in the dark

I’m good, probably better than you. Mimi? I’m not sure on how to feel about that nickname.

Highly doubt you're doing better than me. Highly doubt it. But get over it, it's your nickname. Love it. Embrace it.

Your humour is so bad, I think I’m immune to it. 

Oh don't be so cranky Mimi. How are you today anyway punk?

►ROXANNE’S IPOD: track #6 is now playing

►ROXANNE’S IPOD: track #5 is now in rotation

Has he, really? Oh…that’s right. He’s the one that got shot, right? I don’t feel the need to be observant when it comes to people I truly do not give two shits about. I’m pretty sure I told you she was are. I guess while I work on my observing skills you need to work on your hearing ones. You lack in listening. You’d think you’d learn by now, but I guess that’s a side effect from being illegally blonde. My mom actually stays home Tuesdays and Thursdays for a book club she has, but nice way of trying to make her look dumb. What goes around comes around. You’d know all of that, right? Learning from experience is a good thing, Roxanne. I’m proud of you.

Shot? No. Car accident? Yes. You're pretty much an idiot considering the whole community had a memorial. Anyway, believe me your exist is far from relevant to anyone. Not sure if you realize it but you're just a bitch with money, that's all you'll ever be. And I may "lack in listening" but that's because all the words coming out of your mouth is bullshit and I tend to ignore that. And if she has a book club, does that count all 24 hours in those days? Because if I'm not mistaken those book clubs last 2 hours max, not all day. Don't be stupid love. I know Karma, sadly you don't and when your rude ways catch up to you, preferably in a way that causes more suffering than none, I'll smile and say I told you so. 

I have a low vitamin D level. I guess that means I need…THE D.

I have some Sunny D for you, cause your thirst is real. Love you to pieces Mia, but damn girl.

That’s fine. I mean, speak to me at your own risk I’d beware though. We all know how the fight ended between you and I the last time. You look way better with tears in your eyes than without. I have no problem with that happening once again. I get enough attention as it is, but sure go on. Aw, I love how you think that affects me. I actually praise my dad for it. Sucks for my mom, huh? She must live a horrible life, but why don’t you go ask her yourself? Or maybe your father? High school sweethearts were they? I heard he’s still obsessing over my mother kind of like you do over me. I guess it runs in the family.

You know that's when being self centered totally make you look like an idiot considering my dad's been dead for a total of, what, 4 years now? You're not that much of an observant one now are you there? I actually should ask your mom. But I'm pretty sure she's aware of her husband's infidelity. I actually applaud her for staying, I mean considering word on road is she's fucking Mrs. Johann's pool boy one Tuesdays and Thursday. I mean if you horny you got to get it in where you can, so tell your mother she's so great for it. Stay with her money supply, and have a dick supply on the side. I see that's where you got your morals from. But thats not much of my concern love. You do you.

No, I think we can call me King Drake. I remember when him and Nicki kissed, and all those girls were upset because that’s their husbands, but what they don’t realize is that there are enough of this Drake to go around. She’s prettier when she’s not wearing any make-up, but hey each to their own. At least she’s winning. I know a couple of celebrities who look like a complete rectangle, but I’ll say no names, even though I’m sure you are catching my drift. It’s be kind of hard to fall in love with a stripper, because the only thing I would really fall in love is with their body and their face, nothing on the inside. He doesn’t fit that, which is why he should not be with a stripper, and I shouldn’t either, because I’d probably pop off in a second. I mean, we can’t expect me to have a low self esteem, just look at me.

I don't think so, I call you pet names when I feel like it, not by your suggestion. I don't think anyone can forget that kiss. It was hilarious to me, I applauded him for that one. And just, you know, to clarify the only ones who want you Drake are the completely dehydrated ones and the gold diggers. And honestly, as my best friend I'll kick your ass if you got with either of them in more than a single night's worth of fucking. You're rude as fuck to be pointing out that girl's ailments. She can't help she's a square. I don't think many people really know how to define love anyone. So if you do find yourself completely attracted to someone's outside, then most would say that's love. I know you couldn't be a stripper's man cause one, you'd be broke, and two, you're a jealous type of guy. Of course I don't expect you to have low self esteem. I just expect you to allow others to point it out instead of throwing it in the open, y'know? If I didn't know you the way I did I would categorize you in the "let me avoid because I feel like slit their throats" category. 

