What?

Odin: *steals Frigg’s wallet and dumps out a bunch of money* I️ GOT COINS FOR MY BITCHESSSSSSSS

Frigg: *loUD SOBBING* SOMETIMES PEOPLE JUST DON’T APPRECIATE HOW MUCH I️ DO FOR ALL OF MY HUSBAND’S CHILDREN—

Loki: look, dude, i can’t explain what happened. i ordered a drink, his finger touched mine accidentally and suddenly i was riding him. that’s just how life is.

Heimdallr: *chugs alcohol through Gjallrhorn*

Skadi: did??? did i not say vodka on the ROCKS? *stabs bartender* what’d we learn?

Njord: bitCH GON STEP ON MY FOOT,, MY P E R F E C T L Y P E R F E C T FOOT,, *pulls out axe* HOE BETTER WATCH YOURSELF

Thor: *singing a duet with Loki on karaoke* I️ *hiC* bLESS THE RAINS DOWN IN *inhales* AAAAAFFFFRRRIICAAAAAAA

Sigyn: *listening to Frigg ramble about her kids and Odin* ur too good for him, boo, dump him hon

Freyja: *rides chariot of cats into building* I️ HEARD WHAT YOU CALLED ME LAST WEEK, SQUARE UP J A N I C E

Freyr: I’m the god of peace… peas…. pees…. bees… I’m the god of bees guys

Hel: *drinks alcohol* *half of it falls through* well fuck this

Balder: oh no, i don’t drink. *loki throws shotglass at forehead*

Ran: if these bitches think they can touch my purse, just because i’m as turnt as Sif’s wig,,, y’all’re surely mistaken

Tyr: dude………………….. when did i like………… lose my hand………. weird brah

Sif: *steals microphone from Thor* BALDER’S HOTTER THAN YOU AND WE ALL KNOW IT *headbangs*

Bragi: CYNTHIA. CYN-THI-UUUH. JESUS DIED FOR OUR CYN-THI-UHS— ((bonus if you get the reference))

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