jessica  delaunchy  has  never  been  good  at  tenderness  ,  of  excess  sentiment  —  a  girl  she’s  carved  from  stone  doesn’t  know  how  to  cradle  her  own  heart  without  cutting  it  on  her  harsh  edges  —  jess  is  nothing  righteous  ,  she’s  a  tornado  spinning  out  of  control  ,  an  act  of  total  self -  annihilation .  it’s  not  her  fault  if  others  get  caught  in  the  crossfire  ,  if  others  catch  on  her  edges  —  and  part  of  her  wishes  to  be  completely  detached  from  the  world  around  her  ,  to  be  completely  free  from  attachment .  she  wishes  ,  but  then  there’s  people  like  sylvie  :  one  of  the  good  ones  ,  and  sometimes  jessica  (  as  much  as  she  denies  it  , as  much  as  she  tries  to  slither  her  way  out  of  such  friendships .  )  appreciates  that  breath  of  fresh  air .   ❛  you  know  ,  i  heard  they’re  selling  fried  pickles  here  —  fried  pickles !  as  if  this  all  couldn’t  be  any  more  bizarre .  ❜    she’ll  admit  ,  this  is  not   her  usual  scene  :  she’s  not  used  to  something  so  formal .  but  she’s  glad  for  the  familiar  faces  ,  she’s  glad  for  sylvia’s among  the  crowds .  features  pull  into  a  smile  :  appreciating  &  temperate  —  it’s  a  surprising  reaction  ,  from  the  girl  filled  with  long  rotten  joy  over  such  events  ;  but  sylvie  is  often  like  a  warm  summer  ray  ,  you  can’t  help  but  feel  lighter  in  her  presence  ,  or  at  the  very  least  :  less  burdened .  ❛  are  you  having  fun ?  and  please  ,  please  ,  don’t   say  you're  a  fried  pickle  advocate .  ❜

                  she  hates  the  taste  of  wine  :  perhaps  a  lack  of  acquired  taste  on  her  part  but  to  her  ?  the  stuff  tastes  like  liquefied  boot  leather  &  stains  like  a  bitch .  not  her  preferred  way  to  waste  the  night  away  ,  but  she’ll  take  what  was  offered  if  it  meant  free  drinks .  she  scowls  at  the  dark  liquid  in  the  red  cup  she  was  handed  ,  and  ponders  if  sculling  the  thing  was  the  best  approach  before  going  off  in  search  of  manipulating  someone  into  a  round  of  tequila  shots  &  bad  decisions  ━  HOWEVER  ,  she’s  stopped  mid - thought  by  the  sound  of  a  familiar  tone .   coincidentally  ,  milan  bianco  reminded  her  of  said  wine  ,  she  often  could  only  take  him  in  small  doses  too .  ❛  oh . ❜   she  makes  a  note  to  sound  almost  disappointed  (  although  was  she  ?  really ?  )  when  she  turns  into  him  ,  but  of  course  he’s  here .  this  whole  thing  was  for  people  like  him .  they  were  practically  begging  for  the  contents  of  his  wallet  ,  for  his  nod  of  approval  ;  everyone  else  were  just  decorations  for  the  appeal .  she  gestures  towards  him  ,  a  smile  briefly  tugging  at  the  corner  of  her  lips  ,  signaling  that  something  filled  with  taunt  &  aimed  at  provoking  was  ready  to  spill  from  them .  (  as  per  usual  ;  he’d  give  her  just  as  much  back  ,  anyhow .  )   ❛  hey  ,  you  going  to  that  auction  thing  ?  you  could  finally  buy  yourself  a  date  ━  maybe  getting  laid  might  help  with  your  bad  attitude ?  ❜   a  forged  wistful  sigh  fills  the  air .   ❛  sometimes  all  we  can  do  is  hope .  ❜