You obviously didn’t get the message. The whole point of the more I talk to you thing was for you to shut the fuck up. So, take your own advice yeah? You’re dismissed now.

Oh just because you think you can dismiss me, allow me to keep talking to you. I tend to forget that since you don't get enough love from your parents you require the attention and recognition from those around. I hate that I forget that. How is your dad anyway? I hear he's still sleeping with your gardener. Mom must not like that one now does she?

True, Roxi. You’re right. I should do that. Or we should start a brand of butt pads called ‘Fix-A-Flat’ and sell them to girls on the street.

Yesss, please lets invent that. It's not like selling things is hard for us anyway. It'd be helping the greater good too, the poor thirsties need all the help they can get if they've resulted to degradation of self.

Right. In what world? Actually, by saying you won’t point it out you kind of already did so before you speak try to think a bit, y’know? Just not too much because you’ll fuck us all up. Snotty little slut? You really need to work on all of your insults. Besides, I feel like the more I talk to you the less I think of you if that’s even possible. You cause me to lose more brain cells than weed ever will.

Then do yourself a favor and stop speaking. I don't like you, you don't like me. Leave it at that Maia. 

For some reason it never fails to be the first thing I see when I step out of the house in the morning. It’s saddening, really. I try to tell these girls it’s not a good look and they look at me like I just told them I fucked their boyfriend last night so I’ve kind of given up.

I've told you a million, if not more, times that people aren't going to listen to what others say. Next time you should carrying around like clothes and tape it to their asses so it covers up the flat sadness they call their asses. 

Who the actual fuck said it was ok to leave the house with your junk out? I just want to know. 

Wait, whoa. Bring it back, who did that and how do you not notice that its just hanging all out?

Wait. You’re thinking? Wow, that’s a first. Although, try not to think so hard because I’m sure we’re all better off if you didn’t think at all. I asked if you’re naturally blonde asking if you were born with the hair color. Who knows? You could’ve died your hair. Seeing as you do act like you have no common sense I’m positive it was appropriate to ask so get over it. Always been a brunette? Huh. Who would’ve thought?

You know, my IQ is probably much higher than yours. But I won't point out the faults of you trying to tear down other's self esteem to power your own. And honestly, I could ask have you always been a snotty little slut but why waste my time and breath by disrespecting you in such a manner? You should go have a nice day and do something productive with your life, miss. 

"My King"? I think I can get used to that name. That makes it even closed to finding out who he’s speaking off. I mean, yeah he likes thick people, but thick like Nicki not like Blac Chyna. I think Blac Chyna’s ass is just pure nasty. I can make a chair out of it, but I won’t deny that if she took some of it off, she’d be hot. You could still be a stripper, just not as thick. I mean at least you have curves, and aren’t looking like my cereal box or Spongebob, and aren’t botox bimbo’s like most of them are anyways. I mean, if could be directed towards strippers, because in one song he did say that he thought he fell in love in the strip club, which I might add, that I thought that was the stupidest thing a person could ever do. You should be a stripper, how much is a private lap dance? That’s not being conceited, more like proud. 

I'd only call you that once a week or something. Or if you're good. But when I think about it I swear he's talking about strippers and Nicki. I'm waiting on him to marry her in all honesty. Blac Chyna entire body is nasty really. I mean her face is pretty when it's covered in natural make up but not the tons she normally puts on. I'm sure her son Cairo is used to seeing a clown face on a daily basis but I'm not. And I'll take that as the best compliment you could give. I would hate to look like a rectangle. It'd completely defeat the purpose of being a woman. Falling in love with a stripper is like falling in love with the one thing you'll never be able to possess completely. I mean it takes a man who doesn't get jealous at all to do that and I highly doubt Drake fits in that description. Proud, conceited, regardless its apart of the ego and yours is pretty damn big babe.

I didn’t ask for all of that, but I guess that’s good to know. I mean, that’s part of why I said he really knows you could use it, but I wasn’t expecting everyone to catch on. You are naturally blonde, right? Or no?

Be glad someone bothered to speak to you civilly. I could've simply replied with a single word and went about my day. But then again, I'm thinking that's all you're used to. And though that was far from a "blonde moment", to answer your question, if you open your eyes I'm a brunette. I've always been a brunette.