/f couples exist right???)
Things that are heterosexual but not heteronormative: a guy saying that girl over there is hot. A girl having planned her dream wedding since childhood and finally getting to have it with the perfect guy. A woman making a stan account for a member of a boy band. A teen boy putting bikini model posters up in his room. A girl and a boy going for a date.

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It's so cool to make friends in the computer (forgets to respond to everyone forgets to talk to anyone)
dont piss me off. next time you go on a trip im filling your house with galapagos finches. by the time you return, they've evolved to fill your niche. they're a better spouse to your partner. they're a better parent for your child. and? they're a better friend to me than you ever were.
one time i accidentally left a flock of galapagos finches overnight in the music store i worked in. by the time i punched into work the next day, they had evolved to fill the niches of each instrument. now they're a world-renowned band. maybe you've heard of... fleetwood mac?