she  doesn’t  mean  to  snoop  ,  not  really   :   she  didn’t  mean  to  chip  away  at  the  silent  understanding  between  the  two .  she  didn’t  know  much  (  and  visa  versa .  )  but  what  she  did  know  was  this  :  prying  into  personal  history  was  like  entering  uncharted  territory .  neither  were  willing  to  step  foot  across  that  barrier  ,  both  accepted  that  the  other  didn’t  want  to  talk  about  what  they  didn’t  want  to  talk  about  ━  case  closed  ,  no  questions  asked  ━  for  that  ,  she  respected  him  ;  because  she  understood  how  it  felt  to  be  pressured   &   pumped  for  a  truth  you  didn’t  want  to spill ,  to  open  a  door  you  didn’t  want  busted down .  but  now ?  even  jessica  delaunchy  can’t  resist  the  pull  of  curiosity  ,  not  when  sj  was  often  just  as  much  a  closed  book  as  she  was .   ❛  hey  ,  i  was  gonna’  ask  if  you  wanted  to  go  check  out  the  food  trucks  ,  really  cravin’  a  tornado  potato  ,  but  ━    ❜   brows  pull  tight  ,  perplexity taking  the  reigns  as  she  tries  to  .  .  .  comprehend  the  few  words  she  grasped  from  his  texts  ,  from  spying  across  his  shoulder .  she’ll  judge  herself  for  it  later  ,  but  for  now  she’s  making  that  step  ,  asking  that  question .   ❛  who  are  you  talking  to ?  ❜

jessica  delaunchy’s  look  for :  RENDEZ  -  VOUS  AU  PRINTEMPS .   (  cape  coral  :  event  two !  )

 PAIN HAD ALWAYS BEEN FAZIL’S BEST FRIEND  ━ a sickly man , consumed by despair and RAGE , so much so it infested his bloodstream , seeping onto his skin and laced itself within his touch. PAIN clutched onto fazil’s hand for dear life , it made home with him , breathed down his neck , and refused to leave no matter how often fazil PLEADED for him to. pain became his shadow before he even had his own , reminding him of the guilt he harbored , holding it over his head like strings on a puppet. pain became fazil , his despair and rage becoming his own ; it was all he could see in the mirror  ━  no longer was he the curly-headed boy with a bright smile and his future ahead of him , but a man with dark circles that rivaled the black nothingness of the night , and a mind that succumbed to misery. the solution ? three lines of crushed up morphine , just to get by. he wasn’t proud , if anything , he felt ashamed , fruitless , and above all , WEAK. but if it meant he could hide from the devilish man who twisted his reality and haunted his dreams ? so be it. with the look on jessica’s face , he suspects the worst  ━ does she notice ? is she ashamed of him , too ? his fears are confirmed as he listens to her speak , trying to hide the wince that begged his features to appear. his head working double time to come up with a suitable reply , one that DOESN’T showcase his hurt.  he sees no point in hiding the truth , jessica is too smart to be fooled by his shaky lies, ❝ well , it’s five o’clock somewhere right ? are you sure you’re not just jealous you’re not taking part in this, too ? ❞ he jokingly raises his eyebrow , holding a playful smile long enough to avert her concern. why couldn’t she ignore it , turn a blind eye , and look the other way just like everyone else ? he knew the answer to that question , but playing coy and sipping the sweet bliss of ignorance was better than choking on the truth.  ❝ it’s art history , and it’s the exact reason i ( need ) want to be high ,  thank you very much.❞ after all , he would rather be recognized as a bad student than what he really was. he keeps eye contact with her , grey eyes going soft , as if they were praying for her to drop it. and luckily , she does , just for a second , but fazil sees it as a big enough window of opportunity to jump through.  ❝ i’m pretty sure it’s somewhere in my closet , or actually i might have it on display as a trophy , i’m not quite sure …❞ his voice trails off , returning along with the company of a flirtatious smirk , ❝ you could always come over sometime and find out , though. ❞

