100% True Facts About Holy Grail Wars #4 & #5

nope u want it?

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"Let me tell you something about Kotomine Kirei. We were best friends in the previous Grail War. I know, right? It’s so embarrassing. I don’t even… Whatever. So then in eight grade, I started going out with my first girlfriend who was totally gorgeous but then she moved, and Kotomine Kirei was like, weirdly jealous of her. Like, if I would blow him off to hang out with her, he’d be like, ‘Why didn’t you call me back?’ And I’d be like, ‘Why are you so obsessed with me?’ So then, for my birthday party, which was an all-boys pool party, I was like, ‘KK, I can’t invite you, because I think you’re gay.’ I mean I couldn’t have a gay dude at my party. There were gonna be men there in their BATHING SUITS. I mean, right? He was GAY. So then his dad called my gunwoman mistress and started yelling at her, it was so retarded. And then he dropped out of the Third Grail War because no one would talk to him, and he came back in the fall for this one, his hair was in a mullet and he was totally weird, and now I guess he’s stabbing people in the back."

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