so runs the world away - chapter 10: if your heart has become spare parts (show your hands)
Summary: Felicity struggles with healing and her emotions. Oliver and the team struggle with how best to help her.
Title from Radical Face: “We’re On Our Way”
Notes: I’ve added some characters and character interaction that I’m not sure about. Laurel is in this story, but she won’t be a big presence. I did start this story before she died on the show though, so I felt it necessary to include her to some extent. Please let me know if it’s not working.
Also, this chapter begins to explore a little of Felicity’s headspace, which deals with early signs of depression and anxiety, with the idea that she has PTSD. Hopefully it’s not too much of a trigger for anyone, but this is your warning.
Oliver finds Felicity standing in her bra and underwear in the bathroom, starting at herself in the mirror. Her hair is down over her shoulders in a ragged mess. She’s been trying to brush it, but it’s obvious that the pain in her side and wrist is making it nearly impossible, and she’s started crying.
He pauses just inside the doorway, taking her in and realizing just exactly how skinny she is now. He can see all of her ribs, and her hips and collarbones jut sharply from her skin. It pains him to see her so unhealthy, but he knows this part of her healing process is just one more thing that will take time. The doctor told him that her diet and recovery schedule are similar to that of someone who is anorexic, the thought of which makes his stomach churn.
“Hey,” he says gently, so as not to startle her.
Her eyes raise to meet his in the mirror and she frowns, swiping at them. “This is useless,” she grumbles with a frustrated huff.
Oliver gently takes the brush from her hand and begins to work through her messy curls. She clenches her hands into fists at her sides. “You don’t have to do that.” There’s anger in her voice, but it’s not directed at him.
“Don’t worry about it,” he answers gently, smiling at her in the mirror. She doesn’t smile back, swiping again at the tears under her eyes.
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