                         AS  A  CHILD  ,  YOU’RE  TAUGHT  MONSTERS  LIVE  UNDER  BEDS  OR  WITHIN  CLOSETS  :  your parents tell you not to be afraid  ,  tell you there’s no such thing as boogie - monsters or jabberwocks .  as you grow older  ,  you realise the true monsters live  in the arms of strangers  ,  or the clink of empty beer bottles  ,  or the buzz in your bloodstream .  it’s those impulses  ,  dark  &  twisted  ,  gradually fogging up your mind  &  suffocating who you are  ,  that are most dangerous .  even someone like jessica  ,  all light - hearted  &  goofy  ,  has had her fair share of battles  ,  can sympathize with what it feels like to live with those creatures  ━  despair  ,  hopelessness  ,  grief  ━  and be threatened to be swallowed whole by the weight of it .  even someone like jessica  ,  all bruised  &  battered on the inside  ,  knows the light at the end of tunnels is often only a hallucination .  but in this story  ,  jessica is untouchable  ,  immortal .  in this story  ,  jessica swears she will not let it become her  ━  this is how you save yourself .  ❛  i mean  .  .  .  you’re not wrong . ❜  eyes narrow slightly as she studies his features  ,  studies the way he plays it off  :  just like she would  ,  just like she always does .  (  it’s almost annoying  ,  when she can identify mirrored reflections .  )  but she also knows better than to question it further .  she’s said enough though  ,  enough to express herself in her own silent way  ;  but part of her wants to reach out  ,  to say  :  it’s not judgment talking  ,  it’s just because i care  ━  except jess has never been one for sentiments  ,  never been one for pats on the back or comfort .  her heart doesn’t understand the language  ,  doesn’t comprehend the translation of tenderness .  (  she’s been on her own for so long  ,  she’s forgotten how to feel human .  )  she scoffs  ,  ❛   i won’t be jealous if you get caught .  ❜  her tone takes on something melodic  ,  sing - song attempts at childish banter .  she’s never been one for walking the straight  &  narrow  ,  but even now  ,  warm hues keep vigilant everytime someone rounds a corner  ━  because jessica delaunchy would have his back either way  ,  and that’s the most commitment she’s ever expressed towards a person .  ❛  eh  ,  i guess i don’t blame you  ;  finger - painting sounds more interesting .  ❜   she’s never been one for being in touch with her creative side  ,   unless  ,  of course  ,  it was in the form of elaborate ways to cause some excitement or creatively conducted escape plans  ,  and then she was the michaelangelo of cape coral .  the firm line of her lips that once belonged to apprehension now pulls wide across dainty features  :   hook  ,  bait ,  sinker . (  he wins ,  this time .  )   ❛  a trophy ?  aw  ,  did you keep a trophy to remind you of me  :  the best you’ve ever had ?  ❜  coy  ,  suggestive  ,  even jocular  :  this is jessica in her element .  she gestures towards him  ,  an index finger pointed .   ❛  okay  ,  you see  ━  that kinda’ sounds like i’m gonna’ lose more clothes though ?  just get your own clothes  &  stop trying to steal mine .  ❜   not that she minded .  it’s a very appealing invitation .  ❛  very cute though  ,  very sneaky  ,  i’ll give it a maybe . ❜  

A few dull blinks and pupils contracting as he seemed to pull his gaze and attention from a million miles away to the girl before him. Jeesh, fuck had he been talking to himself? He didn’t particularly care if someone overheard him talking to himself, he could have been going over notes, talking on his headphones, or just straight-up talking to himself like a madman. What he did not want, was people to hear him talking about what was going on in his mind at present, the events of that party were better left unsaid. What was that saying, let sleeping dogs lie. “I didn’t take offe…” his words trailed off, simply because he didn’t care. He was the one that had been plucked from his mind wandering, probably for the best, but he wasn’t about to say thank you.

His eyes narrowed ever so slightly as she kept rambling on, he had half a mind … screw it. Reaching out his hand hovered just over her mouth, stopping her ( at least he hoped ) from saying anything further. “Stop talking. I don’t need a shoulder to cry on, or someone to console me. I was just thinking about a test.” Lies, well the last bit was anyways. He never really cried or let other people see him in such an emotional state that he would need comforting, just wasn’t his thing.

                                                                      A  HAND  WAVES  DISMISSIVELY  ,  with a light - hearted tsk of her tongue .  the majority of her admirable traits  (  in her humble opinion .  )  laid within her lack of moral judgments  &   incompatibility to comprehend  ,  or sympathize  ,  with sensibilities   ━   not the best combination for those seeking to spill their hearts out  ,  but the perfect combination for her .  the girl who is meddlesome  ,  sometimes .  curious  ,  most of the time  ;  but very rarely sympathetic .  so rest assured  ,  she isn’t one to stick her beak where it’s not welcome  ,  most of the time .   ❛  either way  ,  you still looked like the thinking man  ,  and you know what ?  that’s not always a good  ━  ❜   words trail off into a faded silence  ,  bronze hues widen to express heavy astonishment  ━   this is not the usual reaction from jessica delaunchy  ,  in fact  :  not many people have left her flabbergasted  ,  but not many people have truly shushed her either . 

                                                                   WHAT  NERVE !  palms swipe his hand away  ,  with an exhale of breath that resembles something between a laugh and a scoff .   ❛  firstly  ,  that is no way to treat a lady .  ❜   she’s not one easily fazed  ,  not by sudden spurts of irate from cape - coral students  ━   not by him .  (  this was just her   :  all carefree  ,  all water off a ducks back .  )  and even now  ,  a creased brow signals bemusement rather than annoyance .   ❛  secondly ,  you wish you could cry on this shoulder  ━   that would be the highest privilege .  ❜   jessica is ill equipped with handling crocodile tears .  in fact  ,  she doesn’t even know how to handle herself in those instances  ;  avoidance is generally the best tactic  ,  so she swiftly moves forward with the topic at hand  :  him wanting her to stop talking  &  her now determined not to .   ❛  do you want some advice ?  ❜  she doesn’t wait for a response  ,  because from her very short acquaintanceship with the male  ,  she can already tell what the answer will be .   ❛  if it really is a test you’re so worried about  ,  do the alphabetical method ━  answer with  a  ,  b  ,  c  ,  d   &  then maybe do it backwards  ━   over  & over  ,  and just hope for the best .  ❜

PRESENTING  .  .  .  CAPE CORAL  ,  A NETFLIX ORIGINAL SERIES ! 

           JESSICA  DELAUNCHY  WALKS  ON  THE  VERY  EDGE  OF  THE  INBETWEEN  :  inbetween caring  &   not caring  ,  inbetween here  &  there  ,  inbetween nori ovard  &  jessica delaunchy  ,  inbetween a dead girl  &  a living one  ━  always an inbetween thing  ,  and never a certainty .  so forgive her  (  or not .  )  for her negligence with such things  ,  like futures or once - valued friendships  ,  or davina shaugnessy .  someone solid  ,  someone certain  ,  someone who cares  ━  because jessica is a reckless driver  ,  riding a highway on one hundred  &  fifty  ,  without forethought on who else could be impacted by the inevitable crash when the road ends .  (  never truly satisfied  ,  forever restless  ,  always urging  :  faster  ,  faster  ,  faster .  ) she spots that familiar crown of blonde across the yard  ,  and for a moment contemplates turning on her heel .  she’s not good with heart - felt emotional sequences  ,  or worse  ,  apologies  ;  she would much rather ignore such things until they . . .  resolve themselves .  but this is davina  ,  and jess likes davina enough to try .   ❛  your sketches are killer as always  ,  d  ━  my money’s on you kicking paris fashion week’s ass one day .  ❜  she’s peeking across davina’s shoulder  ,  but warm hues fall to her feet  &  weight shifts from foot to foot  ,  like a nervous tick   ;  because she doesn’t know how to fix this  ━  jessica doesn’t know how to fix things  ,  she knows only how to break them  :  shatter until it’s something beyond recognition .  (  trying to get jessica delaunchy to fix her mistakes  ,  is like telling a tornado to repair the damage it’s caused . )  but she can feel an itch of regret  ,  of mild shame  ━  half that night she can hardly even remember  ,  which would usually indicate a damn good time  ,  but in this instance she can’t help but wonder  :  was it really worth it ?   (  YOU COULD HAVE DIED  ,  do you not understand that ?  )  weight shifts  ,  a breath exhales  ,  &  she lifts her shoulders into something more nonchalant .  ❛  how’s things going  ,  anyway ?  ❜

                  THERE  WERE  ON  THREE  SORTS  OF  PEOPLE  WHO  SOUGHT  TRUTHS  ,  in jessica’s humble opinion  :  those that wished to condemn you for it  ,  those that wished to judge you for it  ,  &  those looking to use it as a form of comfort for themselves .  (  it was a morose way of thinking  ,  and an even lonelier world to live within  ,  but this is all jessica has ever known  :  fabrication  &  falsehoods .  )  so yes  ,  she prefers to falsify  ,  it was and continues to be the easier path  :  truths were too painful  ,  or too boring  ,  or both  ━  and honestly  ,  who really wanted truth  ,  when lies looked so pretty ?  what she was getting at here was  :  she could never take questioning seriously  ,  not even innocent curiosity .  no one ever truly knew jessica delaunchy  ,  she was hidden among the crowds of riches  &  glam  ,  and  no one truly cared for a glint when everyone else glimmered .  (  and perhaps  ,  that is exactly the way she likes it .  )   ❛  look  ,  i don’t know how many times i gotta’ tell you this  ,  my favourite color isn’t up for discussion  ,  and neither is my shoe size .  ❜   there’s that familiar quirk to her lips as she greets him  ,  lively  &  daring  ;  because any seriousness aside  ,  griffin was a likable guy  ,  and these encounters are always at minimum entertaining .  (   for her .  for him ?  probably at minimum mildly vexing  ;  but jessica proudly has that effect on most .  )   ❛  but keep trying  ,  maybe one day you’ll know my middle name  ━  ❜   she pulls her bag tighter to her side  ,  dodging the stampede of eager students filling the hall   ;  just like she’ll dodge any attempts at getting to know herself on a personal level .  instead  ,  she’ll gesture towards him in a light - hearted manner  ,  in her usual endearingly playful way .   ❛   wow  ,  have you been working out ? lookin’ extra buff today  ,  griff .    ❜

                                                                                       FEAR  IS  A  MIND  -  KILLER  ,  they say  ,  an act of total obliteration  ,  and jessica agrees   :  fear  ,  worry  ,  uncertainty  ,  she figures life is far too short  &  the world far too extensive to fret over such things  ,  and so she doesn’t .  saves herself the agony  ,  the suffocation  ,  the infection that rots through your bloodstream   &  eats away at your consciousness .  jessica delaunchy doesn’t believe in it  ,  won’t stand for it  ,  and yet  .  .  .  she’s not totally immune to it .  she can feel it now  ,  that faint distress signal  :  the itch in her chest  ,  the pressure of a crease between her brows .  she’s watching him ,  and she feels it  ,  and it shouldn’t bother her but it does .   ❛  dude ,  it’s like  ━  ten thirty .  ❜  an elbow clips the side of his  ,  enough to get a reaction  ,  enough to see bloodshot eyes  &  droplets of sweat forming on his crown .  she shouldn’t be one to judge  ,  because she’s just as bad when the sun sets  &  she needs to feel that buzz  ,  but the difference is this  :  she does it to feel alive in the moment  ,  not because going without would feel like dying .  her tongue tsks against the roof of her mouth  ,  and she taps the imaginary watch on her wrist for dramatics .   ❛   it’s not party o’ clock until five  ,  minimum   ━   and i thought you had classes ?  finger painting  ,  or some shit .  ❜   she sounds like a mother hen  ,  someone who truly cares  ,  so she swiftly averts her honeyed hues  &  lifts her shoulders into something nonchalant .  (   what she really means  :  this is serious  ,  i’ve noticed.  what she really means  :  i’m getting worried about it .   )    ❛  anyways  ,  have you seen my denim jacket ?  the one that has the ‘ plato is daddy . ’ patch ?  philosophy class just isn’t philosophy class without it  ,  and i know you were jealous  ,  so .  ❜